Sunday, October 12th, 2003 - Funny Verses

I ran into yet another funny verse yesterday, so I got the random idea to post verses that, in context, may not be all that funny; however, when taken by themselves, they make me laugh. Side note - these are from the New Living Translation (NLT).

I'll start off with the one I read yesterday. "Then the prophet turned to another man and said, 'Strike me!' So he struck the prophet and wounded him." 1 Kings 20:37

"Anything you eat passes through the stomach and then goes out of the body." Matthew 15:17

"Ostriches will live among the ruins, and wild goats will come there to dance." Isaiah 13:21b

"Love her as the Lord loves the Israelites, though they turn to other gods and love the sacred raisin cakes." Hosea 3:1 (NIV - italics mine)

"Elisha left Jericho and went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, a group of boys from the town began mocking and making fun of him.... Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of them." 2 Kings 2:23-24

"As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly." Proverbs 26:11

"Do not eat anything you find already dead. You may give it to an alien living in any of your towns, and he may eat it, or you may sell it to a foreigner." Deuteronomy 14:21(NIV)

"I wish you'd shut your mouths -- silence is your only claim to wisdom." Job 13:5 (MSG)

"he and his men went out and killed two hundred Philistines and presented all their foreskins to the king." 1 Samuel 18:27 - perhaps the most disgusting verse I have ever read.

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