You might be from Upstate NY if . . .

You define summer as three months of bad sledding or a weekend of 90 degrees;
You think that people from Pennsylvania have an accent;
Your idea of a seven course meal is a six pack of Genny and a bucket of Buffalo wings;
You believe that "down south" means New Jersey;
You have experienced frostbite and sunburn in the same week;
You know that Utica not only exists, but that it isn't far from Hell;
Your favorite holidays are Christmas, Thanksgiving, and the opening of deer season;
Your snowmobile, lawn mower, and fishing boat all have big block Chevy engines;
Your year has two seasons: winter and construction;
Half the change in your pocket is Canadian, eh;
From May to October there is a festival every weekend celebrating a different fruit, vegetable, or agricultural product;
Every vehicle you own has a ski rack or a gun rack or a trailer hitch for the snowmobiles;
You experience spring as three days and a weekend that rains;
You spend winter mumbling about moving to Florida and autumn bragging about not being able to find a better place in the world to live;
If your car ever appeared to be salt white;
If you spend more money in car washes than on underwear;
If your car ever froze solid and you couldn't open the doors;
If you ever had to say, "No, I am not from the city."
If you have a friend in the Highway Dept. that promises to give you tons of deer meat;
You amuse "out of state people" with winter stories;
You drove through a blizzard at least twice in a winter;
If you can say Lake Effect and take it seriously;
If when you make it home you need a hot cocoa instead of a cold beer, since you had to shovel the snow out of your driveway for an hour;
Rock salt forms part of your grocery shopping list;
If as soon as you leave downtown you can smell manure;
If you think that Buffalo, Rochester, or Syracuse are BIG cities;
If you still have winter tires on in May;
If you go to the town dump to watch the bears;
If you've seen black flies thicker than molasses;
If you've been to car races...on the frozen lake;
The only club you belong to is Utica Club.

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