Dark Blades

Our sweet Seattlite, Big Poppa, was gracious enough to sit through an interview with Dark Blades regarding his Seafair Torchlight Parade experience on July 27, 2002. Read below to get some perspective from one of Apolo’s straight guy fans.

This is our exclusive Dark Blades photo from the Torchlight Parade in Seattle on 7.27.02 contributed by our dear patron Big Poppa.

Apolo Throws Out His New
Beanie Baby Doll to Parade Fans
an interview with Big Poppa

DB: Did you do anything special to prepare for the parade?
BP: It was all about the batteries babe!

DB: What time did you arrive?
BP: We arrived at what we thought was early — about 6:30ish.

DB: On which viewing location did you settle? Did it turn out to be a good spot?
BP: We had pretty good seats; they weren’t front row. I don’t like the front row anyway. You run the risk of 1) a motorcycle running you over and 2) getting soaked by the clowns.

DB: Later we found out that the viewing location Big Poppa had picked was where every parade entry from marching bands to monkeys on unircycles had to stop to wait for the procession to catch up — all BUT Apolo’s car, which just kept on rollin’. So sorry, BP.

DB: Were there any special food items or refreshments you brought along to enhance your enjoyment of the parade?
BP: Fig Newtons, Luna bars and fruit punch

DB: As far as the weather was concerned, was it hot, cold, or just right? Humid?
BP: If anything on the warm side — but I can’t complain. I’m under a cease and desist order from God.

DB: Where did you display your Dark Blades banner?
BP: Banner?

DB: Was Apolo surprised to see you out in the crowd?
BP: It turns out he couldn’t see me behind my camera. But I’m sure he felt my presence and from that came a sense of confidence that Dark Bladers were there in support.

DB: So, what cologne did you decide to wear, and did Apolo notice?
BP: No cologne — just natural oils. I don’t think he noticed. He always glosses over the subtle touches.

DB: Did you present Apolo with any gifts?
BP: I was there. Wasn’t that enough?!

DB: Were you surprised to see who was driving the grand marshal’s car?
BP: Indeed I was! That was my brother’s best friend’s brother. If I would have known that earlier, we would have had an autograph — to be sold on eBay per sshhhhhhhhowa.

DB: How was the parade overall? What was your favorite moment? What was the worst?
BP: My favorite part about the parade was the killer parking that we had. Just like good sex, we were in and out with no problem. The worst part was sitting by a bunch of screaming grandmas and preteens. What is up with that?

DB: Does Apolo have a girlfriend?
BP: I think not. And if he did, he would not be so public about it — for her own safety.

DB: Why does Apolo wear two wedding rings on his right hand?
BP: One for the good times the other for bad times. Like most Asians, he has the yin-yang thing going. But for the most part . . . I have no idea. He’s a trendsetter. What can you say?

DB: If you could give Apolo one piece of advice, what would it be?
BP: It’s no pain, it’s no strain, just sit down and let it drain!

DB: Who’s your daddy?
BP: One of my grandfather’s sons. Your trick question gets my trick answer! Ha-ha!

DB: Is it true you were given one of the beta versions of the new Apolo Beanie Baby?
BP: We do have an Apolo doll. As a beta version, it is still a work in progress, but I can tell you it’s getting there. Just as a teaser: it does have moving parts and is anatomically correct.

DB: In all the upcoming Apolo biographies about to hit bookstores, what is going to be the one suspiciously missing bit of information?
BP: The locker room incident with one of the international skaters

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