Date:                7 September 2003

Title:                 Heaven from here

Author: Das Jessy

Archive:            'Kay, but tell me.

Summary:            *blech*

Raiting: PG-13

Category:            Spike- POV, song- fic

Disclaimer:            Buffy and Spike are mine and Robbie Williams and Heaven from here                                         are mine.

                        Everything's mine. *grin*

Spoiler:            Between Dead Things and As You Where. Could be around                   

Older and Far Away

Feedback:            Am addicted to it. jessy_84@t-online.de

Author's Note:            Not really that much to note. This fic is kinda an experiment.                 

 

Heaven from here by Das Jessy~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Know no fear I'll still be here tomorrow

I know it's one of your greatest fears. To fall in love and then be left again. But I won't. I'm neither Angel, nor your father, not Giles and definitely not Captain Cardboard.

Bend my ear I'm not gonna go away

You already told me to go away, more than once. You push me away again and again but I won't ever work. There's nowhere else I'd rather be than with you, no matter if you hate me or love me.

You are love so why do you shed a tear

You are full of love, even your guide told you. You are just too afraid to risk the pain.

You rather push everything away, but I know you, Luv, it hurts you that you can't let yourself love it huts you so much that you just draw back even more.

Know no fear we will see heaven from here

If you'd just let me in, I grant you I'd show you a part of heaven, a part of what you've lost when they pulled you out of there.  I'd do everything for you, fulfill your every wish if you'd just let me try. For real.

 

I'll shelter you make it all right to cry

When you just came back I was the one you could cry with, talk to. You knew I'd never hold it against you. I know your strength and I'd never think less of you because you'd show weakness. Your friends, well they only see the tough Slayer. Don't get me wrong, they are good friends, you'd probably have been dead a long time ago if not for them, but you never were able to show them that there's another side to you, a side that is afraid, a side that can't deal with all the things that is life. Me, you showed this side, so when you tell me don't trust me, I know it's a lie because you already trusted me with the second best guarded part of you, your weakness and I cannot help hoping that someday you'll trust me with the best guarded part, your heart.

And you'll help too 'cos the faith in myself

has run dry

I tried and tried to make you happy again, to get the Buffy back I fell in love with. But now I think that I just cannot do it, I can't help you find your happiness if you don't want to get it back. I'm not able to claim your life back for you. I can help but you have to do the greatest part yourself. I don't believe in myself to show you the good sides of life on my own. You have to look for them.

We are love and I just wanna hold you near

I know that you feel for me, I saw it in your eyes. I don't need to hear it, yet, but I want you to be able to come to me, to let me hug you, when you need  comfort.

Know no fear we will see heaven from here

If you'd just let me try, let us try together, we could build ourt own little heaven.

A place where we were warm, loved and finished. A place where neither you nor me would have to be alone. I want that for you just as much as I want it for me.

One day you'll go back to the place you were torn out of and I will go to hell. You're the closest I'll ever be to heaven and I just want us to try to have that, even if it is only for a little while.

 

I see real love in your eyes

No matter how much you try to hide it. From your friends, your sister, your watcher, from me and especially from yourself, I can see it is there. I don't actally know if it is love that I see in your eyes but it has the potential to be something, something big.

And it fills me up when you start to cry

When I see you like this, so out of place, taking everything out on me, I just love you more, because I know that everything here is too much for you and I just want to help you. And if it helps you to beat the crap out of me, so will it be.

 

I just wanna hold you near

I wanna hold you in my arms and take your pain away from you and carry the weight of the world myself.

We will see heaven from here

If you'd let me do that, treat you as I want to, it would bring heaven a little bit closer.

 

Well it all seems out of reach

When I see how you draw back. Everyday a little more, my hope is dying that you'll ever be happy again that you'll ever again say that it's good to be alive. This hope, that I don't wanna lose.

I will take the blame if it keeps the peace

But I will take everything you dish out  if it just helps you the littlest bit.

I love you so much that I'll even let you destroy me before you destroy yourself.

My shelf life's short

Wish they'd make it more easy to follow

It would be so much easier to help you if you'd just let me and not kept pushing me out of your life and then coming back when you've got an itch you can't scratch.

And I've been caught with nothing but

love on my mind

That, I have. More than once. Love's bitch all the way. Your willing slave.

We are love don't let it fall on deaf ears

Listen to your heart, Pet. Give what we have a chance and it can be something really good, let yourself feel without being afraid of what others may think of what could happen.

Now, it's clear we have seen heaven from here

Everytime you let me in a little we see a little bit of heaven, we could have it all the way.

Forever.

 

Comments: To my sister whose birthday is tomorrow.

Not beta read.