mystory2

MY STORY--PAGE 2 2001-2005

I will add updates to my story on this page. If your interested--check back for the updates...thanks for visiting my site. If you have a story you would like to share---email me.

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       02-13-01 - It's been a very long time since I was able to update this, but here I am finally. All is going well in our family. Savannah is doing good in her program and we are hoping she will be home in August. She was home for visits in November, December and February. I went down to see her in October. Looks like she will get to come home for monthly visits now. That is great!!!!
     03-22-01 - Well we have a computer in our home again, so will be doing some updates to my site. All is going well. Heather is 18 now!! It is hard to believe. She is finishing up her schooling at home. She wants to get married next year. Savannah is doing well, and we all can't wait for her to be home. It is so hard without her here. But at least she is getting the help she needs.
     4-11-01 - Had another great visit with Savannah. She came home on the 4th and I had to leave for Sacramento that day, but at least I had the weekend with her. She celebrated her 16th birthday. She is doing well. On Saturday we had a combo baby shower for my sis and bdays for Savannah and for my niece Amber. We all had a great time and Heather even got a belated bday present from my sis.
     5-11-01 * Things have been interesting around here. Vannah got to come home again for another visit in April, but she hasn't been home to visit yet this month :(. Hopefully next weekend. Heather's fiance is now living with us because his grandparents kicked him out of their home. He isnt out of school yet, and I couldn't let him be on the streets so he is here, hopefully not for too long! Oh well such is life. Hope everyone has a great mother's day.
     7-1-01 * It has been a good day today. We went to court for a review of Savannah's placement, and they are actually taking my request for her to come home seriously. We go to court again on the 16th. I am worried about her coming home and getting bored and she may start drinking, but that possibility will always exist. She has been clean for 90 days and that is quite an accomplishment. So even if she doesn't get to come home earlier, she should be home in September sometime. And the judge told us it was nice to see parents who are involved with their child because so many times they are not. That made us feel good cause when you go through something like this you start doubting how good you are at parenting. Also today I found out that I did really well in an interview I went to last week. It would be nice to get the new job, but if I don't that is okay, I am just so thrilled to have done well at the interview. I hate interviewing and usually do awful with them.
     8-20-01 Well, Savannah isn't home yet, and I've been fighting to get her here, but then I talked to her counselor this evening, and now I'm not sure she is ready to come home. I am so confused and don't know what to say to her. How do I tell her it is best she stays after telling her I would get her home right away. I am so upset over this and just praying for the Lord's guidance. I only want what is best for her, and right now, I am not sure what that is. For some good news, I did get that job I mentioned above and I started today. Please keep us in your prayers.
12-05-01 I hope everyone is enjoying the holiday time. My older daughter Heather moved out and with Savannah still gone it is awfully quiet at home. My job is going really well. Savannah was home for a visit for Thanksgiving and will be home for Christmas. Hopefully she'll be home for good in February. I sure hope so anyway. Come spring we will be getting some work done on our house. I will be nice to have new carpeting/linoleum and we'll be getting a monitor heater. Well enjoy your holidays.
     2-25-02 Another year, hard to believe. Good news, Vannah is home. I just ask that you all keep us in your prayers. So much to do! Meetings, counseling, court etc. I'm just glad she is home. We had the work done on our house, it looks great. Heather is getting married in April. I feel old!
      5-30-04 Well, it's been two years since I have updated my site. A lot has been happening. Heather moved out, got married, moved to another state, and then came back home. Her and her hubby are here with us until they can get a place of their own. Savannah completed drug court, got off probation and was doing well for a long time. Now things are kind of crazy. Savannah had cut on herself, and then was 51-50'd. She spent three days in the hospital, and then she was back home. The doctor wanted her to go into rehab, but she didn't want to. Drugs..........alcohol, pot, meth. The last scares me the most. Trying to get a change in meds for her. She now is ready to change her life, she wants to be happy. I just keep praying for her to be happy. I'd appreciate prayers. You know, when I think back on everything, I know there are things I did wrong, I wasn't a perfect parent. Perhaps I did the best I knew how. I know I avoided confrontation, I didn't want the fight! The rehab my daughter was in, was ok, but didn't really work on what she needed. Mostly just a group home to keep the girls. No required AA meetings or anything that is necessary to learn sobriety. So if you live in CA and are thinking of putting your daughter in a place called Drake House, just say no!!!
     6-5-04 This week I asked my daughter to leave our home. She wasn't sure if she wanted to stop using meth. I didn't know what to do and what I did was the hardest thing i've ever done. I figured it was time for her to take responsibilty for herself. I hurt so bad, didn't hear from her. Yesterday she came to get her stuff. She looked good and says shes clean and she's glad I made her leave. She's coming over for dinner tonight. I just keep praying for her. It's all I can do.   I'm working on a new page about meth addiction. Click here to view my new page.
     6-8-04 My daughter did come to dinner on Sunday. She looked good, but tired. I pray she really is clean as she says she is. She came over yesterday while I was at work. Taking the rest of the week off - time to relax!
     7-18-04 My daughter is back home. She was very upset and begged to come back home. I let her, with certain rules. So I just keep praying for her. I just want her to be happy, I guess that is what we all want for our children.
     8-8-04 God says he will never give us more then we can handle, sometimes I wonder if that is true. Things "seemed" to be going well, but they never really are. My daughter left - I didn't ask her to.   She left either late Saturday night or early Sunday morning of last week. When she didn't come home Monday, I went to where I figured she'd be. She doesn't want to come home, doesn't even want to be in this county. She didn't take any of her stuff (as far as I know). All her meds are here, her clothes, etc. I haven't seen or talked to her since Monday. I am going to try to see her tomorrow. I worry that she may kill herself or that she actually will hitchhike out of this county. No money, don't know what she is going to do. I love the Lord and try to have faith, but it is getting harder to do. Why can't my daughter be happy and drug free? She says she doesn't believe in God and that this is the crappy life she is meant to have, that her life will never be better. That she will never live to have a good life. Why does this have to happen??
     11-04-04 My daughter called, crying, one day saying she wanted help, I thought she meant rehab, but she meant mental help. Told her she needed to do it, and that the mental health people said she needed to take care of the addiction problems first. Such a circle! Anyway she cut herself, quite deeply, on the arm and then called a hotline. Went to the hospital, but because she didn't really want to die - they wouldn't help her, told us to go to a hospital in Oregon and they would take her. What a joke that was, none of it worked out. I told them at the hospital in Oregon that it would only be a matter of time and there would be a blow up by her. Well, it was shorter then I thought. But now it is three months since that time. She is living with friends, and not doing much. She looks better and "seems" at least somewhat happy. I helped her apply for SSI. Don't know if she will get it or not, but I sure can't see her working. Mentally, I don't think she can handle it. She is smart enough, just not able at this time. So right now things are mostly calm. She comes over for Sunday dinner, and will come over to wash clothes or get something out of her room. Most of her stuff is still here. So we go on and pray for the best.
    2-7-05 Well, Savannah is now in rehab. She came home, and was clean for over 30 days before she went in. I will finally be able to talk to her on the 14th and can't wait. I miss her so much, but this is what she wanted and needed to do. I just continue to pray for her happiness.
6-8-05 Things have been going ok around here. Savannah was denied SSI and we are appealing. Will she get it, probably nnot, but it is worth a try. Things are always complicated. Right now my kiddo is on a trip across the states, and I will be worried until she reaches her destination. She hates to worry and upset me, but I am mom and can not help it. I found out that she came to this site and it made her cry, she was sadden by what she had put me through. I had told her when I first started this site, that I was going to do it, and what it was about, but I think she just forgot about it, or wasn't interested at the time. My intent sure wasn't to upset her. Doing this site has helped me get out my feelings and to hopefully help someone else going through some of the same things. So, I really hope in some small way I have helped others.
7-3-05 - It's been quiet here, my kiddo has been gone for a month on a vacation. It has been absolutely wonderful for her. Quite an adventure. She has learned that she can be self-reliant, that she can get out of the house and do things. She will be home next week, can't wait to see her. It will be hard for her to leave where she is, but I'm hoping her life will be better now that she has had this new experience. A week after she gets home we are off on a vacation.
11-12-05 - Savannah got married on October 28, 2005 and moved to Minnesota. I have pics of her wedding on a new page. Check it out. It is hard to believe she is married and has moved so far away. Thank goodness for Instant messengers!

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