Having got the A-Level results we needed way back last August, it meant DJ Wittzy (and Spenza) were accepted into the University of Exeter. Notty and Manish decided to go to Bristol, Lil Webby chose Plymouth, Wellman made the long trip north to Manchester, Salter buggered off to Kent (instead of Sheffield Hallam), Jerome travelled to Bournemouth, whilst AK (Brunel) and Woodsey (Queen Mary) went to parts of West and East London respectively. Bowen and Charles, on the other hand, decided they would remain at Woking College for another year - not out of choice, but because they are not as intelligent as the rest of us!
So basically this section is devoted to life at University (for those of us who were smart enough to get in, i.e. not Bowen and Charles, maybe I should include Salter in there too, as he isn't exactly smart is he.......) and what DJ Wittzy (and others) have been up to whilst away from Woking.
My main highlights are below, enjoy.
Let x = 1
x^2 = x (multiplying both sides by x)
(x^2) - 1 = x - 1 (subtracting 1 from both sides)
(x+1)(x-1) = x - 1 (expanding the brackets on the left hand side)
(x+1) = 1 (dividing both sides by (x-1))
So we have x = 0 (subtracting 1 from both sides)
BUT how can x = 0, when we said that x = 1 at the start???
Just a bit of fun, if that sort of thing turns you on...
Anyway, whilst I've learnt a lot of important things in Maths, I honestly believe that I've learnt more on Wikipedia during the last year or so! So here are some fascinating things which I found on there:
Droylsden F.C. - newly promoted from the Conference North to the renamed Blue Square Premier for 2007/08 - where they will meet Woking and Exeter - are based in Droylsden (obviously), Greater Manchester and are infact Manchester City F.C.'s closest neighbours. They play at the Butcher's Arm Ground and have the rather unappealing nickname "The Bloods".
The Crystal Maze - was first shown on Channel 4 as far back as 1990, and ran for six series. Richard O'Brien hosted the first four series and Edward Tudor-Pole the final two. The four zones originally consisted of Aztec, Futuristic, Medieval and Industral (which was later replaced by the Ocean zone in about '92 I think).
Keira Knightly - Jerome's current favourite actress and dream date, grew up in Teddington, West London - where me and Notty once played cricket for West End (and were comprehensively beaten). She is a West Ham United fan, too which is good to know.
Hollyoaks - whilst set in Chester, is infact filmed in Liverpool. And, while I'm talking about Chester, about 3/4 of the football club's ground is actually in Wales (instead of being completely in Cheshire).
Women - on average fart seven times per day (not so innocent then and not immune from it...), whilst men do it twelve times. (This wasn't actually anything to do with Wikipedia but still an intersting fact).
Generally I find myself on Wikipedia researching where English non-league football teams are based (dunno why?), so my UK geography of Northern England in particular has improved considerably (and of course I have finally realised that Stafford is not part of Manchester).
Another thing which I enjoy about university is the journey there and back (not in the car - that's painfully dull) on the South-West train line, which goes from London Waterloo to Exeter St. Davids and back again. I guess it's just nice to look at the pretty countryside go past whilst blasting out some techno on my MP3 player. On my way from Woking to Exeter I pass through six counties - Surrey (Woking), Hampshire (Basingstoke, Grately, Andover), Wiltshire (Salisbury), Dorset (Gillingham, Sherborne), Somerset (Templecombe, Yeovil Junction, Crewkerne) and finally Devon (Axminster, Honiton, Feniton, Pinhoe, Whimple, Exeter Central, Exeter St. Davids) taking the best part of just over three hours.
And of course it's much, much nicer in Exeter than it is in Woking - people are so much friendlier there, not stuck-up, snobby, chavvy, and much more laid back unlike in Surrey. Also there are much more pubs and clubs to go to, and the nightlife is much better in Exeter. Oh, and of course most importantly, the girls in Exeter are fucking gorgeous - absolute stunners most of them! Same can't really be said for Woking, but then again Exeter is a city, whereas Woking is a large town. Still, it's much more pleasant there and has beautiful surroundings, just like most of the South-West in general from what I've seen - far superior to the South-East (and the North as well obviously). I guess the only thing worse about the South-West is it always rains there, but when it's hot it gets pretty warm.
This was it. The first time that DJ Wittzy could claim he was a real "Raver". I was going to lose my "rave virginity" - it was going to be mad! DJ Wittzy and the Beats & Bass crew headed off to Shepton Mallet, Somerset in a hired minibus at about 11:30pm on a wet Saturday evening. The trip should have taken about an hour and ten minutes (as quoted on the leaflets) but took about two hours, as the minibus wasn't the nippiest of vehicles. Anyway, the atmosphere and excitement was building as we saw the hazy flashing lights on the horizon and we arrived about midnight. Finding a parking spot close to the actual place was difficult, and we had to walk a few hundred metres before we were officially there - to get there we had to negotiate a soggy, very muddy field - just like the true good old raves! What was rather funny that despite the cool, moist above conditions and atrocious conditions underfoot, we saw several very skimpily-clad young ladies wearing what looked like just bikinis, but with enormous, pink fluffy boots - watching them trying to avoid slipping over in the mud was very amusing. After passing through security we moved into what appeared to be a disused market area with old concrete building and tents - we had finally arrived! There were about six or seven kind of mini warehouses or tents to choose from, playing various styles of rave music, including drum 'n' bass, hard trance, techno, house, and the one I was obviously looking forward to most - the old skool tent! DJ Wittzy and the Beats & Bassers first headed to the drum 'n' bass one, probably the largest structure of them all, and inside it had amazingly cool lasers and visual effects, along with a stage and big screen behind it. It was absolutely packed in there and very, very hot with all the keen ravers (no doubt most of them on E or some other pills) jumping up and down. The heat was emphasized when you walked out of the exit and were effectively smacked in the face by the cool air outside, and you could even see steam coming out of the building! We moved to another drum 'n' bass tent soon after, before going to the old skool tent - I was well excited! Old skool masters Ratpack were on stage, pumping out the biggest tracks from '92. I was now in fully rave mood and went nuts when I heard the classic old breakbeats. During their set they played Baby D - Let Me Be Your Fantasy, SL2 - On A Ragga Tip, 2 Bad Mice - Bombscare, Liquid - Sweet Harmony, none of which are among my favourite tunes, but it was so good to hear them blasted out at full volume across Somerset! The best tracks were Shut Up And Dance - Raving I'm Raving and DJ Seduction - Hardcore Heaven (which I had heard for the first time only recently on Youtube) - absolutely mental! One random bloke was even impressed with my dancing, although it was raving not dancing, but I must agree with him (however drunk or stoned he was) that my raving was very good. That was pretty much that for the old skool tent unfortunately - I think we only caught about 40 minutes before Ratpack finished their set. As the night wore on, I became more and more tired, and had no choice but to see out the last couple of hours or so by sitting down along with a lot of other ravers, either also exhausted or mashed out of their heads, whilst the brave (or rather those who had consumed an excessive amount of E) continued to rave the night, I mean morning, away. We departed for Exeter at about 6am, getting back at 8am - just in time for me to watch the Sunday morning repeat of Match Of The Day. It had been a memorable night - drum 'n' bass may not be my cup of tea, but it was a fantastic experience to go to a proper rave. There are so many things that I noticed which make raving completely different to your average night of clubbing - first of all the music is obviously much less commercial and tailor-made to suit the taste of ravers. The people are more friendly and less hostile at raves - due to the large intake of drugs - but this makes them feel high as a kite and everything is wonderful and everyone is in sweet harmony and people of all different cultures and social classes can unite as one. The majority of the young women there were also sporting very revealing outfits - not shy to expose some bare flesh, which is always nice. This seemed a little odd at the time, but in all fairness it was very hot inside as I've mentioned. The downside is the outrageously overpriced drinks, but you can see why it's like that. Still, a can of beer for £5? I don't bloody think so. So there you have it, Raving - much more full-on than ordinary Clubbing!
Strangely, our Fresher's Ball (unlike everyone else's) was not in Fresher's Week. No. It was in week 7 of our first semester, which makes the title "Fresher's Ball" seem completely absurd... Anyway, when ours finally came round in November (the day before the Chelsea vs West Ham game if I remember correctly - not that you needed to know that) DJ Wittzy and several of the girls from Christow headed up to the Great Hall for the night. Such was the highly disproportionate girl-to-boy ratio (something like 3:1) in Christow, that I was the only guy to go along with about eleven or so of the girls. You may think I was very lucky to have so many females to accompany me for the evening, but in truth, they were the lucky ones to be with me. So that's really all the basic background information on the night - plenty of pictures below to enjoy.
Having got a taste of a proper rave in October, I was absolutely thrilled to find out that old skool legends Altern-8 were playing a set in Exeter in January. And they were to be playing at the Lemon Grove - one of the venues on the university campus which is turned into a bar/nightclub for the evenings - which was literally only two minutes walk away from St. German's - top one, nice one, get sorted!
Infact the evening was made up of several DJ sets, mainly breaks and a bit of drum 'n' bass, and was headlined by Dillinja. As the Lemon Grove (or the "Lemmy" as it is more commonly known - this confused Jerome when we used this term... what a donkey) is divided into two small-ish but open "rooms", there were two different sets going on simultaneously. Anyway, as I really didn't want to miss any of Altern-8, I headed up there reasonably early, but found myself waiting around for about three hours before they actually arrived on the scene. But bloody hell, the wait was definitely worth it!
Technically, it wasn't the original Altern-8 spinning the tunes, but the duo of Mark One and DJ Nex (as the Altern-8 project ended in 1993). Still, Mark Archer of the original line-up was mixing on the decks, so who cares? Having been relatively reserved in my raving - as there wasn't much to really get me going up until that point - things got going when I heard Humanoid - Stakker Humanoid blasting out! Oh yes! This was DJ Wittzy's time to shine. (Admittedly, Stakker wasn't my favourite rave track at the time, but having got an EP with all the main mixes of the track from '88, '92 and '01, including the 12" Original, I appreciate it a lot more now - infact I'd have to say it's definitely one of the best pieces of vinyl I own!). Next up was Manix - Feel Real Good, another proper old skool anthem, followed by one of the best old skool house anthems ever, Xpansions - Move Your Body. I went wild to this! But again (having obviously not taken any E, and not having consumed any Pepsi) I was suffering from fatigue, so my hardcore raving abilities were being limited. One guy even claimed I wasn't putting in any effort - the cheek! But I explained that I didn't drink, and then I showed him what I could do when Night In Motion was played. Infact, as possibly my favourite rave track, I nearly overdid when Cubic 22 - Night In Motion came on - ooops! I don't need bloody E to get me fucking ecstatic when I hear that track! So when I heard the "Party time!" sample and hardcore riffs mix in and signal the end of the previous track, I fucking went for it! Actually the pinnacle of the song for me is when the strings come in and are swiftly followed by the manic piano - absolutely classic, even the ladies like it (as opposed to other rave music) which is very nice to know. So when the manic piano bit came on I went ABSOLUTELY MENTAL! Almost like having a fit, but being in control. So basically I nearly overdid it, and had to pause for a breath or two as my chest was beginning to hurt... phew, what a spine-tingling feeling that song gave me, Night In Motion blasting out over the Exeter university campus, showing all the indie kids the error of their ways - marvellous! And it was so nice to hear proper old skool anthems being played for a change, rather than some sub-standard DJ playing Livin' Joy's Dreamer or The Original's I Luv U Baby, or even worse something like Run DMC vs Jason Nevins - It's Like That, passing it off as old skool to the unsuspecting crowd - god forbid. I suppose it does help a lot that Altern-8 were an integral part of the UK rave scene in the early 90s, but what delighted me even more, is that they played MY favourite old skool anthems. Example: instead of the overrated On A Ragga Tip by SL2, they spun DJs Take Control, a far superior track in my opinion, and again I went absolutely mad when it came on - that was infact the first time I heard the song somewhere other than when I play it at home on 12". Those incredible deep bass stabs rocked the dancefloor, sending vibrations throughout the room! Also, instead of playing The Prodigy's Out Of Space (which I absolutely despise, because it is the only Prodigy record which ever gets played in the clubs and because all the indie kids like it...), DJ Nex chose Charly (the Alley Cat version) - which I believe is the best Prodigy song - the samples are bloody hilarious, and you've got that lovely keyboard riff and breakbeats on top of a warped bassline going on. Sweet. Other major tunage heard that night was the instrumental version of 40 Miles by Congress (another quality old skool tune with an irrestibly catchy deep bassline, similar to that of DJs Take Control), Quadrophonia's self-titled Belgian techno anthem, Awesome 3's Don't Go (unfortunately it was the Original mix instead of the Kicks Like A Mule mix, which is better), Beltram's Energy Flash, Human Resource's Dominator and everyone's favourite rave anthem - Hardcore Heaven! Of course Altern-8 wouldn't have done justice to themselves had they not whacked out some of their own hits, and that's exactly what they did. The definitive Infiltrate 202 came about halfway through the set, and then to conclude what was without doubt the best hour or so of my life, Evapor-8 which brought the curtain down (not literally) on the most fantastic old skool set ever! I went back to St. German's that night feeling more satisfied than I'd ever been, with a big grin on my face. WOW! What a night! And a massive thumbs up to Altern-8 for making my night so immense.
Finally, I would just like to emphasize that in other parts of this site, I keep mistakingly associating Altern-8 and Stafford with Manchester. Now, having looked at Wikipedia for hours on end making myself more familiar with Northern England, I just want to assure everyone that Stafford has nothing to do with Manchester, as it is located in Staffordshire in the MIDLANDS, i.e. NOT the North-West, and so NOT part of Greater Manchester!!! Stafford is infact several miles south of Manchester, so I will try and correct the errors relating to that on my site if I can.
One of the most important weekends in the footballing calendar had finally arrived. No, it wasn't the FA Cup final. And no, it wasn't the Champion's League final. It was infact much more important than those two put together (if have no interest in the FA Cup or Champion's League, and you're a hardcore non-league fan that is...). That's right, it was the second meeting between Exeter City and Woking in the Nationwide Conference.
7th-placed Exeter had already put one over on the 12th-placed Cards with a 2-0 win at Kingfield earlier on in the season. But we sent a large group of Woking fans down for the game at St. James' Park (no NOT the small, old, crumbling shit-hole in Newcastle), and I was excited! My very first visit to see the Grecians, against my home town club! Joining me in Exeter to cheer on the Cards were my parents, Jerome, AK and Notty, whilst Spenza and Johnny (both obviously already in Exeter) also came to the match. Notty was first to arrive, having nearly failed to make the trip after suffering from an outbreak of flu across the University of Bristol campus, and about an hour later AK and Jerome, who had both conveniently joined the same train at Salisbury (having come from London and Bournemouth respectively) got in to Exeter. Well, I say they both got in to Exeter - AK did, but Jerome nearly headed off in completely the wrong direction after getting on to the platform. Anyway everyone had safely arrived, and it was off to Weatherspoons for the evening. When we headed back to campus and Jerome and AK had dumped their stuff in my room (whilst Notty went back to Spenza's place), the three of us had a bit of a dilemma. Trying to fit three people into a double bed - it's much harder than it sounds! Now let me just emphasize that no-one wanted to share a bed, but that really was the only option. Eventually, the three of us worked out a method in which we could all just about squeeze on the bed. That was without doubt the most uncomfortable night's sleep ever - and ladies, I'm warning you now, you DON'T ever want to share a bed with Jerome - blowing his nose all night, snoring, farting, kicking everyone else in the bed, the list goes on......
Finally the day of the match had arrived, and we made our way up to the ground with a nine-strong army. We were sitting at the very back of the old wooden stand (not sure what it's called) at one side of the pitch, behind all the Exeter City fans - the majority of which were young children - whilst the rest of the away support were behind one of the goals, with no shelter and getting wet in the rain. The Woking team arrived first out on the pitch (as is traditional with away teams coming out first) in an all sky blue change strip. The home team arrived shortly after, coming out to the tune of the KLF's Last Train To Trancentral incredibly!! The classic "This is what KLF is about", "All aboard, all aboard, wo-hooo" and "Back to the heavyweight, back to the heavyweight, jam!" vocal samples with the brilliant trancey and piano riffs blasted out of the loud-speakers at full volume! Never in my wildest dreams did I expect to hear a classic pumping KLF rave track at a football game, but credit to whoever thought Exeter City should make their entrance to Last Train To Trancentral. Notty was less pleased when he saw my delighted face and I told him who the song was by. So back to the football, and the game was underway. The home side had most of the possession early on, but both sides had decent chances to take the lead. Exeter came closest first, causing Cards keeper Nick Gindre to tip an effort over the crossbar, that was before Woking should have broken the deadlock but a close range effort somehow spooned up onto the top of the Exeter crossbar when it should have been buried. I couldn't believe they missed that - the look of sheer disbelief on my face said it all. But in an otherwise relatively quiet half in which Woking more than held their own against the play-off chasing Grecians, the highlight was the small collection of Woking fans sitting behind us at the top of the stand, who were outsinging the young Exeter City fans infront of them. For most of the first half all we could hear was "WE ARE THE CAR-DI-NALS! WE ARE THE CAR-DI-NALS!" booming out from behind us, and when they weren't chanting, it was the young home supporters singing "Come on City, come on City!" in response, but they were easily outsung, despite the fact they completely outnumbered the Woking fans. The best chant from the Woking fans to the Exeter kids was "Someone's going to touch you!" ha ha great stuff - that scared them off. 0-0 at half-time then, but bad news came through from the Premiership as West Ham's miserable run of form was continuing, trailing 0-1 at home to a dismal Watford side - what complete and utter rubbish! And Woking were soon 0-1 down too, as my day was very rapidly turning into a damp squib - just like the weather. Woking keeper Gindre came out of his area to make a clearance, but failed to clear City's Jon Challinor who fired into an empty net from 30 yards - a good first-half effort undone within a few minutes of the restart... To be honest the home side were well worth their 1-0 lead as they controlled large periods of the second half, but after missing a glorious chance to make it 2-0 when a close-range shot was blocked by desperate Woking defending, the visitors could have nicked a point late on when one of the strikers raced clear only to shoot straight at the Exeter keeper. Full-time: Exeter 1-0 Woking, a fair result, not a great game but a good day out at least, that was until I found out West Ham had indeed lost to Watford (with Harewood missing a penalty), whilst Chelsea and Newcastle had both recorded victories, pleasing both Notty and Jerome. Again we spent the night at Weatherspoons before spending another very hot and uncomfortable night in my room. And that was pretty much that, other than to say I fell seriously ill the following Thursday, thanks to either Notty, or more probably Jerome (who lay very near to me with his cold) - cheers guys, I will no doubt be happy to repay that favour...!
Having completed our summer exams exactly a week ago, 11 maths students (one of which was DJ Wittzy) took part in a specially arranged football match played against a team of postgraduates and tutors. We deployed a solid 4-4-2 system, with DJ Wittzy in the left-back position. Apparently, the previous year's match had seen the students obliterate the tutors with a 9-1 demolition, so it was up to the DJ and co to continue the success. After a competitive opening, it was the postgrads who struck first, but the undergrads were soon on level terms. The postgrads regained the lead shortly after from a rare goalkeeping error, but were immediately pegged back to 2-2 by the determined young undergrads, who then took the lead for the first time in the game. However, the postgrads pulled level again immediately from kick-off when one of the tutors just managed to fire his shot inches past the diving head of the unlucky DJ Wittzy on the goal-line. But those celebrations were short-lived as the postgrads again found themselves trailing going into half-time. 4-3 up at the break - quite a first half (certainly never get anything like that in the modern Premier League...). And the confidence was clearing showing in the undergrads play, as we took control of possession early in the second half. It looked as though we may have put the game out of sight as we cruised into a 6-3 lead, but a long-range screamer and an unfortunate own goal gave the postgrads some hope. Unfortunately for them, it was nothing other than a couple of consolation goals, as the undergrads won the game by a relatively convincing 8-5 scoreline. So for the second successive year a victory for the undergrads and a decent enough, if not dominant, display from the reliable DJ at the back.
FULL TIME:
UNDERGRADUATES XI------------------8
POSTGRADUATES & TUTORS XI-----5
