Brief Journal Entry, 20 December, Vixen

**Starla quietly leaves the ship with her meager belongings and moves up the beech a few paces. She stops and sits on a stone and sets her pack beside her and for a few long moments watches the sun sinking into the ocean. She removes her journal and begins to write in an elegant script...**

Day 1

Dear Journal,
I have finally arrived at the Isle that I was told would further my learning in the healing arts. I have only arrived as have yet to see another soul, with the exception of the ship mates and the few women that seem to hang around the docks. I will seek out my brethren to begin my training.

Starla

**She stops writing and closes her journal and then looks up to finishes watching the Sun and the Ocean in their dance at the end of the day and softly smiles.**

--Journal Entry, 21 December, Starla Morninggold.

*Watching the ships come in, she and her friends laugh at a "newcomer" from the port. She goes home to write about what she saw, have a drink and laugh some more*

See.

See fools.

See fools board a damned ship on the Mainland and come here in some masquerade.

And try to win friendships lost long ago, back, under pretense of "friendship."

Oh, journal. I've been kept away too long, I see them waft in and out of port like bad smells. This one..oh Journal, I thought she was a friend. I should've known when she wronged me the first time, that she wasn't. You see, she likes to tell stories and twist things to her advantage. Her lover does, too. But time passes, memories fade, and sometimes you give people another chance. Stupid of me to think people change.

She lied constantly then, and does so now. She omits truths from her lover and points fingers at others to make them out to be the ones who are "hurting them." I hope she takes a long walk off a short pier. I see her for what she is now. I hope she goes as quickly as she came.

--Journal Entry, 21 December, Cipriana Vyras.

**softly sighs in disapointment as she walks back to the ship and prepares to leave the Isle. She sits on the dock and pulls out her journal and begins to write.**

Day 1

Dear Journal,
No sooner did I arrive at the Isle did I realize it is not all its cracked up to be. Oh sure, its the life if you want to be in subservitude to the house Carazzi. There is no justice here. Will I find myself murdered in a back ally way and nothing done about it? Most likely. My grandmother once said. "If ass kissing involved teeth, there would be more hanger's on." Yes, I am bording the so called "Ship of fools" to get back to the main land. But I wonder, are the fools the ones on the ship or the ones that stay on the isle and cower before those few who will banish you if they do not get their way.

--Journal Entry, 21 December, Starla

**she sign's her name, boards the ship and realizes that there was a pall over the Island that she did not see before and smiles to herself as she will never be under it again.**

*Waves goodbye to the ship and notes that someone wasn't on it, that her journal's floating in the water*

You know..it amazes me. *Smiles as she recalls the words that are washing off the page, that she saw while out by the pier, where Cipriana could've lent a hand..but didn't.* No Carazzi made contact with her, she barely stepped off the boat. And when she did, she slipped! Alright, well..maybe she had a bit of help. Does it matter? *Giggles* Plunged right in with a magnificent splash! It was grand, so grand, so poetic. And oh, she dies in her lies..who says there's no beauty in death? *Laughs again, and watches from the window the scavenger children fish the drowned body out of the water, rummage it for any valuables, then throw it back in*

--Journal Entry, 21 December, Cipriana Vyras.

*Streatches out in bed gently, and reaches for her journal upon the floor next her. Pulling the netting about her canopy bed closed, and covering a yawn as she begins to write*

Hard time sleeping lately, well, I can fall into sleep fair enough, yet cannot seem to stay that way for long. So much happening of late.

It does seem that according to many, M'lord Carazzi is alive! Aye, i know tis something of a shock. I would nae believe it myself if i had not heard it from Ros and Vixen...seems that the mages upon his homeland have revived him, and while i am happy to hear of this, I know such a gift does nae come with concequences. ..He is nae able to return to the Isle..EVER. Though i do hear tell that upon his fathers consent, he will be allowed visitors. Of course Vixen, and the children, and i'm sure Lyri will as well. All in all i think this is wonderful news. For truth be known, while i will probably never get to see him again, at least he will have those he cares the most for about.

As far as the dome is concerned, things seem to be as normal as possible...though there is this mysterious stranger that keeps leaving notes posted upon the door, trying to incriminate Vixen in the murder of Ben. From what i hear the SSAG has already closed the case, and yet this "stranger" still insists upon leaving these horrid messages about. I have my own opinions and memories of Ben, and while i seemingly can not speak of them out loud in the dome, I do nae wish for them to be desicrated by the constant "detailed" letters left all about. I do so hate details of unfortunate things.

*shivers and pulls the down blanket up about her shoulders and continues to write*

I have been experiencing my "cold spells" more frequently of late. I was utterly baffled as to why untill just the past eve, I was sitting in the dome, discussing the past events with Eyas, and Ros, whence suddenly i was thrown into a fit of chills..so bad that i felt it again in my bones, and from what i reacall being told, my lips began to turn blue. Last i remember i could nae even walk to the couch without assistance. That was it. the next moment, Ros had her face but a few inches from mine, and was crying! I asked her what was wrong, and all she could say was.."You called me Rosie"...

I have nae ever called her Rosie in my life, when i stated so, she continued to cry and told me that I had called her Rosie, and only her grandmother had ever called her that before. Well this would nae have been so strange, except her beloved grandmother is deceased!!

Suddenly Eyas reached for a book and began to thumb thru it, he seemed in shock as well, seems i had said a few things that i do nae remember...not only did i mention Ros's gram, but also something about a "tyrst with the two of you", and "i will defend ye my queen"....Though i swear nae remembering any of this.

Comes to pass, as Eyas was reading from this book, that there was something in it pertaining to the ability to "feel" whence a spirit of the dead is near...the person in question gets deep cold chills, as the soul passes thru them. I swear i have never heard anything of the sort in my life..sounds to much of one who is touched. Imagine, being able to "feel" the souls of the deceased.

However it all seems to fit. From what i am told, i not only got cold, yet i actually spoke a bit of the deceased's words. The tyrst being from Alt..Rosie, being from Ros's grandmother, and the "Queen" being from Ben...

Another interesting point i must write of is that the next day, when no one knew of M'lord Carazzi being resurected yet, and Ros was speaking his name aloud, I did nae feel a thing. I was nae cold, did nae speak in his words..nothing..twas as if nothing had ever happened. The moment we found out that he was alive, all became clear. And i could no longer doubt what is seemingly happening to me. Tis so scarrey, if many new they would surley find me touched in the head..I would be sent to wonderland upon the first available date!!!

Eyas wishes me to speak with Morte about this, seems as though Morte is knowledgable in such matters, though i fear him a bit, any man that carries decapatated heads about the isle with him, just may be more touched then I. But i fear he is my only hope of understanding this. And i am quite sure Eyas would nae allow me to be in the presence of anyone he felt would endanger me. So i will trust in his opinion.

I have finished my shopping for Yule, I do hope those i purchased for enjoy their gifts...*pausing a moment thinking upon one in particular, wondering now, that the situation has changed, if they will ever recieve it, or know whom it was from*

Seems Tae is back upon the isle, for how long i do nae know, though lyri is very happy. I am glad as for the longest time i did nae know how to comfort her, my heart was bleeding for what seemed like an endless depression for that woman. She is a complex person, that lyri, though i still think of her as a friend. I wonder if she remembers being the first i ever spoke with upon comming to this Isle....

I have nae seen Ros or Eyas for the past few eves, though i am quite sure Ros's absence is due to the upkeep of her new shop, takes quite a bit of ones time to get a new business up and running. As for Eyas, I do pray that Morte is nae working him to hard. Seems that he has been giving him quite a bit of meaningless work to do lately, cleaning of the ship and such...Eyas is better then that, though he does nae complain about it. Takes it all in stride it seems, though i'm sure there is more happening about that ship then he tells me. Of course i am but a woman, and he probably thinks i would nae be interested, either that or something questionable is afoot, and he wishes nae to involve me.

*yawns*

Well i shall write more when i awake again..the gods seem to rather enjoy tormenting me with this restless sleep*

Till we meet again...
Charquin.
Journal Entry, 22 December.

:Sits down with a scroll out on the beach:

Sometimes I wonder, does this world hold only sorrow.. does it hold only pain... I found one i could love.. yet I do nae know if she loves me in return. With all the depression and pain lately I have been avoiding contact with most everyone.. I do nae know if that is right.. I am just a bard.. I do nae know how to counsel everyone.. I am happy for me brother and his lady love though.. I think that they now have nae anymore time for the younger brother who they probably think of now as a mere tagalong.. I am happy I found him.. but mayhaps.. just mayhaps tis time for me to journey along.. I will wait two weeks before deciding.. I hope that The things I wish for will come true... though with me luck they will not

Journal Entry, 22 December, Attrei Drasonin Nuvanin

::Stands and walks to his room at Ros's and puts the parchment on his bed then heads for his patrol route as a wreckmaster::

On this night I saw a image on my sword as I was spinning it. I am not sure what it means but something I must find out for sure. I know it is linked to my past but how i do not know as of yet.

Log Entry, 22 December, Khalidan Steyr.

Dear Journal;
Well I have heard it and seen it. They speak of him alive. And on the mainland at his father's holdings. How wondrous this miracle is I should not have words to express. My heart leapt for joy, yet I simply sat, still and quiet. I did not speak to the elder Carazzi as I have no business with him and I am sure he does not wish further contact with me or any of the 'general public." I know his kind. Being an aristocrat, he sees himself above the 'regular folk.' That is all well and good for him. And if I keep to myself I should be fine and go unnoticed. Which is what happened, really. I was ignored and unnoticed.

Except by Vixen, who made it a point to ask me why I was there. How odd that she should decide to speak to me. She told me she dislikes me greatly, or was it that she hated me? Oh no matter, it's all much the same to most people. I hold no animosity toward her. As I told her, we had 'wanted the same things.' I think we still do in the long run, though my desire for any 'mutual interests' as it were has been affected greatly. But I believe she sees my presence as a very minor threat, possibly more of an annoyance really. Which is absurd.

It is becoming increasingly apparent to me that people here do not look at things at all in the way I see them. I should have noticed that sooner. I believe it would have saved me some trouble. Ah well. That is how things work. All this jockeying for position and such. What nonsense.

oh I met a bard who asked those most pointed questions. He seemed to be investigating not only Alterio's death but, he was more focused on Ben's, referring to the whole thing as a double murder. I told him I hadnt been around and that I didnt know anything but the generally accepted version: that Alterio had been doing his knightly duty and Ben killed him trying to get away, and that Vixen in response, killed Ben. He got a little personal, though, questioning me on my contact with Alterio and with Vixen. I think he was wanting to know the type of persons he was investigating. I told him little and made sure that he knew any recount of actions was indeed my own point of view.

I quite blatantly said at one point that what passed between myself and other people was just that, between us and no one else need be involved or know of it. Some things are better left alone. Just as some words would have been better left unsaid or acted upon. What folly have I fallen in to, that this should happen.

In retrospect, I should have never told him, I think, that I loved him. Ah well. Over and done with.

On a personal note, I would hope that things work out and that they end up happy.

As for me, well... I will just.. 'end up.' I will work and continue to live. The Future continues to present itself and Prospects seem dimly lit, but that is more than likely just my current perspective and will change with time. I will write more later

Journal Entry, 22 December, Xanthia