50 fun things to do at the movies

  1. At the end of the movie slump over like you're dead and don't move.
  2. Bring a jar of moths and let them loose during the movie. Gee, I wonder where they'll go?
  3. Shake up a can of pop and roll it down the aisle or under the seats.
  4. Throw popcorn at the people in front of you. Use Skittles for long-range targets.
  5. Before the movie starts sit by yourself and politely say "Sorry, this seat is taken" whenever anyone sits near you.
  6. Sit down and watch the previews. When they've over go out and complain that the movie was too short.
  7. Whenever anyone talks or makes any noise at all, loudly "SHHH!" them.
  8. Throw popcorn into the beam of light projecting on the screen. Complain that there's something wrong with the projector.
  9. Wear a sombrero.
  10. Speak loudly in a foreign language and then look around suspiciously when no one replies.
  11. Cough very loudly, very often. Complain that the popcorn is 'too dusty'.
  12. Have a detailed conversation with your friend about your extremely painful hemroids and contagious rashes. Make sure you are overheard.
  13. Sneak into other movies.
  14. See a movie twice. The second time, bring a megaphone and narrate the entire movie.
  15. Ask around and try and find out "who has the remote control".
  16. Remark on how big your TV is. Complain that you're not used to such a small screen.
  17. Go to the ticket office and tell them that you have a hearing disability. Demand that they turn the sound up for your comfort.
  18. Make bets with the people sitting next to you about what will happen next. Works best if you've already seen the movie.
  19. If you've already seen the movie, 'predict' everything that happens and claim that you're psychic. Offer to tell fortunes for popcorn.
  20. Spend the time before the movie examining the posters for upcoming attractions. Complain that you've already seen all those.
  21. Comment that this very same movie was being shown "on your satellite TV", but you wanted to "get the real feel" by coming to the cinema.
  22. Bring a flashlight. Try to make shadow pictures on the screen.
  23. Look disgusted at whatever the person next to you is eating. Exclaim "do you know what they put in that?" Insist that the ingredients include nicotine "to make you buy more".
  24. Bring in a video camera and film the entire movie. Explain that you're "making a documentary of violence in the media".
  25. Go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. Works best if you're sitting in the middle of a lot of people.
  26. Wear sunglasses. Complain that the movie is too dark.
  27. Look official. Bring in 50 of those 3-D glasses and pass them out as if it were a 3-D movie.
  28. Take notes. Become very annoyed whenever someone glances your way.
  29. Sit in the aisle. Complain that the folding seats scare you.
  30. Jump up suddenly and scream. Insist that "something bit you".
  31. Tell everyone that the movie is X-rated.
  32. At a PG-13 movie ask smaller kids "Do your parents know that you're here?"
  33. Ask where you can plug in your electric razor.
  34. Put SuperGlue on the seat in front of you.
  35. Bring a small pet like a kitten or mouse and let them roam around.
  36. Buy Skittles. Halfway through the movie go to the snack counter and complain that you can't "taste the rainbow".
  37. Tap people in front of you on the shoulder, then look around and whistle casually.
  38. Bring your own, wooden chair. Insist that you're "allergic to upholstery".
  39. Complain that your popcorn is too hot and your drink is too cold.
  40. At the end of the movie look around suspiciously and exclaim, "Where's my wallet (or purse)?" Insist on a police search of everyone present.
  41. Cry loudly at the funny parts and laugh uncontrollably during the sad parts.
  42. Complain that the special effects are no good and that there's "not enough blood".
  43. Demand that someone get out of "your seat". Insist that you "called it last time" or that you "always sit there".
  44. Pretend that you're swatting flies during the movie. Bring some Raid.
  45. Sneak in your own food, but bring cans of it and cook it over your camp stove.
  46. Insist that the snack bar must provide a "vegetarian alternative" to popcorn.
  47. When the movie is over, stay behind and read the credits.
  48. Bring your Game Boy or Walkman. Turn the volume waaaay up.
  49. On the way out, insist that you've lost a contact and that nobody move until it is discovered.
  50. Demand that management keep the lights on throughout the movie because of your special medical condition.