Deliverance

This is the movie that did more ruin the reputation of grizzled mountain men than all of country music combined. It begins as an ecology flick. A river is going to be dammed which is BAD. It's going to drown several towns and RUIN THE ENVIRONMENT. So four men decide to canoe down the river before it is dammed because they want to see it in its NATURAL BEAUTY which is GOOD AND WONDERFUL.

The four men are a rarely seen creature in buddy flicks. They each have distinct personalities and you have no trouble remembering their names! They are:

Lewis: Burt Reynolds in a rare mustache-less performance. He is a heroic nature man who transforms into a whining load at the bottom of a canoe.

Drew: A preacher-looking guitar player who has a Moral Quandary. He is also the guitar half of the famous "Dueling Banjoes" scene.

Bobby: A sheriff-looking fellow who is constantly left behind. The weakest part of the foursome.

Ed: The man who is out for revenge. Watch out for this one. He's mean.

After several days of watching them canoe down a river in its NATURAL GLORY, we come to the Classic Deliverance Scene. I need say no more about that.

After eight more days of the CDS, the movie sharply changes course and becomes a safety film. We all learn that while going canoeing, one must wear a lifejacket because if you don't, you will become suicidal and die and that is selfish because it complicates the already weighty problems of your friends.

Taking its cue from the pretzel twist that is Wild Things, the movie becomes a gritty survival film in which Our Hero must get to the top of a rock, kill a man, and get back down. Once he arrives at the bottom, the movie becomes a murder mystery. Ultimately the small-town sheriff doesn't give a damn because the town's going to be underwater in a few days anyway. (HAHAHA! I made a funny! Or did I....). Let's hear it for Southern indifference!

All in all, not bad. I could have lived the rest of my life very happily without seeing the CDS. As it is, I followed the teachings of a holy man and considered the lilies of the valley. They toiled not, nor did they spin. Truly a lesson for us all.

Cat Treats: 3.5

½ Point Subtracted For: CDS

Scene to Avoid: CDS

Most Quoted Line: "You got a real purty mouf."

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