I can't believe they actually got me into a tux. I swear, if it were anyone but them, I'da told em to kiss my ass and not thought twice. But...it's them. Adam and Jay. My best friends, brothers really, and god knows I've never been able to tell either of em no. So here I am in a goddamn penguin suit feeling like the biggest dork to walk the earth.
It doesn't help that Adam's mom keeps telling me how 'handsome' I look. I'm Sinn, woman, I'm not supposed to look 'handsome', I'm supposed to look dark and intimidating and slightly whacked in the head. Sigh. The things I do for those two.
I'm sitting here in the foyer of Adam's mom's house, watching everybody run around like fucking chickens with their heads cut off, but hey, it's mildly amusing to see a grown man wigging out over the fact that the florist delivered carnations instead of lilies. I don't think I'd even know the difference.
Although, to be fair to Jay, if I was about to marry the man I loved and that man was Adam and Adam wanted lilies...? I might have wigged out too. Sigh. You'd think two years would have killed any remaining feelings I might have for Adam. And it has, for the most part. But...something about today is bringing it all back in a big way. Maybe it's the finality of marriage...Adam is officially and forever and always gonna belong to Jay after today. That's pretty final.
Aw, don't go getting all choked up thinking I've been pining or anything. Not even close. Adam and Jay have gone and are in the process of making a huge name for themselves in the WWF, I've been working my ass off in the indies and having a damn good time at it, let me tell you. Plenty of groupies following around, wanting a little taste of Sinn. And I'm more than happy to give it to em.
Still, that don't mean I'm not just the littlest bit jealous of what Adam and Jay have...it's pretty damn special, even to a cynic like me. And the fact that I, not to toot my own horn, had a hand in getting them to this day...well, it's nice. I'm happy for em, love em both more than almost anyone on the planet and I'm happy for em. That don't mean I can't still be just a little nostalgic and entertain a couple what-if scenarios, ya know?
"Nicholas?" I gotta cringe at that...even my own mom doesn't call me by my full name anymore. I look up to see Jay's mom standing over me, wringing the little lace handkerchief in her hands like it's a neck she'd like to be strangling.
"Yeah, Mrs. Reso?" Gotta be polite, she's been like a second or third mom to me and my own mother would kick my ass if I wasn't polite. Not that, you know, I'm scared of my mom or anything...
"Nicholas, can you run outside and give the valets a hand? Two of their men didn't show up and the guests are backing up..." she looks like she might burst into tears any second from the stress and, much as I seriously dislike being relegated to car parking duty, I stand up, patting her hand consolingly.
"Sure thing...don't worry about it, I'll handle it." Waving off her thank-you's, I take off my jacket, laying it across the back of the chair there in the foyer and head outside to see what's going on.
Sure enough, there's a line of about 5 cars and 2 very harried looking valets in red coats running back and forth like, again, chickens with their heads cut off. Great.
Putting on my best intimidating ring face, I take control of the situation, directing each of the two guys and, pretty soon, we have it down to a science and the cars are moving along very nicely. I barely glance up as another car pulls up to the gate, ripping off a little ticket and handing it through the driver's window.
"Just give that to the guy down there and keep the stub."
"Thanks...you must be Nick..."
Whoa. My eyes snap up at that soft, low, thick drawl, locking with a pair of the most brilliant emerald eyes I've ever seen. Again I say…whoa.
"Yeah..." Wondering how he knows who I am. I know who he is. If the black painted fingernails and sweet southern drawl didn't give it away, the red and blue hair spilling over the collar of his suit jacket would. Jeff Hardy. The WWF's resident high-flyer and Adam and Jay's current in-ring rival...along with his older brother.
He grins at me, a lopsided grin that reveals a dimple in his left cheek...kinda reminds me of Adam's dimple, except...not. "Ah'm Jeff..."
I nod, suddenly speechless and I swear I want to kick myself for not being able to come up with a single intelligent thing to say. Jesus, Nick, he's a fucking kid, get a grip on yourself! "I know." Damn. That sounded rude even to my own ears.
Apparently to his too, because his grin fades and he looks away. "Kay...nice to meet you. Ah'll see ya later, I guess."
Nothing to do now but nod dumbly. "Yeah."
I watch the sleek black Corvette head down the drive and, as soon as I'm fairly certain he's out of earshot, let loose a string of curses that would have my mom running for the soap. Way to make a great impression, Nick, very smooth, a regular Don fucking Juan. Not that, you know, he's my type anyway...I tend to like em at least legal. That one's what, 20 if he's a day? 19? Jailbait.
Fucking gorgeous though. But nah...jailbait.
*********************
I don't think I've ever seen either of em looking more beautiful. Jay's standing at the end of the aisle with the preacher, looking about as nervous as anybody I've ever seen, but as soon as Adam appears at the other end, with his mom's arm on his elbow, the nervousness just flows right out of Jay and I swear you can *see* the love just shooting between em. It's enough to make even a bastard like me get a little mushy inside.
Adam....well, Adam is his normal breathtaking gorgeous self, but today he has this kind of inner glow that just takes him to a whole other level of beauty. His hair's falling down around his shoulders (Jay likes it down, can't say I blame him) and his new platinum highlights are glinting in the sun. He's wearing a dark blue suit that, even from here, brings out his gorgeous eyes and makes em almost glow. Damn...if I didn't know how perfect he and Jay are together, I'd be half-tempted to get up from this chair, grab Adam over my shoulder and make a break for it.
Instead I sit here with everyone else, watching them as Adam approaches, their eyes locked, and it's like there's nobody else in the world but them and their love. And this is exactly why, even though I still sometimes think about Adam in that way, I can still be happy for them. It's impossible not to be affected by that kind of just pure, perfect, amazing love.
I sigh under my breath as the preacher begins the ceremony, looking away and casting my gaze around the crowd of guests around me. Suddenly I'm caught in a pair of warm, jade eyes that are locked on me. Jeff. I wonder briefly how long he's been watching me, hoping he didn't see any of the nostalgia that I'm sure was pretty apparent on my face just now.
He really is just gorgeous. Hair that should be obnoxious with it's rainbow colors but instead fits him perfectly, not looking the least bit out of place. Soft-looking, pale skin that I find myself wanting to touch just to see if it's as soft as it looks. And that mouth...my god, I thought Adam had perfect lips, but...that is the most gorgeous, lush mouth I've ever seen.
It takes me a second to realize that he's smiling knowingly at me, and if I wasn't the man I am, I might blush. That's another thing...he can't be more than 19 or 20, but he's got some seriously old eyes. Not old, like as in wrinkled and shit...old like as in wise, like he's seen and understands way more than he should at his age. He cocks one brow at me and grins. Damned if I don't just look away like I wasn't caught ogling him.
What the hell is wrong with me? I can't believe I'm getting so damn flustered and all caught up over some kid with sno-cone hair and painted fingernails. Just cut it out, Nick, just get through this day and get your ass back on the road with the groupies who don't make you tremble and who don't have too-old for their years emerald eyes. Yeah.
*********************
I swear somebody needs to tell Jay never to dance again...the man has less rhythm than Steven Segal at a rave. Still, Adam's just grinning down at him, thinking it's just the cutest thing he's ever seen, I'm sure. And that's how you know he's a fucking fool in love, because if *anything* is less than cute, it's Jay trying to dance. Dork.
Of course, they've been trying to get me on the dance floor for the past half hour...yeah, right, not gonna happen, thanks anyway. I *did* however, cut in for 2.5 seconds to get my kiss with the "bride"...kinda wish I hadn't, though, cuz that chaste little peck didn't in any way resemble the scorching heat of the Adam kisses I remember. Man, what the fuck am I even doing, he's Jay's, they're in love, I'm happy for them, why is it so fucking hard to get my head wrapped around that info?
"Nick?"
Look up and am met with those shockingly green eyes again. Gonna try really hard not to be an ass here and run him off...he's awfully pretty, I might like to get to know him a little if I can just turn off my asshole switch and be civil. "Hey." There, that was good, hardly any snarkiness in my tone at all.
Apparently I succeeded in not sounding like a jerk, cuz Jeff smiles and sits down in the chair next to me. He doesn't say anything, just tips back his drink, iced tea I think, considering he probably isn't old enough to really drink, and looks out at the people on the dance floor.
Suddenly he lets out a laugh, this low, velvety sound that just sends sparks shooting down my spine. Wow. "Oh mah god...do ya think if we paid him, Jay would stop dancing??"
I chuckle, shaking my head. "I don't think so...he's convinced he's Fred fucking Astaire when he's had a few drinks."
Jeff laughs again, turning that brilliant grin on me. "It's painful to watch!"
"I know...believe me, I've been watching since junior high dances. He just gets worse, believe it or not."
Our mutual laughter trails off and, just as I'm giving myself a mental pat on the back for bein' so smooth with the kid, he turns to me and, out of nowhere, grabs my hand.
"Dance with me!" He sounds like a little kid, grinning and hopping up from his chair as a slower, heavy-beat song begins. Sounds like Pearl Jam. I can never remember the names of bands, but I'm pretty sure that's who it is.
"Oh no...uh-uh, kid." He's just looking at me, and where did he get the idea that cocking his head just a little bit and nibbling on that full lower lip was the way to get his way? Damn. It's workin' too. "Aw, come on...I'm worse than Jay, ya know."
He just grins wider. "Ah very much doubt that. Ah'd say you probably have a hell of a rhythm..."
Well hell...he just let that sentence trail off and my dirty little mind picks it right up and runs with it. There oughtta be some kind of law against boys like him...though it probably wouldn't stop me as I get to my feet and allow him to lead me to the dance floor. I always did like to break the rules.
***************************
I haven't the faintest idea how we ended up in this position...one breathless, whimpering, beautiful Jeff Hardy pressed back against the wall in Adam's old bedroom, me pressed right up against him, kissing the fuck out of that sinfully gorgeous mouth. Ha. Sinfully. Make that Sinn-fully.
He's got his hands in my hair and one long leg hooked high on my hip, writhing against me, every rough brush of his cock through his pants against mine stealing my breath and making me bite his lower lip a little harder than I intend to. He doesn't seem to mind, in fact he seems to like it...a lot, if the sounds he's making in the back of his throat are any indication.
God, he's making me crazy...this is crazy...I can't fuck him right here in Adam's mom's house with a reception going on downstairs and about two hundred people milling about. Somebody could walk in any minute. Somehow, though, when Jeff tears his mouth from mine and arches his head back with this insanely sexy moan...I could care less if somebody walks in...let em. I gotta have him, now.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on your perspective, just as I turn him and start walking him back towards the bed, still kissing him silly, there's voices in the hall outside and we freeze, locked in that compromising position, holding our breaths as the voices draw closer.
"You sure you saw him come up here?"
Fuck. Adam. Oh fuck!
"Yeah, I'm sure. He hasn't been himself all day, babe...you think he's still...you know?" Jay. Double fuck.
"In love with me? Nah, come on, Jay, you know that's so far over it ain't even funny. He probably just had a few too many drinks and forgot where the bathroom is." a low chuckle. "Bet he's passed out up here somewhere."
I look down at Jeff, who's emerald eyes are wide, his lips all kinds of swollen and damp from my tongue and I feel the insane urge to say fuck it and go right back to making him mine.
But I can't, I know that. Damn it. I pull away from Jeff slowly, reaching out to brush his hair, tangled from my hands, back behind his ear, letting my fingers trail lightly across his jaw as I do and smile at the shiver that evokes. I like that...like that he's so damn responsive to me.
"Later." I murmur, bending to drop a short kiss on his tempting mouth.
He shivers again and nods, stepping back and smoothing his clothes as I do the same. Finally, with a look at each other, we head to the door. I take a deep breath before swinging it open, pasting a grin on my face as Adam and Jay turn abruptly and stare at me.
"Hey. Whatcha doin'...bailing on your own party cuz ya couldn't wait to get nekkid?" Waggling my brows as they blush.
Adam grins, then his grin falters when Jeff appears behind me. "Nah...we were looking for you, thought you mighta passed out or something."
I chuckle, rolling my eyes. "Hey, unlike you, lightweight, I can hold my liquor. Nah, just got a little bored and decided to give Jeff here a little tour of the house."
Adam looks to Jeff as if to confirm my story and Jeff, bless him, grins like we weren't just 2 seconds away from carnal bliss. "Yeah...nice teddy bear collection, Adam."
And that quick, any suspicion that might have been in their minds is gone and we all head back downstairs, Adam defending his rather large collection of teddies (he swears it's cuz they're vintage or something), Jay laughing right along with me and Jeff.
At the foot of the stairs, I pause, and Jeff stops a few feet away, looking back at me with a questions in his eyes. I just grin at him, wink and mouth the word "later", to which he shivers a little, nods and turns to follow the still defensive Adam and the still laughing Jay back into the reception.
Yeah. Later. Right now, I gotta see my two best friends in the world off on their honeymoon. And for the first time all day, I'm not thinking about what might have been. I'm thinking about what's gonna be. That's nice. Real nice.
