Title: It was a dark and stormy night
Author: RabidX (rabid_x@yahoo.com)
________________________________________
It was a dark and stormy night 4 - Of Ice and Men...
By RabidX
<This is how it starts. This is how one's carefully constructed fantasy of life falls down around one's ears.> Bobby thought.
He sat in his dark room, smoking. New habit, one picked up a couple of months ago on a whim. He walked into a 7-11 to get a Big Gulp and walked out with it and a pack of smokes. All part of his new carefully constructed life. Always the Joker, but never really taking risks. Not this big ones. Not the ones that counted.
So he decided to say 'fuck it!' and do all the things he had be too afraid to do. Daredevil Drake. Pushing it to the limit. Flying higher, making bigger leaps, trying it all.
"What a load of bullshit!" he said outloud, vaguely surprised to hear the bitterness in his own voice.
The one, the main, the really huge thing he was building up to, was telling Remy LeBeau he liked, maybe even loved, him. Fat fucking chance there now. That house of cards came crashing down hours ago, when he found Remy wrapped up in some kid.
<Now, now, Robert, be fair. He is chronologically not that far from you.> said his Hanknag Voice.
"Shut up." he grumbled.
A few stolen kisses, smoldering looks, one very sweaty night, and awkward retreats. That's what his encounters with Remy had been so far. He had been the one to run. Confused, excited and scared. With no idea what to do, or how to react. No wonder Remy had stopped trying. Must have been frustrating for the Cajun. After all, everyone wanted him.
<Yup, even me.>
Bobby hung his head and tried hard not to cry. It would have been stupid to do so. Not like he and Remy had anything but those few encounters... and that one night. But they had been oh so real to Bobby. Just must not have been to Remy.
And now, now this... this Brit, this boy, had taken a place in Remy's heart. Kinda hard not to tell. All the macho posturing pouring off of him when he helped Remy off the bathroom floor. The 'You Die Now' glare he had given Bobby. The solicitous way Remy had clung to him. Looked at him.
<Man am I a jerk or what?>
Remy had been hurt, was sick. And he just Bevised and Buttheaded along, hadn't he? He wouldn't really tell anyone. He had stammered an apology when he saw how terrible Remy looked. Remy told him what had happened out at the ridge. He tried to thank, to congratulate, Jono on a job well done. It was met with a flat, dark stare.
<He's a jerk too.>
And so Bobby had retreated to his room. To sit. In the dark. Alone. And brood. Again. Great.
~~
Jono bundled Remy up in bed after Bobby left. Remy looked terrible, but kept saying he felt much better. Jono didn't buy it for one bit. Remy was hurt, sick and upset. Even more so now that The X-Jerk was home.
<If 'e open's that big mouth before Remy is ready to tell everyone about us, I'll blast it right th' 'ell off of 'im!>
"Cher, don' be so hard on Bobby. He didn't know what was goin' on." Remy mumbled from deep in the covers.~Well 'e bloody coulda looked first!~ Jono snarled.
Remy curled up tighter. Jono's anger was almost touchable. It was making his head hurt worse. Why did Bobby have to show up right when he did? And say such stupid Bobby things? Remy liked Bobby. Had even wanted to see if there could have been something there. And finally, one night, he and Bobby had done it. All of it. But when he had made moves again, Bobby had run. Remy had understood. Bobby had been confused, upset, not quite ready to
admit what had happened. Remy understood and backed off. But it had hurt.
Jono sighed to himself. He knew he needed to get a grip on how he felt. Remy was obviously having a hard time dealing with it. He calmed himself down and wrapped his body around Remy's. Remy sighed in relief.The Next Day....
Remy awoke to a blinding light. Sun was streaming through the windows. The rain had finally passed. He untangled himself from Jono and pulled the curtains shut. As his eyes readjusted, he watched Jono toss himself around the bed. No wonder the young man's hair was always such a fright! He slid back in bed and Jono
wrapped himself around him. He smiled and stroked the wild mass of dark hair.
~Mrfl~
"Mornin' to you too, cher." Remy whispered in his ear.
~'s quiet.~
"Ouiai, de rain has stopped." Remy snuggled in closer.
~'ow's yer head?~ Jono asked, his 'voice' all sleepy.
"Still nailed on. Want t'sleep more?" Remy asked, hoping so.
Jono nuzzled Remy's chest. ~Yeah. You?~
"You keep dat up an' I'm gonna get all kinds o' other ideas, but oiuia. Could stand t'sleep more." Remy planted a kiss on Jono's forehead and closed his eyes.
~~
Bobby woke, stiff. He had fallen asleep in the chair. Brilliant. He rose, things popping and stretching and staggered to the shower. He flipped the bathroom light on out of habit, before he remembered there wasn't any power. The light came on. He whooped outloud. One night in the dark had been enough for him.
~~
~Wot t'bloody 'ell was that?~ Jono groused.
A warcry of some sort had echoed through the upstairs, waking them both with a jerk. Remy sat up and listened. Jono fumed.
"Sound like Bobby done somet'ing." Remy said.
~Does 'e usually do somethin' so loud?~
Remy nodded. Jono flopped back and put a pillow over his head. Remy shrugged, no other noises coming, and laid back down.
~e's a twit.~
Remy sighed. He jerked the pillow of Jono and stared reproachfully at him. Jono's eyes got all hang-dog.
~Sorry.~
Remy shook his head and pulled Jono upright. "Cher, listen, you don' know Bobby. Ouiai, he can be too much de clown, an' his mout', it gets him into trouble. He is, however, a good friend t' have. He is probably beatin' himself up for las' night. Probably for more dan you know." Remy finished in a whisper.
Jono looked hard at Remy's face. Remy, unable to look at Jono for too long just now, looked down at his hand.
~Yer two used ta 'ave a thing, didn't yer?~
Remy shrugged. "I guess."
Jono's eyebrows shot up. ~Ya' guess? Either yer did or yer didn't.~
Remy gestured helplessly. "We... I... We slept toget'er once. I t'ought maybe der would be more, mais, Bobby... he didn' know w'at he wanted. I t'ink it scared him."
<Yer bastard, yer 'urt Remy.> was all Jono could think. Until... <Rebound? Is that wot's goin' on 'ere?>
~Yer loved 'im?~ Jono asked, searching Remy's face.
Remy shrugged again. He fluttered his hands. "Don' know if I did den. Loved de idea of us, wanted t'see if der was maybe more..."
<The idear. Oh God. Please don't let that be this.> Jono fretted.
"... But he's de one who ran an' so I gave up, n'est pas? It hurt, but it's over."
<Is it? Wish I could buy that one, mate.> Jono began to feel empty as he looked at Remy's face.
Just as they were working things out, being the fucked up bastards they were. How more complicated could it have gotten? Now he knew. Remy still cared for Bobby. He, Jono, was Mr. Rebound. Maybe if Bobby hadn't come back so soon, they could have been on more solid ground. Nope, smug prick had to come back early.
He felt his walls forming back, brick by brick. His shields would come back with them. No sense making things worse for Remy. No sense hurting the man he was starting to love with all that was left of his heart and soul.
"Cher? Where you at?" Remy whispered.
Jono shook himself. ~I'm 'ere. Sorry.~
Remy nodded and reached out to stroke Jono's cheek. Jono let him for a bit, then took Remy's hand and placed it back in Remy's lap. His heart was breaking and he didn't know how much longer he could sit here.
There was a quiet knock on the door. Not loud enough to wake anyone sleeping. A very polite knock. Jono threw himself up out of the bed and wrapped a towel around his waist. No need to guess who it was. He opened the door to find a very sheepish Bobby outside.
"Um... Hi. Sorry if I, uh, woke you guys. Just wanted to tell you the power was back on." Bobby said.
Remy's eyes were downcast, Jono's were guarded. Bobby sighed inwardly. Then Remy smiled.
"T'ank you Bobby. Now I can shower in de light."
"Yeah, um, I'm gonna make some breakfast. You want any?" Bobby asked, and then cursed inwardly. Jono couldn't eat.
"Dat would be nice. I'm gonna take a shower first. Jono...?" Remy said, seeing how tense Jono's back was.
~Yer go ahead. Don't need breakfast. Gonner get my laundry t'gether.~ And with that, he pushed out past Bobby.
Remy looked at Bobby. A mixture of anger, sadness and confusion. Bobby didn't do what he wanted. Take Remy in his arms and make it o.k.
"I'll...um...go. Make breakfast." he said, lamely and walked away.
Remy slowly turned and went to the bathroom. Time reached a crawl for him. The shower got hot slowly. He stood under it, washing slowly. Slowly. Waiting. Hoping. That the door would open and Jono would come in. Or maybe... Bobby?
"Non!" he cursed himself.
There was no reason to dredge up what was past. A missed opportunity. He and Bobby didn't work out. Pure and simple.
<Non non, mon ami. Not dat easy. Didn' have de *chance* t' work out.>
"Arette!" he hissed at himself. No point to this line of thought.
A chance that didn't work ment it didn't work. He had moved on. He had Jono. He wanted Jono.
<An' no mo' wantin' Bobby?>
"I *had* Bobby." he snarled. "He left."
<He jus' wasn't ready.>
"An' it's too late!" He growled and began to wash quickly.
The voice in the back of his mind, The Gotta Question Ev'ryt'ing to Deat' Until You Fuck Up Voice, chuckled.
<But if it's too late, why is Jono runnin'? What does he see?>
~~
Jono slammed clothes into his dufflebag. He was going to do the laundry. His clothes were filthy, all the running around in the rain stuff. And then, when they were all clean... what? Leave? Run away? Nope, been down this road... a week ago.
<Yer gonna do yer laundry. Yer gonna go and 'elp do whatever needs to be done around 'ere. And if Remy wants Bobby... Yer gonna give 'em yer blessing. Ger outta their way. You'll... >
He slumped down on the bed. <I'll die.>
He buried his face in his pillow and cried silently.
~~
Bobby stirred pancake mix. He squeezed oranges for orange juice. He set the table. He flipped the pancakes. He tried very, very hard not to think about his feelings for Remy. He tried to think about Remy's feelings for Jono. And visa versa.
<You had your shot. You blew it. Get over it and get on.>
He sighed. He could do it. It actually couldn't be that hard. Remy was obviously in love with Jono. Therefore, Remy was happy.
<You're supposed to want those you care about to be happy, dammit!>
Yeah, but... But. The word that changed every sentence it was in. 'Yeah, you look nice, but...'. The but made the nice go away. This but made the happy-for-Remy go away. But why couldn't Remy be happy with him?
"Because he's not." he whispered.
<Could be.>
"No."
<Aw, c'mon! You've done nothing but think about him since... >
"Since I RAN away from him."
And there it was. He ran from Remy. If he had cared so much then, why did he run? That fantasy about being together was just that...a fantasy. One that was nice to masturbate to, but wasn't reality, was it?
He sighed. O.K. So he could be happy for Remy's happy. He probed that thought. Poked it from all sides. Then a big grin spread over his face. Yeah, he could be. And, when the time was right, he could tease the lovers. When it was right. And maybe, when it was right, he'd find someone too.
~~
The Massachusetts Academy
"He's what?" Angelo asked, a look of surprise on his face.
"He's going to be training with the X-Men from now on." Emma said.
Angelo had been the first student back. He really didn't like the breaks anyways. He couldn't go home. The gangs would know he wasn't dead. He'd spent some time with Jubes and Logan. Boring and somewhat painful. He'd spent some time with Ev. Just boring. He'd come back early, hoping to stir up something with Jono.
"Damn! Vato coulda tole me!" he griped.
Emma shuffled papers and looked at him over their tops. "Well, it was a big decision for him. I'm sure he'll be in
touch."
Angelo waved a hand. "He better, or I'll go find him."
Emma made a noise of no real belief and opened a very official looking letter. From Monaco. She scanned it.
"Well shit." she said, in a proper, clipped voice.
Angelo stared. Must be bad news if Emma cursed.
"Si?" he encouraged.
Emma waved a hand distractedly. "Monet says she isn't coming back."
Angelo raised one eyebrow. "And...?"
"And her father would like me to come and talk with her." Emma said, sighing. Her fingers squeezed the sides of her nose.
"So go an' talk to her. Wish you wouldn't but... hey. Your call."
Emma glared at him. "And what, do you propose, I do with you?"
Angelo shrugged. "I got more vacation time. Maybe I'll go visit Jono."
"Just stay out of trouble."
Angelo grinned.
~~~
Bobby and Remy ate in silence. Bobby could tell Remy was deep in thought. He could feel the glances those crimson and jet eyes were giving him. When he caught Remy at one, Remy had quickly
looked away.
<Screw this!>
"Remy, we need to talk."
Remy put his fork down and nodded, mutely. He waited for Bobby to start. Bobby coughed. He hemmed and hawed a bit. He... lit a cigarette?
Remy raised an eyebrow. Bobby just shrugged and handed Remy one.
"You two look um... happy together." Bobby began. "At least you seemed to be. Until I showed up."
Remy sparked his smoke alight and exhaled a long plume of smoke >from his nose. He stared at it.
"Look, I'm sorry for my bad timing and my big mouth." Bobby said, worried at the silence.
Remy looked at him. "You ever t'ink about what happened wit' us?"
Bobby gulped. "Yeah. All the time. I spent the past two months thinking about it."
"And?"
"And I... I was coming back to apologize for running. To see if...ah... to see if you still wanted me." Bobby said, starting to feel miserable. "But I can see how much you and Jono care about each other! And I am cool with that."
Remy flicked ashes on his plate. Bobby cringed. He looked angry.
"You're... cool wit' dat." Remy breathed in deep when Bobby nodded.
"Are... are you?" Bobby stammered. "Have I fucked something up bad?"
Remy shrugged. "Don' know. Why did you run?"
It was Bobby's turn to shrug. "I was... scared. I mean, I was barely out of the closet. I didn't know what I wanted. Or who."
"But you were hopin' dat I still wanted you?" Remy said, with a voice filled with ice.
"I know...stupid huh?" Bobby said, knowing it was lame at best.
"Ouiai, you got dat right! You were hopin' dat I was jus' pinin' away. Waitin' fer you t' come back t' me!" Remy said, his voice raising. "Der was a time I woulda killed for a kind word from you! Dat I would have gladly sold my soul... again... t' make you happy!"
"I know." Bobby whispered.
"Oh you know dat, do you?" Remy all but roared. "Well nice way ya had of showin' me! Leavin'!"
"Remy, don't you know that if I could, I'd take it all back? That I would have stayed? I. Was. A. Fool. To throw you away like that." Bobby said. "But, hey, it wasn't ment to be was it? Not like you came after me did you?"
Remy blinked.
"There was a time *I* would have killed to see you walk in the door of my parent's house! You *knew* where I was! You *knew* what I was going through! You even said 'Take time, Bobby.' And I did, dammit!" Bobby yelled. "And... and I had a nice, little, safe fucking fantasy about how I would come back and we would work it out. But it was just that, wasn't it? A fantasy. I know that. *You* know that! So stop blaming it all fucking on me!"
Bobby stood. "If you were so fucking in love with me, then you wouldn't have fallen for Jono, you stupid prick!" And with that, he stormed out.
Remy sat, stunned in the silence.
~~
Bobby stormed upstairs. He knew Jono hadn't gone to do laundry. He would have had to pass them in the kitchen. They'd gotten rid of the upstairs laundry room a few mansion demolition's ago. He pounded on Jono's door. Nothing. He pounded again.
"Dammit Jono! Open up! You and I are gonna talk!" he shouted through the door. Nothing. "Fine! I'm coming in!"
He tried the door. It was locked. He smiled and froze the lock. One jerk and it was open.
No Jono. "Shit."
Then he heard the water from the bathroom. Whoops. Then he heard a thump. He knew that kind of thump. He made that kind of thump when he punched the wall. Hell, he even ran the water so noone would hear. He marched over and flung open the bathroom door.
Jono was curled up tight in one corner. There were shards of broken glass from the shattered mirror everywhere. He moved quickly over to Jono, hoping he hadn't done something crazy. Kneeling down, he saw that Jono's knuckles, on hands white and wrapped around his knees, were scraped up. There was a very sluggish flow of blood from them. There were smears of it on the wall as well.
<At least it's not the wrists.>
"Jono." he said, quietly, and put a hand on one shoulder.
Jono flinched but looked up. His dark eyes were overflowing with tears. Why was Bobby here?
~Come ter rub it in then?~
Bobby frowned. "No, actually. I came to see how you were."
~Piss off.~
"Well, while we *are* in the bathroom, I don't need to piss." Bobby quipped. "Now come on. Get up."
Jono wiped at his nose and glared. ~Why?~
"Because we need to talk." Jono glared more. "It will be a good talk." And Bobby stood and offered Jono his hand.
Jono stared at it, like it would bite. Then he slowly uncurled and let Bobby help him up and into the bedroom.
<Geeze, he's light!> Bobby thought.
~Wot'er yer want t'say?~ Jono snarled, collapsing on his bed.
"I want to say that I am sorry. Big mouth and bad timing. My trademarks." Bobby started. He saw the ashtray and lit a smoke.
<Lung Cancer Express, here I come!>
He flopped down on the floor in front of Jono. "Look, I would like to be honest with you. Can I?"
Jono eyeballed him warily, but nodded.
"Good. I shall try to be brief and blunt. Remy and I slept together once. He wanted more. I ran. Didn't know what I wanted. Thought about it for a couple of months. Came back, hoping to maybe start it again." Jono's eyes narrowed. "Lemme finish. I was wrong. We can't go back. We aren't right together. You guys are. Remy loves you. You love him. I'm not blind. And I'm not here to steal him away. There."
Jono just looked.
"So... I've said my piece. Now maybe you two will stop being morons and get on with your relationship." Bobby stood and walked to the door.
~Thank you.~ Jono said.
Bobby turned and smiled. "You're welcome. Now get your hand fixed."
Bobby walked a few doors down to his room. He flopped down on the bed and stared at the ceiling. He burst into tears.
~~
Remy walked quietly to his room. Through the open bathroom door, he saw Jono. Cleaning up glass with a bandaged hand. He was to Jono's side in a flash.
"Cher, what did you do?" he cried, taking the wounded hand carefully.
~I, er, broke th' mirror.~ Jono shuffled his feet.
"Petit! Why?" Remy said, forcing Jono's head up with his other hand.
~Didn't wanna look at meself anymore. Too ugly.~
Remy searched Jono's face. His eyes were red from crying. Remy pushed yet another stray lock of dark hair off his forehead.
"Non, you're not ugly. Your eyes alone are de most gorgeous t'ings I have eva seen. I love dem. I love you." Remy said, and kissed Jono's bandaged hand. "Don' eva doubt dat."
Jono thought his knees would collapse on him. ~I love you too, Remy.~
They stood, like lovers dancing, amid the broken glass. Just staring into each other's eyes. Finally, Remy smiled.
"Lemme help you clean dis up."
Jono blushed. ~I made th' mess...~
"Shush. I did too." Remy said, stooping and cleaning.
In very little time, they had removed all the glass. Remy said something about stealing another mirror from another bathroom. Jono blushed. Remy just kissed his head.
"Dat can wait." He said and led Jono into his room.
He held Jono close, his arms wrapped tight around his body. Jono clung to him, buring his face in Remy's chest. Remy's long fingers stroked his back, his arms. Jono shivered. Remy nuzzled his ear.
"Lay with me?" Remy asked, just like the first night, and kissed Jono's palm, just like then.
~Yes.~ Jono whispered, just like then.
Remy led him to the bed. Slowly, with utmost care, Remy undressed Jono. He ran his hands over Jono's flat stomach and up his arms. Jono's eyes crinkled and he pulled Remy's clothes off, trying to match the tenderness Remy used. Remy shuddered as Jono's hands brushed his nipples.
They knelt on the bed, facing each other. Fingers intertwined, chests touching, they moved slowly together. Remy's lips trailed fire over Jono's brow, eyes and cheeks. Jono moaned and leaned in closer. He nuzzled Remy's neck and ears with his forehead and nose. Remy laid his head on Jono's shoulder.
Jono let go of Remy's hands and wrapped one arm around his shoulders, holding him tight. The other he rubbed and flicked down Remy's body. He twirled the hard points of Remy's nipples, making him gasp. He scratched the fine lines of Remy's stomach with his nails, drawing a sharp inhale. He traced the underside of Remy's erection, making him moan. He wrapped his hand around it and began to stroke with firm, slow strokes, making Remy cry out and dug his nails into the small of Jono's back.
~That's it Remy. Gonna stroke you till you cum.~ he rasped.
"Aaaahh! Oh cher! But I wanna cum in you! Wanna make..."
~Ssshhhh. Lemme do this. Want you t' know, t' feel, 'ow much you mean to me.~
Remy nodded, hair falling into his face. He tossed it back as Jono stroked a little faster. Jono studied the ecstatic expression on Remy's face. Eyes closed, lips bitten, then open, gasping, nostrils flaring, red-gold hair framing, clinging to the long neck. Sweaty and completely beautiful.
Remy couldn't hold it any longer. He chanted Jono's name over and over, louder and louder, until he came. Came hard, screaming Jono's name.
Jono held him tight, not letting him fall. He petted Remy's hair and softly cooed to him. When his arms began to shake, he laid Remy back down on the bed. Remy wrapped himself around Jono.
"Mmmm. Dat was... " he trailed off and kissed Jono's bandaged face.
"But you cher," Remy brushed Jono's erect cock with a hand. "Are still in need."
He pushed Jono over onto his back and began to caress him. He leaned over and followed the path of his hands with the tip of his tongue. A brush on the inside of one arm, a wet nipping close behind. Gooseflesh rose on that sensitive spot. Remy sucked harder, making it red, marking Jono. He traced the rim of Jono's navel with a wet flick. He nibbled the dark path of hair from it. His hands scratched light pathways up the inside of Jono's thighs. Jono
squirmed and his moans ran through Remy, making him hard again.
He licked Jono's weeping cock, tonguing the slit. His hands massaged tight balls and then slid behind them. He teased the tight opening there. Jono bucked and begged.
~Please!~
"Please what, cher?" Remy drawled, breathing hot against Jono's balls.
~Anything!~
Remy licked up Jono's cock. "Tell me." He licked again.
~Fuck me!~ Jono gasped.
"Dat I can do." Remy said and slid his tongue down and into Jono.
He tongue fucked Jono, holding his hips so he didn't squirm away. Jono begged, he sobbed, he shuddered. And then the tongue was gone. Jono's eyes flew open and saw Remy kneeling between his legs, gazing at him with nothing but love.
Jono nodded and Remy pushed slowly into him. Jono pulled his legs up and over Remy's shoulders, allowing him to go deeper. His eyes rolled back in his head as Remy's first thrust hit his prostate. Remy thrust again.
~Remy!~
~Love. Love you Jono.~
Warm and slow, like molasses, Remy's mind filled Jono's. Jono sobbed and again, their hands twined. Moving, gasping, *reaching*, thrust after thrust. Friction of Remy's belly on Jono's hardness. Aching, needing so much. Remy released one of Jono's hands and grabbed both thin wrists in one. His free hand he wrapped around
Jono's erection and moved it with his thrusts. Jono tossed his head >from side to side. Yes, yesssss.
~Jono.~
He lost tract of who was who and what was what. Only love, ecstacy, Nirvana, Remy, filled his mind.
~Mine~
~Yours~
~Yessss~
It didn't matter who thought what, it was all the same. One mind, body, fire-flooded feelings, burning them both.
Jono came, with a voice that roared in Remy's mind. Stars exploded behind his eyes when he came, they came. Endless and ever.
~Don't go.~
~I'm not. I can't. I won't.~
~Ohhh.....~
Later, forever later it seemed, Remy rolled over and pulled Jono up on his chest. Hands fluttered over bodies, grounding, gathering each other back. Bringing it back to center.
~Je' t'aime~
~I love you~