Season 2005
May 2005, Teddington a) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
Yes me and Notty travelled up to West London to play our first game of the season, on the first day of May 2005, and er.... got beaten (they were 169 for 0!!)... Here's how me and Notty performed (I say Notty "performed", he was his usual useless self)
Score Summary:
Teddington 263-7 (45 overs)
West End 152-8 (all out)
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 111 runs
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0
Balls: 4
How out: bowled
Position: No 7
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 12-1-60-2
Wickets: 1 bowled, 1 caught (keeper)
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 1
How out: bowled
Position: No 6
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 2-0-30-0 (That was a costly mistake which will not be made again... ever. I think Notty has proved that not only is he hopeless at batting and catching, but he can't bowl for shit either...)
May 2005, [?] h) :
Score Summary:
West End 53 all out
Visitors 57-2 (13 overs)
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 8 wickets
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 1
Balls: 6
How out: bowled
Position: No 8
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 1-0-13-1
Wickets: 1 bowled
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 1
How out: bowled
Position: No 6
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL (thank god)
....And because we lost so quickly (and easily), we had time for a "Beer Match" - 10 overs per side, everyone has to bowl one over (basically a slog match to decide who buys the drinks). Unsurprisingly, we lost that game as well - they got 93, we got 67. Notty and me both scored two runs and were both bowled (I managed to drag the ball onto my stumps - d'oh!).
May 2005, Tilford a) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
Fortunately Notty was unable to make this game, but we were still easily beaten, though we were less than 3 overs away from a draw AND we put 100 runs on the board (makes a change, doesn't it?). Anyway this place had the wierdest pitch I have ever seen - it was in the middle of two massive slopes and surrounding by three roads, so if you were stupid enough to park your car there you would probably find a nice big dent in it after the game. Oh yeh, and their no11 batsman was actually TIMED OUT, which was rather funny...
Score Summary:
Tilford 210 all out
West End 104 all out
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 106 runs
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 1
Balls: 13
How out: caught
Position: No 8
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 2-0-26-0 (yeh ok I bowled like Notty... everyone has bad days, some more than others...)
June 2005, [?] a) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
I did not actually play in this game - Spenza, making his debut, took my place (not because he is better than me...), but because Notty was playing as well, West End took another thumping...
Score Summary:
Opposition 230-2
West End 57 all out
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 173 runs
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 5 (Either it is a miracle, or he's lying...)
How out: bowled
Position: No 6
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL (thank god)
Spenza's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0
How out: bowled
Position: No 7
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
July 2005, Fairlands h) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
This game will go down in history no doubt! West End Cricket Club had finally recorded their first win this season; my first win whilst I have played for them. Due to shortage of players, I was joined by my fellow companions Notty, Spenza and, playing his 2nd game, Manish. Incredibly, we got a wicket with the first ball of the match, and although the other lot only had 9 players, Mikey's five-wicket haul helped bowl them out for 63, and there was no need for any bowling changes! Because we were chasing a "small" target (still large enough for West End to be comprehensively defeated), Manish opened the batting, Notty coming in at 3 (yes, even he wasn't to sure about that decision...), DJ Wittzy at number 4 and Spenza at 5. But when Notty had been clean bowled for a golden duck (the first of many), the score was 2 for 2. But, the DJ and Manish took the score up to 38 before the next wicket fell - Manish edging behind for an excellent 27 (the highest score of the innings). Spenza was next to go, harshly adjudged lbw for 5 (his first runs for West End) before the wickets started to tumble. Meanwhile, at the other end, DJ Wittzy had moved into double figures and was showing true Mike Atherton style-like grit. But when the ninth wicket had fallen, the score was on 61 - three to get. Luckily, I survived the over which allowed Mikey to hit the winning boundary, and I had recorded my highest score, with an unbeaten 23. Close game, but the win was great!
Score Summary:
Fairlands 63-8 (all out)
West End 67-9
MATCH RESULT: WIN by 1 wicket
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 23
Balls: 64
How out: NOT OUT
Position: No 4
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0 (it HAD to happen sooner or later...)
How out: bowled
Position: No 3
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL (thank god)
Spenza's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 5
How out: lbw
Position: No 5
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Manish's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 27
How out: caught (keeper)
Position: No 2
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
July 2005, Ottershaw h) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
After last week's high, normal service was resumed as West End took another thumping - this time by nine wickets. We batted first for a change, on a bone-dry, very uneven nasty pitch which produced inconsistent bounce throughout. Manish again top-scored, and the DJ added another not out score, whilst Notty made one, and Spenza recieved another "controversial" decision which cost him his wicket. It took me 18 balls to get off the mark and I added a boundary to my score, whilst also being hit on both feet in the first over I faced, and taking one on the side of the face from a ball which rocketed up off the pitch. Defending 87 is never easy, and despite a reasonably good spell of bowling from the DJ, I had nothing to show for my efforts with the ball.
Score Summary:
West End 87 all out
Ottershaw 90-1
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 9 wickets
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 5
Balls: 27
How out: NOT OUT
Position: No 9
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 6-0-37-0
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 1
How out: caught
Position: No 8
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL (thank god)
Spenza's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0
How out: caught (keeper)
Position: No 10
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Manish's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 14
How out: caught
Position: No 2
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
July 2005, Brookwood a) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
This was our first game at Brookwood, our "second home" if you like, as our social lot practice here regularly, so it didn't feel like an away game. But we were easily defeated again, as Manish (our top-scorer for the past two weeks) was missing from our batting line-up, so Charles made his debut at number 8 in the order. We won the toss an opted to bat first on another baking hot afternoon, and the DJ, batting at the dizzy heights of number 4 in the order, was soon at the crease with the score at 13-2. I played another very patient innings, harshly branded "boring" by Spenza and co, taking me 15 balls before edging for four which gave me my first runs. Ben, at the other end, was scoring all the runs but when he departed for 19, the innnings fell apart; Spenza, Notty and Charles all ignored my advice to "dig in" and all three were out in the space of two overs, scoring a meagre 3 runs between them. So it was up to the DJ again to give the innings a respectable score - I was able to notch a couple of boundaries off the part-time spinners towards the end of the innings, but a thin edge to the 'keeper brought my downfall; I was joint top-scorer with 19 off 66 balls. The next highest score was 7... and despite Ben's 3 wickets, the home side eased home to their small target of 65 with 7 wickets in hand. We even had time for a Beer match - this time we only lost by 10 runs - and I took a wicket with my first ball. Even Spenza grabbed a wicket, Notty didn't. Chasing 90 to win, Charles (who was out first ball in the proper match) smashed 20 runs (and also got one in the bollocks, wearing no box... needless to say, Charles was rolling around on the ground in agony for a good few minutes), but when Notty came in the run-rate slowed, and despite his 5 runs (which should never have been, as he was dropped off an easy catch) and two consecutive sixes from Ben, we lost for the second time that day. Oh, and one last impressive statistic - my batting average for the last three games is 47!!!
Score Summary:
West End 64 all out
Brookwood 68-3
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 7 wickets
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 19
Balls: 66
How out: caught (keeper)
Position: No 4
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 2.1-0-18-0
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 1
How out: caught
Position: No 6
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL (thank god)
Spenza's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 2
How out: bowled
Position: No 5
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Charles' stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0
How out: caught (keeper)
Position: No 7
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
July 2005, Eggham h) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
We actually had a strong line-up for a change, as Notty was on holiday and Spenza and Charles were "dropped" for this week's game, and in their place were 4 players from Chobham, and the change obviously worked as West End managed 157 all out - one of the highest scores this season. One of the Chobham guys scored 60 and took two wickets with his spin - certainly couldn't see Notty doing anything like as well as that. Manish returned to open the innings, but was soon back in the pavilion after he got a little unlucky with one that kept low and knocked back his off stump. But West End took advantage from there on, cruising to 105-2, before another batting collapse saw the innings finish on 157. Even the DJ, despite his latest run of impressive form, only managed one with the bat (but only because I was told to "up the tempo", which is not my usual style of batting - I take ages to get my eye in and start scoring. I was also a little unlucky, as the ball looped up off a top-edged half-sweep shot into the 'keeper's gloves). But at least we had a decent chance of winning. Unfortunately, the other lot won by 6 wickets with plenty of time left, that was despite a four-over spell from the DJ, which produced figures of 1-26. I got lucky with my wicket - the batsman had hit me for four and six in the previous two balls, but next delivery, dragged the ball onto the leg stump, just removing the leg bail. Dare I say it, I also put down a difficult catch on the run which went miles up in the air and took ages to drop...
Score Summary:
West End 157 all out
Egham 160-4
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 6 wickets
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 1
Balls: 11
How out: caught (keeper)
Position: No 9
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 4-0-26-1
Wickets: 1 bowled
Manish's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 2
How out: bowled
Position: No 2
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
August 2005, Ottershaw a) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
On the day that England just (and only just) beat Australia by 2 runs in the 2nd Ashes test at Edgbaston, me, Notty and Spenza travelled up to Ottershaw to play against the same side we had met just four weeks earlier - that time they bowled us out for less than 90 runs, and we didn't have a full team this week. So, having been asked to bat, at 36-4 (with Notty back in the pavilion for a second-ball duck - HA HA - he was inevitably going to make some more noughts) it was fair to say we were in a little bit of trouble. Fortunately, Ian (who made 48) and Jonno put together a 50-partnership, and we managed to survive the full 40 overs without being bowled out, finishing on 119-8. Spenza made 3, batting at number 9, whilst yours truly only managed one scoring shot from 30 balls... still the DJ was not out at the end of the innings. So, with a reasonable score to defend, it was up to the DJ to put their batsman under pressure - and with only 33 runs conceded off 13 overs and one wicket to show for my efforts - not a bad day's work. Notty and Spenza both spilled catches (the guy who Spenza dropped could not have hit it any more precisely towards him, but to be fair to Spenza he did his part in running out their opener), and the home side won by 6 wickets with four overs remaining.
Score Summary:
West End 119-8 (40 overs)
Ottershaw 120-4 (36 overs)
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 6 wickets
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 2
Balls: 30
How out: NOT OUT
Position: No 7
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 13-3-33-1
Wickets: 1 caught (keeper)
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0 (the 2nd of many...)
How out: bowled
Position: No 5
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL (thank god)
Spenza's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 3
How out: caught
Position: No 9
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
August 2005, Windlesham h) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
On another day when we were short of players, Big Webby stepped in to make his West End debut, joining colleagues Notty, Spenza and Manish (and of course the DJ). On a day when conditions were moist (or rather "damp") at times, we fielded very well, bowling the opposition out for a reachable target of 136. As I said the fielding was overall excellent, but that didn't stop Notty flooring an absolute dolly of a catch early on, mind you I did put down a very catchable chance, diving forward but the ball slipped out of my hands as I went to ground. However, I more than made up for that, taking personal best bowling figures of 4-40 from 12 overs, bowling all four batsmen in the process! It could have been a 5-fer, but Craig wrapped up the tail (bowling the last batsman), taking three wickets of his own and Andy notched the other three. So, after that excellent display in the field, we were fairly confident of having a chance at winning. But after sliding to 27-6 in reply, victory hopes were soon out of the window. Notty, Spenza and even the DJ made ducks (although it was nice to see Spenza dig-in like the DJ had in previous weeks). Even the reliable Manish, this time not opening the innings, only made 5. But debutant Webby, batting at number 11, managed to score a run on his debut, so "Big Up Yourself" Webby!!
Score Summary:
Windlesham 136 all out
West End 66 all out
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 70 runs
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0
Balls: 2
How out: lbw
Position: No 10
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 12-2-40-4
Wickets: 4 bowled
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0 (this is becoming a regular occurence Mr Nott, although this is what many expected...)
How out: bowled
Position: No 6
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL (thank god)
Spenza's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0
How out: caught
Position: No 8
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Manish's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 5
How out: bowled
Position: No 3
Bowling:
Catches taken: 1
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Big Webby's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 1
How out: bowled
Position: No 11
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
September 2005, Hawley a) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
After getting lost on the way there - Notty was driving, you see - the DJ returned to Hawley, with companions Notty, Spenza, Manish and Simon (who was making his debut). Having done extremely poorly at Hawley (the ground I made my debut at in '03) in the past, getting two noughts and no wickets, it was time for DJ Wittzy to shine. On a hot day (luckily) we batted first and got off to our usual poor start, opener Charlie out for 0 - the first of four wickets to fall for only about 20 runs, but Manish and Simon put together a decent partnership to guide the score past 50. Simon (who had made his way to 7 without ever looking troubled) was unlucky to be out when the ball bounced up higher than he thought and top-edged one to the keeper. But Manish raced along to 26 (one short of his best score), which included no fewer than 6 fours, before he was yorked. In came Spenza, who played very professionally with a solid defence and good patience, hitting two boundaries in his highest-ever score (so far) of 14, and by the time he was out, in came the DJ with the score at 88-6. Again, it took me bloody ages to get going (I only scored my first two runs of the 26th ball I faced...), but when Jonno was out for 17 at the other end, the runs dried up - in came (the hopeless) Notty, and was easily bowled out first ball, attempting one of those crappy slog shots he always plays. But when the DJ finally started to score, the last wicket took the score past 100. And I was the last man out, yorked for 7, by the same guy who got Manish out. So, 105 was needed by the home side to win, but a "tired" performance in the field saw them win by 9 wickets - it was knackering out there to be fair to us. I did take the only wicket, bowling a short-ish delivery which took the batsman's glove on the way through to our keeper (Ian). Funny thing was, that was the worst appeal ever (only me and someone else asked the question in a less-than-convincing manner) but it was out, so I ain't complaining.
Score Summary:
West End 104-9 (all out)
Hawley 105-1
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 9 wickets
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 7
Balls: 40
How out: bowled
Position: No 8
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 10-2-43-1
Wickets: 1 bowled
Notty's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0 (His second golden, and I think his third 0 in a row, Oh fucking dear... Because he got the worst score, he had to put away the kitbag - ha ha, that's justice)
How out: bowled
Position: No 9
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL (thank god)
Spenza's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 14
How out: bowled
Position: No 6
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Manish's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 26
How out: bowled
Position: No 3
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Simon's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 7
How Out: caught
Position: No 5
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 4-0-20-0
September 2005, Chadwick h) :
DJ Wittzy's match report:
West End's final match of the 2005 season saw Gary, of all people, make his debut for the home side. However, a miscalculation before the game had begun meant that 12 players had turned up for West End. That resulted in Charlie, Spenza and Notty trying to guess Craig's secret number (from 0-500). (Un)Fortunately, Notty was the furthest away from Craig's secret number, so he had to sit out the game... which meant we had a significantly higher chance of winning. And that was evident when we bowled the visitors out for 157 in the final over of their innings. Although the DJ didn't take a wicket, figures of 0-23 from 8 overs showed that I bowled tidily. Simon bowled very well, taking 2-24 from his 8-over spell, but it's fair to say the hero of the bowling attack was Ben, who notched 4-17. 157 from 40 overs was definitely reachable, especially without Notty, and with 45 from "Sausage", the score moved swiftly on to 115-4 (which included 12 from Manish before he was adjudged to have been stumped by umpire Spenza). But a mix-up involving Charlie (who made a personal best 24) and Simon saw the latter run out for 8, and that caused the inevitable mini-collapse that we at West End are so used to - the DJ went for a duck and Gary made 5 in his first match. Last man Craig joined number 9 batsman Spenza with the score on 130-9, but we fell agonisingly short - only 7 runs were required, before Spenza was unluckily bowled out for 4.
Score Summary:
Chadwick 156 all out (39.4 overs)
West End 150 all out
MATCH RESULT: LOSS by 6 runs
DJ WITTZY'S STATS:
Batting:
Runs scored: 0
Balls: 7
How out: lbw
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 8-2-23-0
Notty's stats:
Ha ha! he doesn't have any stats for this match, but he's probably the first person ever to be dropped because 12 people turned up and then he was furthest away from guessing a number between 0 and 500!! Bad luck Notty...
Spenza's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 4
How out: bowled
Position: No 9
Bowling:
Catches taken: 1 (his first catch and well taken, too)
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Manish's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 12
How out: stumped
Position: No 4
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
Simon's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 8
How out: run out
Position: No 6
Bowling:
Bowling figures: 8-0-24-2
Wickets: 1 lbw, 1 bowled
Gary's stats:
Batting:
Runs scored: 5
How out: caught
Position: No 8
Bowling:
Bowling figures: DID NOT BOWL
- - - 2005 BATTING & BOWLING AVERAGES - - -
BATTING AVERAGES
Player Matches Innings Runs Highest Score 0's Not Outs Average
Manish 6 6 86 27 0 0 14.33
Simon 2 2 15 8 0 0 7.50
DJ Wittzy 11 11 59 23* 3 3 7.38
Gary 1 1 5 5 0 0 5.00
Spenza 8 8 28 14 3 0 3.50
Notty 9 9 9 5 4 0 1.00
Big Webby 1 1 1 1 0 0 1.00
Charles 1 1 0 0 1 0 0.00
BOWLING AVERAGES
Player Overs Maidens Runs Wickets Economy Best Bowling Average Catches
Simon 12.0 0 44 2 3.67 2-24 22.00 0
DJ Wittzy 70.1 10 319 10 4.55 4-40 31.90 0
Notty 2.0 0 30 0 15.00 0-30 - 0
Manish - - - - - - - 1
Spenza - - - - - - - 1
Big Webby - - - - - - - 0
Charles - - - - - - - 0
Gary - - - - - - - 0