| Chapter Thirteen Howie leaned down and gently pressed his lips to hers, her body heated and fire raced through her veins. Her arms went up around his neck and back pulling him closer to her. She couldn't get enough of him, he was the air she breathed and without him she couldn't live. The tender words of love pouring from his lips had her heart swelling with love in return. Kat lifted away from his lips to stare into his eyes. She wanted so badly to tell him she felt the same, but the words wouldn't come. As she struggled with her voice, Howie began to fade away. She cried out and clutched her arms tighter only to find she was grasping air. Frantically she glanced around, trying in vain to find him. Her heart was beating faster and faster and it was becoming harder to breathe. She opened her mouth to scream his name and once again her voice failed her. Kat sat up in bed, Howie's name falling from her lips. Her chest heaved in aggitation and sweat broke out on her forehead. She sat starring at the opposite wall, her body shivering uncontrollably. In bits and pieces the dream returned to her. Just like that, the feelings of pleasure and desire swamped her, causing her breath to catch in her throat. She could hear his whispered words of love and devotion and her heart pounded heavily beneath her breast. It seemed to say with every beat that Howie loved her, would always love her and he would never betray her. She waited for her mind to start up its side of the argument, but it never came. Realization of what she almost lost flooded her. How could she willingly walk away from the one man whom she loved? How would she survive? Instinctively she knew, that yes, she would be able to function in her daily tasks, but if she didn't find a way to apologize it would be no different than if she truly did die. Her life would cease having meaning. The rest of the night was spent sitting up against the headboard, hugging her knees and praying it wasn't to late. ~~~****~~~ As soon as the sun was up over the horizon, Kat was in the bathroom getting ready for the day. She showered and dressed quickly and rushed down the stairs to say a quick good bye to Kel before rushing out the door. She knew she didn't look her best, there were large dark circles under her eyes, giving her the appearance of a raccoon. Her clothes were just thrown on and her hair was pulled back into a messy bun. After all, what did her appearance matter when she might be losing the love of her life. The drive to Howie's hadn't been long enough to ease her fears, but she straightened her spine and forced herself out of the car and up the walk way. Had it only been yesterday that she had arrived in Orlando to surprise him? Only yesterday that she'd pulled up in front of this very house, eagerness and anticipation making her heart race? How could she not have let him explain? How could she not have trusted him? She shook her head, clearing her thoughts as she rang the doorbell. She had to ring it several more times before she heard Howie's muffled voice saying he was coming. She steeled herself when the door opened, not knowing what kind of reception she was going to get. Would he take one look at her and slam the door in her face or would he invite her in? It was to much to hope for that he'd take one look at her and pull her into his arms right where she desperately wanted to be. As it turned out, he silently stepped back for her to enter. He looked as bad as she did and guilt swamped her. She'd done that to him, by not trusting him. She didn't think there was much left of her heart to shatter, but there it went, even the smallest pieces splintering into a thousand more pieces. She turned and looked up at him, neither saying a word. There were so many things she wanted to say, so much apologizing she had to do, but she couldn't get her brain to work. All of her attention was centered on him and how sad his eyes looked. Without thinking, she stepped forward and raised her hand to cup his face. Her thumb stroked over his cheekbone and his eyes slid closed. She clinched her eyes tight and the tears that had been just beneath the surface overflowed onto her cheeks. "I'm sorry " she sobbed as she started to withdraw her hand. His hand rose to stay hers and he turned his cheek into her palm, giving himself over to her care. That act, so trusting, brought more tears to her eyes. "Shh" he whispered as he pulled her into his arms. Kat buried her head into the cove of his shoulder and neck and inhaled his scent. Combined with his hands gently stroking her back, slowly her tears subsided and she pulled away so she could look him in the eyes. "I was so foolish. I can't believe I almost tossed away something as precious as your love" she said as her fingers gripped his upper arms. "I don't know how you could ever forgive me for not trusting you, but I came here to ask it anyways. Can you ever forgive me Howie?" she asked, tears threatening to spill over again. "It's alright. It was just a misunderstanding" he said as he brushed his lips over her forehead. "No, its not alright. Saying its alright says you condone my behaivor, the way I acted and reacted, and I'm not proud of the things I did or said. Saying you forgive me let's me know that you acknowledge I was wrong and that we can put it behind us and go on. Can you do that?" she asked timidly. Howie let her words sink in and he saw the wisdom in them. "Yes, I can do that. I forgive you Kat" he said as he lowered his lips to hers and branded her with his touch. His arms tightened around her back and his tongue slipped inside her mouth, to taste and to claim. A low moan rose from the depths of her body, and her arms pulled him in closer. She was so thankful that she had him back. In less than twenty-four hours she'd nearly lost him and now that she had him back she wasn't willing to let go. If she could have crawled inside him, she still wouldn't have been close enough. She moaned his name as his lips left hers to trail a hot firey path down her neck. Heat pooled deep in his loins as his name fell from her lips. He bent and put an arm behind her knees and picked her up, carrying her to his room. He gently laid her on the bed and tugged her shoes off before laying down next to her. He pulled her into his arms and gently kissed her when she began to protest. "Shh Kat. Just sleep" he said as he pushed her head down onto his shoulder. He waited tense minutes until the hardness of his body eased and Kat fell asleep. As much as he wanted to bury himself in her, he knew that he would be taking advantage of her emotional state. He didn't want their first time to be shadowed by harsh words, he wanted their first time to be something special, tender, and full of love. He wanted it to be perfect, right down to candlelight and soft music. He ran his hands through her hair and kissed the top of her head. The events of the last twenty-four hours had shown him that he really did love her. He had yet to say it, but he wasn't going to wait long. Before he left on tour she would know what lay in his heart. With that thought floating through his head and a contented smile on his face he allowed himself to fall asleep. Reunion Index Next Chapter Main Page |