Dr. A: “Well your damn right that it will decide the fate of his career. I’d think retirement is a pretty final thing and there’s no question as to who is going to win this match.” In Dr. Abortion’s Locker Room…
Evan Williams stands next to Dr. Abortion, with mic in hand. Ms. C is a step behind in the background.
“Evan: Hello There Fans, this is Evan Williams backstage in the Locker Room of Dr. Abortion, we’re just moments away from a return Matchup that will decide the fate of Carnage’s Career.”
Dr. A: “Well your damn right that it will decide the fate of his career. I’d think retirement is a pretty final thing and there’s no question as to who is going to win this match.”
Evan: “Hmm. Now, this ‘Evil Match’ is quite different from the format of the last one. No evil points, it’s an escape the Double-Deck Cage Scenario, how do you think you wi-”
Dr. A: “Evan, I believe I already made clear that I was going to win, with weapons and all he stands no chance… because I am the more evil man. Was last time still will be, just look at the facts…” “Carnage is walking around, being all sentimental and teary eyed about how this could be his final moments, boo-hoo. Am I crying about anything? Hell no. Evil men don’t cry like little girls. How can that boy say he’s more evil then me if he’s going to be a little pussy.”
Evan: “Well technically Dr. A, there is a loophole. All Carnage has to do is escape the Two Cages for freedom, you can commit more evil and still loose. Remember? Carnage committed more evil than you last time but you were the one who got the pin…”
Dr. A: “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Watch it there Evey… There is no way he will escape, I will be too busy doing purely evil things to him for him to have time to escape. When this is all said and done I would like all CRF slammers to come to my room, one at a time, bow down- and admit that I am the most Evil man alive.”
Evan: “Yes, but isn’t it true that… ow! Hey! Stop it!…”
Ms. Contraceptive pushes Evan out of the way and snatches the microphone.
Ms. C: “So darling, how many second do you think it will take to win the match?”
Dr. A: “Well Ms. C, probably a few hours to tell the truth. I mean, Carnage will be beaten and unconscious in just a few minutes. But I may chose to stay in the cages for longer, just to beat his lifeless body into a pulp. Then there will be no chance of him coming out of retirement.”
Ms. C: “Really? Ooo, your so sexy and strong.”
Dr. A: “Yes REALLY, seeing as how he will be dead and all, I find it unlikely for him to comeback. That’s only ever worked for one man, the Ultimate Warrior.”
Ms. C: “So let me get this right Dr. A: You are the more evil man and you will win this match.”
Dr. A: “Undoubtedly.”
Ms. C: “How brave and evil of you. So please tell these stupid CRF fans why, oh why you would do such a thing. Why could you be so damn cruel?!”
A booing noise can be heard from the crowd as they watch this on the Kron-o-Tron.
Dr. A: “Well, that’s simple sugarplum. Because I am evil. And now, the motivation for my evil comes from a new source.” I DO NOT want this win so that I will feel confident in myself. I DO NOT want this win to boast. I DO NOT want this win for any other reason than to see Carnage retire.”
Ms. C: “What? That’s a pretty evil statement.”
Dr. A: “I’m a pretty evil guy. The motivation is now only to retire Carnage. Why? He has had a good, long, prosperous career. He has accomplished many things. Made friends. My only wish is to take that all away from him, leave him in the shambles of retirement. My goal is simply put, to destroy a career of one of the few true competitors of CRF history.”
Ms. C drops the mic.
Ms. C: “Ooh, I love it when you talk like that.”
Ms. C embraces Dr. A as the picture fades to commercial break.