Well, here it is another month gone by and this wandering minstrel has yet to find a true 'home', a place where I can truly call those that inhabit the realm 'friends' It seems that absense should as they say 'make the heart grow fonder' yet i find that it instead makes those who were once friends forget. i suppose this is to be mostly my fault, as my travels and song-seekings have taken me out of the everyday events that transpire around those few I have come to call 'friend', and I should not be harsh towards them, as they have had it seems rough times in interim while i have been away. And besides, who am I but an unworthy bard, a mere music-maker and tale teller, a jester falling and tumbling for a laugh and a scrap at the table. Perhaps it is that I am just weary of the road, and desire the time spent with those whom I miss. My friend Alianna has gone through several tumultuous events of late, and I who call her friend have yet not been there to lend support as a friend should. ah well, matters of love and matters of life as always seem to pull me in all directions at once, and i suppose time will tell if I indeed am truly meant to call this fair island 'home'

--Journal entry 26 July, JaspyrNite

::She bites her lip as she flips to a blank page, then glances around for a moment before writing::

I have been doing alot of thinking as of late, most of which causes me not to sleep. As I stare at the waves late at night, my thoughts wander to all these problems and such. Such a gruling task...but one I cannot escape.

I have listened to poor Nestasia's worries and concerns about Claude, though I do not try to give her advice as what to do or how she should go about it. I worry for her, I know not why. Though because of the insults I recieve trying to help, I try my best not to. And also, I have come to try to ignore Claude, and not to speak to him, though I doubt I will stick to that long. I will, though, speak to him if he wishes to speak to me. I just tire of the arguing I get from that man. Eh it seems to know exactly what to do to anger me...and I can't stand it. I suppose he is just one of those people that bug me...so very few like that. And I try not to let people like that get to me. Eh...I should just forget the whole thing...

My friends worry me...I am going to seek out a way to help them...even if it kills me. Ben said that if it came down to that he wouldn't let me. How can he if he isn't there? Ah, I doubt theyr ealise how serious I am... I would rather do such a thing if it stops the whole transformation thing than to watch them suffer.

Saria seems to be doing better now that she is in Vrax and Tiger's care. I am so happy to see that. She is playing with the other children and finally making friends. And she seems so wise for her age! Some of the things she says are...I can't even believe that they come from a 5 year old. Amazing.

Ah well I have rambled on long enough!

--Journal entry 26 July, Lina Metallium

::Having set off for the Bazaar, he stops at the scribes and buys the cheapest parchment they have. He could use some back at the Guildhouse for free, but doesn't want to be indebted::

To Whom it Concerns,

As I now must find my own way, I thank those who've shown me kindness. I even thank my Father, as strange as it seems, for not allowing me to wallow in this Curse. I am whether ready or not, a man, and must act accordingly.

When I have made a name for myself, perhaps I will return. When I have enough gold to live properly, I'll maybe be a benefactor of the Foundlings, or have a shop..::his thoughts swirl in his head, a boyish dream of Knighthood gone, he's emotionally far too young for that, so he tries to find what's practical::

Jane. I am sorry I put you out, in a position where you felt you needed to watch over me. Telling me I didn't have to stay with you..I think that was your nice way of letting me know you didn't think it best. But you are someone that I could...love..if you let me.

::Looking at the scroll he's written, he tucks it away and goes to the next shop, to buy some canvas, to make a tent. But this scroll drops out of his pocket, and a gentle gust carries it to the elves::

--Journal entry 26 July, Breuse Carazzi

*Sitting cross-legged upon the beach, his dark eyes contemplatively watching the sun-set, the rogue puts pen to paper*

Wanderlust brought me here... or maybe fate.

Right now I'm sitting in sand, just offshore, watching the light idly paint the water, and I'm wondering about higher powers at work. When I got on that boat three days ago, I had no idea where I'd end up... a brilliant habit of mine, to just go with no plans. More than once that 'brilliance' has gotten me in a tight spot, but this place seems safe so far...

I hear rumours of dragons and ogres and elves... The first two, I worry about... for even a resourceful thief has nothing on a dragon, save maybe a good hiding spot. Ogres I can handle, and have done so in the past... miserable bastards, those.

The elves are another story altogether... I may seek them out, just to learn from them. I've had good dealings with the elven kind in the past...perhaps they can sense that? I feel drawn to their hidden villages, as though there's something there for me to find. Here's hoping they can get past their distrust (ablbeit deserved) for humanity. I'm different though.

Business. I haven't yet decided on any plans for this island, as far as 'business' goes... I've taken enough from various sources to ensure my survival for a while yet. The pirates are ripe for the picking... it'd be perfect, if only I could find a way to manage a perfect theft without taking the blame... I'll think of something. Now, to the jungles, and the elves...

*the rogue folds closed the journal, and packs it away ...he walks barefoot among the waves for a time before pulling on his boots, and heading toward the lush foliage of the isle*

--Journal entry 26 July, Talin Altarrant

:;She looks to the egg and then the departing Alterio as she begins to write feverishly having no way to express her feelings other than this::

I was proud of myself today...With the help of Lorax and the Serpent I was able to get my friends back to normal. I was so happy... And in return for rain Lorax and I look after an egg until it hatches. But if it is harmed...well I won't get into that. Though I saw the pleading in tehir eyes for my help when they were taken hostage by the Sharken, I could not help but to help, and besides, I couldn't stand to see them suffer the way they were. Though did I get a thanks? A thanks for getting them back to normal or for getting the rain? No...

Then a few moments before I began writing this entry, Alterio comes back from a duel with Nemesio. He has to leave the Island for 30 days...leave his family his children... I could do nothing to right that now if I wanted to...not while in the possesion of this egg. So he left not long ago...saying his goodbyes and giving me a simple kiss on the forehead. I will miss him so. He is like the brother I never had...in a sort of perverse sense...at times. I write this all hoping the tears do not run the ink. Everyone is hurting now...and I have an awful feeling creeping over me. I cannot explain it...and wish I could. Oh how I wish for someone to comfort me...someone I could lay on their shoulder and just cry...without feeling weak or a fool for doing so. I doubt anyone knows how this all makes me feel.

I have the weight of the island and the citizens on my shoulders, along with the heaviness of my heart as I listened to Alterio say goodbye to his children. Perhaps when I head off to the guildhouse this eve, Lorax will lend an ear...seeing he understands half of what, if not all, I am going through at the time being. Ah I doubt sleep will find me again this eve.

--Journal entry 26 July, Lina Metallium

*Making it a point to rummage through the library of the Manor, Lia finds a blank volume, and sits with the book spread in her lap; remembering being told of her Mother's journals when she was very young. Having seen enough silently distressed patrons in the Dome she has some idea about the soothing properties of writing, although becuase she cannot write nor read she isn't exactly sure of the details. Turning the pages she quietly mumbles to the book hoping it might make her better, her face tense and painted with the exhaustion of more sleepless nights, her bad dreams returning.*

Diss tupi' fing be'r work or elz I do ba'fings to it...mebbe I beeshoo up fingy wiff paper inside!

An'way..Lesserday was ba'day..an' I mase A'kane mad wish I dinnint mean to! I juss not know wass goan on wiff him...and if I dunno wass goan on wiff A'kane den mebbe I not know wass goan on an'wur..

Goed wike diss okee? Hey! you lissnun'a me fingy? Kay:

I gotted my mens all fissed by da guy wiff d'name da sounz wike Lo cept I dunno d'end of it (Lorax) and I wansa show A'kane dem cuss I wansed give him my mens for his bird-ey (he's a growed man now!) but I broked dem..and DEN when I goss der he was owside wiff da UDDER girl Sar-yah. Bu'I know pea-poles noss nice'a Sar-yah- cep I dunno why cuz she isna tenmow (trenchmouth) or sick or an'fing, she is a nice girl and she giss me dowwy!- bu'she was siddink wiff A'kane and she was givin'him DA look like how coodeez pea-poles give sh'other yous know? wike...wike Ti-ti an' Rass (Vrax) or Kickshin and A'trio or sumfin...and I canse be mean'a Sar-yah cuss dass mase her feel bad but she mase me mad! Cus..

*Lia blinks about quietly and pulls book more closely into her lap and puts her lips close so as not to let any secrets leak out*

A'kane is pose-uh be mine, Mia sayd he c'be my foosher hooband- wu'ver da' means I fink i'meanz you gossa pay'f 'em foreber- and I wike dat dee-uh cuss A'kane is d'only Growed Man who is my fren...and if yous tell AN'ONE bou dis I giss you wha'fers!..

but an'way I fink A'kane is not pose-uh know dat cuss he hassa be a La'ys Fing until he is more growed-ful..

But AN'WAY Sar-yah dudn't know Mia wike ME and she isn't HER Boss I"m d'only ployee so how come Sar-yah gessa pay'f A'kane foreber? An den I feeled all tupi' cuss I ha'my tupid mens and A'kane didunt wanna pay whore I guess cuss he was beink a Alive Saffer and Sar-yah was the Tassel inna Dress (damsel in distress) and he saved her (I didunt know what he talkde bout!) so I feel like I no'good and I neber beed a Tassel inna Dress but dass cuz I'm posse-uh be a Warr-yo *warrior* and deys not llowed to be Wusseez..An'way..diss innunt make me feel budder I just feel all empee..so I gose find the cookie or sumfing..

*Lia stares at the book, her sea-green eyes lingering a moment, distraught at what boils within and amounts to the steam of unresolved issues and frustrations. She is nearly certain her feelings for Alkane are not the 'coodeez' kind yet and wonders what would possess Saria to have such..but she knows also that Alkane is supposed to be charming to everyone, so goes the Family Name and everything else Alkane was created for, and for what he stands. She tenses her brows and despite the anger that prickles over the surface of her complexion she quietly shuts the book, leaving it plainly in the middle of the floor and drags her knightgown-garbed self from the library in search of cookies and a relief from everything that seems to be falling upon her into confusion.*

Wish Mia was here'a hewp me be Bray (brave)..

--Journal entry 26 July, Thirlia

::The isle still within sight by moonlight and stars, but it's small. Too small to see the harbor, or make any figures out. If one stares long enough, he could see things if he told himself enough times that they're there. Squinting and pretending. But he's still in shock regarding his situation. And still hurting like hell. The waves churning but nothing too rough, he drops anchor off the coast, deciding to sleep. But he can't sleep. It's too damned quiet. No Marissa crying at the ungodly hour, or Mia whining for another glass of water. No drunken, bawdy songs can be heard coming from the Pleasuredome..Hell, again, he can't even see the Pleasuredome from his exile. He lights a lantern and going through his satchel, finds his journal and quill.::

Night one.

What in the depths of hell was I thinking when I agreed to the duel with Knight Canales..he bested me as a page, he bested me again. But this time, I was more than simply Mirell's young lover, more than a boy. This time round, I'm a father, responsible so I like to think. And I didn't even get to say goodbye to most of my children.

What will happen come morning when Mia and Thirlia, my god..Thirlia..::shakes his head as he realizes he's promised her never to leave, what will Vixen tell her..his throat goes dry at the thought:: come in to jump on the bed, bouncing to wake us up. What will happen if Kate brings Christopher by to see me? Or if, I know it's an enormous if, but what if Lily chose this month to holiday..bringing Carina and Nimiane by.

Mairin's a good girl. Strong. Not as strong as she or I would like to believe, but stronger than most her age.

Marissa is far too young, she'll not remember this.

Alkane? Well..Alkane's got little use for me it seems right now.

Breuse? ::Smirks:: He'll likely throw a party.

Nine children. No father.

I know Alianna, Ben and my friends will do their best to look out for them. But what of Vixen. I know that when..::the sea sloshes and he decides to be more of a realist:: IF I return..she'll likely be paler, thinner. No time to sunbathe without me to take away some of her responsibility. I know she'll toil hard, fingers to the bone, trying to keep it together..

..I'm so sorry.

Nemesio, laughing. As he always did, as he always will.

Damn you, Alterio, you and your false pride. The same false pride that's always gotten you in a bind, did it once more.

::Squints out into the distance, the crystalline ship seeming far but visible::

Dan, I wonder if you've reached it yet. I wonder if we'll cross paths. I hope you find Mags and Nun. And I hope I get back alive.

I miss you all, already.

::He waits for the ink to dry, then goes into his stock of rye. Not enough for 30 days, not with his alcohol tolerance. But with luck some passing merchant ship carrying his drink of choice will pass, maybe before a band of pirates who could prey on his vessel. In time, he sleeps, restlessly, on deck. Wanting nothing more than to go home. In one of his moments of wakefulness, he rips this page from his journal, stuffs it into a bottle, corks and throws it overboard, and the lantern's light illuminates the bottle finding the channel, the current that may bring it to the Silver Seaport.::

--Journal entry 27 July, Sir Carazzi

"rubbing her eyes as she squints out the window at the darkness...seeing nothing but darkness she sighs and picks the quill up as she looks down at the blank page"

Well many things have happened the last couple days. Some good and some not so good. The drought is over and we dont have to worry about dying from starvation. Lina brought the serpent to save up, Alterio, Black, Ali and me. And the serpent brought the rain that we needed.Now lina and Lorax has to care for his egg for the next 14 (irl) days. I know thats going to be hard for them.

I know im not much help. I have my own demons to fight right now. "shakes her head as she thinks back to last eve and watching Alterio have to leave the island".... God i never thought i would have to watch that. A banishment duel with Nems and Nems won. I stayed at the dock for a long time after he left just looking into the darkness. Long after his boat was out of sight. His silent words to me just before he left "sighs shaking her head" Black asked me what he said.. I couldnt tell him. I just said "nothing.. it was nothing". Its all i have to remember for the next 30 days and I cant share that. Thats the only thing that will keep me partly sane and waiting for him to return. I wish he could have said those words under different circumstances..not as parting words. It was so hard to watch him leave. I wish i could have stopped the duel but i knew he wouldnt listen to me. I would have been told to shut up and mind my place.

Stupid damn man! God i miss him so much. I came home early to be with the children.. Couldnt stand being at 'dome after he left. Tried to sleep a little but it wouldnt come. Up walking the floor for hours now. Checking on the children and making sure the guards are alert to any and everything. I did as he asked, extra guards are posted everywhere. This place is like a fortress now. Not that it wasnt before..

With all the food supplies that we stored when we heard of the drought, hell I wouldnt have to leave the estate til he returns. But with Nems on the loose, thinking he can take over the island.. well i guess i cant let that happen. I would feel as though I let Alterio down, If I stayed locked up in the manor til he returns. Nae, I wont let Nems take over. "rubs her throbbing temples, lack of sleep,stress from his absense bringing on a throbbing headache" He left me with more than the children to have to worry about. Does he realize that? How do I stop Nems? How do I control my temper with Nems, without Alterio here to yell at me? Gods I cant. Im so angry i want to kill him right now. Nems..not Alterio. Alterio needs a swift kick in the ass for dueling him for any kind of banishment.

"knows she is just babbling but doesnt care, its something to do to kill time... she glances out the window muttering ":Damn you ALterio, you better return to me safely"...

I cant hardly make it through one night without him, how do i get through 30 days and nights? I feel so alone on this island. Friends? Im not sure i have many. None that i can talk to at any rate. Ive made a quite a few enemies since we have been here. Because Im..me and i dont bow down to what most think I should be or I dont act the way they think I should. Well thats tuff...Ive earned my attitude, be it bad or good. I earned it the hard way. I cant please everyone else and please myself at the same time. Some fear me and steer clear of me. That is suppose is good..well be it good or bad, doesnt matter.

Damn you Alterio, i want you here, not out there drifting around in the dark in that damn boat. We need you, the children need you. And I need you most of all. Clothing, jewelry, money.. i have it. ANd you know what? It means nothing to me. I hardly ever wear jewelry or the fancy dresses. Why do I wear your silk shirts? Even though they have been cleaned, your scent is still on them. Thats why i wear them. God maybe they are right. I am obssessed with you. As for money, I hardly ever spend it unless i buy something for you or the children.

"frowning as she hears Marissa crying again, she scribbles down one last thing hurriedly " I Love you , please return to me and the children safely...

"she lays the quill down and gets up to go check on Marissa"

--Journal entry 27 July, Vixen Blade