Red Hot Romance
T: IT'S BAD ENOUGH FOR SOME TO BOSS
THE REST OF US WHILE THEY ARE
ALIVE, BUT THE LIMIT IS REACHED
WHEN THEY WANT TO KEEP RIGHT ON
AFTER THEY HAVE CASHED IN.
T: FOR INSTANCE, THERE WAS OLD HARDER
N. STONE, THE VICE-PRESIDENT OF
THE BRITISH-AMERICAN INSURANCE CO.
1. LIBRARY, STONE HOME IN WASHINGTON.
(Fade in.) Harder N. Stone, an old skinflint,
is seated at his desk writing.
INSERT--Stone's hand writing the following:
"I, Harder N. Stone, of Washington, D. C.,
hereby direct that, should I die before my son,
Roland Stone, he is to receive from my estate
the sum of $50.00 per week and the use of my
residence in Washington, D. C., until his twenty-
Stone sits back and regards what he has been
writing, smiles smugly, and then continues writing.
INSERT--Stone's hand writing the following:
"On his twenty-fifth birthday, provided he
has lived according to instructions herein set
down, my son, Roland Stone, is to receive his
inheritance at the hands of my chosen executor,
Lord Howe-Greene, of London, President of the
British-American Insurance Co."
Stone sits back and reads over what he has
written and is highly pleased. He then rings for
a servant and presently Briggs enters. He is a
little English butler, who has been in the family
for years. Stone turns to him and tells him that
he has just been making out his will. Briggs is
properly impressed and Stone says to him:
SP: "BRIGGS, I HAVE PROVIDED IN MY WILL
THAT IF I DIE BEFORE MY SON YOU ARE
TO STAY ON WITH HIM AS LONG AS YOU
Briggs is highly pleased, thanks him, Stone
dismisses him, goes on writing. (Fade out.)
T: THE OLD BOY DID DIE, AS HE DE-
SERVED TO, AND LEFT HIS SON AND
HEIR, ROLAND STONE, WITH NOTHING
TO DO BUT LIVE ON $50.00 PER WEEK.
2. ROLAND'S BEDROOM. (Fade in.) He is
lolling in bed in pajamas and dressing gown,
smoking a cigarette and opening a stack of bills
and reading them.
INSERT--top bill--tailor's bill with a balance from the
month before and about $275.00 for this month
with a note in heavy letters "PLEASE REMIT."
This one is turned over, and the second one is
from a club with a statement "You have this day
been posted for $179.00 and your credit is hereby
suspended until same is paid." This bill is turned
over and the third bill is from a florist's for $950.00
worth of flowers sent to Miss Rosalie Bird and
has a note reading: "Impossible for us to fill
any more orders until these bills are paid."
Roland puts down the bills in disgust, not
looking further, as he knows they're all alike.
Briggs, the butler, now enters and takes up
the breakfast tray which is lying on the bed
opposite beside Roland. Roland looks up to him,
then looks at the bills, and says:
SP: "HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO PAY
THESE BILLS ON $50.00 A WEEK?"
Briggs shrugs his shoulders as though he
had nothing to do with it, and suggests that
Roland's bills are too big. He then leaves.
Roland looks after him, disgusted, runs through a
few more bills, throws them on the floor and at
this juncture, Tom, Roland's valet, a big husky
negro with a child-like, innocent smile, enters the
room with letters, goes to Roland and hands him
the letters. Roland looks at them and sees they
are more bills, puts them down. Tom picks up
others from floor and gives them to Roland, much
to his disgust. He looks up to Tom and says:
SP: "YOU'RE A FINE 'SECRETARY'! WHAT
DO I PAY YOU FOR?"
Tom looks up at him, round-eyed and smiles
SP: "YOU DON'T."
This is a poser for Roland for a moment, he
finally regains his composure and says:
SP: "WELL, I AM GOING TO WHEN I GET MY
INHERITANCE NEXT APRIL."
Tom nods his head quizzically as he has heard
this many times before. Roland then picks up the
bills, runs through them again and says:
SP: "THE QUESTION NOW IS - HOW ARE WE
GOING TO LIVE UNTIL APRIL?"
He sighs, reaches over to a table which has a
little calendar on it, picks up the calendar, sees
that it is the 13th of January, and runs through
the pages very dubiously. He finally looks up
at Tom, shows him how many days they have to
live through on the calendar, and says:
SP: "I HAVEN'T A NICKEL AND I CAN'T
BORROW ANYTHING NOW. HOW ARE
WE GOING TO LIVE UNTIL APRIL?"
Tom looks about very dubiously. Finally he
gets an idea, he looks from one object of furniture
to another, and his idea grows until he is
fairly beaming and he says:
SP: "THEY'S A MIGHTY LOT OF HOCKABLE
STUFF AROUND HEAH, BOSS!"
He indicates the things around the room, and
Roland is delighted with the idea. He picks up
the bunch of bills, looks at the top one.
Roland then looks around for something to pay
that with and his eye falls upon an antique vase.
He jumps out of bed, takes the vase and hands
it to Tom together with the tailor's bill, saying
that that will pay for that. Roland looks at the
INSERT--BILL FROM CLUB.
Roland then takes a couple of ornaments from
the mantel, gives them to Tom together with the
club bill saying that they will pay for that.
Roland then looks at the next bill.
Roland then takes a picture from the wall, leaving
a discolored place behind it, saying that will
pay for that. He then thinks a moment and picks
up a little antique clock and hands it to Tom,
SP: "AND BUY HER SOME ORCHIDS WITH THIS."
Tom grins, goes out loaded down with all the
junk. Roland looks after him, very pleased with
himself, and, probably thinking of his girl and
the orchids, smiles, and fade out.
T: INDICATING THAT IT'S TEA TIME.
3. EXTERIOR COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE. (Fade in.)
Roland comes down the street with a bunch
of orchids in his hand and goes up and rings
T: COLONEL BIRD, OF VIRGINIA, WHO HAS
BEEN HANGING AROUND WASHINGTON
FOR THIRTY-FIVE YEARS, WAITING FOR
A JOB WHICH WAS FIRST PROMISED
HIM BY PRESIDENT CLEVELAND.
4. PARLOR, COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE. Colonel
Bird, seated at a desk, very busily reading
several large law books and making notes, trying
to "kid" himself into believing that he is busy.
A colored mammy presently shows in Roland,
who greets the Colonel very effusively. The
Colonel asks Roland to sit down, which he does.
The servant exits. The Colonel, not being very
greatly impressed with Roland, excuses himself
and goes on with his work, explaining that he
has some very important matters on hand.
Roland looks at him, smiles to himself, then looks
out expectantly toward the hall.
T: THE COLONEL'S DAUGHTER, ROSALIE,
THE LADY OF THE ORCHIDS.
5. HALLWAY, COLONEL'S HOUSE. Rosalie
comes down the stairs and enters the parlor.
6. PARLOR, COLONEL'S HOUSE. Rosalie
rushes over, greets Roland. The Colonel
rises until Roland and the girl are seated on a
sofa, when he sits and goes on with his
work. Roland gives Rosalie the orchids. Rosalie
thanks him, but says:
SP: "ROLAND, YOU SHOULDN'T BUY ORCHIDS
She then points around to different vases in the
room, all of which are full of orchids. She holds
on to the orchids and gives Roland a little lecture
on economy, telling him he has no business to
spend his money so foolishly. And Roland says
he thought she liked orchids. She says she does
and he's a dear sweet boy to bring them, but he
sees she is not pleased and is correspondingly
7. EXTERIOR COLONEL'S BIRD'S HOUSE.
A low rakish roadster drives up and out of it
gets Jim Conwell. He has a small sized package
in his hand.
CLOSE UP--And he runs up and rings the bell.
T: JIM CONWELL IS ONE OF THAT BROTHERHOOD
OF DIPLOMATIC HANGERS-ON
WHO MAKE A SHADY LIVELIHOOD BY
DOING THE DIRTY WORK OF THE VARIOUS
8. EXT. COLONEL BIRD'S PORCH. The colored
mammy opens the door, lets in Conwell,
takes his hat and coat and shows him into the
9. PARLOR COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE. The
colored mammy shows Conwell in, the old
Colonel jumps up from his desk, and greets him
very enthusiastically. His manner toward Conwell
is very different from his manner toward
Roland. Rosalie then greets Conwell very
sweetly but with reserve and Roland, giving him
a dirty look, greets him as coldly as possible.
The old Colonel now gives up his work to join
the group. Conwell holds out his little package
toward Rosalie and says:
SP: "HERE'S A LITTLE THING I PICKED UP
IN AN ANTIQUE SHOP. I THOUGHT
YOU'D LIKE IT."
Rosalie puts down her orchids in Roland's
chair. She then takes the package, opens it up
and takes out Roland's clock. She lets out a
cry of surprise and delight, then turns to Conwell
SP: "IT'S LOVELY! I'VE ALWAYS WANTED
A CLOCK LIKE THAT."
Roland looks at this, open-mouthed and in
absolute astonishment, sits down in his chair,
smashing the orchids. Rosalie then shows the
clock to the old Colonel and the two of them
rave over it, forgetting the existence of Roland,
who finally comes to sufficiently to see that he's
sitting on something, gets up and picks up the
mashed orchids, looks at them disgustedly. The
clock is finally put in place on the mantel and
Rosalie comes back and joins Roland, who stands
looking ruefully at the flowers in his hand. He
dolefully shows them to her, and she, seeing he
is hurt, comforts him, telling him he's a dear
boy and she loves the orchids. She takes them
from him and tenderly straightens them out,
but Roland is still in the dumps. Conwell is
now throwing a lot of "bull" at the old Colonel,
SP: "I JUST SAID TO THE SECRETARY OF
STATE: 'YOU'RE NOT LOOKING VERY
WELL, ELIHU, I WISH YOU'D LET MY
OLD FRIEND, COLONEL BIRD, TAKE
SOME OF THE WORK OFF YOUR HANDS.'"
He goes on spouting and the old Colonel fairly
eats it up. Finally, Roland, unhappy and jealous
and disgusted at Conwell, gets up and tells Rosalie
he has to go. Rosalie begs him to stay in
her sweetest manner but Roland takes another
look at Conwell, says no, he's got to go, says
good-by to Rosalie and says good-by to the
Colonel and Conwell, and leaves.
STREET EXT. COL. BIRD'S HOUSE. -- Roland
comes out and goes dolefully down the street.
HALLWAY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland
enters, disheartened. Hangs up hat and coat
and stick and goes slowly into library.
10. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. (Fade in.)
Tom is fussing about the room. Roland enters
the room, terribly depressed and upset and starts
to tell Tom about the scene that just took
place. He goes on talking about Conwell and
SP: "THE OLD MAN STANDS FOR ALL OF
CONWELL'S BUNK AND THINKS HE'S
Tom is very sympathetic and tells Roland he
ought to settle the matter. Roland agrees with
him, pounds on the table, and says:
SP: "I THINK THE TIME HAS COME WHEN
I OUGHT TO TELL ROSALIE I LOVE
Tom agrees with him, says that's absolutely
right. Roland says he knows it's right--the only
thing to do is to come to an understanding right
away. He then goes over to the telephone and
calls a number, and while he is waiting for the
number, he goes on talking to Tom, telling him
just how he is going to settle things and Tom
11. HALLWAY COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Rosalie comes down the hall to the telephone
and answers it.
12. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland is
still talking to Tom, telling him how he's going
to lay down the law when he suddenly hears
Rosalie's voice over the 'phone. All his belligerency
oozes out. He smiles and stammers foolishly
and gulps and tries to get his courage up
as if he were going to lay matters right before
her and finally weakens and comes out with
SP: "HOW ARE YOU?"
13. HALLWAY COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Rosalie, wondering what the devil he's asking
her that for when he just left her, frowns quizzically
and says that she's feeling all right.
14. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland goes
on talking through the phone in a stammering
embarrassed sort of way and Tom keeps telling
him to go on and tell her what he was going
to. Roland tries to motion to Tom and
he goes on stammering and stuttering.
15. HALLWAY COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Rosalie still very quizzically listening to Roland.
She finally asks him what is the matter with him.
16. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland stammering
into the 'phone. Finally Tom utterly
disgusted, comes over to the 'phone and yells in
SP: "HE'S TRYING TO ASK YOU TO MARRY
HIM, MISS ROSALIE! WILL YOU?"
Roland turns angrily to Tom, still holding the
receiver to his ear, and starts to berate Tom
soundly, when he suddenly hears something in
the telephone which stops him. He listens, overcome
with wonderment and finally says:
SP: "SAY THAT AGAIN!"
17. HALLWAY. COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Rosalie at the 'phone, laughing, says:
SP: "YES. OF COURSE I WILL!"
18. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland can
hardly believe his ears, makes her reiterate it,
then turns to Tom in great glee and says:
SP: "IT'S ALL RIGHT. SHE SAYS YES."
He then turns back to the 'phone and asks
Rosalie if she really means it. While he is talking
to Rosalie, Tom goes over to a heavy couch,
pulls it out toward the hall. Roland still at the
'phone talking, turns and asks Tom what he is
doing. Tom still pulling the couch says:
SP: "AH'M GOING TO BUY YOU A ENGAGEMENT RING."
Roland smiles and nods, and suddenly thinks of
the clock episode, stops Tom, tells him to wait
a minute, then turns toward the telephone and
SP: "WHAT WOULD YOU RATHER HAVE - A
RING OR A SOFA?"
19. HALLWAY. COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Rosalie listening at the 'phone is utterly dumbfounded
at this odd request, she asks him to
repeat it, then finally still puzzled, says:
SP: "WHY, A RING OF COURSE! YOU SILLY BOY!"
20. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland listening
at the 'phone, hears Rosalie wants the ring,
turns to Tom and tells him to go on and hock
the sofa. He then turns to Rosalie, starts in to
talk to her ecstatically over the 'phone, smiling,
as we fade out.
T: THAT NIGHT AT THE HANGOUT OF THE
FRINGE OF THE DIPLOMATIC SET.
21. A WOP RESTAURANT. (Fade in.) This is
a typical $1.35 Table d'Hote joint. Seated at
the various tables are many diplomatic hangers-
on, all of them crooked and all looking out for
the main chance. Among them is a Mexican, a
Frenchman, an Englishman, a German, a Russian,
an Italian, a Chinaman, a Jap, a Bulgarian, a
Hindoo and their women -- perhaps three or four
Americans, but the atmosphere is generally foreign,
the waiters being Wops.
Seated at one table is Conwell alone. He is
eating spaghetti and looking very sourly about.
T: ENRICO DE CASTANET OF BUNKONIA.
Enrico is seated at a table talking to a very
attractive vamp type of a woman.
T: HIS LADY FRIEND (THE INTERNATIONAL
VAMP AND SPY), COUNTESS
PULLOFF DE PLOTZ.
The Countess is listening very intently to
Enrico. Enrico goes on talking very earnestly,
and finally says:
SP: "YOU SEE, WE MUST HAVE A MAN WHO
CAN BE BOUGHT BODY AND SOUL."
The Countess agrees with him, and perhaps
suggests somebody, whom Enrico says would
never do. The Countess starts thinking again,
and, as she does, her eyes wander over the room
and she sees Conwell, who has just gotten up,
paid his bill and given the waiter a very small
tip, at which the waiter shows his disgust. Conwell
then turns to leave the restaurant, starts
down toward Enrico and the Countess. The
Countess sees him, has a sudden idea that he
would be fine for the job and points him out to
Enrico. At this moment, Conwell has stopped
to talk to someone at one of the tables, Enrico
looks him over from head to foot, asks the Countess
if she is sure he can be handled; she assures
him he can.
SP: "HE WORKED FOR THE SHIPPING BOARD."
Enrico agrees that he looks like a good bet,
and just at this moment Conwell comes past the
table, sees the Countess motion to him. He comes
over to the table, Enrico rises and the Countess
introduces him saying:
SP: "SENOR DE CASTANET IS MINISTER OF
WAR OF BUNKONIA."
Conwell is mildly interested in this fact. Enrico
then asks Conwell to sit down, so he takes a seat,
and the Countess then begins to get very confidential.
She looks around to see that no one is looking,
then getting their three heads together,
she says in whispered tones:
SP: "WE ARE ENGINEERING A LITTLE
REVOLUTION DOWN IN BUNKONIA."
Conwell is a little more interested now. He
pricks up his ears a bit and casually glances
around to make sure no one is overhearing, then
looks to De Castanet for some information, and
De Castanet, with a quick glance around says
SP: "THE AMERICAN CONSUL HAS RESIGNED
AND A NEW ONE IS TO BE APPOINTED
Conwell is still more interested, asks Enrico
where do I come in? Enrico says, indicating
SP: "I AM HERE TO SEE THAT THE 'RIGHT'
MAN IS APPOINTED."
Conwell says "Oh ho," he sees and looks at
the Countess, who nods her approval. He then
asks her where he comes in. With more mysterious
looks, they get their heads very closely
together, and the Countess says:
SP: "WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU FOR
CONSUL? THE PICKINGS ARE GOING TO
BE FINE FOR THE 'RIGHT MAN.'"
Conwell considers a moment, smiles quizzically
and shakes his head and says:
SP: "NO, I'M IN WRONG - THE SENATE
WOULDN'T CONFIRM ME."
The Countess tries to argue with him but he
is obdurate and says there's no chance for him,
but as they are talking he is suddenly struck
with a brilliant idea. He says, "Wait a minute."
They all wait and finally he speaks and says:
SP: "I'VE GOT JUST THE MAN FOR YOU!"
They are all attention and eager to know who
it is. He indicates that this must be very much
on the quiet and then says:
SP: "OLD COLONEL BIRD -- FINE RECORD -
EASY TO HANDLE -- BEEN WAITING
THIRTY-FIVE YEARS FOR A JOB."
The Countess indicates that she knows old
Bird and tells Enrico that he is ideal, that they
couldn't do better. Enrico asks if he can be
handled when the time comes. Conwell swells
up and tells him to leave that to him. It's
the easiest thing in the world. Enrico turns to
Madame, who backs up Conwell and Enrico is then
satisfied. Conwell then speaks up and
SP: "I'LL GO ALONG AS SECRETARY AND
KEEP MY EYE ON THE OLD BOY."
They both express their approval of that,
and indicate that he will get part of the swag. The
Countess leans over and says rather tauntingly:
SP: "I SUPPOSE THE OLD BOY'S DAUGHTER
WILL GO ALONG, TOO!"
Conwell says he bets she will and winks the
other eye. The Countess laughs and Enrico
smiles, interested at the idea of a romance. He
and the Countess exchange glances. Conwell
SP: "REMEMBER -- MUM'S THE WORD UNTIL
AFTER THE APPOINTMENT IS MADE."
They all agree to that and put their heads
together and go on with their scheming. (Fade
T: AND SO IT CAME TO PASS--
22. PARLOR COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE. (Fade
in.) An old trunk in the middle of the floor
and the Colonel and mammy are packing in his
books, papers, etc. The Colonel all full of business
and very busy. Rosalie is helping, but is
very sad over the matter.
23. EXTERIOR COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Roland rushes down the street with a newspaper
in his hand, runs up the steps and rings the
24. PARLOR COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE. Rosalie
looks up quickly, thinking that this must be
Roland. Mammy starts for the door but Rosalie
tells her she will answer the bell, and she runs
out into hall.
25. HALLWAY COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Rosalie runs to the door and opens it.
26. EXTERIOR COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Rosalie opens the door, and Roland rushes in.
27. HALLWAY COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Roland, full of excitement, grabs Rosalie, shows
her the article in the newspaper.
INSERT--Article in newspaper stating that Colonel Bird
has been appointed Consul of Bunkonia and that
he is to leave for there immediately with his
daughter and his Secretary, James Conwell.
Roland asks Rosalie if this is true. Rosalie
nods her head sadly, says that it is and
SP: "I DIDN'T KNOW A THING ABOUT IT
MYSELF UNTIL THIS MORNING."
Roland protests that she can't go away and
leave him, and Rosalie asks what she can do
and says that her father has waited for this all
his life and insists on taking her along. Roland
asks where her father is, she points into parlor,
and Roland tells her that he will see about
whether she will be taken away or not and
full of worry, rushes into the parlor followed
28. PARLOR COLONEL BIRD'S HOUSE.
Colonel Bird is helping mammy pack and Roland
rushes in followed by Rosalie. He goes to the
Colonel and protests against taking his fiancée
away from him. He puts his arm around Rosalie
and says that he wants to marry her now and
keep her. The Colonel can't see this at all, and
SP: "IF YOU MARRY NOW, HOW ARE YOU
GOING TO SUPPORT HER?"
Rosalie turns to Roland and says that is the
trouble -- that her father won't let her stay there
and marry him because he can't support her.
Roland then turns to the Colonel and says:
SP: "BUT, COLONEL, IN ANOTHER MONTH
EVERYTHING WILL BE ALL RIGHT!"
Rosalie seconds the motion and tries to persuade
her father that everything will be all right,
but her father shakes his head, looks grimly at
Roland and says:
SP: "THAT'S WHAT CLEVELAND SAID TO ME
Roland looks discouraged and realizes that he
is up against a hard proposition in the old
Colonel, but tries to explain that if they can just
struggle along for a month he will have millions,
but the Colonel says:
SP: "WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR INHERITANCE
RIGHT IN YOUR HAND, COME DOWN TO
BUNKONIA AND GET HER."
Roland, much discouraged, still tries to argue
with the old boy, but he cuts him off and goes
on about his work. Roland then turns to Rosalie,
who by this time is in tears. At the sight of
Rosalie's tears, Roland forgets his own disappointment,
and putting his arm around her, leads
her off to a secluded corner out of sight of the
old Colonel, seats her and tries to comfort her,
putting his arm around her and saying:
SP: "THE FIRST OF APRIL IS MY BIRTHDAY.
I GET MY INHERITANCE THAT DAY AND
I'LL START AT ONCE FOR BUNKONIA."
At once Rosalie looks up at him with her eyes
full of tears and smiles wanly. Roland takes
her hand, wipes away her tears, kisses her and
SP: "I'LL SEND YOU A CABLE EVERY DAY!"
At this Rosalie is greatly cheered up, she looks
and says: "Will you, dear?" and he assures her
that he will and again kisses her. (Fade out.)
T: THE AMERICAN CABLE COMPANY DID
WELL THAT MONTH BUT LOOK WHAT
HAPPENED TO ROLAND'S HOUSE.
29. HALLWAY ROLAND'S HOUSE. (Fade in.)
View of hall without a piece of furniture, bric-a-
brac or pictures. (Dissolve out.)
30. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. (Dissolve in.)
View of Library absolutely bare. (Dissolve out.)
31. ROLAND'S BEDROOM. (Dissolve in.) Bedroom
has nothing in it but one couch, one chair
and a soap box on which are Roland's mirror
and toilet articles.
Roland is asleep on the couch. Presently
Briggs enters, looks about at the devastated
room, then shaking his head over the laziness
of his master, goes wakes Roland up and
SP: "I WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SIR."
Roland wakes up, looks at him, rubs his eyes,
realizes that his probation is over. Tom enters
smiling with a telegram in his hand which he
gives to Roland who opens it and reads:
New York, March 31, 1920. "Arrive Washington
four-forty to-morrow, April first, to deliver
Roland jumps out of bed, goes over and claps
Briggs on the back and shakes hands with him -
then shakes hands with Tom. Then makes Briggs
and Tom shake hands. Tells them both he's
going to have loads of money and they will be
paid. Roland then goes over to his soap box
on which is a calendar. He looks at page marked
"March 31." Tears it off and looks at page
marked "April 1."
He tears off the page with a flourish which
reads March 31st, turns it over and, sitting on
the floor, writes on the back of it. Tom in the
meantime sends Briggs for his breakfast and
gets out Roland's clothes, brushing them with
great gusto. Roland finishes writing and reads
what he has written.
INSERT--WHAT ROLAND IS WRITING.
"Miss Rosalie Bird, Santo Grafto, Bunkonia. At
last the great day is here. Lord Howe-Greene
arrives to-day with my inheritance. Leave for
Bunkonia to-morrow to claim you as my bride.
He reads it and tells Tom to send it. Tom takes
the message, scratches his head and looks
around the room for something to hock. Roland
wants to know why he's hesitating, and he tells
him. Roland then says:
SP: "TAKE THE COUCH!"
Tom looks at the couch dubiously, then looks
at Roland and says: "Where are you going to
sleep to-night?" Roland, in an extravagant
manner and with a grand flourish, tells him to
take it away.
SP: "I WON'T BE ABLE TO SLEEP TO-NIGHT
Tom goes over, picks up the couch and starts
out of the room with it. At the door, Roland
stops him, picks up the one remaining chair,
hands it over to him and says:
SP: "CABLE HER SOME ROSES WITH THIS!"
Tom takes the chair, starts for the door when
he suddenly thinks of the fact that Lord Howe-
Greene is due that morning, so he stops, turns to
Roland and says:
SP: "WHAT DAT LORD HOWE-GREENE TO
SIT ON WHEN HE COMES?"
Roland says that's right, so he leaves the chair
and starts out with the couch. Briggs in the
meantime has entered with Roland's breakfast.
Puts breakfast on soap box. Roland tells him
to put the chair down in the hall. Briggs doleful.
Roland slaps him on the back -- tells him to cheer
up. Briggs goes out shaking his head and Roland
sits on chair and starts his breakfast all
smiles. (Fade out.)
T: THE NEW MILLIONAIRE.
32. FRONT OF ROLAND'S HOUSE. (Fade in.)
Roland's taxi drives up and stops, followed by
Tom's. Roland and Lord Howe-Greene with
portfolio get out. Tom also gets out with bags.
Howe-Greene starts up walk. Tom stops Roland
and shows him three cents -- all he has and whispers
to him, saying:
SP: "HOW DO I PAY THE TAXI?"
Roland signifying that he can't be annoyed with
such little things, says grandiloquently:
SP: "TELL THEM TO WAIT!"
He follows Lord Howe-Greene up the walk
while Tom goes to the taxis and tells them to wait.
Then he follows with bags.
33. RECEPTION HALL ROLAND'S HOUSE.
It is perfectly bare. Briggs is just coming down
the stairs carrying the one chair that is left, he
puts it down, looks around at the bare hall,
shakes his head sadly, dusts off the one chair,
then looks up quickly at hearing bell ringing, goes
over to the door.
34. FRONT OF ROLAND'S HOUSE. Briggs
opens the door and lets Roland and Lord Howe-
Greene in followed by Tom with bags.
35. HALLWAY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland and
Lord Howe-Greene enter, followed by Tom and
Briggs. Briggs is delighted to see the old Englishman
but is terribly chagrined at the condition
of the house. He takes Lord Howe-Greene's
coat and hat, and Roland engages Lord Howe-
Greene in talking, then motions to Tom to get
the chair into the library. Tom sneaks the
chair around behind Lord Howe-Greene and into
36. LIBRARY. Tom sneaks the chair in, puts it
down near the fireplace.
37. HALLWAY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland
noticing that Tom has the chair placed, escorts
Lord Howe-Greene into the library with a grand
38. LIBRARY. Tom is standing behind the chair.
Lord Howe-Greene and Roland enter. Tom seats
Lord Howe-Greene very ceremoniously in the
chair. Lord Howe-Greene looks around the
empty room and is astounded. He turns to
Roland and says: "I say, old fellow, the place looks
rather beastly bare. Where's the furniture?"
Roland thinks for a moment, looks at Tom; Tom
does some quick heavy thinking and finally says,
SP: "WE SENT THE FURNITURE OUT TO BE
CLEANED IN HONOR OF YOUR COMING."
Roland smiles in relief and in approval of Tom,
and then says:
SP: "THE CLEANERS ARE ON STRIKE SO
THEY DIDN'T GET IT DONE IN TIME."
Lord Howe-Greene blandly accepts the explanation
and thanks him for his thoughtfulness.
Roland, who has been fondling the portfolio, can
hardly wait for it to be opened, and he gives it to
Lord Howe-Greene and then goes and stands by
the mantel with Tom. Lord Howe-Greene fishes
out the papers, finally comes to the will and
starts to read the glad news. He reads for a
moment and then
INSERT--"That providing said Roland Stone has carried
out previous instructions of the will, his
father provides as follows:"
Roland, overcome with impatience, begins to
get even more interested. Lord Howe-Greene
clears his throat and goes on reading:
INSERT--"I bequeath to my son, Roland Stone, one
unencumbered position in the Anglo-American
Insurance Co. as soliciting agent with a guarantee
of $25.00 per week."
Roland looks in astonishment at Lord Howe-
Greene as does also Tom. Lord Howe-Greene
clears his throat again and goes on reading:
INSERT--"If at the end of one year, the business said
Roland Stone procures for the company has
proven profitable, the same will be a proof of
his good business judgment, and he is then to
come into possession of my entire fortune."
Roland stares simply open-mouthed in astonishment
and disappointment, while Tom can
hardly believe his ears.
INSERT--"If on the other hand, the company at the
end of one year has suffered a loss through the
agency of said Roland Stone, my entire fortune
shall be given to the support of the Washington
Home for Incurables."
Roland, absolutely dumbfounded by the news,
stares at Lord Howe-Greene, then looks around
at Tom. Tom looks at Roland accusingly.
Roland then turns in discouragement and asks
Lord Howe-Greene if there's any more. Lord
Howe-Greene goes on reading:
INSERT--"It is further provided that conditions under
which said Roland Stone is to work, shall be
subject to the approval of Lord Howe-Greene."
Roland is utterly unable to take all of this in,
and he insists on reading it himself. Lord Howe-
Greene hands it to him, and Roland starts in to
read it as though he could hardly believe his
eyes. Tom looks over his shoulder, and, finally
disgusted with the whole proceeding, he goes
over toward the window, stands there dejectedly
and looks out.
39. STREET IN FRONT OF ROLAND'S HOUSE.
Flash of the two taxis waiting, taken from an
angle of the house.
40. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. Tom receives
a terrible shock on seeing the taxis and realizing
that they can't pay them. He then goes over
to Roland, and tells him that the two taxis are
out there, eating their heads off. Roland looks
out toward the window, thinks about the taxis,
then looks over to Lord Howe-Greene, who is
sitting comfortably in the last chair, thinks a
moment, then goes over to Lord Howe-Greene,
excuses himself, takes the chair from under the
utterly flabbergasted Lord Howe-Greene, gives
it to Tom and tells him to take it out to pay the
taxis. Tom takes the chair and goes out, Lord Howe-
Greene looking after him in wide-eyed
astonishment. Roland then turns to Lord Howe-
Greene and starts in to protest about the conditions
of the will, but Lord Howe-Greene tells
him that there is nothing that he can do. He
takes the papers from Roland. Sits on window
sill (especially built) and starts in to read the
long document to Roland. Roland trying to
follow Howe-Greene gets disgusted, leans against
wall and at length slips to floor and sits there
disconsolate, thinking of his rotten luck and of
the girl away off with his rival. (Dissolve out.)
41. STUDIO GARDEN IN BUNKONIA. (Dissolve
in.) Rosalie sitting in a hammock with
Conwell standing near her, natives playing
ukuleles, fanning them and giving them ice drinks,
and Conwell whispering sweet nothings in Rosalie's
42. LIBRARY ROLAND'S HOUSE. (Dissolve in.)
Roland, sitting in the corner, very much distressed
by the vision he has just seen.
Lord Howe-Greene is still sitting on window
sill reading document. Roland gives him a dirty
look, puts his hands on his ears and at length
jumps up and stalks out into the hall, leaving
Howe-Greene still reading.
43. HALLWAY--ROLAND'S HOUSE. Roland
rushes in from library, looks back disgusted at
Howe-Greene, who is still reading. At this moment
Tom enters from street, goes to Roland,
looks at him despondently, and says: "What are
we going to do now?" Roland puts his hand on
Tom's shoulder, and says with great emphasis:
SP: "LOOK HERE, TOM, YOU'VE GOT TO
THINK OF SOME WAY TO GET ME TO
Tom thinks a moment, finally his face brightens
and he says:
SP: "IF YOU'VE GOT TO SELL INSURANCE,
WHY NOT SELL IT IN BUNKONIA?"
Roland is delighted at this, and tells Tom he
knew he'd think up a way out -- that they can
start for Bunkonia to-morrow just as they had
planned. Tom says of course they can. Roland
says they will put it up to Lord Howe-Greene at
once and they go into the library.
44. LIBRARY, ROLAND'S HOUSE.
Lord Howe-Greene still sitting reading. Roland
and Tom enter, see him, and stop, both
disgusted. Howe-Greene finishes his reading.
Gets up and goes to them -- gives Roland the
document, tells him it is very important for him
to keep it safe. Roland puts it in his pocket
then turns to Howe-Greene and says:
SP: "I'VE BEEN THINKING THINGS OVER,
AND I'VE DECIDED THAT IF I HAVE TO
SELL INSURANCE, I WOULD LIKE VERY
MUCH TO GET AWAY FROM WASHINGTON."
Lord Howe-Greene indicates that he understands
his feelings in the matter, thinks a moment
SP: "I HAVE IT! YOU SHALL TRY NEW YORK."
Roland looks at him in utter astonishment and
says he is surprised that Lord Howe-Greene
would suggest such a terrible place to sell insurance.
He then turns to Tom and Tom agrees
with him. Roland then says to Lord Howe-
SP: "NEW YORK WOULD NEVER DO! IT'S A
TERRIBLE PLACE FOR INSURANCE!"
Lord Howe-Greene is interested, and wants to
know why, and Roland goes on saying:
SP: "WHY THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ARE
KILLED THERE DAILY!"
Lord Howe-Greene is tremendously interested
and surprised and wants to know how. Roland
goes on to describe the terrible life that
New Yorkers lead and we fade out.
INSERT--Animated Cartoon of subway entrance -- people
pushing their way madly into the subway.
Interior of subway car. Animated Cartoon.
Conductor is packing people in, smashing them in
so they can hardly breathe and mashing them
against the wall so that they collapse. He
hammers others on the head with mallets to get them
to move back. Everybody about him is mashed
flat but still he pushes more in. (Fade out.)
Roland concludes his story about the terrible
life in New York and Lord Howe-Greene greatly
surprised at this says:
SP: "MY WORD!"
Roland appeals to Tom for confirmation and
Tom nods his head and says that he hasn't heard
the half of it. Lord Howe-Greene shakes his
head, thinks a moment and says:
SP: "THEN YOU SHALL TRY CHICAGO!"
Roland is surprised at his suggesting Chicago,
shakes his head, and says:
SP: "CHICAGO IS WORSE. PEOPLE ARE
BLOWN TO DEATH IN CHICAGO BY
He turns to Tom and Tom confirms this and
Lord Howe-Greene, extremely puzzled and surprised,
wants to know how. Roland then goes
on to describe a scene of how people are blown to
death in Chicago, along Michigan Avenue. (Fade
INSERT--Animated Cartoon. (Fade in.) Michigan
Avenue. People are being blown down the Avenue
and slammed up against walls where they
mash out flat. Some of them are blown over and
over and some of them are rolling like barrels.
Roland finishes his tale about Chicago, and Tom
agrees with him, shaking his head and saying:
"It is indeed a terrible sight to see this thing
that Roland just described!" Lord Howe-Greene
shows great distress, and shakes his head again
SP: "MY WORD!"
Roland looks over at Tom and gives him a
wink. Tom gives Roland the high sign and the
two of them feel that things are going fine when
suddenly Lord Howe-Greene scratches his head
and gets a brilliant idea. He then tells Roland
that he has just the place for him and says:
SP: "I HAVE A COUSIN--A REAL ESTATE
AGENT IN LOS ANGELES--WHO WRITES
ME THAT THE CLIMATE IS SO SALUBRIOUS
THAT EVERY ONE LIVES TO A RIPE
Roland looks at Lord Howe-Greene in astonishment,
feeling that he has been stuck at last.
Lord Howe-Greene then pats him on the shoulder
SP: "THAT'S THE PLACE FOR YOU, MY BOY!"
Roland looks genuinely alarmed and turns to
Tom for aid, but Tom himself is pretty much
stumped at this. Lord Howe-Greene feeling
that their problem has been settled, says that
that's exactly the place and everything will be
fine. Roland stalls, does some quick, heavy thinking,
finally gets an idea, and says: "Lord Howe-Greene,
that's exactly where you're wrong."
SP: "THE TROUBLE OUT THERE IS THAT
PEOPLE NEVER DIE. THEY WON'T BUY
Roland is rather pleased with himself for
thinking up this and Tom congratulates him on
it, smiling his approbation. Lord Howe-Greene
can hardly believe this angle of the situation,
says he doesn't think that's possible. Roland,
realizing that he has got to spike this says:
SP: "WHY I TRIED TO SELL INSURANCE
OUT THERE ONCE AND WHAT DO YOU
Lord Howe-Greene is interested and wants to
know what did happen to him. Tom looks rather
quizzically at Roland, feeling that he is getting
out beyond his depth. Roland clears his throat
and starts in to describe what happened. (Fade
45. FRONT OF BUNGALOW IN LOS ANGELES.
Three men with white whiskers to their waist
are playing leap-frog on the lawn. Roland comes
down the street, approaches one with an insurance
circular in his hand and asks if he could
interest him in some insurance. The old fellow
SP: "NO, I DON'T WANT ANY INSURANCE
BUT YOU MIGHT SEE PA."
Roland is surprised that a man of his age
should have a father and asks where he is. The
old fellow points to the front door of the bungalow
SP: "HE'S HELPING GRANDPA CARRY THE
PIANO UP IN GRANDMA'S ROOM."
Roland can hardly believe his ears at this and
says "What?" The old man nods and says:
SP: "YES, GRANDMA IS GOING TO TAKE
Roland looks aghast at the old man who goes
back to his leap-frog, and finally coming to,
goes up to the house and rings the bell while the
three old boys continue their leap-frog. Presently
a youthful looking Jap with long, white
whiskers opens the door. Roland asks for the
father and is shown in.
46. HALLWAY LOS ANGELES BUNGALOW.
Roland enters with the Jap servant. Pa and
Grandpa--one with whiskers to the knees and
one with whiskers to the ankles--are lifting a
piano up the stairs. Roland approaches pa and
asks him if he could interest him in insurance.
Pa holds the piano with one hand, with the other
takes the young man's circular and looks at it.
He then shakes his head no, turns to grandpa
and says: "Father, do you want any insurance?"
Grandpa asks to see the circular and Pa hands it
up to him. Grandpa looks at it a minute, then
looks at Roland, shakes his head and says:
SP: "I THINK NOT, SON. I CAN LOOK AFTER
MY FAMILY FOR A FEW YEARS YET,
AND BY THAT TIME THEY'LL BE ABLE
TO TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES."
He hands the circular back to Roland and he
and Pa pick up the piano and go on upstairs,
Roland looking after them in absolute amazement.
47. LIBRARY, ROLAND'S HOUSE. (Fade in.)
Roland finishes his story about Los Angeles.
Turns to Tom who confirms everything he has
said. Lord Howe-Greene, shaking his head in
amazement over these extraordinary conditions
in America, says very weakly--
SP: "MY WORD" (in very small type).
And Lord Howe-Greene is very much distressed.
He feels that this case is baffling him. He finally
looks up hopelessly and asks Roland what they're
going to do. Roland, puzzled, turns to Tom
and asks him what he thinks of the situation.
Tom thinks a moment, finally gets an idea, turns
to Lord Howe-Greene and says:
SP: "IF YOU COULD ONLY GET HIM TO GO
DOWN TO BUNKONIA."
Roland pooh-poohs this idea and says no, he
never would, he couldn't go there because it is
too far away. But Tom goes on into raptures
about Bunkonia, telling him what a marvelous
place it is for business of all kinds, and Lord
Howe-Greene, glad of some solution to his problem,
finally jumps at the idea -- turns to Roland
SP: "THAT'S AN IDEA! NEW COUNTRY -
VIRGIN FIELD - IT'S JUST THE PLACE
Roland thinks a minute as though he had to
be convinced, but Lord Howe-Greene keeps on
begging him to take a chance. Tom joins Lord
Howe-Greene in urging him, and finally Roland
allows himself to be persuaded, decides that he
will go, Lord Howe-Greene shakes him warmly
by the hand and - (fade out).
T: SANTO GRAFTO, CAPITOL OF BUNKONIA,
THE BEAUTIFUL LAND OF SUNSHINE
AND FLOWERS, MUSIC AND
LAUGHTER, TAMALES, TYPHOID AND
48. EXTERIOR VIEW OF TOWN OF SANTO
GRAFTO. (Fade in.) Showing natives, equipages,
a few soldiers, etc. (Dissolve out.)
49. PARK (dissolve in) SINGERS, DANCERS,
MUSICIANS, FLOWER SELLERS, CHILDREN,
ETC. (Dissolve out.)
T: KING CARAMBA AND HIS COUNCIL ENGAGED
IN THEIR FAVORITE INDOOR
SPORT OF RAISING TAXES AND DOWNING
50. THE KING'S COUNCIL CHAMBER. Caramba
sitting at the head of the table with three councilors
on his right and three on his left -- among
them being Enrico. Some servants in livery are
standing about. One of the councilors has just
finished reading the text of a bill to raise the
taxes. King Caramba is sound asleep with a
bottle in his hand. Enrico, the only sober one
in the lot, is looking in a sinister, calculating way
around the table. The councilor who is reading
the bill sways as he reads and the paper jiggles
in his hand.
51. INSERT PAPER RAISING TAXES. The
councilor finishes reading, puts paper in front of
King and guides his hand while he signs it.
INSERT--King's hand is signing the paper, it wanders
all over the paper so that most of the name is
written on the table with a grand flourish at the
After signing the paper, the king takes another
drink. The man takes the paper and blows on it.
Enrico, with a sinister smile, gets up and starts to
go. The Councilor takes the paper, waves it
aloft to the other councilors who cheer in a
drunken manner. They all pour out another
bumper. Enrico stands by the doorway in a
calculating manner, then smiling a satisfied
smile, he turns on his heel and leaves. (Fade
T: THE REVOLUTIONISTS AWAIT THEIR
LEADER AT THEIR RENDEZVOUS IN
THE RUE DE STILETTO.
52. REVOLUTIONISTS' RENDEZVOUS. (Fade
in.) A number of revolutionary leaders are there,
including the Countess, Conwell, the General and
two men in citizen's clothes. They are discussing
matters more or less violently and waiting for
53. RENDEZVOUS AT GATE. Enrico enters,
looks about stealthily, sees that no one is watching
and then raps three times on the gate. The
gate is opened by a villainous servant and Enrico
54. REVOLUTIONISTS' RENDEZVOUS. The
revolutionists are still talking together and they
see Enrico entering. They gather about him to
get the news and Enrico says:
SP: "THEY WERE ALL DRUNK TO-NIGHT. IT
WILL SOON BE TIME TO STRIKE."
They all rejoice at this. Enrico asks the General
about the army and he replies:
SP: "TWO HUNDRED OF THE ARMY ARE
WITH US NOW. IT WILL TAKE A HUNDRED
PESETAS TO WIN OVER THE
Enrico is very angry at this, and asks him what
he means by a hundred pesetas, and is very sore
at the tremendous cost at buying these men.
The Countess stops his raving, putting her finger
over his lips, goes into her stocking, takes out
the money and gives the General two bills, which
amount to more than he has asked for. He then
turns to Conwell and starts in to talk. The
General puts the money in his pocket but Enrico
notices him and says:
SP: "HERE! HERE! GIVE US THE CHANGE!"
Reluctantly the General digs it up, starts to
pass it over to the Countess but Enrico stops
him before the Countess notices, grabs the money
and puts it in his own pocket. Enrico then
crosses over to Conwell and says:
SP: "ARE YOU SURE WE CAN HANDLE OLD
BIRD WHEN WE'RE READY?"
Conwell tells him it's the easiest thing in the
world, that the old man has got to do just what
he says and winds up with:
SP: "DIDN'T I GET HIM THIS JOB?"
They all seem satisfied with this and go on
plotting. (Fade out.)
T: ON THE EDGE OF THIS POLITICAL VOLCANO
SITS OUR OLD FRIEND, COLONEL
BIRD, AT PEACE WITH ALL THE WORLD
IN THE FULLNESS OF HIS IGNORANCE.
55. COLONEL BIRD'S ROOM IN THE CONSULATE.
(Dissolve in.) Colonel Bird is sitting
at his desk reading a political book. Mammy is
straightening room and dusting. Rosalie enters
dressed for the street. She goes to the Colonel,
looks over his shoulder, tells him that he works
too hard, makes him promise he will get some
rest and kisses him good-by and goes out.
56. CONWELL'S ROOM IN THE CONSULATE.
Conwell is sitting at his desk very busily but
rather slyly making out a report. Rosalie comes
from her father's room, says good morning to
Conwell and starts to pass through. Conwell
immediately jumps to his feet, comes to her, and
stops her, admiring her dress, etc. Rosalie shows
by her attitude that she has begun to fear this
man. She starts to pass him but he takes her by
the hand, restrains her and says:
SP: "HOW MUCH LONGER ARE YOU GOING
TO KEEP ME WAITING?"
Rosalie is embarrassed and doesn't know what
to say. She tells him that she doesn't care about
him in that way and he finally says:
SP: "DON'T YOU THINK YOU OWE ME SOMETHING
AFTER ALL I'VE DONE FOR
She expresses her gratitude for the help he has
been to her father but doesn't quite see why
she should marry him for that reason. Conwell
is getting impatient and finally says:
SP: "YOUR FATHER AS GOOD AS PROMISED
THAT YOU'D MARRY ME."
Rosalie is surprised and incredulous, says she
doesn't believe it and turns and goes to the door.
Conwell tries to restrain her but doesn't succeed.
Rosalie calls in to her father and asks if he will
57. COLONEL BIRD'S ROOM AT CONSULATE.
Colonel Bird puts down his book and goes in to
58. CONWELL'S ROOM AT CONSULATE. Rosalie
looks up at her father almost in tears and
asks if he promised that she marry Conwell.
Colonel Bird berates Conwell for suggesting such
a thing, tells her she shall marry the man of
her choice. Conwell protests that Bird is indebted
to him for his job, Colonel Bird straightens
himself up with great dignity and says:
SP: "WELL, SIR, DIDN'T I MAKE YOU MY
Conwell looks at him as much as to say -
"You poor old simp - just wait." Colonel Bird
takes Rosalie to the door, kisses her good-by and
she goes out. He then turns to Conwell and
tells him to stop annoying his daughter.
59. EXTERIOR CONSULATE. Rosalie comes out
and goes down the street toward the station.
60. CONWELL'S ROOM AT CONSULATE. Colonel
Bird is still laying down the law to Conwell
who nods his head, and Colonel Bird goes back
to his own room. Conwell looks after him in
a menacing way, then shakes his fist after him
and suggesting that he will get even with him
yet. He then gets his hat and goes out. (Fade
61. RAILWAY STATION AT SANTO GRAFTO.
Station master is there, baggage man, three or
four natives, some kids and several pretty native
girls. Rosalie also is waiting. The train comes
in, a couple of soldiers get off and greet the girls.
Two natives get off and then Tom and Roland
get off. Rosalie rushes to them. Roland kisses
her, she greets Tom and leads them off.
62. BACK OF SANTO GRAFTO STATION.
Carriage waiting with native driver. Rosalie
enters with Roland and Tom, they get into the
carriage and drive off. (Fade out.)
T: THE HOTEL DEL MOSQUITO.
63. FRONT OF HOTEL. (Fade in.) There are
several tables in front of the hotel and also
several booths and a sign over the entrance.
Several people are sitting at the tables drinking.
At one table sits the Countess and Enrico. Conwell
enters and joins them, rather sore over his
rebuff by Rosalie. They ask him why so grouchy
and he tells them. They give him the laugh but
Enrico slaps him on the back and tells him she
will come around all right. Waiters are going
in and out. A pretty girl is selling flowers, a
couple of musicians are playing guitars. Carriage
drives up with Rosalie, Roland and Tom. Tom
and Roland get out, a native porter comes from
the hotel and takes their bags into the hotel
followed by Tom, while Roland stops to speak to
Rosalie. Conwell looks up, sees Roland and is
very much disturbed. He calls the attention of his
two friends to Roland and tells them who he is
and they all look searchingly at him. Roland says
a very affectionate good-by to Rosalie and says:
SP: "MAY I COME TO SEE YOU THIS
Rosalie tells him that he may, bids him good-by
and he watches her drive away, sighs and turns
and goes into hotel. Conwell half hides so that
Roland won't see him. After he is well out of
sight Conwell starts to grumble at his ill luck at
having this fellow come down here. Enrico pats
him on the back, whispers in his ear and says:
SP: "WE CAN PUT HIM OUT OF THE WAY
DURING THE REVOLUTION."
The Countess nods that this will be easy but
Conwell looks doubtful, shakes his head and says:
SP: "NO, IT WOULD BE DANGEROUS FOR
US -- HE'S TOO WELL KNOWN IN
Conwell shows his anger and chagrin at the
turn of affairs. Enrico shrugs his shoulders but
the Countess starts in to think of some way out.
64. HALLWAY OUTSIDE ROLAND'S APARTMENT.
Porter enters with Roland and Tom,
opens door and they enter Roland's room.
65. ROLAND'S APARTMENT IN THE HOTEL.
The porter shows Tom and Roland in. Roland
is quite pleased with the place, tips the porter
generously; the porter leaves, followed by Tom and
66. FRONT OF HOTEL. Conwell is still cursing
his luck. Enrico is sympathetic but helpless. The
Countess is thinking heavily and finally gets an
idea. She leans over, pats Conwell on the hand
SP: "THERE'S SOMETHING ON EVERY MAN
IF YOU CAN ONLY FIND IT. LEAVE IT
TO ME. I'LL FIND SOMETHING TO HANG
Enrico approves of this, Conwell is slightly
interested and the Countess goes on explaining
that she has tackled many a difficult proposition
and won out. Just to leave it to her. (Fade out.)
67. BEAUTIFUL COURTYARD OR GARDEN
AT THE CONSULATE.
Roland, dinner coat, and Rosalie, evening dress,
and the Colonel are there. Roland has just
finished telling the story of his dad's directions
regarding his fortune and he finishes up by saying
SP: "SO WE'VE GOT TO WAIT ANOTHER
She takes his hand and says she doesn't mind
at all, she knows he'll be a great success. The
old Colonel comes to him, takes him by the
hand and says:
SP: "I'M GLAD SOMETHING HAS SET YOU TO
WORK, BUT YOU'VE GOT TO WIN TO
Roland thanks the Colonel, tells him he knows
it and that he's going to make good. The Colonel
rather brusquely tells him he hopes he does and
then leaves. Rosalie runs to Roland, tells him
she knows he's going to make good.
68. HALLWAY OUTSIDE ROLAND'S APARTMENT.
The Countess enters, looks around
stealthily, goes to the door, tries it, finds it
locked, takes a hairpin from her hair, unlocks
the door with it, looks around and enters.
69. ROLAND'S ROOM IN HOTEL. The Countess
in dark evening dress enters and closes the door.
Begins to rummage around among Roland's
things in his wardrobe trunk She finally uncovers
lot of blank insurance policies. She
shows great interest in the discovery of the
papers, as papers are one of her main stock in
trade. She starts feverishly to examine them.
INSERT--HANDFUL OF INSURANCE BLANKS.
The Countess looks at them in disgust, puts
them back where she found them and goes on
70. GARDEN OF CONSULATE. Another very
beautiful shot with Rosalie and Roland standing
or sitting on a bench planning their future.
71. ROLAND'S BEDROOM IN HOTEL. The
Countess still rummaging around. Down in the
bottom drawer of the trunk, she discovers a copy
of Roland's father's instructions which have been
given him by Lord Howe-Greene. She pounces on
this and reads it.
INSERT--If at the end of one year the business said
Roland Stone procures for the company has
proven profitable, the same will be proof of his
good business judgment and he is then to come
into possession of my entire fortune.
Countess ponders over this a moment, then
reads next paragraph:
INSERT--Part of statement as follows:
"If, on the other hand, the company at the
end of one year has suffered a loss through
agency of said Roland Stone, my entire fortune
shall be given to the support of the Washington
Home for Incurables."
The Countess gloats over this discovery, carefully
replaces everything just as she found it,
conceals the paper in her dress and stealthily
leaves the room.
72. EXTERIOR OF CONSULATE. Roland is just
bidding Rosalie good-night. She is expressing
her good wishes for his success. Roland looks
out toward the view of Bunkonia, then turns to
Rosalie and says:
SP: "WHY, IN A VIRGIN FIELD LIKE THIS, I
CAN'T HELP BUT MAKE THE COMPANY
Rosalie is just as certain as he is about it.
He then goes on telling her that in just one
little year he will be claiming her. Rosalie is
delighted. Roland timidly kisses her, says good-
night and leaves. Rosalie looks after him and
73. CAFE OF THE HOTEL. Enrico and Conwell
sitting at a table smoking and drinking. Conwell
is quite nervous and irritable. Enrico is trying
to jolly him up. The Countess enters in a very
mysterious way, sits beside them and tells them
with much glee but in great secretiveness that
she has great news. She stealthily draws the
paper from her dress and shows it to them.
INSERT--SAME CLAUSE AS BEFORE WITH THE
COUNTESS' FINGER POINTING TO IT.
Conwell and Enrico are puzzled over this, and
Conwell asks the Countess how it concerns him.
The Countess looks furtively about and says:
SP: "DON'T YOU SEE--IF HE LOSES MONEY
FOR THE COMPANY, HE LOSES THE
FORTUNE AND THE GIRL!"
Enrico and Conwell consider this for a moment,
and finally realize the truth of it but ask the
Countess what she has in her bean. The Countess
looks furtively about and says:
SP: "WE'LL HAVE HIM INSURE THE LIVES
OF THE KING AND COUNCIL."
Enrico and Conwell look at her, then at each
other and ask what good that will do. The
Countess looks at them in a surprised way and
SP: "AREN'T THEY ALL TO BE KILLED IN
Slowly the force of this breaks over the minds
of Enrico and Conwell, their faces become
wreathed in smiles, at length both laugh boisterously.
Conwell takes the paper and looks at it
again, then rises, takes his glass, holds it out
toward the Countess and says:
SP: "TO THE WOMEN--BLESS THEM. WHAT
WOULD WE DO WITHOUT THEM?"
He and Enrico raise their glasses and drink
to the Countess who smiles and blushes. (Fade
T: THE NEXT MORNING--THE PLANT.
74. FRONT OF THE HOTEL. (Fade in.) Roland
is sitting at a table in the f.g. having his
breakfast. Conwell and Enrico come to the hotel
doorway and look out. They finally spot Roland.
Conwell then gives instructions to Enrico as to
what to do. He then goes out toward Roland
while Enrico backs into the hotel doorway and
waits. Conwell goes over to Roland, slaps him
on the back, greets him heartily. Roland rises,
rather embarrassed, Conwell shakes his hand
cordially and sits beside him. Enrico in the
doorway watches with a sinister smile. Conwell
asks Roland what he is doing down in Bunkonia.
SP: "I'VE COME DOWN TO SELL INSURANCE."
Conwell is interested in this and Roland tells
him in a few words what he wants to do. Conwell
is quite interested and says:
SP: "PERHAPS I CAN GIVE YOU A BOOST. I
KNOW ALL THE BIG GUNS DOWN HERE."
Roland is mildly interested but not overly
enthusiastic as he knows something of Conwell's
boasting proclivities. However he thanks him.
Conwell offers Roland a cigarette and while Roland
is taking it, Conwell quickly signals to
Enrico. Enrico sees the signal and walks down
to the front of the hotel. Conwell looks up
sharply, pretending he has just seen Enrico,
points him out to Roland, who looks also, and
Conwell then speaks, saying:
SP: "THAT'S ENRICO DE CASTANET,
SECRETARY OF WAR, AND A GREAT PAL OF
Roland is quite impressed. Conwell says he
will bring him over and gets up and goes over
toward Enrico. Enrico turns, sees him, greets
him very enthusiastically, saying, "Ah, my
friend," shakes his hand and raises his hat at
the same time Conwell is doing it. Conwell
then asks him if he won't come over and meet
his friend, at the same time giving Enrico the
wink. Enrico says he will be pleased and they
both go over to Roland's table. Conwell
introduces Enrico to Roland. Enrico again
raises his hat. They all sit, Roland orders
drinks and Conwell briefly tells Enrico about
Roland's business. Enrico says he is interested
in any friend of Conwell's and after a
few words of explanation from Roland, Enrico
says to Conwell:
SP: "THERE'S A MEETING OF THE COUNCIL
TO-NIGHT. WHY NOT BRING YOUR
FRIEND? I'LL HAVE HIM MEET THE
Roland is quite overcome by all this kindness,
and Conwell says: "That is exactly the thing to
do." Conwell takes his drink, holds it up and
SP: "HERE'S HOPING YOU INSURE THE
LIVES OF THE KING AND ALL HIS
They all drink to Roland's success. Roland is
overcome by their kindness. (Fade out.)
T: AT THE COUNCIL MEETING.
75. KING CARAMBA'S COUNCIL ROOM. (Fade
in.) King Caramba and his councilors are there,
boozing as usual. Conwell is standing making a
speech to them which they are not listening to
very intently. Conwell is telling them what a
great thing insurance is, and says:
SP: "RIGHT AT YOUR VERY DOOR, GENTLEMEN,
IS A YOUNG YANKEE WHO IS
ABLE TO SELL YOU THIS WONDERFUL
The councilors listen in a drunken way, all
except old Señor Frijole, who is very sore and
grouchy and signifies that he wants nothing to
do with this Yankee and his business. Enrico
rises to speak, telling them what a wonderful
thing insurance is, and then he says:
SP: "WHY, DO YOU REALIZE, GENTLEMEN,
THAT WE GET THOUSANDS OF PESETAS
FOR A MERE FEW HUNDRED?"
He turns to Conwell and asks him if he is right.
Conwell assures him he is right, and then continues
his speech. At this the Councilors begin
to take very much more interest. They signify
that this must be very good after all, all except
old Señor Frijole, who is sitting next to Enrico.
He pulls Enrico's sleeve and says:
SP: "BUT YOU HAVE TO DIE TO GET IT--
Enrico gives him a quick, dirty look, tells him
to shut up, which squelches him somewhat, but
he goes on mumbling to himself. Conwell goes
on talking, saying that this opportunity should
not be overlooked. He sits down. Enrico says
he thinks it is a fine idea and says:
SP: "I'LL TAKE 10,000 PESETAS MYSELF."
At this the councilors are more interested
than ever as they know Enrico is not the type
to be done. Old Frijole goes on grumbling into
his glass of liquor saying he will have nothing
to do with it. Conwell goes over to the door,
opens it and goes out.
76. HALLWAY IN PALACE. Roland sitting on a
settee. Conwell comes from Council Room.
Roland with application in his hand jumps up
nervously and meets him. Conwell tells him it
is all right and they go into Council Room.
77. COUNCIL ROOM. Conwell brings Roland in
and introduces him to the councilors who greet
him with drunken enthusiasm, while Conwell
stands in the background with a menacing leer.
Roland is very much pleased, but bashful, overcome
by his luck. Enrico, with a grand flourish,
asks Roland for an application which Roland
gives him, and he signs his own application with
a grand flourish and hands it over to Roland
as if to say--"There, what more assurance do
you want that this is a good thing?" At this
the other councilors all reach out drunkenly and
grab applications, Roland writing in the amounts,
and all of them signing the duplications drunkenly.
Enrico and Conwell exchange triumphant
looks, but old Señor Frijole shows his disgust
for the entire affair. He finally goes up and
tries to keep the King from signing his application,
but the King gives him a push, he staggers
back into his chair, mumbling and grumbling
and warning them against Yankee tricks. By this
time, Roland has most of the applications signed,
Conwell comes up, pats him on the back and
congratulates him. (Fade out.)
T: ABOUT A WEEK LATER. (Fade in.)
78. COLONEL BIRD'S ROOM IN CONSULATE.
Rosalie in simple evening dress is standing by
the window. Roland, in a blue coat and flannel
trousers, rushes in and Rosalie runs to him. He
tells her he has a surprise for her. She is very
much interested and wants to know what it is.
SP: "I'VE INSURED KING CARAMBA AND HIS
COUNCILORS FOR NEARLY A HUNDRED
Rosalie is amazed and delighted at this good
news. Roland says:
SP: "I JUST DELIVERED THE POLICIES AND
COLLECTED THE PREMIUMS."
Rosalie is in ecstasies and throws her arm
around him and kisses him, much to his
embarrassment, although he is also greatly pleased.
SP: "I WANT YOU TO COME OUT TO HELP
CELEBRATE MY GOOD FORTUNE."
She is delighted, picks up a tulle scarf and
goes out with Roland.
79. CONWELL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. Conwell
is standing at desk as Roland and Rosalie
enter. Conwell turns to them smiling. Roland
stops and tells Rosalie Conwell's influence got
him his big clients. He goes to Conwell and
thanks him, shaking his hand. Rosalie is
surprised and puzzled that Conwell should help
Roland. Roland gets Rosalie and they go out
bidding Conwell good-night. Conwell looks
after them leering.
80. EXTERIOR CONSULATE. Roland and Rosalie
come out of the Consulate and leave in the
direction of the hotel.
81. REVOLUTIONISTS' RENDEZVOUS. The
Countess, three other Revolutionists and about
thirty soldiers are there. They are all excited
and talking among themselves.
82. GATEWAY OF RENDEZVOUS. General enters
hurriedly and knocks three times--gate opens
and he quickly enters.
83. REVOLUTIONISTS' RENDEZVOUS. Revolutionists
talking and awaiting somebody. The
general enters and joins group. He looks about
SP: "ENRICO HAS JUST LEFT THE COUNCIL
MEETING. AS SOON AS HE COMES WE
He then leaves and goes to soldiers--the others
discuss this news excitedly.
84. GATEWAY OF RENDEZVOUS. A group of
six or eight soldiers, led by a sergeant, approach
skulkingly--the sergeant knocks at the gate
which opens and the soldiers all sneak in.
85. EXTERIOR CONSULATE. Colonel enters
from opposite direction taken by Roland and
Rosalie and enters consulate. Four guards look
out from hiding places.
86. CAFE IN FRONT OF THE HOTEL (NIGHT).
Several people at tables. Roland
and Rosalie enter and go into one of the little
booths and sit down--waiter comes and takes
their order--they are very happy.
87. EXTERIOR CONSULATE. Enrico enters,
whistles softly, and four guards sneak out of
hiding places and come to him. He asks if Colonel
Bird is home. They tell him he has just
gone in. He tells them to wait in the shadow
and they go into the shadow and Enrico, looking
about cautiously, goes to the porch and knocks
88. CONWELL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. Conwell
at desk hears knock, glances toward the
colonel's room and goes to the door, opens it.
Enrico quickly enters. Conwell closes the door.
Enrico asks him if the Colonel is in. He smiles
and says yes. Enrico tells him he has come to fix
old Bird. Conwell says: "Easy--he'll do anything
you say," and tells him to wait a moment
and goes into the Colonel's room.
89. COLONEL'S ROOM. Colonel at his desk.
Conwell enters, tells him that Enrico de Castanet
wishes to see him. Colonel somewhat surprised
and a little bit flattered, swells up a bit, tells
Conwell to show Señor de Castanet in. Conwell opens
the door and de Castanet enters. The Colonel
greets him and they sit down and Conwell goes out
and they begin to talk, Enrico telling him that
they are going to pull a revolution that night
and put King Caramba and his council out of
90. CAFE IN FRONT OF HOTEL. Roland and
Rosalie still dining, having a grand time. A couple
of revolutionists enter and sit in the booth next
91. COLONEL'S ROOM. Enrico is talking very
earnestly to the Colonel. At length he says:
SP: "NOW IF YOU WILL ADVISE THE AMERICAN
PRESIDENT TO RECOGNIZE OUR
NEW GOVERNMENT TO-MORROW, IT
WILL MEAN ALMOST ANYTHING YOU
WISH TO ASK."
The old Colonel is puzzled and vaguely alarmed
at this, doesn't quite get it. Asks Enrico:
SP: "ARE YOU OFFERING ME A BRIBE?"
Enrico shrugs his shoulders and says if that
is what he chooses to call it. The old Colonel
becomes very angry, rises at his desk, begins to
lay down the law to Enrico and says:
SP: "YOU WOULD HAVE ME BARTER THE
HONOR OF MY COUNTRY? ARE YOU
AWARE, SIR, THAT YOU ARE DEALING
WITH A LOYAL AMERICAN CITIZEN?"
He bangs the table, stretches himself to his
full height. Enrico rises and tries to argue with
him, but the Colonel brushes him away and
grandiloquently points to American flag.
SP: "THAT, SIR, IS THE GREATEST FLAG IN
THE WORLD AND NO ACT OF MINE
SHALL EVER STAIN IT."
At the finish of the speech, the old Colonel,
with a grand flourish, orders Enrico out of the
room. Enrico backs out, protesting all the way.
The old man kicking him out at the finish.
92. CONWELL'S OFFICE. Conwell waiting
expectantly. Enrico lands in the room, to which he
has been catapulted by the old Colonel's foot.
Conwell comes to him, much perturbed.
93. COL. BIRD'S ROOM AT THE CONSULATE.
Old Colonel slams the door and walks up and
down in excitement.
94. CONWELL'S ROOM. Enrico angrily telling
Conwell what happened in the other room. Conwell
very sore and disgusted at the old man,
SP: "HAVE YOUR GUARD KIDNAP HIM AND
LOCK HIM UP AND I'LL TAKE CHARGE
OF THE CONSULATE.
Enrico angrily approves of this and rushes
95. COLONEL'S ROOM AT CONSULATE. Colonel
at his desk, rapidly writing a telegram,
96. CONWELL'S ROOM AT CONSULATE. Conwell,
looking out hears the button, goes into the
97. COLONEL'S ROOM AT CONSULATE. Colonel
finishing telegram, rises. Conwell comes to
him. Colonel indignantly tells him in a very
few words what has happened, points to the flag,
hammers his chest in great indignation, shows
him a telegram which he is sending. Conwell
TO CAPT. HENRY HALYARD, U. S. BATTLESHIP
UTAH, PORTO PUNKO, BUNKONIA.
REVOLUTION THREATENED HERE TO-
NIGHT. SEND MARINES AT ONCE TO
PROTECT AMERICAN INTERESTS.
Conwell smiles at this. The Colonel orders him
to send it at once and Conwell, still smiling,
starts to leave the room, when the door opens
and in bursts Enrico with his four guards. He
tells them to arrest the Colonel, which they do,
but the old boy puts up a fight. They finally
overcome him and hold him prisoner. He appeals
to Conwell, who only laughs at him and
tears up the telegram and throws it in his face,
shakes his finger at the old man and says:
SP: "WE SHALL SEE NOW WHO IS THE BOSS
The old Colonel is annoyed and tries to get
at Conwell but the guards hold him. Conwell
smiles and says:
SP: "WE SHALL SEE NOW WHETHER I GET
YOUR DAUGHTER OR NOT."
He tells the guard to rush the old man out,
which they do, followed by Conwell and Enrico.
98. CONWELL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. The
guards rush the old Colonel through the room
and out, followed by Conwell and Enrico.
99. FRONT OF THE CONSULATE. Guards rush
the old Colonel out followed by Enrico and
Conwell. Enrico tells the guard:
SP: "LOCK HIM UP IN THE DUNGEONS
UNDER THE PALACE."
He scribbles on a card that he gives to one
of the guards. The guards rush the Colonel off
toward the palace and Enrico and Conwell go
in the opposite direction, toward the rendezvous.
100. CAFE IN FRONT OF HOTEL. (Long shot)
showing the two booths, with Roland and Rosalie
in one and the two revolutionists in the other.
CLOSE UP OF TABLE WITH ROLAND AND ROSALIE.
They are talking animatedly. Roland
has a little notebook in his hand, which he shows
to Rosalie and says:
SP: "THINK WHAT THIS MEANS TO US, ROSALIE!
I CAN'T FAIL NOW."
Rosalie is delighted at the wonder of this--
takes his hand and they go on talking of their
CLOSE UP OF THE TABLE WITH THE REVOLUTIONISTS.
A third revolutionist officer comes
in hurriedly, sits down, looks about and says:
SP: "THE HOUR TO STRIKE IS AT HAND."
The other revolutionists listen.
CLOSE UP OF ROLAND AND ROSALIE.
They are pricking up their ears.
CLOSE UP OF REVOLUTIONISTS' TABLE.
One asks the newcomer what is going to happen
and he says:
SP: "THE REVOLUTION STARTS TO-NIGHT."
The other two gloat over this.
CLOSE UP--Roland and Rosalie listen, their alarm
growing, Roland climbs on chair and looks into
OTHER BOOTH--Roland looking over top, frightened.
The revolutionists go on talking, the newcomer
SP: "KING CARAMBA AND HIS COUNCIL
WILL BE KILLED FIRST."
They go on talking together.
CLOSE UP, ROLAND AND ROSALIE--Roland is dismayed
at what he has heard. Rosalie starts to
speak and he tells her to keep quiet and he listens
over the partition.
CLOSE UP, THREE REVOLUTIONISTS--They are
talking, call waiter, pay him and get up and
leave hurriedly. Roland ducks down.
CLOSE UP OF ROLAND--Finally he realizes what is
to happen, and that it means ruin and he turns
to Rosalie and says:
SP: "THEY ARE GOING TO KILL EVERY ONE
They are both terribly alarmed and realize
that this means ruin for their hopes. They don't
know what to do, at length Rosalie says:
SP: "WE MUST HAVE FATHER SEND FOR HELP."
Roland in his terror agrees to this--he throws
a bill on the table, she grabs him by the hand and
they rush out.
101. EXTERIOR REVOLUTIONISTS' RENDEZVOUS--
Enrico and Conwell enter. Enrico
knocks on door three times, the door is opened
and they enter.
102. REVOLUTIONISTS' RENDEZVOUS. Enrico
and Conwell enter and join Countess and General
and tell them the time has come to strike--that
old Bird refused Enrico's request, that they
chucked him in prison and Conwell now is boss
of the Consulate.
103. DUNGEONS UNDER PALACE. Four guards
rush in Colonel Bird and chuck him in one of
the cells, lock the door and rush out.
104. EXTERIOR CONSULATE. Roland and Rosalie
run in and rush into the Consulate.
105. CONWELL'S ROOM AT CONSULATE. Roland
and Rosalie rush through.
106. COL. BIRD'S ROOM AT CONSULATE. Roland
and Rosalie rush in--see the overturned
furniture and realize something has happened.
Mammy enters from back door. Rosalie runs to
her and asks what has happened and she doesn't
know. Rosalie asks Mammy where her father is.
Mammy says she left him here. Rosalie is terrified.
Rosalie and the old servant rush out. Rosalie
upstairs and Mammy to kitchen to look for
the Colonel. Roland picks up the bits of the
telegram from the floor and pieces them together.
Rosalie comes back into the room and the old
servant enters and shakes her head. Rosalie in
SP: "FATHER IS NOT HERE."
Roland thinks a moment, realizes that they have
taken him away, shows his anger at this, calls
Rosalie to him, finishes piecing the telegram
together and then reads it.
INSERT OF TELEGRAM PIECED TOGETHER.
Rosalie having read the telegram shows hope
in her face and says to Roland:
SP: "YOU MUST SEND THAT MESSAGE AT ONCE."
Roland jumps at this and gathers up the pieces
in his hand, starts to go, then thinks of the
girl, stops and asks her what she will do in the
meantime. She says never to mind, but to go on,
old Mammy will stay with her. Roland is reluctant
to go, but Rosalie goes to the drawer of the
desk, takes out her father's old army revolver,
and then goes to Roland and says:
SP: "I AM AN AMERICAN GIRL AND CAN
TAKE CARE OF MYSELF."
She tells him to go and forces him out toward
the door. He takes her in his arms and kisses
her and rushes out. The old mammy comes to
her and puts her arm about her.
107. FRONT OF CONSULATE--Roland rushes out
and down the street toward the station.
108. REVOLUTIONISTS' RENDEZVOUS. The
Countess, the General and a few other officers,
about 100 soldiers and a major are there. Enrico
is giving his instructions to the various people.
Conwell and Enrico enter. Conwell tells Countess,
General and others what has happened and
tells them what to do. Conwell says:
SP: "LOOK HERE, WHAT ABOUT THE GIRL?
I WANT HER ABDUCTED AND KEPT FOR
ME IN THE PALACE."
Enrico says that's all right--tells the general
to put a guard at the disposal of Conwell. Conwell
and the general leave--go to soldiers. Enrico tells
Countess to look after the girl when
she gets to the palace. Countess says she will
and Enrico goes on talking to others.
About 100 soldiers are there. Conwell and
General enter. General selects a guard of about
three men. Tells them to obey Conwell's orders
and Conwell leaves with the three men. The
General then turns to the rest of the soldiers
instructing them as to what they are to do.
109. EXTERIOR R. R. STATION. Roland runs in
and enters station.
110. INTERIOR R. R. STATION AND TELEGRAPH OFFICE.
Roland rushes in and tells
station master he wants to send a message. Starts
to write it. Station master stops him--says he
cannot send message. Roland asks why. Station
master points to telegraph instrument.
CLOSE UP OF TELEGRAPH INSTRUMENT SMASHED.
Roland asks who did that. Station master says:
SP: "THE REVOLUTIONISTS."
Roland is nonplused for the moment--rushes
out of the door, followed by the station master.
111. EXTERIOR R. R. STATION. Roland rushes
out followed by station master. Roland runs in
the direction of the hotel. Station master looks
after him and bites his thumb at him, then goes
back into station.
112. EXTERIOR WINDOW SIDE OF CONSULATE.
Conwell sneaks in with his three soldiers
and peeks in window and sees--
113. COL. BIRD'S ROOM IN CONSULATE--Rosalie
sitting tense holding gun and watching
door. Mammy beside her standing.
114. EXTERIOR WINDOW SIDE OF CONSULATE.
Conwell shows his chagrin at the fact
of Rosalie's having a gun, thinks a moment, then
tells his guard to keep very quiet and follow
him. He sneaks out toward front of house,
followed by guard very quietly.
115. CAFE IN FRONT OF HOTEL. Tom is sitting
in one of the booths shooting craps with a
native civilian. Roland rushes in, tells Tom about
the revolution, says:
SP: "WE'VE GOT TO SAVE ALL THOSE GINKS
He grabs Tom and they rush out of the cafe
toward the palace leaving the native flat.
116. CONWELL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. Conwell,
with his three guards, enter stealthily. He
places the three guards against the wall on each
side of the door leading to the Colonel's room
and he then knocks on the door.
117. COLONEL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. Rosalie,
terrified, says: "Who is it?"
118. CONWELL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. Conwell
says, "It's I -- Jim Conwell."
119. COLONEL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. Rosalie,
greatly relieved, lowers gun and says, "come
in." Conwell enters, leaving the door open. He
smiles ingratiatingly and comes forward. She
asks him if he knows where her father is. He
doesn't know, but pats her reassuringly on the
shoulder and gently takes the revolver from her.
In this position he whistles. The girl looks up
quickly and jumps to her feet in alarm, but before
she can make any move, the three guards rush
in and seize her. Conwell steps to her and says:
SP: "DON'T BE ALARMED, THESE GENTLEMEN
WILL ESCORT YOU TO THE KING'S
PALACE WHERE OUR WEDDING WILL
TAKE PLACE TO-MORROW MORNING."
Rosalie is horrified at this and starts to struggle,
but the men hold her and start to take her out of
the room. The old Mammy grabs a big book
and lambasts Conwell over the head, stunning
him for a moment. She then runs for the guards,
jumping on their backs like a cat. By this time
Conwell has regained his feet, grabs the colored
servant and bangs her on the head with something
heavy, then chucks her over into a corner
and he follows the guards and Rosalie out
through a back door.
120. BACK DOOR OF CONSULATE. Conwell
rushes out followed by the three guards dragging
Rosalie. They start toward palace but Conwell
stops them and says:
SP: "WE'LL KEEP HER IN OUR RENDEZVOUS
UNTIL ENRICO CAPTURES THE PALACE."
They all exit in the opposite direction.
121. REVOLUTIONISTS' RENDEZVOUS. Enrico
is there with the General, Major and Countess.
Enrico is haranguing the soldiers, giving them
final instructions. They all cheer. Enrico calls
Major to him and tells him to look after the
Countess and after they have captured the palace
to bring her there. Major salutes and steps aside
with Countess. Enrico goes on haranguing the
soldiers and at length says:
SP: "AND REMEMBER THERE IS A PRICE
OF THIRTY PESETAS ON THE HEAD OF
They all cheer. Enrico draws his sword and
SP: "ON TO THE PALACE!"
He gives orders to fall in, which they do,
then forward march. They all march out led by
Enrico, the Countess and Major looking after
T: THIRTY PESETAS' WORTH OF ROYALTY.
122. KING'S BEDCHAMBER. Councilors standing
by bed all salute drunkenly. Two lackeys carry
the King (who is dressed in a long white night
gown and night cap and hugging a bottle of
booze to his chest) and chuck him on the bed,
cover him up and stand. The king dozes off
into a drunken stupor. Councilors salute and
stagger out toward Council Room (followed by
123. HALLWAY IN PALACE. Councilors
stagger out of King's bedroom across hall and into
124. COUNCIL ROOM IN PALACE. Councilors
stagger in and sit at table and begin boozing--
SP: "GOOD REST TO HIS MAJESTY."
They all down a drink and sit down.
125. FRONT DOOR OF PALACE. Two royal
guards on duty (uniforms elaborate and different
from those of the army). Roland and Tom rush
up and demand admittance and are refused. Roland
says it is very important to see the king,
but they won't let him in. Tom wants to wallop
them on the nose and go in, but is restrained by
their guns and finally he and Roland leave in
disgust and go down to the edge of the grounds,
then look back and see the guards are not looking
and beat it around to the side of the palace.
126. STREET. Enrico, the General and soldiers
march through toward palace.
127. WALL OF PALACE (outside). Roland and
Tom run in and scale wall.
128. WALL OF PALACE (inside). Roland and Tom
jump down and run toward back of palace.
129. BACK OF PALACE. Roland and Tom run in.
Tom leans down and makes a stepping stone for
Roland, who jumps from his back to window,
pushes it open and crawls in. He then pulls Tom
up after him.
130. HALLWAY OF PALACE. LOOKING TOWARD
THE BACK. Roland and Tom crawl
in the window, quickly look about, rush into the
131. COUNCIL CHAMBER. Councilors all drunk.
Tom and Roland rush in from hall, tell them
there is a revolution on and they've got to beat
it to save their hides as the soldiers and
revolutionists are coming. They all get up in a
drunken, stupid sort of way--don't take it in.
Two lackeys rush out the window at back. Roland
demands of one of the councilors:
SP: "WHERE IS THE KING?"
The councilor, half soused, points across the
hall. Roland and Tom stir up the councilors
and drive them out into the hall. One of them is
too far gone to walk. Roland pitches him over
to Tom who throws him over his shoulder and
carries him out. Little Frijole, the grouch, is the
soberest of the lot and realizes the situation and
tries to follow along, but Roland gives him a
shove and lands him in a chair, saying:
SP: "GET AWAY! YOU'RE NOT INSURED."
They all go out into the hall, Frijole getting up
and following. As he does so, he draws an old
revolver out of his pocket.
132. HALLWAY IN THE PALACE. They all cross
the hallway to the king's bedroom--Tom carrying
his councilor, Frijole following, waving his
133. KING'S BEDROOM. They all rush in Tom
carrying the same councilor and Frijole waving
his revolver. Roland rushes to the king's bed
and wakes him up while the councilors stagger
about stupidly, bumping into each other and not
yet fully realizing what's up. Tom drops his
councilor on a couch or floor. Roland wakes
the king up--pulls him out of bed--tells him
that the revolutionists are coming and he has
got to get out. The King is very stupid from
drink and doesn't take it in. Roland shakes him
and tries to make him understand.
134. STREET CORNER NEARER THE PALACE.
Enrico, the General and army march through.
135. KING'S BEDROOM. Roland, trying to make
old King Caramba understand, says to Tom:
SP: "GET SOME WATER."
Tom leaves. Roland goes on shaking the King.
CLOSE UP OF LITTLE PRIVATE SIDEBOARD OR BAR
in corner of room. Tom rushes in, looks
for water but there is none. He turns and says:
SP: "EVERYTHING HERE BUT WATAH!"
Roland says to bring a bottle of something.
Tom takes a bottle of champagne, knocks neck
off of it and goes toward bed.
CLOSE UP BY BED--Roland still trying to bring King
to. Tom enters with champagne. Roland takes
it and souses it in King's face--King falls back
on bed. Roland and Tom pull him up again to
his feet. King licks champagne from his face
with tongue. They punch, pummel and slap him
and finally bring him to. Roland tells him about
the revolution--that they must get out of the
palace and hide. The King looks around and
sees the various councilors. Finally realizes what
is up -- asks where the Revolutionists are.
136. FRONT OF PALACE. Two royal guards sleeping
on ground. Enrico, General and soldiers
march in. Royal guards are overpowered and
Enrico, General and soldiers begin to bang on
137. KING'S BEDROOM. IN PALACE. Roland
tells him they are rushing on the Palace. The
old King is scared blue--begins to shake and
tremble. Roland asks him if he doesn't know
some way to get out. Finally the old King comes
to his senses enough to remember a trap door
under the flagging of the floor. He takes Roland
over to the place in the floor and points down there.
Roland and Tom look and see nothing but flagging.
The old King keeps pointing and poking
with his toe, says:
SP: "STAIRWAY UNDER THERE."
Finally Roland taps the flagging with his heel.
Then he and Tom get down on their knees and
try to pull up the stone. It won't come. They
look up at the King. He says, yes, that's the
SP: "TUNNEL -- LEADS TO EL JUGGO PRISON."
Tom then gets a big jack-knife from his pocket,
opens it and begins to pry up the flagging. The
old King claps his hands and nods his head.
Roland and Tom continue pulling up the flagging
from the floor.
138. FRONT OF THE PALACE. Enrico, the General
and soldiers banging on the door.
139. THE KING'S BEDROOM. Roland finishes
pulling up the last stone. Tom chucks the stones
under the bed. Roland then raises the trap door,
starts to shove the Councilors down.
140. FRONT OF THE PALACE. Soldiers still
banging on the door trying to break it down.
141. THE KING'S BEDCHAMBER. Roland is
shooing the King and Councilors down the stairway.
Frijole keeps butting in and Roland pushing
CLOSE UP OF THE STAIRWAY. Frijole is trying to
push himself down, but Roland holds him back
SP: "I TOLD YOU TO KEEP OUT OF THIS--
YOU'RE NOT INSURED."
But Frijole insists that he shall go and raises
his revolver at Roland. Roland ducks and knocks
the revolver out of his hand. Tom picks it up.
Roland pushes Frijole over to Tom, who picks
up the little man and drops him out of the
142. FRONT OF PALACE. Soldiers still banging
on the door--door breaks through and they enter.
143. KING'S BEDCHAMBER IN PALACE. Tom
runs to door to hall, opens it a crack and peeks
144. HALLWAY OF PALACE (front end). Soldiers
rush in. Enrico is holding his soldiers at the
door, through which they have broken, telling
them just where to go.
145. KING'S BEDCHAMBER. Tom calls to Roland
to look. Roland comes to the door and looks.
146. HALLWAY IN PALACE. Enrico giving
instructions to his men.
147. KING'S BEDROOM. Tom aims revolver at
Enrico. Roland stops him and says:
SP: "FOR GOD'S SAKE DON'T KILL HIM.
HE'S INSURED FOR TEN THOUSAND
He grabs Tom, closes the door and locks it,
pulls Tom away.
148. HALLWAY. Enrico, with a flourish, leads his
men down the hall toward the King's bedroom.
149. KING'S BEDROOM. Tom picks up his councilor
and starts down through trap with him.
Roland quickly removing traces of the broken
floor, takes a rug and pulls it to the back of the
150. HALLWAY OF PALACE. Enrico and part of
his soldiers are beating down the door of the
King's chamber--the rest going to the council
151. KING'S BEDCHAMBER. He closes the trap
just as the door breaks open and Enrico rushes
in with his soldiers. Enrico rushes to the bed,
sees the King is gone, looks angrily all about
the room, points toward the council chamber
and they all rush out.
152. COUNCIL CHAMBER. Soldiers with General
looking about coming in from door leading to
other rooms where they have found nothing.
Enrico enters, followed by soldiers, discovers
there is nobody there. He meets the General
and they are much puzzled as to who could have
tipped off the King and let him escape. The
General shrugs his shoulders, says if they have
escaped, Enrico can proclaim himself dictator.
Enrico goes to the head of the council table, the
General on his right raising his sword and
SP: "THE KING AND COUNCIL HAVING
FLED, SENOR DE CASTANET PROCLAIMS
HIMSELF DICTATOR OF BUNKONIA!"
Soldiers wave their hats, officers their swords,
and all acclaim him dictator. He starts to make
a speech and says:
SP: "GENERAL, OUR FIRST MOVE MUST BE
TO CAPTURE AND SHOOT OUR RENEGADE
KING AND HIS COUNCIL."
The General approves and calls an officer and
tells him to take a troop and go after the King.
153. HALLWAY OF PALACE. Officer comes in,
gets together his men, and beats it.
154. OLD STONE STAIRWAY WITH HEAVY
WOODEN DOOR AT THE TOP. Roland,
Tom, King and four Councilors stumble up the
155. HALLWAY OF EL JUGGO PRISON WITH
HEAVY WOODEN DOORS AT BACK. Guard
is sitting there half asleep. He arouses a little
156. OLD STONE STAIRWAY WITH HEAVY
WOODEN DOOR (same as 154). Roland still
beating on the door.
157. HALLWAY OF JAIL. The guard, amazed at
hearing the noise outside this door, gets up,
unlocks the big lock and opens the door. Roland
rushes in with the King on his arm, followed
by the four Councilors, Tom carrying one. The
guard is dumbfounded at seeing all these notables
coming through the tunnel and asks what the
trouble is. Roland tells him there is a revolution.
He looks closely at the King, realizes who it is,
drops to his knees and kisses the King's hand.
Roland pulls him up to his feet and says:
SP: "I WANT YOU TO LOCK THIS WHOLE
GANG UP UNTIL I CAN GET HELP!"
The guard looks at Roland then at the King
SP: "LOCK UP MY KING--NEVER!"
He then kneels down and kisses the king's
hand. Roland again pulls him to his feet, takes
him aside and gives him a couple of pesetas.
The guard says, "Sure, that's all right," grabs
the King and hustles him and others down corridor,
Tom carrying his councilor. Roland tells
Tom to stay with them. Tom follows them down
the corridor and Roland beats it out of the front
of the jail.
158. HALLWAY IN PALACE. Countess and Major
enter, followed by Conwell, Rosalie and guards.
They walk down the hall and into the Council
159. COUNCIL CHAMBER. Enrico at the head of
the table, the General on his right (Councilors'
liquor still on table). Several other officers at
the table and a number of soldiers standing
about. Countess enters with Colonel, Conwell,
Rosalie and guards. Countess is escorted by
Colonel to Enrico, who kisses her hand and steps
over to Rosalie, who is with Conwell. She is
terribly frightened but Enrico leers at her and
tells her she has nothing to fear. Then turns to
the party and says:
SP: "LET US DRINK TO OUR LITTLE BRIDE."
They all take glasses. Conwell raises glass to
Rosalie and says:
SP: "TO-MORROW AT TEN."
They all drink to Rosalie, who stands shivering
pitifully. (Quick fade out.)
T: TOO LATE.
160. EXTERIOR CONSULATE. Roland runs in
and rushes in the Consulate.
161. COLONEL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE--Old
mammy lying unconscious where Conwell had
thrown her. Roland rushes in, is alarmed at
seeing the girl gone. He goes to mammy, raises
her up, shakes her, rubs her hands and slaps them,
trying to bring her to.
162. STREET. Tom runs through desperately.
163. COLONEL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. Roland
is giving mammy a drink of water. She
opens her eyes and slowly comes to. He puts
her in a chair and asks her what has happened.
She pulls herself together and says that Conwell
was there with soldiers--says:
SP: "THEY TOOK HER TO THE KING'S PALACE!
THEY ARE GOING TO MAKE HER
MARRY CONWELL IN THE MORNING!"
Roland shows his alarm and anger, is stumped
for a moment. The old mammy begs him to save
her girl. Roland thinks for a minute what is best
164. FRONT OF CONSULATE. Tom runs in and
rushes into the house.
165. COLONEL'S ROOM IN CONSULATE. Roland
is still talking to old mammy, who is describing
what happened. Tom rushes in from Conwell's
room, rushes to Roland and all out of
breath points hand and says:
SP: "THE REVOLUTIONISTS PAID THE JAIL
GUARD TEN PEZITS AND HE TURNED
OVER THE KING AND HIS WHOLE GANG
Roland is in despair at this news. Tom still
SP: "THEY ARE GOING TO SHOOT THEM
ALL IN THE MORNING!"
Roland is utterly flabbergasted at this, looks
bewildered at Tom and the old mammy and
finally says to Tom that they have Rosalie in
the palace and are going to make her marry
Conwell. Tom is open mouthed at this news.
At length Roland says:
SP: "THERE'S ONLY ONE CHANCE -- WE
MUST GO TO PORTO PUNKO AND GET
Tom and the old mammy are very much interested
in this and urge him to try it and Roland
asks mammy if she is all right. She says she
is and tells them to go on. Tom and Roland
beat it out toward the front. She looks after
166. FRONT OF CONSULATE. Roland and Tom
come out and rush down the street toward the
167. DUNGEON UNDER PALACE. Squad of
soldiers bring in the King and four Councilors.
Tom's Councilor is being carried. They chuck
them in the cells and go out. Col. Bird looking
out of adjoining cell and demanding that he be
released. The soldiers spit at him and go out.
168. THE R. R. STATION--Roland and Tom
run in and quickly enter the station.
169. INTERIOR R. R. STATION. Roland and Tom
rush in. Roland asks the station master when
the next train goes to Porto Punko. Station
master laughs sardonically and replies:
SP: "NO TRAINS TO PORTO PUNKO TO-
NIGHT! THE REVOLUTION LEADERS
HAVE GIVEN ORDERS THAT NO ONE
SHALL LEAVE TOWN!"
He laughs again at Tom and Roland. Roland
looks at Tom in alarm then asks the station master
if he is sure. Station master says of course he's
sure. Roland steps out of back door. Tom starts
an altercation with the station master, telling him
he is too fresh, etc.
170. EXTERIOR BACK OF STATION. Roland
comes out and looks around in desperation. Sees
native riding by on an old bony horse, runs to him
and tries to hire horse.
171. INTERIOR R. R. STATION. Tom and station
master's argument is getting warmer. They are
threatening each other violently.
172. EXTERIOR FRONT R. R. STATION. Two
soldiers (officers with revolvers) ride up on hand
car, get off and run into station.
173. INTERIOR R. R. STATION. Tom is pounding
station master's head on counter as two officers
enter. They see him, draw their revolvers and
shout, "Throw up your hands." Tom stops
thumping station master and throws up his hands.
They make him turn toward front door and while
one covers him the other talks excitedly to station
174. EXTERIOR BACK OF R. R. STATION. Roland
trying to bribe native to give him horse, but
native refuses and rides off. Roland turns and
looks toward station and sees--
175. INTERIOR R. R. STATION. One of officers
covering Tom whose hands are up, the other
talking to station master.
176. EXTERIOR BACK OF R. R. STATION. Roland,
alarmed, runs to station.
177. INTERIOR R. R. STATION. Officer finishes
his talk with station master, covers Tom also and
they start to march him toward front door. Roland
rushes in and fairly catapults himself on
the two officers, knocking them down. Then he
and Tom rush out front door jumping over
178. EXTERIOR FRONT OF R. R. STATION.
Tom and Roland rush out of station and start
179. INTERIOR R. R. STATION. Two officers
scramble to their feet and rush out front door,
followed by station master.
180. EXTERIOR FRONT OF R. R. STATION.
Roland and Tom running down road. Two officers
rush out, see them and both fire at them.
Roland falls and Tom stops to help him. The
two officers run up to them followed by station
master. They stick Tom up again and jerk Roland
to his feet. Roland loses his hat and puts
his hand to his head. He has only a scalp wound.
Two common soldiers run in from opposite direction--
attracted by shots. One of the officers says
SP: "TAKE THEM TO THE PALACE DUNGEON
AND LOCK THEM UP."
The two soldiers start off with Roland and
Tom. The officer says, "wait a minute"--they
stop. He speaks to the other officer who nods
his head. The first officer then says to Tom:
SP: "YOU COME WITH US."
He tells the two soldiers to take Roland off,
which they do. The two officers then march Tom
off to the hand car, followed by station master.
Arrived at the hand car one of them says to
SP: "GET ON THERE AND PUMP THAT CAR."
Tom and two officers get on hand car. Officers
cover Tom with their revolvers. The station
SP: "WHERE ARE YOU GOING?"
One of the officers turns to him and says:
SP: "TO PORTO PUNKO."
At this Tom's face lights up and he begins to
pump like mad and the hand car goes down the
track in opposite direction to one of train in
scene. Station master waves his hand to them
and exits to station. (Fade out.)
T: NEXT MORNING.
THE FATAL HOUR APPROACHES.
181. PLAZA--FRONT OF PALACE. Soldiers are
lined up in front of palace. Populace in native
costumes are running about talking excitedly and
reading placards which are posted all about.
INSERT--PLACARD (in fake language).
BINGUS DE SPOLIO KAYITZ! ETC.
DISSOLVE INTO ENGLISH WHICH READS:
EX REX CARAMBA AND HIS COUNCIL
HAVE DESERTED THEIR PEOPLE. ENRICO
DE CASTANET HAS BEEN PROCLAIMED
DICTATOR BY UNANIMOUS
VOTE OF THE ARMY. CARAMBA AND
HIS COUNCIL WILL BE SHOT AT TEN.
ALL TAXES WILL BE RAISED TWENTY
PER CENT AT TEN-THIRTY.
The people are frightened at this and call others
182. COURTYARD BACK OF PALACE. Officer
enters from palace with sixteen soldiers. He
picks out ten for a firing squad. He goes to the
wall and paces off a distance, then lines up his
firing squad. He then takes the other six and
goes back into the palace.
183. COUNCIL ROOM. Enrico enters with Magistrate
carrying a book. Enrico leads him across
the room and says:
SP: "THE WEDDING TAKES PLACE HERE!"
The Magistrate says "all right" and gets
184. DUNGEONS UNDER PALACE. Conwell and
guards with guns enter and open the door of
cell and drag Roland out leaving old Colonel in.
They lock the door. Roland reaches through
the bars and grasps Bird's hand, saying "Good-
bye." They take out Roland, who has a handkerchief
tied around his head. March out. Roland
then straightens up and marches out like a
185. COUNCIL ROOM. Enrico and Magistrate are
waiting (no guns on anybody in this scene).
Countess enters with Rosalie who is terrified and
completely cowed. Enrico goes to her, pinches
her cheek and says:
SP: "WELL, HAVE YOU MADE UP YOUR
MIND TO MARRY CONWELL?"
She weakly shakes her head and says she
doesn't know what to do. Enrico smiles and
SP: "SO YOU'D RATHER SEE YOUR FATHER
KILLED, WOULD YOU?"
She miserably shakes her head and says "No."
Enrico pats her on the shoulder and says:
"That's a sensible little girl."
186. HALL OF PALACE. Roland, with two guards
and Conwell, comes up the stairs and they march
to the door of council room and stop. Conwell
smiles at Roland and says:
SP: "I DID YOU A GOOD TURN, NOW YOU
ARE GOING TO DO ME ONE."
Roland looks at him suspiciously and Conwell
still smiling, says:
SP: "YOU'RE GOING TO BE BEST MAN AT MY
He then throws the door wide open and indicates
the wedding party on the opposite side of
the room, with a flourish. Roland looks in
astounded and horrified.
187. COUNCIL ROOM. Enrico, Magistrate, Countess
and Rosalie standing opposite door. They
all look at doorway and see Conwell and Roland.
Rosalie stands transfixed with her eyes wide
188. HALL IN PALACE. Roland stands transfixed,
looking at Rosalie. Conwell invites him in with
a sinister smile and enters first, followed by Roland,
who is followed by the two guards.
189. COUNCIL ROOM. Conwell enters, followed by
Roland and two guards. Conwell crosses to
Rosalie but Roland stops near door, with guards
back of him almost in doorway. Conwell takes
Rosalie's hand, tells her Roland is to be their
best man and, looking tauntingly at Roland, he
leans over and kisses her. This infuriates Roland
so he cannot contain himself. He suddenly
whirls, pushes the two guards in the face. They
fall through the door out into the hall. Roland
quickly closes the door.
190. HALL IN PALACE. The two guards fall
through the doorway, sprawling on the floor.
191. COUNCIL ROOM. Roland closes the door and
locks it, turns and rushes upon the astonished
Conwell. Then follows a general mixup. Roland
having to fight Conwell, Enrico and possibly
the Magistrate--or the Magistrate might be an
old guy who beats it out the window as soon
as the fight begins. Rosalie tries to help by
picking up a vase or some such object and hitting
Conwell or Enrico, but the Countess stops her
and Rosalie keeps the Countess busy by struggling
with all her might. Conwell must be put
out completely and Roland conquers Enrico and
the Magistrate and would be a complete winner
but for the Countess. While she is struggling
with Rosalie and the fight is going on, the
guards in the hall struggle to their feet and begin
banging on the door. The Countess hears this
and her object is to get the door open. She is
prevented for some time by Rosalie but just as
Roland has finished off Conwell and the Magistrate
and has Enrico down and practically out,
the Countess manages to get the door open and
let in the two guards. They cover Roland and
he rises and surrenders. Conwell and Enrico are
pretty far gone but they manage to get up and
Enrico says to the guards:
SP: "TAKE HIM TO THE COURTYARD AND
The guards rush Roland out--Rosalie collapses.
During this fight we see a long shot of Tom
with an American flag and the marines coming
down the street.
A man running to a group of the populace and
saying: "The Americans are coming!" The
whole of this group then run out toward the
palace. This group runs to the crowd in front
of the palace and yell: "The Americans are
coming!" The crowd falls back to the other
side of the Plaza and the soldiers guarding the
palace look anxiously up and down.
Tom with his marines rushes into the plaza.
The crowd falls back and the soldier guards beat
it hot foot. Part of the marines rush into the
palace, led by Tom. The man with the flag and
the rest of them stop outside and guard the
Also, during this fight the officer and his guard
of six men take the King and Councilors out
of their cells and lead them off toward the courtyard,
line them up against the wall, tie their
hands behind them, blindfold each one and are
just about to give the order to shoot when Tom
rushes into the courtyard with his marines, who
chase the soldiers off and Tom picks up the
King and carries him and shoos them all before
him into the palace, having jerked off their
192. HALLWAY OF PALACE. Just as the two
guards bring Roland out of the Council Room into
the hall and start toward the stairs, Tom runs in at
front with his marines. The guards, seeing them,
drop Roland and beat it out the back window.
Roland greets Tom ecstatically, looks at his
watch, sees that it is one-half minute to ten and
SP: "TRY AND SAVE THE KING AND COUNCIL!"
Tom wants to know where they are and Roland
points down stairs and back. Roland tells twenty
of the marines to come with him and the rest
run down stairs with Tom. Roland leads his
little bunch into the council room.
193. COUNCIL ROOM. Countess is holding up Rosalie,
Conwell leaning against the wall side of
her. Magistrate is starting marriage service.
Enrico is sitting on the table holding his head
and watching the ceremony. The door bursts
open and in rushes Roland with six marines. He
rushes over and grasps Rosalie and tells the
marines to cover all the others, which they do.
194. COURTYARD OF PALACE. Officers just finishing
blindfolding King and Councilors. They
are all lined up to be shot. Firing squad is all
ready--sixteen in all, now. Officer leaves King
and Councilors and takes place at end of firing
squad. He is just about to raise his sword when
Tom runs in from the Palace, lets out a yell,
and followed by his twenty marines rushes in.
The soldiers seeing them, run like mad, chased
by the marines. Tom quickly jerks off blindfolds
and shoos the whole bunch--King and Councilors
--into the palace.
195. COUNCIL ROOM. Colonel Bird and two marines
run in. Rosalie rushes to her father's arms
and Roland tells Bird to look after her and to
go into the hall, which they do. He tells two
of the marines to guard Conwell and the Countess
and Magistrate. He then grabs Enrico, tells the
other six marines to follow, and drags Enrico
out into the hall, followed by six marines.
196. HALLWAY IN PALACE. Colonel Bird and
Rosalie are waiting. Roland drags Enrico out,
followed by six marines. They start toward the
front. At this moment the King and Council
come up the stairs headed by Tom. Roland grabs
the King in his other hand, calls Tom and tells
him to bring the King along; hands him over to
Tom. Tells the marines to herd along the
Council, and they all go toward front of hall.
197. FRONT OF THE PALACE. People waiting.
American soldiers there. Roland and Tom drag
the King and Enrico out on the porch, followed
by Bird and Marines. The people become silent,
not knowing what has happened.
CLOSE UP OF ROLAND STARTING SPEECH. He
raises his hand while Tom holds the King. He
points at the King, then turns and says:
SP: "MY FRIENDS, FOR TEN YEARS YOUR
BEAUTIFUL COUNTRY HAS BEEN RULED
BY THIS COMIC OPERA KING, WHO HAS
NOT DRAWN A SOBER BREATH SINCE
HE ASCENDED THE THRONE."
Tom holds up the King, to whom Roland
points--the King weakly protesting. Roland
turns front and speaks again, pointing at Enrico:
SP: "LAST NIGHT THE KING WAS DETHRONED
BY THE MOST CORRUPT AND
CONTEMPTIBLE GRAFTER THE COUNTRY
HAS EVER KNOWN--ENRICO DE
He points at Enrico, who grits his teeth and
wants to pounce on Roland, but is restrained
by guns of marines at his back. Roland looks
triumphantly at Enrico, then front, and says:
SP: "THE FIRST ACT OF THIS TYRANT, ON
ASSUMING POWER, WAS TO RAISE THE
ALREADY EXORBITANT TAXES!"
The people nod their heads "yes" and shake
their fists at Enrico. Roland points to Enrico
and says, "Look at him." He then turns to the
King and says "Look at him." Then he turns
to the people and says:
SP: "IS EITHER OF THESE WRETCHES FIT
TO RULE THIS BEAUTIFUL COUNTRY?"
The people shake their heads yelling "No, no,"
and to-helling both the King and Enrico.
CLOSE UP OF ROLAND listening to this demonstration,
turning first to the King and then to Enrico,
as if to say "Ah, you see," and then front again
SP: "IN AMERICA WE CHOOSE OUR OWN
RULERS AND DETERMINE OURSELVES
WHAT OUR TAXES ARE TO BE."
LONG SHOT OF THE CROWD--Hearing this, turning
to each other and expressing their approval of
the idea, one or two yelling out exclamations of
CLOSE UP OF ROLAND--Smiling, looking again at
the men on his right and left and again speaking
SP: "WHY NOT CHANGE THIS GOVERNMENT
INTO A DEMOCRACY LIKE AMERICA
AND ALL THE CIVILIZED COUNTRIES
OF THE WORLD?"
LONG SHOT OF THE CROWD, yelling approval, waving
their hats and hands and (fade out).
T: AND SO A NEW REPUBLIC WAS BORN.
THEY TRIED TO MAKE ROLAND PRESIDENT,
BUT THERE WAS ONLY ONE JOB HE WANTED.
198. FADE IN JUDGE'S COURT. Roland is sitting
on the bench all dolled up in a judge's rig.
Beside him stands Tom in a policeman's uniform.
He indicates to Tom to bring in the prisoners.
Tom tells an officer to open the door.
CLOSE UP OF DOOR AT SIDE OF ROOM. Officer
opens door and the King and four Councilors
and Enrico file past the camera going to the
front of the Judge's bench.
LONG SHOT OF COURTROOM, showing prisoners,
Judge and Tom.
CLOSE UP OF ROLAND looking over the prisoners
SP: "YOU ARE ALL SENTENCED TO ONE
YEAR IN PRISON--THIS COUNTRY MUST
BE MADE SAFE FOR DEMOCRACY AND
The prisoners all look at each other in dismay.
Tom steps down, starts to jerk Enrico roughly
toward the door. Roland raises his hand and
SP: "TREAT THEM GENTLY, CHIEF. THEIR
POLICIES DON'T EXPIRE FOR ELEVEN
Then Tom takes them very gently and leads
them out of the room. As they go out, Roland
SP: "WE'LL CALL THAT A DAY. COURT IS
He leaves by door at back.
199. GARDEN. Rosalie waiting. Roland comes to
her. (Fade out.)
Screenplay by Anita Loos and John Emerson