YOU'RE PROBABLY AN ENGINEER IF...

• If you introduce your wife as -mylady@home.wife-
• If your spouse sends you an e-mail instead of calling you to dinner
• If you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie
• If you want an 8X CD-ROM drive for Christmas
• If Dilbert is your hero
• If you stare at an orange juice container because it says CONCENTRATE
• If you can name 6 Star Trek episodes
• If the only jokes you receive are through e-mail
• If your wristwatch has more computing power than a 486DX-50
• If your idea of good interpersonal communication means getting the decimal point in the right place
• If you look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids' toys
• If you use a CAD package to design your son's Pine Wood Derby car
• If you've used coat hangers and duct tape for something other than hanging coats and taping ducts
• If, at Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string
• If you window shop at Radio Shack
• If your ideal evening consists of fast-forwarding through the latest sci-fi movie looking for technical inaccuracies
• If you have -Dilbert- comics displayed anywhere in your work area
• If you carry on a one-hour debate over the expected results of a test that actually takes five minutes to run
• If you're convinced you can build a phaser out of your garage door opener.
• You can remember 7 computer passwords but not your anniversary
• If you've memorized the program schedule for the Discovery channel and have seen most of the shows already
• If you've ever owned a calculator with no equal key and know what RPN stands for
• If your father sat 2 inches in front of your family's first color TV with a magnifying lens to see how they made the colors, and you grew up thinking that was normal
• If you know how to take the cover off of your computer, and what size screwdriver to use
• If you can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting
• If people groan at the party when you pick out the music
• If you can't remember where you parked your car for the 3rd time this week
• If people hound you for pocket protectors at Halloween time
• If you did the sound system for your senior prom
• If your checkbook always balances
• If your girlfriend says the way you dress is no reflection on her
• If your wristwatch has more buttons than a telephone
• If you have more friends on the Internet than in real life
• If you thought the real heroes of -Apollo 13- were the mission controllers
• If you think your computer looks better without the cover
• If you think that when people around you yawn, its because they didn't get enough sleep
• If your wife hasn't the foggiest idea what you do at work
• If you spend more on your home computer than your car
• If you know what http:// stands for
• If you've ever tried to repair a $5 radio
• If you have a neatly sorted collection of old bolts and nuts in your garage
• If your favorite part of the 6 o clock news is comparing their latest satellite weather picture with yours
• If your three-year-old son asks why the sky is blue and you try to explain atmospheric absorption theory
• If your lap-top computer costs more than your car If your 4 basic food groups are: 1. Caffeine 2. Fat 3. Sugar 4.Chocolate