Title:  Separation Anxiety

 

Author:  Debby (entlzha@yahoo.com)

 

Category:  Missing Scene – “Solitudes”

 

Rating: PG for minor language

 

Disclaimer:  The characters aren’t mine.  No money made, no infringement intended.

 

 

******************************************

Present

******************************************

 

Too long.

 

It was taking too long. 

 

And it was too cold.

 

God, it was cold. 

 

Of course it's cold -- it's Antarctica, for God's sake.  And you're nice and comfy in an airplane when they're down there alone and freezing?  And you have the nerve to complain?  Jeez.

 

Daniel hunkered down into his parka and bit off thoughts of his own comfort. Endless white ice and snow below were constant reminders of the bone-chilling, mind-numbing cold outside so he turned his attention inward.  Back to the nightmare that began four days ago. 

 

Too long.

 

*****************************************

The Beginning

*****************************************

 

"Daniel!  Dial!" 

 

Jack's voice was barely audible over the whine of weapon fire coming at them from all directions.  The stench of ozone in the air and burning ground made him gag.  He could only hope none of that stink was burning flesh.  What had started out a stark and dismal planet, its bare ground lit only faintly through the dark haze of a sky, had come to life almost immediately after the Gate closed.  As if it--or they, whoever they were--were waiting for them.

 

The hell of it was they had no idea what or who was firing at them let alone what they wanted.  It was absurd.  Usually, it took SG-1's blundering ignorantly through someone's backyard before people started shooting at them.  Was this a step up or a step down?

 

Great, Daniel--joke in the middle of a crisis.  Been hanging out with Jack too long?

 

Hiding behind the DHD, Daniel tried to become as small as possible.  Head down.  Keep out of the way.  Stay out of sight.  Jack's rules had been drilled into him time and again.  A fact for which he was as grateful right now as he had been ungrateful each time Jack had repeated them.  Head down.  Keep out of the way.  Avoid being a liability.  It was his job--as much as Jack and Sam and Teal'c's was to return fire and cover his butt.

 

Except Jack was right.  He had one other job right now.  Dial.  He was the only one even near the DHD, and he was certainly the only one not occupied.  So he crept up against the base he'd been using as cover, keeping as much of himself behind it as possible, carefully slinking around the side not taking fire.  Crouched tentatively up and peeked over the top. 

 

"Daniel, dammit!"  Jack was firing blindly with his gun, the horrible staccato of its bullets beating into Daniel's brain as he tried vainly to concentrate on his task.  "You're taking too damn long!  Dial!"

 

Too long.

 

What the hell did Jack think he was doing--taking his time?  Like he was sitting here on his ass trying to decide which hand to use?  He was doing the best he could! 

 

"Dial!"

 

The last bark from Jack was without any censure, without friendship, without anger.  It was fear.  Jack was afraid.  He was afraid they were all going to die if he didn't get them out of here. 

 

Jack's fear slammed into Daniel like a slap.  He tore off his gloves and forced himself to stand up far enough to see the symbols.  The high-pitched blasts faded into the background as he focused on those thirty-nine little symbols.  Their rescue and their only hope.  He visualized the puzzle pieces that would get them there.  Visualized getting to the last one.  The final prize, the key.  The symbol that would take them home.

 

Suddenly the Stargate activated, the giant roar of the event horizon forming and spilling out into the chaos.  He panicked for a single heartbeat that someone had activated it from the other side.  Then he looked down at his hands.  Both of them were locked in place pressing with all his force onto the DHD, seven symbols lit up.  He'd done it without even realizing. 

 

A blast hit right behind him, and he heard Sam give a small shout.  Damn.  Had it been too long after all?

 

"GO!"  Jack again, wheezing with breathlessness.  Daniel didn't have time to turn around, to look, to acknowledge the order at all.  Instead he felt a push from behind.

 

"Go, DanielJackson." 

 

Teal'c.  The Jaffa was physically propelling him toward the Stargate's inviting wormhole.  Daniel let himself be pushed along, glancing back to see Jack and Sam running madly out from their hiding places.  The blasts were converging on the Stargate platform now, as though they had gotten their range.  Coming fast and furious, he felt them singe his hair and his uniform.  Teal'c let out a small grunt, although Daniel didn't know from what.  Both stumbled on the old stone steps.

 

There.  They were almost at the Gate now.  Just before hurling himself into the wormhole, he turned to confirm they were all right behind him before.  He threw one last silent thought out.

 

Don't take too long, either, guys.

 

A single, final scream of metal and electricity deafened him as he was sucked into the event horizon, and all thought ceased.

 

*****************************************

Day One

*****************************************

 

A pounding headache was the next thing Daniel was aware of.  He did a quick mental inventory, finding while much of him hurt slightly, his head was the only significant pain.  That was good.  He wasn't sure exactly why that was good, but he'd go with it. 

 

Lazily, his brain catalogued other input.  Quiet beeps in the background, gentle rustling noises around him, as though someone was working nearby. A clock ticking above him.  An odd, slightly antiseptic tinge to the air.

 

All leading to one conclusion.  Infirmary.

 

Well, they'd done it again--landed in here.

 

At least he didn't feel too bad.  That was a plus.  After you'd been killed a couple of times, you gained some perspective.  Of course, the drugs were probably helping.  Janet was good with the drugs.  If he felt more awake, he would've laughed.

 

He opened sleep-fuzzy eyes, blinking a few times to bring things into focus.  Teal'c's face, furrowed with an emotion he couldn't quite identify, filled his field of vision.  He was staring intently at Daniel, as though willing him to wake up by sheer power of suggestion.

 

He closed his eyes again.  "Teal'c?"  Well, that sounded bad.  How long had he been out?

 

"The Stargate has malfunctioned.  We came back through the Gate at too great a velocity." 

 

Leave it to Teal'c to skip the small talk and launch right into a summary of the problem.  Frankly, he could've used some chit-chat while his brain finished waking up.  He worked on it anyway.  Okay, the Gate.  That would explain the headache.  He'd made personal contact with that ramp enough times to recognize its handiwork.  Why couldn't they put something softer in front of that Gate?

 

He closed his eyes against the harsh overhead lighting.  The aborted mission came back in partial clarity.  Then he stopped to consider what Teal'c had said.  Or more importantly, what he hadn't said.  What Teal'c didn't say always worried Daniel more than what he did say.  Okay, what was missing from this scene?  What felt wrong about this?

 

It hit him.  He opened his eyes again to look at his friend.  "Jack and Sam?"

 

"They did not follow."

 

Daniel didn't even have to think twice to know that wasn't right.  "Yes, they did."  Nothing else made any sense, after all.  He was sure.  "I know they did."  Teal'c seemed to look away.  Daniel closed his eyes again.  "They were right behind us--that doesn't make any sense." 

 

"I concur." 

 

There, see?  That's better.

 

Teal'c had stopped talking and Daniel started to think maybe he'd just go back to sleep.  But something in the tone of Teal'c's latest silence grabbed his wandering attention back.  When Teal'c took time to collect his thoughts, it was not going to be good news.  He was the living embodiment of the phrase, 'pregnant pause'.    

 

"In a few hours, a probe will be sent back in an attempt to determine their fate."

 

A couple seconds elapsed as Daniel's medicated brain made sense out of Teal'c's statement.  Suddenly, his friend had his complete attention.  Daniel's eyes opened again as the real problem hit.  Like a light switch, all the haze of drugs and sleep were gone and his mind was at full red alert. 

 

What?  They were right behind me!  Right there.  I could've reached out and touched them. 

 

He had seen them in that last moment.  This was not possible.

 

Tell me this is not possible.

 

He struggled to get up and search for his clothes.  He needed to talk to Hammond.  This shouldn't be possible. 

 

"Perhaps you should remain stationary, DanielJackson."  Teal'c reached out for Daniel's elbow when he swayed a little on the edge of the mattress.

 

Daniel closed his eyes again.  "What do you mean they didn't come through?  They're not still there, right?  Tell me they're not still back there.  Where are my clothes?"  If he was quick, he could make it out of here before Janet caught him. 

 

"Where do you think you're going?"

 

Too late.  Dr. Fraiser was at the end of the bed before Daniel even saw her approach.  Damn, she was good.

 

"Um, Jack and Sam."  Well, that was certainly eloquent.

 

Janet appeared to visibly soften.  Eerily, she knew what he meant.  "The Gate won't be operational for hours, Daniel.  You can take some time."

 

Too long.

 

"No, I've got to talk to General Hammond."  He stood up, finding it much easier now.  Yes!  Vertical stability.

 

Teal'c appeared from nowhere with his clothes.  Not bothering to ask, Daniel mumbled a quick thanks, took them and sidled past Janet.  She snagged his arm.

 

"At least take these."  She handed him two white pills.  "Come back if the headache gets any worse.  And I want to see you in the morning to take a look at Dr. Warner's handiwork.  Understood, Doctor?"

 

"Yeah, okay."  Whatever. 

 

He absently took his glasses from Teal'c.  "What happened exactly?  What's wrong with the Gate? No, wait, I'll be back in a minute. Wait here."  He scurried into the men's room.

 

Teal'c was watching him as he turned to pull the door shut.  Daniel was struck by the look on his face.  Loss.  Sadness.  Grief.  Guilt.  A lifetime of them all reflected in his deep brown eyes, naked and intense.  God.  He felt a weight settle on his shoulders.

 

"Teal'c.  Listen to me.  We're gonna take care of this."

 

"Yes, DanielJackson."  Affirmation or acquiescence?  The look softened infinitesimally.  So minute a change only his friends would ever have seen it on the Jaffa's face. 

 

Daniel pulled the door closed with a vow.

 

We will. 

 

***********************************

 

No one knew anything.  No one could do anything.  No one could say anything.  Nothing could even begin to happen until the damn Gate was fixed.  So Daniel had come down to wait it out as close to Jack and Sam as he could get--the Embarkation Room. 

 

The not knowing was the worst.  If they were sure Jack and Sam were dead, they'd be able to deal with it and move on.  But this state of limbo--trying not to imagine them bleeding to death somewhere or captured by an unknown enemy-this was unbearable.  It was a feeling with which he was already too intimately familiar.  He couldn't take it if he had to live with that same nagging fear about more people he cared about.  He didn't think he'd make it if he did.

 

The Gate stared silently back at him from where he sat, alone, glaring at it in the midst of the frenetic attempts to repair it.  Siler and his people had been scurrying around the big circle all day like mice attacking a particularly tasty wheel of cheese.  Daniel had watched them unaccosted.  He just kept out of their way, flattened against the far wall, and they didn't bother him. 

 

Tonight, that Gate he'd become so connected with seemed sinister.  Like it had when he first came back from Abydos.  Nothing good can ever come through....  He meant it then.  But in the last few months, he'd started to think of the Gate with good thoughts.  Like a harsh, but rewarding, mistress.  The things they could accomplish with that metal ring, given the chance....

 

But he felt those old thoughts now.  "Nothing good."

 

"What is not good, DanielJackson?"

 

Daniel didn't acknowledge Teal'c's presence, but didn't argue it either when the bigger man sat stiffly beside him on the floor.  Both watched the techs for a few minutes in silence.

 

"That thing.  What are we even doing with it?"

 

"We are fighting the domination of the Goa'uld."

 

Daniel snorted, ignoring the twinge of pain the move elicited.  Teal'c was such a black-or-white thinker.  Fight the Goa'uld.  It was enough for him.  "It takes everything from us, Teal'c."

 

"The Stargate is incapable of taking anything from us, DanielJackson.  It does not have intentions."

 

"Tell that to your family.  Or mine.  Tell that to Jack and Sam."

 

"Do you regret opening the Stargate for your people?"

 

"Tonight?  Yes."  He drew his knees up and rested his arms loosely on them.  The chatter of the intercom broke the spell he and Teal'c had around them.  Neither paid any attention to whatever piece of useless information was being given.

 

"Do you believe they have been killed?"

 

"My head says, yes.  I mean, you were there.  You know what we were up against."

 

"However..."

 

"However my gut says, no."   Daniel turned to face Teal'c, who had one eyebrow perched so high it might just detach from his face.  "Jack and I try to only get killed together."

 

"Then I am certain ColonelON'eill will make CaptainCarter aware of your understanding."

 

A joke.  God.  Teal'c never ceased to amaze him.  He laughed slightly, catching the attention of Siler just leaving with an unidentified piece of the Gate.  The Sergeant looked like he hadn't even realized they were there.

 

Teal'c just smiled sidelong at Daniel in return.

 

Daniel's eyes drifted unwittingly back to the Gate.  "I do know one thing: Jack's waiting for us.  He's cheated death before and he's doing it again.  Giving us time."

 

"If we are able to make use of it."

 

The momentary lightness in their mood vanished.  The remaining half of SG-1 looked back at the Gate, staring stonily at them.

 

"Damn thing."

 

The Gate failed to respond to his cursing it. 

 

*****************************************

Day Two

*****************************************

 

Too long.  Too long.

 

It was just before midnight when Daniel finally gave up on getting any sleep.  He put clothes on and padded down the hall for some coffee.  His headache had been building by increments as the day wore on, finally making him seek out Janet's pills.  Not that they'd helped--they couldn't alleviate the problem. 

 

The problem was a nagging feeling he was missing something.  Something vital.  He just couldn't put his finger on it.

 

He found himself drawn to the Gate control room.  It was eerily quiet.  Only one technician worked on a computer in the corner.  Lights were turned down.  The window overlooking the Embarkation Room showed a silent and still Gate.  Cooling coffee in one hand and hope in the other, Daniel contemplated the board showing the worlds they'd charted.  The steadily growing number of Post-it notes marking worlds they'd searched for the missing pair with no success.  This is my doing.  Each world they'd tried was one he was responsible for choosing.  Every time they came back empty-handed was one more notch in his headache.  His theory--so logical in the light of day--was a burden in the middle of the night when it was proving fruitless.

 

With months of Gate travel under their belts, they'd all come to see the universe as oddly small.  It was just their job.  Some people go to offices after their morning coffee, and we go to other planets.  Traveling to distant worlds was like stepping through the door.  They met societies that were mirrors of Earth cultures.  Shared histories, shared religions, shared languages, shared DNA.  The global village was, for the members of the SGC, just a part of a galactic village.

 

But, for all the illusions they'd developed, they were being harshly reminded it wasn't reality.  The reality was they'd barely scratched the surface of the Gate network, let alone the whole galaxy.  The tiny number of worlds they'd charted were drops of water in a rainstorm.  Hardly even worth mentioning on a galactic scale.  And it wasn't a door they were stepping through week after week--it was a tiny, flimsy reed subject to battering by cosmic forces they didn't even comprehend and couldn't control.  Everything involved with the Stargate was pure chance and happenstance.  Luck and whims of fate.  The odds of finding two needles in this enormous haystack grew worse each time the Gate opened.

 

World after world yielded nothing.  No Jack, no Sam, not even any clues. 

 

Too long.

 

Those yellow papers accused him.  Laughed at him.  Reminded him that they were getting nowhere.  Every one a dead lead.  Every trip more hours Jack and Sam might not have.  More time his friends were facing whatever harsh hand had been dealt to them.  Alone.

 

And there, just below it all, the nagging sense that the answer was right under his nose if he just knew where to look.  He could practically feel it trying to get his attention.  Like a star blinking on the edge of his peripheral vision that disappeared when he looked straight at it.

 

The only thing he could focus on in the middle of the long, lonely night was they were reaching the end of the list.  Almost all the potential worlds had been searched and catalogued, to no avail.  There were only three left.  Three SG teams readying to go through. 

 

Three more strikes and they were out.  Permanently.

 

Damn -- I have been hanging around Jack too long.

 

*****************************************

Day Three

*****************************************

 

General Hammond called off the search mid-afternoon.  When SG-3 came back with their leader battered by nature, he flipped.  Unilaterally stopped the entire operation.  Daniel was floored.  How dare he?  After knowing Hammond for months now, he'd always considered him on 'their side.'  He'd even started to like Hammond--he was part of their team.  His refusal to keep looking was a betrayal. 

 

How dare he?

 

Daniel followed him, trying to get him to reconsider.  It just wasn't an option to stop looking.  They had to find them.  They had to.  But Hammond wouldn't even hear him out.  He shut Daniel out, figuratively and literally--closing his office door in Daniel's face.

 

Confused, angry, and hurt, Daniel avoided him and everyone else the rest of the day.  He felt like the whole base was working against him.  Following orders.  Giving up.  He'd expected so much more after all this time, but had obviously been sadly mistaken.  This was, after all, the same military establishment that had been willing to blow up his whole team and all the Abydonians to get what they wanted done.  On that scale, how much worth could one colonel and a captain possibly have in the great Military Big Picture?

 

Well, they had a hell of a lot of worth in Daniel's Big Picture.

 

Which meant, by midnight he was holed up in his office deep in the bowels of the silent base, making himself an overnight expert in all things Gate-related.  He'd raided Sam's little lab and pilfered anything that looked vaguely useful.  MALP probe data, theoretical astrophysics, alien technology, quantum science--he was getting a crash course.  It was the biggest challenge he'd taken on, up to and including deciphering the Gate the first time.  He could barely understand most of the information, let alone make any kind of judgments with it.  The irony was they'd always just relied on Sam to understand this stuff enough for all of them.

 

But tonight, it was all on his shoulders.  And he was damned if he was going to let them down.

 

The light from the doorway was cut off and Daniel looked up to see General Hammond standing in the threshold, watching him.  He wondered what Hammond was doing still here.

 

"You should go home, Doctor Jackson."

 

"Yeah, well, somebody's gotta do something."  Daniel returned to his readouts, effectively dismissing Hammond.

 

But he didn't leave.  Instead, he came in and made himself comfortable.  Daniel continued to stare at his papers, ignoring the man now watching him from eye level across his desk.

 

"Listen, son," he began, "I know how you feel."

 

Son.  He was trying to defuse Daniel's anger.  Well, it wasn't going to work.  "Right.  Then why'd you turn your back on them?"  He'd been trying to make sense of it all day.  Anyone else, maybe, but this was the general.  Their general.  "How could you?"

 

"I did what I had to do.  I didn't want to, but it's my job."

 

"Don't."  An accusatory finger appeared between them.  Daniel was startled to realize it was his own.  "Don't start with 'this is just the job.'  Don't patronize me.  Or them.  Don't pretend you care and DON'T try to defend that choice by hiding behind that damn desk!" 

 

"I assure you, it was not an easy decision."

 

"I don't care!"  Caught up in his anger and frustration, Daniel hurled his notes across the room.  "They deserve better!"  The sudden silence that followed his yelling was broken only by the sound of papers floating to the floor.

 

Hammond merely sat silently watching Daniel, unfazed by the outburst.  "Are you done?"

 

Daniel breathed through his nose, closing his eyes briefly.  Scrubbing his hands across his face, his fingers drifted across the new bandage Janet had put on his forehead.  He was healing.  It was unfair.  "Yes."

 

"I had to make a decision in the best interests of all the members of my command."

 

"What about the best interests of Jack and Sam, huh?"

 

"Neither of them would want any more lives risked.  You know that."

 

That Tone.  How many times had he heard it from Jack?  "They'd also be the first to do that for anyone else."

 

"Yes, they would.  And have.  But I have a lot more people to worry about. You have only two.  And I cannot decide that Colonel O'Neill and Captain Carter's lives are worth more than Major Castleman's or Colonel Makepeace's or Teal'c's or anyone else I am responsible for.  I don't have the luxury of indulging our personal desires, Doctor.  I have a responsibility to carry out.  Whether I like it or not.  And I assure you I do not."  He paused, standing and moving away.  "And, frankly, I resent the hell out of the insinuation that I don't care for those two.  I think I've earned more trust from you than that.  But I am going to do what is necessary no matter what my feelings are.  Or yours."

 

Daniel had no response.  Shame crept up his spine.  He was ashamed for his own actions.  For abandoning one of their own just as much as he'd accused Hammond of doing.

 

The general was right.  There were no easy solutions to this.  And he wasn't the only one with a daunting task.

 

"I understand, sir."

 

"I hope so, Daniel."  He moved closer again, towering over the seated scientist.  "I want you to know that I'm here for whatever you or Teal'c may need.  We will do the best we can."  He turned to leave.

 

"Sir?"

 

Pausing in the doorway, once again blocking the light, he faced Daniel.  "Yes?"

 

"Thank you."

 

Hammond just smiled, a pale ghost of his normal smile, and pulled the door closed behind him.

 

*****************************************

Day Four

*****************************************

 

Another night.  Another wasted day. 

 

Daniel was back in the control room, picking absently at the Post-it notes on the clear board.  I'm missing something.  I'm missing something big, and it's gonna be too late. 

 

Too long.  It was all taking too long.  He was taking too long.

 

He looked at the clock on the wall, its second-hand mercilessly ticking off the time.  Soon, he knew Teal'c would come looking for him, would try to chase him back to bed.  He'd been on some sort of bizarre guard duty for two days now.  Once Hammond had called off the search missions, Teal'c had taken up a new hobby -- looking after Daniel.   Nagging him about food, sleep, pills, working too hard, expecting too much.  They had become Siamese twins. 

 

He wasn't sure if Teal'c was looking to give comfort or receive it, but guarding was just what he did -- who he was -- so Daniel let him do it.  It was the only thing he could offer Teal'c right now.  And at least he wasn't utterly failing one member of his team.

 

In the middle of his disjointed late-night thoughts, he felt an odd sensation.  The room was shaking.  Only a slight tremor at first, hardly worth noticing.  He didn't even bother to acknowledge it for a few seconds.  He'd been in earthquakes before, and a year of being around the Gate had gotten him used to things like this. 

 

Turning, he saw his water glass vibrating, water rippling with the effects.  He crossed the room to look to the Gate.  No one was on duty at the controls so who was using it?  Incoming wormhole?  Maybe.  Jack and Sam?  He hardly dared to hope.

 

The Gate remained silent as it had been for nearly a day.

 

No one else seemed to notice.  There was no activity in the Gate room.  Slight flickering of the chevrons, but nothing else.  No spinning circle, no alarms, no energy, no 'kawhoosh.' 

 

That was odd.

 

It felt like the old Gate vibrations, the way it had done when they first activated it almost three years ago.  What would cause that? 

 

Wait a minute...

 

He peered back down at the water glass, desperately willing it to give up its secrets.  This was it.  This was the blinking star.  Connections started to form in his brain.  Daniel checked his watch again, noting the time.

 

Could it be that simple?

 

"DanielJackson."

 

"Teal'c," he started, just noticing his friend standing right beside him.  "Did you see that?"

 

"Why are you here?"  Good old Teal'c.  Direct as always.  At least there was something in his universe he could count on.

 

"I couldn't sleep.  I was thinking that I must be missing something and now I just realized.  We've ruled out a world we shouldn't have."  Teal'c looked even more confused since Daniel had tried to explain.  No matter.  The idea formulating in his brain had him a million miles away anyway. 

 

Or, maybe not nearly so far away, after all.

 

*****************************************

Present

*****************************************

 

Too long.  Too long.

 

It was becoming a mantra, a building fear over so many days.  They were battling time now.  Fighting the clock for Jack and Sam's lives. 

 

Everything was taking forever.  Colorado to New Zealand on military transport.  New Zealand to Antarctica on a big ski-equipped LC-130.  More hours wasted while Jack and Sam were lost out there alone.  He knew about being alone, and it was nothing he would wish on his friends.  Not even on his enemies most days.

 

Okay, maybe one.  But let's just not go there, Daniel, okay?

 

Although Hammond had cleared the way for their transport plane to get as quickly as possible to the very bottom of the world, it still took much too long.  Physics didn't care at all about lives in danger, chaining them to its rules.  They were forced to wait idly again on the longest, slowest flight he'd ever been on in his life.  He wasn't able to sleep at all on the trip -- any more than he'd been able to sleep in the days since the accident.  The closer they got to finding his friends, the worse it got.  He didn't even need coffee to be practically shaking with adrenaline by the time they'd been cleared to land in Antarctica. 

 

And the white-knuckle landing didn't help.  He couldn't suppress a short gallows laugh at the irony -- several times a month, he was voluntarily hurled innumerable light-years through a piece of borrowed alien technology he didn't understand, and he was scared speechless by a daylight landing with nice, reliable Air Force pilots.  But, they were putting down on an ice sheet, for God's sake. 

 

"Wonder what the load rating on this thing is...." 

 

He didn't even realize he'd said it out loud until he saw Hammond look his way and give a tight, reassuring smile.  Daniel was more than happy to be the first out of the plane and out into the frigid Antarctic summer.  Summer?  I'd hate to see winter.

 

More delays while they unloaded Janet's equipment and the military types all conferred together.  Hammond tried -- he really did -- but red tape followed them even to the ends of the earth.  So Daniel stuffed his hands under the sleeves of his coat and tried not to glare at them for holding up the rescue.

 

Too long.  Too long.  Only SG-1 could get themselves trapped on their own planet while their useless colleagues spent all those days searching the galaxy for them.

 

Two helicopters had already been out locating the target site.  Two more were being readied for them.  Daniel milled around uselessly, trying to become one with his parka, watching the harried dance of the station's scientists and military staff with little-to-no interest.  He was simply trying to keep his brain occupied with diversion.  It didn't help much.  At least Hammond was busy coercing and demanding, and Teal'c could be a damn effective pack-mule.  All Daniel was good for right now was to worry.  He'd gotten pretty proficient at it in the last four days.

 

What the HELL is taking everyone so long?

 

"Okay, people!  Let's go!"  He jumped at the booming voice right behind him. Hammond was hustling out of the station, tugging on gloves as he strode across the ice.   A man of determination.   More than just an officer right now -- he was a fortress for Daniel's flagging hopes.  A bulwark.  Despite the abandonment Daniel had felt days ago, the look in Hammond' eyes right then made him realize this man was just as scared as he and Teal'c were. 

 

Daniel just hadn't seen it.  He wouldn't ever make that mistake again.  He wouldn't let Hammond down again, no matter what happened out here.

 

Once everyone was stuffed in the rescue helicopters and propelled away from the tiny haven of civilization that was McMurdo Station, their small caravan formed the only life signs in a vast white desert.  A desert so lonely and desolate, not unlike the way most people looked at the deserts he loved.  He'd felt more at home on many alien worlds than he did here.  Perhaps it was simply the knowledge that this could be a frozen tomb for his friends....

 

Two helicopters against the most forbidding of environments Earth could come up with.  The one he was flying in overflowed with passengers: himself, Teal'c, Hammond, four McMurdo Station personnel -- their best search and rescue people, Hammond had been assured.  Just ahead of them, the second was empty but for rescue supplies, first aid equipment, and two Air Force medics -- one doubling as a pilot.  Doctor Fraiser was back getting the station's tiny, insufficient infirmary ready for whatever they may find.

 

That thought scared Daniel.  What they may find.  He'd been horrified when he saw the alarming variety of medical equipment Janet was bringing with her, crated and piled into the military transport they'd been herded into at Peterson AFB.  And what she'd been setting up when they left McMurdo.  If they were right about this, Jack and Sam had been out here for over three days.  With little in the way of food, water, shelter, or medical supplies.  Only what they may have carried in their packs.  In glacial temperatures.  Very probably injured.  As if Daniel's mind couldn't come up with enough worst-case scenarios, Janet had added her unflinching assessment.  For once, he found himself wishing she'd just go ahead and lie to them.  But as usual, she had looked him in the eye and laid it out, frankly telling him that at best it would be bad -- and at worst very, very bad.

 

If they had survived at all....

 

Landing was a flurry of white kicked up by the rotors.  It seemed like the helicopters were stirring up the entire centuries-old carpet of snow in one fell swoop.  Daniel tried to make out where they were through the newly-created clouds. Was this the place?  The frozen hell Jack and Sam had been in for four days?

 

It must have been -- the station personnel began throwing open doors and setting off into the icy wasteland.  With hardly a backward glance, they told the SGC personnel to wait in the helicopter.  Hammond looked like he was going to argue, then thought better of it.  They were only in the way here, grudgingly allowed to come along in the first place solely by Hammond's two stars.  Better to let them do their jobs -- give Jack and Sam as much chance as theey could.

 

Daniel watched them disappear into the snow.  This spot looked like everything else looked-barren and white.  But, some beeping piece of equipment only Sam would've understood told the pilots this was it.  He could see them out there, laying out rope lines just in case...of what exactly?  Daniel didn't think he wanted to know.  Ignorance can really be bliss sometimes.

 

He could barely make out the lead man gesture to the others behind him.  The last one turned to those waiting and waved them out.  Yes!  Daniel scrambled out behind Hammond, trying not to get in anyone's way in his haste.  One of the medics, a round-faced young Lieutenant named Johannsen, handed him a stretcher to carry and hung a rope around his right shoulder.  Teal'c was close behind him, both arms slung with ropes and harnesses.  Even Hammond was carrying a box of something.  They followed Johannsen to where the others were securing ropes and fastening harnesses.

 

Once there, Daniel peered down into the hole they were gathered around.  Nothing but darkness.  Dammit.  "JACK?!?  SAM?!?"  He yelled through the opening, wanting desperately to hear something...anything.  Maybe to hear Jack swear and make some sarcastic comeback.  Ask what the hell had taken so long.  Call him a geek.  Yep, any or all would be great just about now.

 

Silence.  Like the hideous silence of the rest of this godforsaken place.

 

Looking up, he found the McMurdo people staring at him as though he'd just sprouted an extra head.  Like Jack usually did.  Teal'c and Hammond didn't seem to give his action a second thought. 

 

Politely but firmly pushed back out of the way again -- one of the station people mumbling something about knocking more snow into the hole -- he watched impatiently as they strapped in and began lowering three McMurdo rescue team members down the hole.  He could hear the staticky radio he'd been given as it relayed the conversation.  Idle commands back and forth.  To Daniel, inane chatter.  He almost couldn't stand to listen to it for the utter mundaneness of it all.  Come on, come on....

 

Finally, "McMurdo, this is Rescue Team Charlie.  We've found 'em.  Over."

 

"Yes!"  Daniel slapped Teal'c on the shoulder, his grip lingering of its own volition.  Excess energy left over from the adrenaline rush he'd been on for days now was making him giddy.  He was sure he had a goofy smile on his face.  Teal'c just turned to look at him, sharing one of his rare smiles in return.  It was beautiful.  What Teal'c could convey in such small expressions was staggering. 

 

"I'll be damned...."  Hammond, standing slightly away from his people, as though maintaining a deliberate distance.  He thumbed on his radio.  "What is their condition?"

 

"Unable to determine yet, sir.  We've got two.  They appear unconscious."  A pause, accompanied by shifting fabric and rope, punctuated finally by the thud of heavy boots on hard ground.  "Okay, we're down."

 

The medics were waved over next, strapped in and sent down.  Daniel, Teal'c, and Hammond had to wait until last, after the rescue equipment had gone down.  Of course, none of them even argued the order of importance.  After a few more anxious minutes, Hammond asked again in that voice that even made Jack ask how high, "What is their condition?"

 

The speaker crackled a bit.  "Both alive.  Injured, hypothermic.  Continuing to assess the situation." 

 

Crisp, military words.

 

Beautiful words.

 

After absolutely too long, they were allowed to follow the others down into the already chaotic scene below.  Daniel nearly took a dive unstrapping, slipping on the ice that formed the floor of the cavern.  A hand snaked out of nowhere and grabbed him by the shoulder until he could right himself.  He nodded his thanks to Teal'c, sliding down behind him.  He looked around while undoing the straps holding him to the rope.  After the blinding white above, the dark of the ice cave was overwhelming.  Walls and ceiling loomed around them, creating an eerie mausoleum feel to the place.  At the other end of the scene stood a familiar sight--a Stargate.  Embedded in the walls of ice, its energy had hollowed out a strange pattern of circular cuts behind it.  Now it sat silent, as uncaring as its twin back at the SGC.

 

The other rescuers were already busy at work, bunched in two separate groups.  At the center of each, he assumed, were his friends.  He found he was suddenly afraid to go over to them.  To see what it was that had Janet so worried.  To find out if their fears were grounded.  To end four days of work and worry, of nightmare.  Or to start a whole new one.

 

Teal'c gracefully shouldered past him, the relief and determination in his eyes knocking Daniel clear of his hesitation.  He realized he didn't need to worry any more.  They would be all right.  It would work out.  Because the whole team was here, together.  Making it work out was what they did.  There was no way anyone was dying here today.  It was just not possible. 

 

SG-1 just does not work that way.

 

He marched resolutely to the first huddled group.  Pushed his way inside. 

 

Jack looked terrible.  Pale, still, serene.  The serenity on Jack's face worried Daniel the most.  It wasn't Jack.  Fighting.  Angry.  Hard.  Pissed.  Anything but peaceful.  It reminded him too much of the way Jack had looked back on Abydos.

 

Contemplating self-destruction.

 

No, peaceful was not good.  Not for Jack.  "Is he okay?"

 

One of the medics noticed Daniel hovering over his shoulder.  "He's alive, sir.  Looks like his right leg's been crudely splinted, possible broken ribs, indications of internal bleeding, exposure.  It's not good, sir.  Sorry."

 

Daniel almost laughed at the man.  "You don't need to be sorry.  Jack's not gonna die."  The medic gave Daniel a sad look, but Daniel didn't care.  He wasn't deluded: there was no way Jack O'Neill would die because of a wrong number.  Not after he'd survived so much.  Jack had bought the time and Daniel had used it.  And he wasn't going to die now.

 

Daniel wasn't going to let him.  Any more than he had let him that first time.

 

"I think she's waking up."  Another medic, somewhere behind them.

 

Sam.

 

He hurried over in time to see them lift her up, tucked into an insulated stretcher.  Not quite as bad as Jack looked, but bad enough.  Her eyes fluttered.

 

"Sam?"  She seemed to be trying so hard.  "Sam?"  Daniel could feel Teal'c at his side, prompting him to try to reassure him, "She's gonna be okay."  Back to Sam, showing signs of life.  "You're gonna be okay."  And he meant it.  He believed it.

 

"As is Colonel O'Neill." 

 

General Hammond moved the two of them out of the way and approached Sam.  Daniel went back over to where they were loading Jack into a similar stretcher.  Stood next to Teal'c, laying his hand briefly on Teal'c's shoulder again.  He had kept his promise. 

 

They stood silently in the calm center of a whirlwind.  Chaos surrounded them.  Noise, movement everywhere.  Radios spewing medical information back and forth, weather updates, instructions from topside.  Orders being exchanged, equipment set up and dismantled.  The click-snap of harness straps, of pitons.  Ropes shifting in the breeze created by moving bodies.  Boots trampling the fresh snow with loud crunches.

 

And in the focus of that maelstrom -- two silent, still, blessedly alive bodies. 

 

A team put back together.

 

*****************************************

~~finis~~