(The Winnebago. Lee is driving. Ivy, Carmen, and Zack are directly behind
him.)

Lee: We're gonna get so busted!
Carmen: Lee, if you dare try to rat on Ivy, I'm going to cut you off- and I
don't mean midsentence!
Zack: Anyone for apple pie?
Lee: How can you think of eating at a time like this?
Carmen:(to Ivy) Now, if any chance a border guard asks you a question, can
you say anything without sounding too nervous or suspicious?
Ivy:(calmly) Sure.
Carmen: What?
Ivy:(nervously) You just heard it. 'Sure' is all I can say. I think I'll take
that apple pie.
Lee:(screeches) Apple pie?! Why don't you just wave Old Glory in the air and
sing "The Star Spangled Banner"?
Zack: Don't you snap at her, Lee.
Carmen: What's our progress, Jordan?
Lee: We're right at the border.
Carmen: Everyone, just keep your answers short.

(The Guard enters)

Guard: Hello. Did you enjoy Mexico? (to Carmen) Miss, what was the purpose of
your trip to Mexico?
Carmen: Fun.
Guard:(to Lee) And you, sir. Where you born?
Lee: San Francisco, California. Oh, you want to know what country. The United
States of America.
Guard: That's OK. I don't need more detail.(to Ivy) Miss, did you enjoy
Mexico?
Ivy:(calmly) Sure.
Guard: The weather?
Ivy:(calmly) Sure, sure. Sure.
Guard: Wait here.

(The Guard exits)

Carmen: I'm not sure we're going to be able to pull this off.
Zack: Here he comes now!

(The Guard re-enters)

Guard:(to Ivy) Miss, you've been very quiet. Is there something I should know?
(Ivy shakes her head)
Guard: You seem awfully nervous.Can I have your name, please?
Zack: Oh, jeez. Guess we should have known better than to try this.
Ivy: Zack, no!
Carmen: It was just a mistake-
Guard: You may want to back off. What do you want to say?
Zack:We were trying to put one over on you. Lee?
(He grabs Lee's arm and rolls back the sleeve, revealing the tracking device.)
Zack: We don't have a probation certificate for the convict.
Guard: I knew there was something going on here.
Zack: We weren't planning to come, but-
Ivy: But ignorance of the law is no defense, so take the little jailbird away
and we'll be off!
Guard: No, that won't be necessary. Have a safe trip home.(to Carmen) And by
the way, you look like Carmen Sandiego.

(He exits. The travelers give a victory cry.)

Carmen: (to Lee) Drive!

(The trip is nearly over. Carmen, Ivy, Lee, and Zack are seated in a pizza
restaurant, finishing their meal.)
Carmen: Lee, I'd stomp on your foot under the table, but I'm too afraid of
destroying my dignity.
Lee: Carmen, you're talking about dignity, and you're eating with your
fingers.
Ivy: Pipe down, Lee.
Zack: Look who just came in! It's a bunch of border guards.
(They look up to see the Guard talking to his fellow guards.)
Guard: I met the most motley crew today. A party of four. One was a woman
about thirty. She looked so much like that thief, Carmen Sandiego. They could
have been twins! The other woman was only about eighteen. She didn't speak
much. I thought maybe she didn't speak English. But later she said, 'take the
jailbird away and we'll be off.' That doesn't sound like a beginning sentence.
Zack: He's talking about us.
Guard: The driver was a convict. And the other member was only a young
teenager. It was so weird!

(The four travelers run out the door.)

(Back in the Winnebago.Lee is driving again.)
(Ivy burst out laughing.)
Ivy: (gasping) 'By the way, you look like Carmen Sandiego!'
Carmen: I know. I was so nervous that you'd get caught, I forgot that I'd be
recognized. Zack, that story about the certificate was so funny.
Zack: At least the guard bought it.
Lee: We didn't have such a bad time, did we?

(The set of Vacation)
Mona: How the trip?
Carmen:Wacky. that's all I can describe it.

THE END