7-19 It's Just Like Riding A Bike
Original Airdate: 24 Apr 2007
Written By Jennie Snyder
LUKE'S DINER
[Lorelai waits for a minute outside before entering, Babette and Miss
Patty are surprised to see Lorelai.]
LORELAI: Hey [Chuckles to Kirk
as she sits at the counter]
KIRK: Well, well, well I
always suspected this day would come.
LORELAI: Hi Kirk.
KIRK: You’re not getting
this seat back.
LORELAI: Huh?
KIRK: You can’t, it’s mine
now and frankly I can see why you hogged it for so long.
LORELAI: What?
KIRK: It’s clearly the best
stool in the joint. Close to the cash register and the kitchen, which
guarantees plenty of face time with the boss. Climate wise it’s
positioned between two air-conditioning vents which creates a nice cross
ventilation….
LORELAI: Hey Kirk…
KIRK: …never.
LORELAI: You can have the
seat. Hey [To Luke]
LUKE: Hey. [Short pause]
Coffee?
LORELAI: Yes please.
LUKE: All right, ah to stay or
to go?
LORELAI: Um… To stay.
LUKE: Good, okay.
MISS PATTY: Lorelai.
BABETTE: Hi ya doll.
LORELAI: Hey.
MISS PATTY: It’s so nice
seeing you back in here.
LORELAI: Thanks.
BABETTE: Been a long time.
LORELAI: Yah.
BABETTE: What nine, ten
months.
LORELAI: Something like that.
KIRK: Actually I can tell you
exactly when Lorelai was in her last ‘cause I marked it in my
calendar. [Looks it up] “May 22, 2006, stool available?” it’s
important to…
LUKE: Enough Kirk, here you
go.
LORELAI: Thank you. [Exhales]
So how’s it going?
LORELAI: Oh really well. The
inn is really busy.
LUKE: Yeah I’ll bet.
LORELAI: And so how are you
doing.
LUKE: Me? Good, really good.
[Still awkward between them]
LORELAI: Good.
LUKE: Yeah.
LORELAI: Um, it sure is warm
outside.
LUKE: Yeah you know when I
opened the diner this morning I remember thinking how warm it was.
LORELAI: Really!
LUKE: Yeah.
LORELAI: You know what maybe I
should take this to go. To get back to work and….
LUKE: Yeah okay let me just
get you a cup.
LORELAI: It’s been really
busy at the Inn.
LUKE: Yeah. Yeah you said.
There you go.
[Lorelai pours the coffee into
the to go cup and Luke puts a lid on it.]
LUKE: Lid on there.
LORELAI: Oh great.
[Lorelai gets money to pay]
LUKE: Nah, I got it.
LORELAI: Thanks.
LUKE: Okay so I’ll see you
around.
LORELAI: Definitely, I’ll
see you around. Okay.
[Lorelai starts to leave the
diner.]
LORELAI: Bye.
MISS PATTY: Bye.
[Outside Lorelai exhales in
relief.]
OPENING CREDITS
UNKNOWN ROAD
[Lorelai is driving the Jeep. Her cell phone rings]
LORELAI: Hi.
SOOKIE: Shh! Shh! Shh! Shh!
LORELAI: You called me.
SOOKIE: Oh, no, not you. I was
talking to Davey. Hey.
LORELAI: Hey.
SOOKIE: I was just calling to
let you know I'm not coming into work today. [To Davey] No, no, no, no,
no itching. No itching. Just pat, pat. Pat, pat.
LORELAI: Is everything okay?
SOOKIE: Oh, everything's fine.
I just hate that stupid Rosie Milano.
LORELAI: Ugh, is she the woman
at Davey's school with the big, fake boobs who all the dads think are
real?
SOOKIE: No, but I hate her,
too. Rosie Milano is a little girl in Davey's class.
LORELAI: Oh. Interesting
choice for your nemesis.
SOOKIE: She came to school
with the chicken pox.
LORELAI: Oh, no, I hate her,
too. Davey and Martha?
SOOKIE: Yeah. I mean, not
terrible cases. They've both been vaccinated, but I'm up to my ears in
oatmeal baths. Plus I've got to find a hotel for Jackson because the inn
is completely full -- "go, us," by the way.
LORELAI: Why does Jackson need
to stay in a hotel?
SOOKIE: He's never had the
chicken pox. I mean I know he's already been exposed, so he may get them
anyway, but if there's a chance in hell to avoid him getting them, I'm
gonna do it because that man is a huge baby.
LORELAI: Well he doesn’t
need to stay at a hotel, he can just stay at my place.
SOOKIE: Lorelai, you are my
best friend in the entire world. I could not sic Jackson on you.
LORELAI: Oh, please.
SOOKIE: No, the man's a slob.
This morning, I could have killed him, with the wet towels all over the
floor.
LORELAI: It's so not a big
deal. Why waste money on a hotel?
SOOKIE: Are you sure?
LORELAI: Yes. Please, end of
discussion. He's staying with me.
SOOKIE: Okay, well, thank you,
and I want you to remember this moment because you offered.
LORELAI: Okay, well...
SOOKIE: Okay. Well, I'm gonna
pick him up and bring him over to you around six.
LORELAI: Yeah, that sounds
good. Hey, so I went into Luke's this morning.
SOOKIE: What? Why didn't you
cut me off? It's not like the kids have bubonic plague. How did it go?
LORELAI: It was awful.
SOOKIE: Oh!
LORELAI: Yeah everybody was
staring at us.
SOOKIE: Oh, I'm sure they
weren't.
LORELAI: Sookie.
SOOKIE: Yeah, they were
staring.
LORELAI: Yeah it was just
awkward, and neither of us knew how to act.
SOOKIE: I'm sure it seemed
worse than it really was.
LORELAI: Uh, no. We hit the
weather in the first minute.
SOOKIE: Ohh. Well, it has been
unseasonably warm, but you know things will get better.
LORELAI: I don't know. Maybe
there's just too much history.
SOOKIE: Oh, history,
schmistory. Couples have been breaking up and becoming friends. I mean
look at Ryan O'Neal and Farrah Fawcett, huh?
LORELAI: Really Ryan and
Fawcett that's the most well-adjusted relationship you can come up with?
SOOKIE: I mean I'm sorry. He's
been in the news lately -- that whole shooting-a-gun-at-his-son thing.
LORELAI: Hey, S-- oh! God.
[The Jeep starts making
unusual sounds]
SOOKIE: What was that?
LORELAI: I don't know.
SOOKIE: Oh!
LORELAI: Oh! It's coming from
my car.
SOOKIE: Pull over.
LORELAI: I am.
SOOKIE: Pull over! Pull over!
Pull over!
LORELAI: I am. I am. I-I've
pulled over. Hold on. I'm turning it off.
SOOKIE: Are you okay?
LORELAI: Yeah, I think so.
SOOKIE: Well, what was that?
LORELAI: You know, the
carburetor?
SOOKIE: Oh. Ooh, or maybe the
alternator.
LORELAI: I think I better call
Gypsy.
SOOKIE: That's probably a good
idea.
LORELAI: Okay, bye.
SOOKIE: Bye.
[The brake lights on the jeep
flicker and go out]
PARIS AND DOYLE’S APARTMENT.
[Paris is sitting at the table when the front door opens.]
PARIS: Finally. Doyle, she's
here! Where were you? Your "20th Century Poets" class ended
two hours ago.
DOYLE: Hey, Rory.
RORY: Hey, Doyle. I was just
dropping Logan off at the airport.
DOYLE: Oh yeah he has that
meeting in San Fran. When is it?
RORY: Tomorrow afternoon.
DOYLE: Wish him luck for me.
RORY: I will.
PARIS: Seriously, you're gonna
stand here making idle chitchat on the single most important day of my
life?
DOYLE: Sorry, Sweetie. Paris
has some news.
PARIS: Not some news, The
News. Responses from Harvard Medical School, Johns Hopkins School of
Medicine, Penn Medical, Yale Law School, Stanford Law School, and
Columbia Medical. And before you comment on envelope thickness, keep in
mind that so much stuff is online these days that thickness is no longer
an accurate indicator.
RORY: Mm-hmm
PARIS: I knew you would want
to be here, when I opened them.
RORY: Yeah, right. Thanks.
DOYLE: Go on, Hon. Do it!
PARIS: [Sighs] Okay. My lucky
letter opener. Used it to open the envelope conveying my acceptance to
Yale four years ago. And don't look at me like I'm some kind of
superstitious freak. It's just a precautionary device. If it works,
great. If not, I need it to open letters anyway. I don't know which to
open first. Choose one.
RORY: Okay, uh... Yale Law
School.
PARIS: Yale Law School. Okay,
wow. That's a great school. I'd be lucky to get in there, you know? You
open it.
RORY: Me?
PARIS: You're lucky.
RORY: I am?
PARIS: How else do you explain
the fact that you got into Harvard and I didn't?
RORY: Oh, right, luck. Okay.
PARIS: Use the letter opener!
RORY: Oh. Are you sure the
letter opener's luck isn't gonna cancel out my luck?
PARIS: I don’t know, is that
how it works?
RORY: I was kidding. Sorry.
Here we go. All right. "Dear Paris Geller, we are pleased to inform
you --"
PARIS: I got in! Whoo!
[Paris and Doyle screaming]
RORY: Congratulations! I'm so
happy for you.
PARIS: Thank you. Thank you so
much for your participation in Operation Finish Line, for your
friendship, for everything. You've always been an inspiration to me,
Rory Gilmore.
RORY: Aw.
PARIS: I mean, the way you cut
your ruthless path to the head of the Yale Daily News and never looked
back -- I never told you, but I really admired that.
RORY: Thanks?
PARIS: And, Doyle, I know this
process didn't exactly bring out my soft and fuzzy side.
DOYLE: Doesn't matter. I love
you, Baby, and I am so proud of you.
PARIS: I love you, too. I just
can't believe I got into the second best law school in the country. It's
such an honor! It doesn't matter really if I get into the others. I have
a great option right here.
RORY: You do.
PARIS: Yeah! Anyway, go ahead.
Might as well open Harvard, even though it doesn't matter. Use the
letter opener again.
RORY: Okay. [opens the letter]
Okay. "We are pleased to inform…"
PARIS: Whoo! [Very excited
again] I got in! I got in!
DOYLE: All right!
RORY: Congratulations!
PARIS: Bite me, Harvard, bite
me!
DOYLE: Yeah, choke on it!
PARIS: I'm tempted to reject
them the same way they rejected me that dark day four years ago. Who's
laughing now?!
RORY: Okay, um, so, next we
have, what? The University of Pennsylvania? All right. Let's see what it
says. [Chuckles] All right. "We are pleased to inform…"
PARIS: In? I'm in? Yes!
[Excited but a little less
than before]
DOYLE: Oh!
PARIS: What's that about?
RORY: Hmm?
PARIS: Your noticeable
drop-off in enthusiasm. Is that a reflection of the fact that you're
less impressed by my admission to the University of Pennsylvania School
of Medicine than you were by my other acceptances?
RORY: I'd say we're just as
impressed. Wouldn't you, Doyle?
DOYLE: Oh, absolutely. Because
it's a pre-eminent institution in the interrelated disciplines of
patient-care education and research.
RORY: It's a great school.
DOYLE: Mm, top-notch.
PARIS: Fine, you've made your
point. Perception should play a role in my decision-making process.
RORY: Well I guess that's what
Doyle and I were saying.
PARIS: I mean lets face it,
you say "Harvard Medical School," and people are automatically
impressed, and that counts for something.
RORY: That's true.
PARIS: SO you think I should
go there?
RORY: Oh, well, that's not
what I'm saying -- or that you shouldn't. I’m just... What I'm saying
is that you have all these great options.
DOYLE: Yeah.
PARIS: I know. So, how do I
decide?
DOYLE: Oh, you'll figure it
out, Hon.
PARIS: How? This is a huge
decision, the biggest decision I've had to make in my life. Law school
or med school? I have two passions, and obviously, I'm vastly talented
in both fields. What muse do I follow? Not to mention location-wise,
where do I want to live for the next three or up to eight years? Open
the others.
RORY: Yeah? Okay. Columbia.
DOYLE: [Chuckles]
RORY: Also a good school.
DOYLE: Mm-hmm.
RORY: "We are
pleased…"
PARIS: Oh, god!
RORY: Paris you're just being
silly, okay? It's good to have options.
PARIS: Yeah right you can say
that because there's only one thing you want. Talk to me if you don't
get the New York Times Fellowship and you have to choose between six
other papers.
[Rory looks hurt]
PARIS: I'm sorry. I just meant
it must be nice to know what you want.
RORY: Well, "nice"
-- yeah, that's one way to put it, and "scary" is another.
PARIS: You have a great shot
at the Reston.
DOYLE: You do and with A.J.
Abrams writing that rec.…
RORY: Well I'm sure all the
candidates have great recommendations.
PARIS: New York Times would be
lucky to have you.
RORY: Thanks. Well, I'll find
out soon enough, but come on. This is your moment. Should we open
another one? All right. [Opens letter] Hey, hey. You got into Stanford!
DOYLE: Whoa! Someone's on a
roll!
RORY: Yay!
PARIS: Enough with the
hysterics. I have a big decision to make, and all this hooting and
hollering isn't exactly helping matters.
[Paris buries her head in a
pillow on the couch]
LORELAI'S HOUSE
[Lorelai’s on the phone, the doorbell rings, talking on the phone
while answering the door]
LORELAI: What do you mean you
can't fix it, gypsy? It's only eight years old. [To Sookie and Jackson]
Hi, come on in. Everyone knows you can fix anything. Sit down. Sorry I
have guests, make yourselves at home okay.
SOOKIE: Unh-unh-unh-unh.
JACKSON: Wha…
SOOKIE: Ignore Lorelai.
JACKSON: What?
SOOKIE: You are absolutely not
to make yourself at home, don't leave your clothes lying all over the
house.
JACKSON: I won't.
SOOKIE: Wipe your shoes off if
you go outside and come back in.
JACKSON: I will. Don't leave
them laying around in the middle of the room or anywhere where they can
be smelled.
JACKSON: Sookie.
SOOKIE: Just don't touch
anything, and hang up your wet towels.
JACKSON: I have stayed at
other people's houses before.
SOOKIE: I know. Why do you
think I'm saying all of this? And just try not to annoy Lorelai.
JACKSON: Believe it or not, I
don't try to annoy other people.
SOOKIE: Well congratulations,
because you have a natural talent.
JACKSON: Sookie!
SOOKIE: What?
JACKSON: Nothing. Is that all?
SOOKIE: No, I packed you a
salad. Eat it in the kitchen at the table on a plate. Please do not make
a mess. I wanted to stay around and say thank you to Lorelai, but I
should get back to the kids.
JACKSON: Yeah, yeah you should
get back to the kids. It sounded like that's gonna take a while.
SOOKIE: Really?
JACKSON: Oh, yeah. They're
talking about cars. I mean that phone call could take hours. Go, really.
SOOKIE: Well call me if you
need anything.
JACKSON: I will.
SOOKIE: And don't use
Lorelai's home phone.
JACKSON: Kiss the kids good
night for me.
SOOKIE: I will.
LORELAI: Thanks for trying.
Okay. Thank you. Bye. [Sookie leaves just as Lorelai returns from the
kitchen] Sorry about that.
JACKSON: Oh! No problem.
Thanks again for letting me stay.
LORELAI: Oh, sure, my
pleasure. Have a seat. [Hesitating to sit] So, where's Sookie?
JACKSON: Oh you know she had
to get back to the kids.
LORELAI: Oh. Well, how's she
holding up?
JACKSON: O-okay. A little
tense. What's going on with the car?
LORELAI: Gypsy says I have to
put it down.
JACKSON: What?
LORELAI: Yes. She said it
would be cheaper to get a new one. She used the phrase "total
internal destruction."
JACKSON: Wow.
LORELAI: I know. I guess that
check-engine light is not just a suggestion.
JACKSON: Not so much.
LORELAI: Although I'm proud.
Total internal destruction -- that sounds bad ass.
JACKSON: So what's next?
LORELAI: Uh, I guess I turn my
evil power on some new, unsuspecting vehicle.
JACKSON: Do you know what
you're gonna get?
LORELAI: No. Any suggestions?
JACKSON: Honestly, I'm not a
car guy, but I can steer you toward a good tractor.