WAYNE BRADY ROCKS THE MEGACITY
A Full Report by Emile Jumean
(Massey Hall, Toronto, ON, June 7, 2002)

Well gang, I've been home since about 1:00 this afternoon (June 9) and I'm still on a Wayne Brady high after his fantastic show on Friday at Massey Hall in T.O. The four of us (me, DevilTracy, JeffyB and his girlfriend Vicky) arrived at the theatre around 7:30, and went to our seats, located in the Right Balcony, section G, in the middle of the row. Pretty nice view of the stage. Although the pix I took from there didn't turn out well at all, which I completely expected. After all, we were way too far from the stage for the flash to be any good. Mind you, a few of the pix turned out reasonably well (pretty grainy, but you could still tell what it was).

Anyway here's roughly what took place during the show...I made notes at the Hard Rock Cafe, *after* the show had finished, and I'm quite amazed that we remembered this much of it. :-) Just so you know, this was mainly a musical show, which personally I did not mind one bit, since that is Wayne's forte, and we were definitely NOT disappointed.

The show began roughly ten minutes late, about 8:10. Carla Collins (I think that was her name, I remember she had a show on TCN called Chez Carla) came on to introduce the show and told us Wayne would be out shortly. After another few minutes, "the friends of Wayne Brady" came out to get suggestions for the various things Wayne would be doing throughout the show. Various unusual words, film and theatre styles, finishing off titles of songs, that sort of thing. Of course, the balcony people were completely and utterly ignored, though I did try in vain to shout out various things.

Wayne came out on stage (to wild applause) and started into a gangsta rap number using the various odd words that were suggested earlier. Some of the words that were used that I can remember were heater, beans, kangaroo, convergence and androgenous. I mean just using these words in his rap was good enough, but actually making them rhyme was phenomenal! :-)

He then went into the audience to choose someone to sing to. He chose this sweet little old lady in the front row called Ruth, who was a retired computer operator for payroll, or something like that. He sang it as an R&B number, and Ruth helped Wayne sing a bit, which was adorable. :) Even though it was more like a squeak. Wayne also cracked up during the game, when he was way off on how many grandchildren Ruth had.


The next game Wayne did was one called Bedtime Story, wherein he told a bedtime story to his "son", about a certain topic, then at different points a new film / tv style would be chosen to continue his story in. The story was about rabid dogs, and some of the styles I recall were western, horror, film noir, action, romance, mafia, sci-fi, South Park and of course porno (surprisingly, not suggested by us!)



After that Wayne did sound effects with an audience member (I can't remember the man's name), but what I do remember was that he was quite good at the sound effects. :) He had Wayne in stitches several times. The scene was "preparing for a date, and doing laundry".

Now at this point came a complete surprise to all of us. Wayne mentioned that a friend of his was in the audience tonight, he went on to describe his friend, and we finally discovered who it was. None other than Colin Mochrie!! Of course, we were freaking out, and the audience was going totally nuts. Wayne ran up to Colin and gave him a big hug. Unfortunately, Colin didn't take part in anything, he was just there as a viewer. :-)


Anyway, next was a version of the game "Greatest Hits", which was a bit different. One of the "friends of Wayne Brady" (I can't remember his name) presented a top ten countdown of the latest hits, and the majority of the songs that Wayne performed, weren't just made up. They were actual improvised parodies of artists' songs. To give you an idea, here's most of the songs he performed...

When Lawyers Cry, as Prince (to the tune of When Doves Cry)
Osama, as Barry Manilow (to the tune of Mandy)
Banana Lovin' as Ozzy Osborne (not sure what the original song was)
Smells Like Wet Dog as Nirvana (to the tune of Smells Like Teen Spirit)
I Love You But You're Ugly as Elvis Presley (to the tune of Can't Help Falling In Love With You)
Where Is Kathy Lee Gifford as Aaron Neville (to the tune of I Don't Know Much)
Time Of The Month as Shaggy (again, not sure what the original tune was)
Remember The Cow as a country artist
I Love Your Smelly Feet as a Latin artist

LOL, the band misinterpreted that last one as a "Rappin'" artist, and started a very slow heavy rap beat. Wayne stood there looking at them probably thinking, what the hell are you doing? :-) Of course, he breaks up, the countdown guy breaks up, the audience breaks up. :-)


Anyway, after this gut-busting game, Wayne did his tribute to other singers, with a couple girls dancing behind him. I think I remember all of them: Stevie Wonder ("I Wish"), Louis Armstrong ("Wonderful World"), Sam Cooke ("You Send Me", where he promptly went right back to Ruth in the audience and sang to her again)...he also did his Sammy Davis Jr., James Brown (with the wig) and Michael Jackson (with the gloved hand). LOL, when he started into his Michael Jackson routine, his gloved hand kept trying to reach down towards his crotch, and he kept pushing it back up, smacking and scolding it. OMG, I was completely cracking up. He also called one of the dancing girls Janet, and the other Tito (who then promptly gave Wayne a smack). He started into a parody of "I'll Be There" ("You and I must make a pact, I must get my pigment back...", "...wherever there is sun, I won't be there...") Halfway through the song he stopped, started sobbing, then said "I miss Bubbles", then he finished off with the real song.


After that, he did a small encore by doing another song (I can't remember which artist he was doing, I think it was Boys II Men, but I am not completely sure.) The people in the audience were on their feet, clapping and dancing. Finally Wayne went offstage, to tremendous applause, then returned once again. And just like that, the show was over.

Post-show, the four of us (me, Trace, JeffyB and Vicky) went around the corner of Massey Hall to await Rob who was meeting us afterwards. Also, across the street was the stage entrance, where we were hoping both Colin and Wayne would show up. There was a surprisingly small group of people gathered by the doors, maybe 15 or so. After about 10 minutes, Colin came out, we high-tailed it across the street (Toronto traffic be damned!) to greet him. We got pictures and autographs, and talked a bit. I was amazed that he still remembered my name, seeing as I last saw him at Con 1999. I still remember my brief exchange...



Colin: Hey Emile! You've grown a lot since I saw you last.
Emile: Yeah! Now I have hair!
Colin: (stares jokingly) ....Yeah. Is that a crack?




LOL, I was about ready to die at that point. Anyway, we told Colin about WhoserCon 5, and again invited him to attend. He did ask when it was, we told him July 5-7, but I don't think we got an answer to our original question. Oh well. After that, Colin left. A few minutes later, Wayne came out. Again, we all came up to him, got pictures and autographs. LOL, Wayne saw the WhoserCon 4 shirt I wore, and said, "Oh, you're a Whoser?" and I replied "Of course!" After I took my picture, I went back to where the others were gathered. Shortly after that, I returned to take a picture of JeffyB's girlfriend Vicky with Wayne, and I started talking with Wayne again. We actually had quite an intelligent conversation ... for my standards, LOL! I was thinking I'd end up being the demented Wayne fan who couldn't say anything other than "Wow! You're the greatest, Wayne!" :-)

Vicky was talking about how she had studied improv, and Wayne said that everyone should get into it. I told him I would love to, but where I live there is almost no one into the Improv scene. He asked where I live, I told him, Sarnia, Ontario. Which he then completely butchered the pronunciation of. ("Smarmia? Where's that?" LOL!) Afterwards, I explained to him where it was. Wayne then started talking about how he had been a huge fan of Whose Line before he appeared on it. I mentioned that back in 1998 I had attended one of his first WL tapings, the UK taping with Patrick Bristow, where he had serenaded Ashley on stage. He said, "Oh yeah! Ashley! She's getting married, isn't she?" I said that she was. He then mentioned the Whoser board, and I thanked him for taking the time to post there. I shook his hand, and then left to meet up with the rest of the guys. Upon thinking about it, I'm so glad I returned to take Vicky's picture with Wayne. If I didn't, I would never have struck up a conversation with him. And I probably would have been kicking myself now.



After we walked off, the five of us then went to the Hard Rock Cafe for a post-show snack(where we became the Village People / Idiots, courtesy of the hats that were provided us at Hard Rock). Then JeffyB drove us all back to our various destinations. And that was the end of a very long and very exciting day. One that I definitely will never forget. And to discover that Wayne is such a wonderful person. He was so easy to talk to, genuinely human, and seemed to be quite humble. :-)



That's about all I have to report. To end off, I just want to thank Wayne Brady personally...

Wayne:
Thank you so much for putting on such a spectacular show in Toronto. I don't think I've ever had so much fun in my life. You are an extremely talented person, and I hope you never give up what you do best. I always thought you were one of the nicest people in the world. And I'm glad I got the chance to finally meet you face to face, and to confirm that you indeed are one of the nicest people in the world. Take care, God bless you, and best of luck in everything you do.

Emile


And finally...a few choice quotes from the show, for posterity.

"If it sucks, *you* did it!"
Wayne: "Oh Ruth!" Ruth: "Oh baby!"
"(Godfather mumbling)....this is Mafia, right?"
"I miss Bubbles!"
"...2, with the exchange!" (*audience boos*)
"(as James Brown) Frere Jacques, huh! Dormez-vous, huh!"
"Latin! Not Rappin'!"

One more thing, you can find more (and larger) pix of my T.O. trip on my Yahoo! account. The URL for that is http://photos.yahoo.com/ejumean where you can then click on the "Wayne 2002" directory to find the pictures.

That's all folks!

Emile