A Green Coupé

THEME MUSIC.

ANNOUNCER: Commercial copy followed by:

The time and place ... around three o'clock in the afternoon. (Fade in 
automobile, gradually growing louder.) A tiny green coupé races along a 
fashionable Big City street--its driver little realizing the important part it 
will soon play in the lives of two people. ... Suddenly a huge truck swerves 
in its path and. ...

BIZ: SCREECH OF BRAKES--A FEMININE SCREAM AND TERRIFIC CRASH.

ANNOUNCER: (Continuing.) Three hours later--the horrible accident forgotten, 
our scene changes to one of those little cafés where tired businessmen come to 
refresh themselves just before going home to dinner--and the wife. Bill Adams 
is just such a man, and he is talking to Russ Edmonds, as the two stand at the 
bar....

BIZ: FADE IN ABOVE GENERAL LIGHT LAUGHTER AND CHATTER, CLINKING OF GLASSES, 
ETC. 

BILL: You uh--seem a little nervous, Russ....

RUSS: (Is nervous--stiff.) Who, I? No ... no, I'm not nervous.

BILL: Something on your mind?

RUSS: No ... no, nothing on my mind.... 

BILL: Never saw you acting this way before ... 

RUSS: (Irritated.) Well, can't a person be quiet once in a while?

BILL: Well, I'm sorry I said anything. 

RUSS: O.K.

BILL: Look, Russ, I've got an idea. 

RUSS: What?

BILL: Why don't you drop up to the house a little later? I ... uh ... I got an 
idea Greta'd like to see you. 

RUSS: (Lightens.) Yeah?

BILL: Sure ... come up around nine ... we'll be home.... Maybe we'll have some 
laughs.... 

RUSS: O.K.--Sure--sure I'll come up.... Always glad to see Greta.

BILL: Swell.... Well, I'll be shoving along.... I'm late for dinner now.... 
See you then around nine. Oh, waiter ... give me my check ... and hurry it up 
or I'll have the devil to pay when I get home.... (Fades.) 

BIZ: FADE IN JIGGLING WITH KEY IN LOCK: IT TURNS: DOOR OPENS: DOOR SHUTS.

BILL: (Whistles a little.) Greta! Greta!

BIZ: FOOTSTEPS TO OTHER ROOM: DOOR OPENS. 

BILL: Greta! Oh, ... there you are.... 

GRETA: (Asleep.) Huh? 

BILL: Dinner ready?

GRETA: Huh? (Yawns.) Oh, I must have fallen asleep. What time is it?

BILL: Only eight-thirty. Here I break my neck getting home. Worrying all the 
time about making you wait and here you are asleep ... fine thing. 

GRETA: I--uh--(Yawns again.) 

BILL: Been drinking, Greta?

GRETA: Huh? ... Oh, no well ... that is, you couldn't call it drinking.... I 
had a little punch after luncheon with Marjorie and Vee ...

BILL: Nice girls, Marjorie and Vee.... I like 'em myself. 

GRETA: Yes--nice girls.... I'll get up.... 

BILL: Was it a late luncheon, Greta? 

GRETA: Not very. Why?

BILL: I 'phoned here after three. No one answered. 

GRETA: Perhaps I just missed the call.

BILL: Yes, ... perhaps. You're nervous, Greta.

GRETA: (Away. Off.) Well, yes ... a little ... (coming in) ... but I can't 
help it.

BILL: What's wrong?--(Biting.) Play bad bridge and lose a lot of money again?

GRETA: Oh, no, nothing like that.... I saw the most frightful accident 
today... it upset me dreadfully. This girl was driving a green coupé and a big 
truck came slam-bang around a corner and crashed into her ...

BILL: (Softly.) Gee!

GRETA: The coupé was turned upside down ... with the girl underneath!
     
BILL: Was she killed? 

GRETA: I don't know.... I was so shaken I went right downstairs and took a cab 
home. 

BILL: Downstairs?

GRETA: Yes.... I saw it from a window of Vee's apartment. 

BILL: Greta, is this true? ... 

GRETA: ... Why ...
 
BILL: I mean about the accident being the thing that's got you rattled?

GRETA: Of course! Why, it made me go sick all over, Bill. That's the reason I 
was resting when you came home. 

BILL: Well, I'll be darned. 

GRETA: Why?

BILL: (Slight laugh.) You know what I thought, Greta?

GRETA: I'd like to know ...

BILL: I figured you might have been seeing Russ again. 

GRETA: ... What?

BILL: Out drinking with him, or something. 

GRETA: Bill, how could you? You know I--

BILL: I know, I know ... that is, now I know ... and I'm glad you weren't. 
(Pause.) Do you know why I'm glad, Greta?

GRETA: Is it ... is it because you love me so much, Bill?

BILL: Um, that too ... and also because I love myself pretty well.... 
(Stretching.) Uh--here's something in this drawer if I can reach it. 

BIZ: DRAWER OPENS.

BILL: Here--see this-- I had this for you and Russ! 

GRETA: (Frightened.) Bill, you wouldn't.... A gun! 

BILL: I wouldn't like to have to, Greta--but you don't know how I am about 
you. Y' see I'm one of those kind of men who don't make a lot of fuss over 
their women.... 

GRETA: Yes ... yes, I know, Bill....

BILL: I don't go around sayin' darling this and sweetheart that-- I'm a plain 
sort of a guy, I guess.... simple-minded a little, maybe--don't know. But that 
doesn't alter the feeling I have deep inside o' me for you.... 

GRETA: I'm glad for that, Bill. 

BILL: Well, you should be....

GRETA: Put the gun away, Bill.... Please.... 

BILL: Oh, sure ... sure....

BIZ: GUN DROPPED IN DRAWER AND DRAWER SHUTS WITH SQUEAK.

BILL: (Laughs.) I guess I did go a little haywire, Gret--I mean, after all, it 
got into my head that maybe you an' Russ--well, you know ... and the first 
thing I could think of was a gun. ... A man shouldn't let himself get such 
crazy ideas like that.

GRETA: No, he shouldn't, Bill.... But ... but what ever made you think a thing 
like that about me? And with poor old Russ ... of all men.... I haven't seen 
him in ages....

BILL: Aw, you know how it is, honey.... 

BIZ: MIXING OF DRINKS.

BILL: Talk goes round, y' know--nothing you can tie down but stuff that makes 
you wonder--aw, but let's forget the whole thing....

GRETA: But I don't want to forget it.... If anyone's been talking about me... 
to my own husband ... I have a right to know it....

BILL: Aw, forget it, will you--I'm sorry--but it's all over ... y' hear? Here 
... have a drink with me.

GRETA: But rumors are dangerous, Bill--

BILL: Aw, it wasn't just the rumors, Greta.... Heck! I ... well, I was sort of 
at fault myself, I guess.

GRETA: In what way, Bill? 

BILL: Well, on my way home tonight, I ran into Russ in a bar. He was a little 
bit jingled ... and he kept looking at me like the cat giving the canary's 
brother-in-law the once-over. I thought so, anyway.

GRETA: Russ was probably tired ... he works very hard....

BILL: I know, I know, ... and I tried to talk to him like an old pal, but he 
kept acting so superior, that I began asking myself questions.

GRETA: If that's all it takes to make you doubt your own wife, I don't think 
much of you.... 

BILL: Aw, now....

GRETA: (Sniffling.) Why, I'd be ashamed to admit having so little faith in 
you.... (Sobs a little.)

BILL: Now, hold the tears, honey--I am ashamed of myself now--and I apologize 
to you ... really I do.... Look up here, Greta....

GRETA: (Pouting.) What?

BILL: (SoftlY.) I apologize ... 

GRETA: Honest? 

BILL: Honest!

GRETA: And you won't ever doubt me again?

BILL: Nope ... never again.

GRETA: It's hard to believe that you actually intended using that gun on us 
... just out of sheer doubt and jealousy....

BILL: I know.... I always wondered why people did those things when I read 
about them in the papers ... but ... I know now.... something just snapped 
inside me, I guess... but look, honey ... it's all over ... the snap has been 
fixed ... and we're both like new.... Right? ...

GRETA: Right--but poor Russ--you really owe him an apology, too....

BILL: I know ... and I'm going to apologize to him, too. Just as soon as he 
gets here....

GRETA: You invited him here ... after thinking that way about him!

BILL: That was why I invited him ... only I didn't think it was to make an 
apology....

GRETA: Oh, I see.... You were going to ... to use the gun. 

BILL: Yes--I tell you, Greta, I was mad clear through. But that's water over 
the dam--I'm going to apologize to Russ, and what's more, I'm going to mean 
every word of it. 

BIZ: BELL RINGS.

BILL: That ought to be him now ... 

BIZ: FOOTSTEPS TO DOOR.

BILL: Wipe your eyes, honey. Don't let Russ think you were crying....

BIZ: BELL RINGS: DOOR OPENS. 

BILL: All right, lay off the bell, will you?

RUSS: (Brighter, a little tight.) Fuller Brush Man! I'm working my way through 
aviation school by taking subscriptions for life insurance. (Bill laughs.) Now 
wait a minute ... may I have a minute of your time to demonstrate our patented 
combination vacuum cleaner and washing machine? It's mighty good.

GRETA: (Laughing away.) Russ, you clown,--come on in.

BILL: (Close to mike.) Come on in....

RUSS: O.K.--I'm in....

BIZ: DOOR SHUTS.

RUSS: Sorry I'm late, people--Ted and Elinore came in after you left the 
oasis, Bill, and the three of us got involved with a flock o' Manhattans.... 

GRETA: Not Ted and Elinore? 

RUSS: The same....

GRETA: I hardly know who's the greater stranger, Russ, they or you.

RUSS: Yeah? Well, when I said I was coming up here tonight they wanted to know 
if we all wouldn't drop over and have a few laughs with them ...

GRETA: But grand--I'd love to see them--What do you say, Bill? 

BILL: Well, you know there was something I wanted to mention to Russ, here--
but I guess I can do that on our way over....

GRETA: Of course....

BILL: He can finish his drink while I hop around to the garage and get the 
car....

RUSS: Uh--no car, please.... 

BILL: Why not?

RUSS: I'd rather go by subway.... 

BILL: Subway.... but why?

RUSS: I'm jittery about cars, Bill--that's why I acted so funny when you saw 
me earlier this evening-- Y' see, this afternoon right in front of my 
apartment house a truck smashed into a green coupé and--

BIZ: DRAWER OPENS QUICKLY. 

GRETA: Screams.

MUSIC: UP AND OUT.

_____________________
Originally broadcast: 1937 or '38.
Based on the short story by Joel Y. Dane
Radio version by Don Becker
Sponsored by Libby, McNeil and Libby in cooperation with Liberty Magazine
Transcribed program by Trans-American Broadcasting and Television Corporation


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