Determining Formality for Your Wedding
Getting Started Checklist
You’ve just gotten engaged and you’re overwhelmed. The first thing you need to do is get a good sense of the type of wedding you and your future spouse wants. The following questions serve as a guideline for discussion. In addition to answering the questions, it’s important to decide on the importance of each issue. This will help with the compromising that is sure to come later!
1. Do you want the traditional wedding/reception, or something different such as private ceremony and larger reception, or destination wedding and party afterwards?
2. Do you want the reception to be: indoor, outdoor, indoor/outdoor? If you want outdoor only, how will rain and bathrooms be handled?
3. Do you want an afternoon or evening wedding? Formal or informal?
4. Do you want traditional reception (i.e. receiving line, toasts, first dance, garter and bouquet throwing etc.) or just a party?
5. Do you want a wedding party or just one person to stand up with you? What is the maximum size of the party? Does the number of bridesmaids have to equal the number of groomsmen?
6. Do you have a maximum number of guests you will accept?
7. Do you want dancing?
8. Do you want live music or a dj?
9. Do you want sit down dinner, buffet dinner, or just standing reception?
10. Do you want everyone in one room during the meal or can they be seated in several rooms?
11. Do you want kids at the wedding? How do you envision their participation – hanging out with their parents or separate entertainment provided for them?
12. What kind of setting do you want: mansion, gardens, hotel, on the water?
13. Who do you want to perform the ceremony?
14. Where to you want the ceremony, church or reception site?
15. How far from the reception to the wedding site will you accept?
16. If you live in a large city, how far from the city will you accept as the site?
17. What is the maximum you want to pay for the site rental?
18. What is the maximum you want to pay for the wedding?
20. What is your total budget?
21 Will anyone help you with expenses or will you have to pay for the wedding yourself?
Wedding Plans at a Glance
Wedding Date:
Time:
Officiant:
Ceremony Location:
Reception Location:
Honeymoon Location(s):
# Guests invited (Ceremony):
# Guests invited (Reception):
Total Budget:
Style:
Formality:
Color Scheme:
Theme:
Bridal Party -
# of Bridal Attendants:
# of Grooms men:
# of Ushsers::
# of Flowergirls:
# of Trainbearers:
# of Ringbearers:
Events
Engagement Party
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Bridal Shower #1
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Bridal Shower #2
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Bridal Luncheon
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Bachelorette Party
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Bachelor Party
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Wedding Rehearsal
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Rehearsal Dinner
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Other Event
Date:
Time:
Location:
Notes:
Wedding Budget Checklist
Stationery
Invitations Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Announcements Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Thank you's Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Reception napkins Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Matches Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Cake Boxes Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Calligraphy Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Other__________ Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Flowers
Reception Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Ceremony Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Attendants' bouquets Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Mothers' Corsages Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Buffet decorations Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Table centerpieces Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Cake table Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Bandstand Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Other ___________ Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Photography
Formal Portraits Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Candids Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Extra Prints Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Photo Albums Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Other _________ Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Music
Wedding (organist, soloist) Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Reception (band, D.J.) Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Catering
Bridesmaids' party Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Bachelor party Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Rehearsal dinner Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Reception Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Food Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Liquor Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Waitstaff, bartender, etc. Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Wedding Cake Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Bridal Outfit
Dress Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Headpiece and veil Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Shoes Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Jewelry Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Other __________ Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Miscellaneous Fees
Church donation Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Coordinator Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Ceremony assistants Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Wedding rings Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Gifts
Attendants Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Bride and Groom Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Parents Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Favors Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Other _________ Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Transportation
Limosines Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Parking Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Extras Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Hotel Rooms (guests, attendants) Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Other___________ Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
TOTAL Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Total Cost of the Wedding? Estimated Cost_________ Actual Cost _________
Book before 3 months:
Honeymoon
Tuxedos
Rings
Rehearsal Dinner
Limo
Undergarments/Shoes
Hair Stylist
Makeup Artist
Manicure/Pedicure
Bridesmaid Luncheon
Fountains/Ice Sculptures
Calligraphy
Book or buy before 2 months:
Favors
Guest Book
Unity Candle
Gifts to Wedding Party, Parents, Spouse
Garter
Cake Knife/Server
Toasting Goblets
Ring Bearer Pillow
Balloons
Aisle Runner
Ring Engraving
Birdseed, Petals, Bubbles
2 weeks before ceremony:
Physical/Blood Test
Marriage License
Final Fitting
Flower and Gown Preservation
Car Decorations
By the 2 week mark, everything should be done. This gives you 2 weeks to tie up loose ends and relax
The Official New Bride Name Change Kit is a consolidated, easy-to-use kit for the new bride, customized to bride's state and zip code. The kit contains all required government forms, personal record change forms, and instruction guide and checklist to help you change from your maiden name to your new married name.
Very Formal A very formal wedding would be more likely to take place in a church, synagogue or prestigious hotel than in a garden. This is usually for two hundred or more guests and can take place at noon, in the afternoon or after six o'clock p.m. for an evening wedding. Some characteristics of a very formal wedding would include: engraved invitations; semi-formal dress for guests with formal attire for the wedding party (including a long train and veil and full bouquet for the bride); a sit-down dinner or festive buffet; dancing to an orchestra; elaborate decorations including floral centerpieces; a large wedding party (four to twelve bridesmaids); and formal photography with set-up shots as well as candids. A very formal wedding is generally the most expensive option available to you.
Formal The ceremony could be held in a church, synagogue, hotel, a home, garden, or one of the many sites suggested under site selection such as a historic building or clubhouse. Traditionally, a formal wedding is for one hundred guests or more. A formal wedding would include: formal invitations; a bridal gown but less formal attire for attendants; a meal (but perhaps a luncheon or simple buffet); dancing to a band; floral arrangements in a church or at the head table; a medium-sized wedding party (two to six bridesmaids); and professional photography.
Semi-Formal Locations for semi-formal wedding can be more varied and a single location for ceremony and reception is more common for a semi0formal wedding. This style of wedding would include one hundred or less guests. Invitations can be simple, without inserts and return cards; dress is less formal, with the bride perhaps wearing a less elaborate dress (floor length or shorter); food may be in the form of a simple buffet; dancing to a DJ, simple decorations, a smaller wedding party (one or two bridesmaids) and mostly candid photography with a few setup shots.
Casual or Informal Locations are unlimited. Guests can be limited to family members and very close friends. Invitations could be as simple as a phone call or personal invitation; dress is casual with the bride wearing a street length dress or suit; food might be limited to cake with punch or champagne or perhaps cocktails and hors d'oeuvres; entertainment is optional; decorations are optional; the wedding party may consist of a maid or matron of honor and best man only; and a personal friend may be responsible for capturing the event with a camera. An informal or casual wedding is probably the least expensive wedding option.