What the shit did I just watch? I don't really even know what to say about this one. I wasn't even going to try to review it but somebody asked me to and so here goes.
You have this really weird middle aged hippie woman who lives out in the middle of God knows where with her deer hunting fanatic boyfriend. She spends most of her time painting or standing around bugging her eyes out of her head looking like she just pissed on an electric fence. She has two grown children that are also hunting fanatics and they are coming in to visit for the holidays. Because nothing says Christmas quite like the feeling you get when you gut something you killed with your own two hands. The son brings his new girlfriend home to meet the family and things get off to a bad start when his mother confronts her on the front steps and subjects her to several uncomfortable moments of extreme eye buggery.
While all this holiday cheer is going on there is something big running around out in the woods killing random people. You don't get a good look at it but whatever it is glows in the dark and usually sounds like Darth Vader but sometimes it sounds like a wild boar in heat and sometimes it sounds like somebody in the final stages of terminal tuberculosis. So, this thing kills people and the son's girlfriend writhes around on her bed in ecstacy while the family hangs out and bugs their eyes at one another and play Monopoly. The whole thing ends with a psychic showdown between good and evil that has to be seen to be believed. Oh, and there is a samurai.
This movie features some ridiculously cheap optical effects that they use to represent psychic energy or whatever. Things fly off the shelves, label side facing the camera just in case you wonder what sort of soft drink or instant oatmeal these people prefer.
There is just a lot of weirdness going on. As far as I can tell none of the actors ever made another movie and I'm pretty sure it is because somebody took one look at this movie and had the entire cast and crew locked away in an asylum somewhere. This is a movie about weirdos, for weirdos, made by weirdos, starring weirdos. Needless to say, I liked it. Just don't rent it expecting it to be good or you know...make sense. |
