| Rogues Gallery |
| The Last Rogue stroked her Purple Turtle and sighed. "I wish I was as Captivating as Hell's Fugitive," she moaned. "I'm just a Lady In Drag." She looked around the barren gallery and saw a Serpent Girl. Moving closer, she saw a Kitty Katt talking to a toothbrush with Oral_B on the side. "On your knees, bytch boy!" the Kitty yelled at the poor B. The toothbrush shook its bristles and shouted back "Like Shytfire I will! I'm no submissive Trist. AFK, and (b)nuts to you!" And the ghost got up, and ran like Forest Gump. "Long live Wicaaaaaa..." were the last words heard from this rebel who wouldn't take attitude from a hooker Katt. That's right, did I mention the Kitty Katt was dressed in vinyl? Black vinyl too, the ho. The Serpent Girl picked up the Katt and walked out. The Rogue, left alone in her Gallery, got lonely and migrated to a new room. As soon as she walked in, she noticed an Angel Lamely molesting a fish. She cautiously took a seat at the bar and ordered a stack of Hotcakes with a side order of Rhiannon mouth Frys. Halfway through her meal, she was approached by a strange looking Pokemon wearing a tin foil crown. "I am Ruvachu, Dark Pokemon Lord. Has anyone ever told you that you're Dreamie? You should try wearing paper thongs." The Rogue, instantly wooed by this Spunky character, replied, "What makes you so sure I'm not wearing one now?" Then she drooled on him to show her affection. He groped her soundly, and they both slipped into a backroom, locked the door and CENSORED. A few hours later, they emerged. "That was a good game of chess," the Rogue said as they went their separate ways. Just then, out of nowhere came a flying fatass. A kangaroo on crack, giggling like a rabid hyena, bounced up and kicked the unknown object again. It stood up, and the kangaroo bounced around and shouted, "Bwahahahaha! Kitanalbytch fatass!! I punted you good." The Buck Futter pulled a spork out and jabbed the Dancing Hamster with it, producing a chorus of 'bah's and 'gah's. The Rogue glanced around the room, and a piece of good taste in the amazingly strange room caught her eye. With obvious relief, the Rogue breather a sigh and flopped over on the exquisitely manufactured, custom-made Italian leather sofa. "This should help my Kronic back pain," she said to herself, settling in. The door swung open, and in sauntered a Lone Rider, singing a familiar song. "They call me Mello yellow, ba da da dum..." She smiled at this obviously way cool guy. He smiled back, and she looked around again. In the corner, another Pokemon, PikaZue, and a strange Goast were fondling, groping, kissing and, in general terms, 'necking'. She politely averted her eyes and spotted a man, standing on a table in the middle of the room wearing a sign proclaiming 'TRISTAN4PREZ'. She noted the name, wondering when the election would take place, then looked for more craziness. She noticed a guy dressed in diapers, with a little bow and a quiver of pink arrows standing on the far side of the room. Next to him was another guy dressed as a sword, with a sign on his back saying 'Cupid's Blade'. Cupid's Blade was busy scratching himself, so the Rogue looked away. Next to Cupid and his blade was a guy wearing a potato sack. "I Like Potatoes," he was mumbling repeatedly. The Rogue turned to the girl sitting next to her at the bar. She looked somewhat like a keebler elf, and had a beer in one hand, a shot glass full of scotch in the other, a martini on the table in front of her, and dozens of shot glasses littering the floor and the bar around her. "Hi there, I'm a Spider's Shadow. Wanna dance?" she asked, and promptly passed out, her head landing squarely in a bowl of peanuts with a muffled 'whump'. The Rogue shrugged at the drunken wench and turned back to the room. To her surprise, everyone was naked. A sign over the door told her it was 'Nekkid hour'. She pulled off her scanty clothing, wanting to fit in with the crowd. Glancing around, she noticed the mad kangaroo was up to mischief again. She was sauntering, in human form, from person to person and groping them when they weren't looking. The kangaroo got to the Rogue, who promptly jumped up and started backing away. "Please don't grope me... I've had a bad experience with groping," she pleaded to the insane kangaroo, currently grinning madly at her. "Double bah and a few humbugs," she said. "Bah and a half, which makes bah ba." It winked at the Rogue. "You're insane," she told the psychotic bouncing fiend. "I prefer to call it eccentricity," the animal countered. "Well, Mister or Missus Eccentric Kangaroo, seek help." The kangaroo seemed to calm down slightly, and assumed a lecturing posture. "First off, that would be Missus because I'm female. Well, Miss, since I'm not married. Second, I'm not exactly an ordinary kangaroo. I'm a specimen of the Serial's Kangaroo, related to the ordinary kangaroo and part of the marsupial family. And lastly, you can't possibly know me well enough to judge my mental state in such a short time." The Rogue was surprised at this show of intelligence from what she thought before was just a remarkably insane small purple kangaroo with red polka dots, long rabbit ears and bright yellow eyes. "Ok then," the Rogue said, and turned around, bracing herself for more insanity. She spotted the Cupid's Blade guy sitting in a rocking chair, slowly rocking back and forth. She relaxed slightly at seeing someone doing something to mundane and normal, then shrieked and ducked as a mad man swung a viscous crowbar of maiming at her head. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" He apologized, after seeing that she was an obvious Rogue. "I thought you were a newbie." "Midget, you dumbass!" the kooky kangaroo appeared from nowhere and yelled at the madman still holding the crowbar. "This is a closed channel... only people who know about it can come in. That means no newbies begging items." "I know, but I miss baiting them. Press Alt + F4!" he shouted, turning to the Rogue. Since she had no idea what he wanted her to do, she just stood there and stared at him and after awhile his face fell and he turned away. "Burn! Would you like some Aloe Vera for that?" asked the kangaroo, bursting into laughter at her own joke. "Shut up, Darnit. You're such a bytch," the crazy guy replied. "I'm not a bytch," the kangaroo said. "I'm THE bytch. And that's Miss Bytch to you." "No, no, no!" the Kitty Katt who had tried to tame the toothbrush popped up and glared at the kangaroo. "I'm THE bytch," she retorted. "You're only number eight in the bytch hierarchy, while I am supreme ruler-bytch." "Whatev," the kangaroo replied, and bounced off making funny noises like 'Whaaabatoonma NOING beep beep skreeee craaash epoooo HA...' Just then, a barbarian popped up in front of the kanga. “Hello Sheld,” the marsupial said. “You’re the devil,” he replied, and walked off swinging his axe. |
| This one's just a mad ramble.. it probably won't make sense to you unless you're an old Rogue... |
| And of course, this is my original work and copyrighted to my name. |