Fern-Monologue

 

Sentimental Lovely Day

step out into green grass and daisies

reach up so high, it's like an ocean

ideal, precise

the view looks good from here

painted up high is the big blue sky

 

it's a sentimental lovely day

watching the rain

watching it all change

 

today I wear my very best clothes

so I can say that I respected

I've made my mind up

it's a sure thing

painted up high is the big blue sky

 

it's a sentimental lovely day

watching the rain

watching it all change

 

don't take me down

I don't want to go

I feel my best

I'm happy with the way it all works out

please let me stay...

 

Hold my Head

It could have been dust on the table

or something you said passing by

it could have been pictures of animals

or ways that you wanted to fly

 

hold my head I'm almost dead

pick me off the ground

patiently you've waited here

hold me with a smile

 

it could have been time that you wasted

or time that was never your own

it could have been some kind of feeling

or some day when you were alone

 

hold my head I'm almost dead

pick me off the ground

patiently you've waited here

hold me with a smile

 

I can't dream...

it's okay I can see...

for a while we could do anything but

take this time

to send them off one by one

for a while we could do anything....

 

Reach for Nothing

I've got my hands out

this is the first time

I'm going all out

you can consider

 

all of it done, in the cold air

in the open, in the sun

tear me open, reach for nothing

nothing lingers, in the shade

 

virtuous notions

I've got no paybacks

no sordid intent

you can consider

 

all of it done, in the cold air

in the open, in the sun

tear me open, reach for nothing

nothing lingers, in the shade

 

I'm on my way, I've always said

Some day I'll come around

near the end

and now I'm here

much earlier than I expected

 

Ponder

caught inside of our night

thinking up the same old lies

feeling tired, feeling tried

weary from the overkill

and everyone's talking, talking loud

I suggest we ponder

 

it's so cold lying here,

thinking of the way we are

running away from something pure

something worth our time and gain

and everyone's talking, talking loud

I suggest we ponder

 

images impressed in me

fanfare colors all around

creating a deceiving elegance

 

and I can't talk over this noise

and I can't share this peace of mine

if all you do is talk all night

I don't stand a chance tonight

maybe if you'd close your mouth

we could see the same

 

images impressed in me

fanfare colors all around

creating a deceiving elegance

 

Ready to Break

I've got a concept an inch from your face

it's taking place

but it's a million miles from your brain

I'd work with you but I'm ready to break

and I'm afraid that this temper would lead to rage

and there is nothing more to understand

if you don't get it now I don't think you ever will

 

I don't mind, I've got mine

and all the things you are just lose their size

I'll invest in myself

and all the things on which I can rely

 

you waste your time on mediocrity

meanwhile I've got a steady contrast for you

I'm so sick of all your trivial noise

you offer everything I threw away years ago

and there is nothing more to understand

if you don't get it now I don't think you ever will

 

I don't mind, I've got mine

and all the things you are just lose their size

I'll invest in myself

and all the things on which I can rely

 

ooh....I'm ready to break my hands are trembling

 

On Top of the Heavy

some kind of story man could preach to me some lies

some kind of rationale could lead me to some truth

some kind of bacchanalia could have me by a thread

some kind of alias involved could blind your eyes

 

on top of the heavy

tasting the day

wasting away

 

some kind of picturesque dream could be along

I could be having my way until it's gone

I don't believe in your front, you build it all yourself

some kind of nervousness, this could take you out

 

on top of the heavy

tasting the day

wasting away

 

it seems to me that I could only take it for a while

and miss the chance to be the one

that held out to the end

any way you take it back, it won't be what you had

 

some kind of broken hand could reach into my mind

some kind of wicked plan could tell me I'm the one

I'm sick of all this tasting, it leaves me wanting more

I wasn't bleeding, I never even cried

 

Hindsight

I'm going to crush your attempt to confound a perfect array

It irritates me to crash, and crowds my credence as well

bathetic words and cliches send questions spinning around

so senseless all your debates....I just can't even explain

 

hindsight is coming for now I'll just submit

hindrance has left to rot in a paper bag

waking up early, ready to kick myself

 

and I'll admit I'm distraught seeing your sadness in vain

watching you search and search

succumbing to mindless pressure

so senseless all your debates....I just can't even explain

 

hindsight is coming for now I'll just submit

hindrance has left to rot in a paper bag

waking up early, ready to kick myself

 

I will be waiting, I will be waiting....

 

Instilled

you go and curse the kiss that keeps me warm

and you've got a selfish awkwardness I sense

I see you're rushing to something

you've kind of lost your stance

you could've planned it all so well instead....

 

we're instilled with an ideal image

of a picture perfect way

in this temporal place I find it oh so crass

that we invest so much right here

 

you've got a mode that makes you seem so blithe

predicaments that fade and multiply

identical to nothing you never hesitate

you never start considering mistakes....

 

we're instilled with an ideal image

of a picture perfect way

in this temporal place I find it oh so crass

that we invest so much right here

 

please, please, please, please don't stay down

carry all this clout away

kiss, kiss, kiss me I'm on your side

please, please, please, please don't stay down

 

Yield

I could lean on my emotion

or just consider consequence

I could spend my time preparing

or let it all fall into place

and I could lie about what happens

or build my character with truth

I could take the path that I choose

or let the one above decide

 

I'm not the one to take this in my hands

to turn away and make my own plans

 

I could speak of plans to prosper

or find the wealth that fills the day

and I could always be the cynic

or find security in faith

I could say this talk is over

or try my hardest to forgive

and I could gratify with impulse

or benefit with time to come

 

I'm not the one to take this in my hands

to turn away and make my own plans

I'm not the one to judge the faces

to modify or alter this place

 

take it from my hands

I will yield to you

I will be resigned

take it from my mind

I will start again....again

 

The Other Side

I'm kicking around, twitching from sounds

that seem to be explosions in my head

and I don't know why I feel obliged

to let this thing control me as it does

I guess I'm a mess for being sincere

for reaching out so anxious at this chance

I wish you could see I'm all out of breath

from trying to distract you from yourself

 

please don't leave me out

my whole world is tumbling down

all I have is you

everyone is on the other side

 

I'm spinning around from all this advice

and choking on opinions that relate

it's not what you phrase or what you intend

it's how it comes across that makes it real

all these thoughts seem to be

shared by only me, I'm on my own

I wish I could express

I'm such a slave to this

and as I kneel I'm praying it's a phase

 

please don't leave me out

my whole world is tumbling down

all I have is you

everyone is on the other side

 

sorry I said hello, sorry I tried

sorry I spoke to soon, sorry you lied