Remembering

I lay on the grass
Staring up
At the stars shining in heaven
Thinking of nothing
But the love we once shared.
The music we heard.
The colors we saw.
The places we went.
The emotions we felt.
I cry as I think
Of how full you made my life
Everyday that I knew you,
From the first
To the last.

The day I knew
That you had gone
From my life forever
Was one of the worst,
Yet one of the best,
Days of my life.
While I had lost your smile,
Your energy and life,
You had finally lost your pain.

I think back further
To the day we discovered
The beast that was
Spreading itself through
Every fiber of your being
Eating away at your insides,
Disintigrating your dignity.

I remember marching,
Crusading for a cure,
Supporting you through every arduous step.

I remember our fights.
Cursing you, calling you names,
Son of a bitch, Asshole and worse,
Hating you for getting this
Terrible sickness.
Forcing me to watch, helpless,
As the one I loved faded
Slowly into the Darkness.

I remember the way I felt
The day I recieved
The information so terrible
That I couldn't tell you for fear
Of adding to your burden.
But even though I never said,
Never even hinted,
I could see in your eyes,
As you died, you knew.

I lay here today
Knowing how terrible
It is to miss you,
And how hard all I have
To go through will be without you.
But I also know that
Your strength,
The strength you showed and taught me,
Will get me through it all,
Until the day, perhaps soon,
That I will Join you,
And we can love forever.

Gary Lee VanDyke II
January 15, 1996

Mail Comments to Lee VanDyke
Back to the Literary Page.
Back to the main page.