The Anniversary – Designing A Nervous Breakdown
The muscle and bone -- they encase my heart but
never touch my soul. I'll save that for
the water and its shore, fear makes friends with joy. And I'll march slowly and I'll never forget how the music stopped
or the feel of your breath. The flesh
and the blood -- they keep my body warm but still my mind is cold. To know what's fair is not always fair, but
what proves real will never flee. And
I'll march slowly and I'll never forget how that black dress fell upon your
white neck. Grand Isle rests quiet this
time of year and I know you will be leaving soon my dear.
ALL THINGS ORDINARY
I've seen those eyes. I've watched them close at night. And you breathe in and you breathe out again. My sister's coming over and I'm afraid to
tell her the secrets that I know. Painting without colors, it tends to make it
better, it bleaches out the world. Was
it the end -- the end that kept you up till the morning? Was it the boy -- the
boy who stole you heart? Summer goes on and then dies quick without much
warning, all things ordinary. Will you stay near me now, don't leave this town,
until we've figured out, between the two of us we're strong enough -- I feel
that in your touch. Full from the
dinner but feeling somewhat thinner, aching in the chest. Kids behind the
windows, they're calling out the answers to questions never asked. I've seen those eyes. I've watched them close at night. And what
queen comes in -- always goes out again.
PERFECTLY
Turn down the headlights and look my way. We'll tell our parents the best of things,
no matter how awful they seem. The
sickness of a family. Trace your eyes
wake and retrieve, the morning sun can look so mean -- the color. Kiss your
head don't say a thing, we'll live forever in books darling. It's the secrets beneath the leaves I keep
with me. I'm falling up and down. And I'll never write the letter, I wish you
could read, the words perfectly.
THE D IN DETROIT
Feeling the time peel away at my life again. As memories combine, not sure where I've
ever been. Because it's the D in Detroit which scares me to no end. I'll count to ten. When living this down makes so much sense. We collide and onward we do fly, onward
until we hit again. I kept your
pictures locked behind the eye those weeks when our distance grew. Drove north where I found you waiting in Des
Moines and thanking God I'm not losing you.
And girl I hope you're not alone, and sleep through this weather. And girl I hope you're whole again, because
back home we'll sleep better.
EMMA DISCOVERY
Sound.
Mixed in with discovery, we found our ancient landmark to call
home. For this cold war my voice gets
dry -- place problems on a shelf to sit and die. Sent off my letter, a stapled picture, and one short prayer. And if I said that I've never cause an
argument, only a commotion, one million emotions -- would you still be
here? Sat on you roof, young in eighty-two,
how you remember is how it remains.
Turn down the light so that I can die, we'll always remember how we
remained. And how can I possibly
describe the way we looked back then? Because falling in love, whether or not
it lasts, there's truth in that. Under
the water things are much calmer. Under
the water there's streets and there's towers.
TILL WE EARNED A HOLIDAY
You're standing off the white church, pitching me
three words. It yells a name falling off my list of names. Those crashing lights, life is just like
that -- it's easy to forget. We make plans, and for the second I hit cold, as
the dirt black night grows close. Who
has been painting my roses red? I have
nothing to show for you now. I never wanted
to play the fool for you. The dead come
out as the beautiful ones are chosen.
To dance and shout, terrified, and holding onto the one an only thing
they ever had -- a heart that's not dead, but is dying in their hands. Why don't you, you ever get tan? You try and
try but you just don't. Your crying
eyes they start to bleed -- how come I can't get to sleep? Your smile grew thin as your family talked,
arrived singing just a holiday song that didn't stop until you drank too
much. How come I'm so out of touch?
SHU SHUBAT
Blood on the walls the curtain calls, you waited
there for no one at all. To the pine and oak trees that stand by your house,
and they keep on blowing south, to protect you through the winter. Surrounded.
You will never understand. Angel
with your broken wings, stop asking me to sing with those voices I just can't
find. A shame to be ashamed now I'm
ashamed, not smarter than the human brain, just smarter than humans. Lay down you arms, strong and unharmed, bend
and wave. On the cemetery lawn,
followed the sound straight through the ground.
WITHOUT PANASOS
It's never felt so hot within these walls, between
the cracks. As we forget our manners,
days slow down and I relapse. Dear Dad
-- I'm having trouble feeling sad. Your
words find secret pathways through my spine.
Inside my teeth I'll scream -- you know that I miss you, you know that I
miss you. Inside my teeth I'll scream
-- those diamond streets, invisible runways buried beneath. And I was wrong this time. Oh I was so wrong. Every other morning I wake up lost and tired from dreaming. As we distill our vision, nights grow long
and void of real meaning. And Dad you don't know the half of it this time. Buy
you told me what was yours would soon be mine, and you taught me to no longer
be afraid. I'll never be afraid.
HART CRANE
Tonight.
Stay in the house, close all the windows, now your searching for
fire. Some will say, as others are
listening, now it's gone too far. Pale
face in white surrounds you, you can never forget, her body fell into the
sunlight, your broken hands missed.
Tomorrow I will bring you down.
Fall through heart, you hands were always so small, it's the things
about this place, tonight we escape.
Tonight.
OUTRO IN NO MINOR
Far away from our homes the heat will flash. Behind the dash, it gathers. Such winds blow cold -- the fiction of you
life's love so deep in the blood. And
I'm taking pictures of all of this.
I'll write down the history in the case that we are missed. Throw out the medicine -- our lives will
enhance. Search out complacency and
we'll never miss the dance, never the dance.
The end of this night we'll remember -- it redesigns our lives.