A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "quit
while you're ahead"?

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as
they get older, then it dawned on me - they were cramming for their finals.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with little tiny spoons and
forks, so I wonder what Chinese mothers use. Toothpicks?

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the post office? What are we
supposed to do - write to these men? Why don't they just put their pictures
on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they deliver
the mail?

How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the
OTHERS here for?

Clones are people two.

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women around to hear
him, is he still wrong?

Go ahead and take risks. Just be sure that everything will turn out OK.

If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

Think "honk" if you're telepathic.

If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that
considered a hostage situation?

I went for a walk last night and my kids asked me how long I'd be gone I
said, "the whole time."

What's the speed of dark?

How come you don't ever hear about gruntled employees? And who has been
dissing them anyhow?

After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the

Why don't they just make mouse-flavoured cat food?

If you're sending someone some styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

I just got skylights put in my place. The people who live above me are

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?

Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak?

How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?

If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold
tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

Do you need a silencer if you're shooting a mime?

Why is it so hard to remember how to spell Mnemonic?

Why does an alarm go "off" when it begins ringing?

How can someone draw a blank?

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why do tugboats push the barges?

How can there be self-help "groups"?

Why when you're driving and looking for a house number do you turn the radio

If someone invented instant water, what do you mix it with?

If Seven Eleven is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, why
does it have locks on the doors?

If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn
on the headlights?

If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?

If you choke a Smurf, what colour does it turn?

Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?

What do chickens think we taste like?

What do people in China call their good plates?

What do you call a male ladybug?

What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?

Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of

Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?

Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?

Why is a bra singular and panties plural?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't
they make the whole plane out of that stuff? Also, why is that
indestructible "black" box is actually painted orange?

If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a
freedom fighter fight?

If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?

If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?

If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on,
what happens?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?

Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment,
but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Where does your lap go when you stand up?

How do you know when you're out of invisible ink?