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(PG-13)
by Delta Story
June 2007
Author's note: This bit of frivolity came out of an on-line discussion begun by a J/Cer who spent $$ for a Chakotay bookmark to go along with her Janeway bookmark... so that Janeway wouldn't be 'lonely'. {bg}
"Hello?"
"Kathryn - is that you?"
"Yes, but I'm stuck and can't seem to move."
"Same here - it's as if the walls have closed in on me."
"Me, too. Let me see if I can scoot up a bit." Rustle, rustle. Splort. "Ahhhh! That's better - at least I got my head out. I can see the top of your head, Chakotay, but nothing else."
"Oh, yeah. Maybe that's why I'm having trouble breathing. Let me see what I can do. Ugnh..." Sprit, spoosh. Pop. "Aha - there you are --- I can see you now!"
"But there's still so much between us." Sigh. "I'm here between" Creak, twist. "Between pages 78 and 79..."
"And I'm..." Squench, slouch, slide. "I'm between pages 342 and 343. So... what do you suggest we do?"
Squiggle. Turn. "Hmmmm. It looks as if this book we're in is on the edge of a nightstand. Perhaps if we could wiggle the book towards the edge..."
"And it would fall, opening up and releasing us! Brilliant idea as always, dear Kathryn."
"But Chakotay - I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to do most of the work, though, as you're the larger and stronger of the two of us."
Twitter of laughter. "You're not getting out of your share that easily - remember, we're bookmarks... the same size!"
"Oh. Yes." Blush. "All right, but we'll have to work something out."
"How about a rocking rhythm? Take turns in leaning and scooting over towards the edge."
"Sounds like a plan. I'll start." Oomph. Push. Grunt. "Your turn, Kathryn."
"Okay." Scrunch. Groan. Wobble. Sigh. "Is this working, Chakotay?"
Twist. Glance. "I think so. It looks like we've managed to move a few millimeters."
Moan. "At this rate, we'll be exhausted by the time we've freed ourselves."
Glint in eyes, lascivious smile. "Don't bet on it!" Wriggle, wrangle, skoosh...
"Chakotay, you're moving faster than me! How...?" Scoot, squiggle, slide.
"Motivation?" Leer, sneer. Glide, rock, paper, scissors, (Ed. Note: Whoops - wrong metaphor!)
"Hmmm. Pretty cocky, aren't you, mister?" Slither, sashay, writhe.
Ungh. "Well, aren't you motivated, too?" Tussle, twist, groan.
"Ummm, yes - but I'm beginning to wonder if our goals might be a bit different." Squeeze, grunt, push, shove.
Laughter. "Oh, come on - admit it, Kathryn! You want it as much as I do!" Thrust, heave, squirm.
"So that's what all of this about?" Slip, slide, glide.
Pant. Groan. Wheeze. "Look - I think we're a bit over the edge! Time to rock and roll and get this plot... er... tome moving!"
"Just need to get that center of gravity shifted over the edge." Roll, twist, turn. "Too bad we aren't made of a heavier weight paper stock."
Gaffaw. "I think that's the first time I've ever heard a woman say she wanted to weigh more!" Squirm, scoot, scuffle.
Stop. Glare. "So now you're trying to change the mood?"
"Aw, Kathryn - you know what I..."
SWOOSH!!!!!
SLAM... SPLORT.
Flitter, flutter. Cough, cough. "Are you all right, Kathryn?" Squiggle, slide. "Yes - whew! It's good to be out from between those pages - I was beginning to feel cramped." Flip flop. "Ah... there you are." Disappointment. "What's the matter?" "You... you just look so... two-dimensional, Chakotay!" Sniff. "Yeah, well that's the way Berman and Braga wanted me to be." Glance, scan. "But you don't look so perky, either." Snivel. "Don't feel alone. How do you think I felt after they brought HER into the picture? Blech!" Turn, toss, plop on top. Paper to paper, surface to surface. "But now we've managed to find a way to be together." Rub, slide. "Ah, you feel so smooth, so slick..." Blush. "Yes, they did use a nice finishing touch on us, didn't they? So... what next?" "Let's just wait a few moments. I'm sure something will pop up." Silence. Smirk, grin. "By golly, I think you're right, Chakotay. I think I'm beginning to feel something bulging from your surface!" Leer, snicker. "And if I'm not mistaken, two little nubs are rising from your upper torso." Push, squiggle. "Arms! Chakotay, our arms can move..." Twist, wind, tangle. "And legs... we've got legs!" Wonderment. Surprise. "You know what that means..." "Yes, we can finally escape from B&B's sorry plots and make some of our own!" Sigh. "Aren't you glad Trish found these two bookmarks of us?" Smile, pull close. Kiss. "She'll never know what's she's done for us, Kathryn." Leer, touch, squeeze. "Oh, I think she will, Chakotay - I think she will!" Kiss, fondle, rip.... And you know the rest!
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