Waves against the shore,

dark water of the sea,

an ocean in my pocket,

a nightmare of the mind.

Drowning in my inner sea,

just water everywhere,

the darkness that fills me.

I swim toward shore,

but it's too far,

hundreds of years pass before I reach it,

yet I'm still alone.

I wander the dark sand,

looking at the dark water,

thinking dark thoughts,

wishing that I could be alone without myself,

that I could rid myself of me,

anything to silence that inner voice,

that I could leave my inner darkness,

that I could re-enter the outer light.

I would be a like a phoenix

rising from the ashes of the fire of my birth,

disaster averted with a single swoop,

the swing and fling of my hips,

the swirling and whirling of wings,

I would swoop and curl,

like a bird set free from a cage.

If only I could leave this darkness,

to see the beauty of the light,

that would be exquisite,

a dream come true,

a leavening of the weight on my soul,

a forgiveness for all of the things that I never did,

a freedom never known.

I would rise in wonder,

I would bathe beneath the silvery beams of moon,

I would drink in the life around me,

if only I could leave the inner room of my mind.

I would dance and I would sing,

I would relish all I have,

if only I could leave this sea,

if only I could escape,

to break away from the darkness and disillusionment

that is me.