THE ELIZABETH SERIES
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
PSYCHOSIS
by JoLayne
EnyaJo@aol.com

RATING: PG
CHARACTERS: DM M Warren J Amy OFC Elizabeth, Caroline, Kevin
SUMMARY: Elizabeth deals with the dark quickening of the immortal
who wants nothing more than to see Methos headless.

~~~~~

THURSDAY, MARCH 15, 2001
GREECE

After a screaming session in the shower, Elizabeth put on fresh clothes
from her suitcase that Duncan found the mop closet. Her throat burned
from the obscure guttural vocal style she'd used since taking Pyrius'
tortured head. It was daybreak and the sight of the sun rising over the
mountain was breathtakingly gorgeous. A bit a beauty to absorb into her
hateful mind. 

She could still hear Pyrius' soft whispers. Egging her on. Pleading with
her to move her legs, grab the car keys, go after that murder, rapist and
thief. Don't let him get away! Instead, a glimmer of herself poked through
as she looked at herself in the mirror of the bathroom and so wanted to
remember herself. She softly mumbled for the voice to be quiet, and her
body tightened from a surge of energy from her brain. 

Duncan was in the kitchen cutting up some fruit for breakfast. Taking a
chair, Elizabeth just sat and watched him arrange the orange, banana, and
mango slices on a plate. Warren sat down next to her. "Feeling better this
morning?"

She looked at him, stared at him, a stranger. "I don't know you."

"I guess I should be thankful," Warren smirked. "You seem to have quite a
temper."

During her shower, she scrubbed so hard, she thought her skin would peel
off, all the while screaming. Damning Methos for his deeds, for leaving
her, and at Pyrius to shut the hell up. She'd taken heads, evil heads.
Logan's was the most recent and he integrated without a hitch. She looked
at her body to make sure it was still hers. It felt foreign to her. Elizabeth
cupped her hands and looked at her fingernails. She thought she got
everything clean. There was still dried blood and flesh embedded between
the nail and skin of her fingertips.

The plate that held Duncan's sole concentration was almost filled. The
stranger was sitting too close to her and watched every single move she
made, letting her know that if she made one false move, Warren wouldn't
hesitate to stop her again. Elizabeth smiled at their good cop-bad cop
routine. That paring knife Duncan used looked exceedingly sharp. It would
be useful. When she stood next to Duncan at the counter, he indicated the
fruit, "This is all I could find in the house to eat. You must be hungry. Or
should we just go to the airport and get the hell out of here?"

Elizabeth yanked the knife out of his hand. He moved to take it back and
stay out of it's path at the same time. She spun away from him and sat
back on the chair and used the knife to clean under her fingernails. When
she dug too deep on her middle finger, it started to bleed. It didn't disturb
her, it would heal. Putting a foot up on another chair, she wondered,
"Who's skin is this?"

Duncan and Warren were ready for anything, didn't want to spook her, but
wanted that knife! Duncan stood away from the table, told her, "Either
Methos' or mine."

Warren shrugged, "Could be mine."

She looked at the trail of flesh she exhumed from under her nails that
collected on the blade, licked it off and rolled the mound on her tongue. It
was a sweet meat. Savored it. Could distinguish the taste of it from the
fruit Duncan cut. Gathering it all in a ball into her mouth, she then spit it
out on the floor.

Warren grabbed the knife from her and gave it to Duncan. "She's just
delightful," Warren said with a sarcastic glint.

She watched her middle finger heal, then licked the blood off. "Where did
Methos go?"

"He didn't say," Duncan said as he sat at the table.

An unearthly voice crept out of Elizabeth's throat. "Somewhere where
he'd never been before. The coward doesn't want to be found... but I'll
find him. I have before."

Warren looked between her and at Duncan, who was taking it all in stride.
He had to ask, "For 
what purpose?"

"To take his head," she elementarily replied to such a silly question. She
told Duncan. "Then I will find you and you will take mine like it was
supposed to happen."

"What if I don't want it?"

"Then I will take yours."

Warren said, "What if I take yours right now?"

Elizabeth looked at him, smiled as if relived. "That would be okay, too."
Pyrius had kept her up all night with his pleas of ending his pain. Then a
thought came to her. "Copenhagen. I don't think Methos has never been to
Copenhagen. He does like cities. Or--," Then she shook her head. "No, not
even Methos is that stupid. Would he have gone back to Sintra? He was
really enamored by that poet. What was his name again?"

"You're asking me to help you figure out where he is?" Duncan said, "I've
been protecting his head."

Elizabeth was really curious about that and simply asked, "Why?"

"He's my friend."

"That monster doesn't have friends," she remembered the Fat Man in her
visions. Methos did seem to be buddies with him. But the Fat Man was
just like him. "He has accomplices."

"Methos is not a monster," Duncan told her once again. "You know that.
Yes, he did terrible things... at one time. It's the 21st century now. He's my
friend and has proven himself to be a good man. He's changed."

"He likes you to think so," she smiled as she nodded to him. "Are you that
easily swayed, Duncan MacLeod of the clan MacLeod? What did he do to
make you change your mind about him?"

"He took Silas' head."

She stood. She knew that. She saw that. She laughed. There were so many
immortals in that building, they didn't know that Pyrius was crouched on a
catwalk, watched the entire proceedings. Silas was the Fat Man, Methos'
friend. The only one he even talked to with a civil tongue during his days
as a horseman. Silas was the only one Methos didn't need to worry about.
The Swirled Man could explode at any moment. The Mohawk Man was
just too unstable to reason with. They didn't know, but Pyrius saw it all
after he was turned and found their camp just as they were breaking up for
good. 

When she didn't stop laughing, Duncan asked her what was so damn
funny. "Methos took Silas' head," she said. She stopped laughing to
scrutinize the men at the table. "You're under the impression that he did it
because it was the right thing to do. Am I correct?"

Elizabeth shook her head, smiled at the fool who was so easily taken in by
the charade Methos played so easily on him, "I will tell you why he took
Silas' head, Mr. MacLeod." Duncan sat at the table, waited for her
explanation, even though it was Pyrius'. "Methos took Silas' head because
you would never forgive him if he didn't. You would never again be his
friend or protect him. Methos needs you as his friend, not his enemy. You
are his salvation. I know all about you, Duncan MacLeod."

Duncan looked up at her as she leaned forward and grabbed the back of
the chair. Her face was soft, smiling, with the recollection, "I saw you the
first time when you were just a babe. I saw you as you slowly grew into a
man, as you were trained by Connor MacLeod. We both saw you, watched
you, Methos and I." When Duncan raised an eyebrow, he was surprised.
He had never told Elizabeth of his past. Did he tell Methos and that's how
she knew about Connor? She continued, "Methos saw your birth. Do you
know what happened when you arrived in this world? The very moment
you became flesh and blood? Before you were found by the chieftain and
his wife? You were a bright blast of light, the embodiment of Gaia's
prophecy. Methos knew you would be delivered to this earth. He sought
you out. He followed the signs and knew where it would happen. He saw it
happen, we both did, your entry into this world. It was as if... God himself
reached down and laid you on the grass."

"Uh huh," Warren grinned. "That makes a lot of sense."

Her smiled turned, "You have taken a lot of heads, Duncan MacLeod. You
should be full. You should have been taken back to your maker, but you
haven't. Because you have the prophecy to fulfill and it won't happen until
2024. That's why Methos had to take Silas... why Methos has to continue
to pretend to be your friend... so you could forgive him for his deeds. All
of Methos' deeds... before the immortal judgement day. Methos will not
be the one, but unless you absolve him from his crimes, he can't live
forever in God's hands with the rest of us and he knows that."

Warren knew that distorted version of Pyrius' visions was preposterous
and laughed, "You're the savior, MacLeod?"

Duncan was dumbfounded at the story she told. God's hands? Methos
didn't believe in God, any God, that Duncan knew of. It all swam in his
head. Cassandra told him he was to face evil and he had. Cassandra's
prophecies carried more weight with Duncan than Pyrius' warped
searching for theological answers. Maybe he saw him defeat Ahriman and
he was playing with him. But this was Elizabeth, not Pyrius. Pyrius had
taken her over so successfully, she was hard to find in there. 

Elizabeth violently shook her head and laughed. "Cassandra! It was
Cassandra!" Happy for the recollection of her own thoughts in Pyrius'
vision so vivid in her mind, but was once again angry that Methos let on
that he didn't know Cassandra. "She had an axe to Methos' neck. I didn't
want her to take him either, for different reasons than your own," she told
Duncan. "I forgive you for stopping her. That job was for me to do. But
you stopped me upstairs. For that I'm not sure I forgive you, but it's done.
I have to come up with a new plan. I need to find out how a man so evil
can still walk the earth. I want to know why he killed my father."

"Elizabeth, Methos did not kill your father," Warren said. "Snap out of it.
Wake up."

"I need to find out why he raped my mother and left her to bleed to death."

Both men fell silent. Elizabeth continued with heavy sorrow, of wonder, "I
need to know why he killed the best friend I ever had in this world. A boy,
just a little boy... wanting so badly to be a part of a clan. To be my friend.
To be me," she ironically smiled, "Can you imagine? That's all Jasep
wanted. They were all murdered and I was left. Only when I have Methos'
quickening will I understand why he did it. If he enjoyed it."

Duncan was sick to his stomach. He said, "He didn't, Liz," but deep down,
knew what she was saying was true.

"Oh, yes, he did," Elizabeth argued. "You should have seen his face."

What Methos, Death, actually looked like was something Duncan didn't
need to visualize. Just the sneering face that Methos showed him in front
of his apartment as he was going to flee after Kronos arrived in town was
enough for him. Warren, still new to the whole concept of David Sommers
being more than meets the eye, tried to get his head around the
overwhelming quickening that he saw her slowly digest.

Elizabeth said, "He enjoyed it immensely. The pillaging. The raping. The
murder. Methos didn't see me, or he would have killed me, too. I wish he
had been more thorough. I wish he had." She closed her eyes, softly
continued. "I wish Methos had found him under that blanket. I wish
Methos had killed Pyrius then... then this wouldn't have happened.
Duncan," Elizabeth cried out. "I love that man and would die to protect
him. If Methos killed Pyrius then, I wouldn't know. I wish Methos had
found Pyrius under that blanket. I wish he had killed him, too."

She didn't like that thought, but it was so true, deep in her soul. Pyrius
didn't like it one bit. When he once again took over, she fell to the floor
crying with each viewpoint of her brain fighting against each other.

"What should we do with her?" Warren said as she cried on the floor.

"Take her home, I guess," Duncan said, then shook his head. "I don't
know."

"You don't know?" Warren smiled. "According to her," he laughed.
"You're the savior! You should have all the answers."

~~~~~

FRIDAY APRIL 6, 2001
NEW YORK CITY

Joe was more than disappointed by the phone call. Since he had told
Duncan that he and Caroline were getting married that weekend, he hoped
at least one of his buddies would be able to make it. "That's all right,
Mac," Joe said. "I understand."

"I wish you and Caroline all the best, you know that, right?"

"Yeah," Joe watched Caroline put on her shoes then they were to make the
drive to the courthouse, meeting up with Amy and Kevin. "How is Liz?"

Duncan and Warren had taken her back to Seacouver, hoping she would
slowly but surely get back control of her thoughts processes at least. He
got through his dark quickening by Methos handing him his family sword,
but didn't know what could possibly help Elizabeth. They were just
making sure she didn't hurt herself or anyone else. The hope the Methos
would show up slowly diminished over time. He'd left messages at all his
residences that Duncan could think of about where they were. No Methos,
but that might be a good thing. With how much Pyrius hated him, it would
be a volatile situation if he did make his appearance.

Warren was hovering near her as she stared out the window of the dojo.
Duncan told Joe over the phone, "She has bad times along with the good.
She's quiet today."

"Can I talk to her?"

"I can ask her." Duncan put the phone down on the desk and opened the
door to the dojo. Warren had been telling her a joke. Duncan smiled at it,
but Elizabeth hadn't even seem to have heard him. "Liz?"

When she only concentrated her gaze at the window of Pyrius'
apartment building down the block, Duncan called out to her again,
touched her arm. After spinning her head around to glare at him for
invading her space, he said, "Joe's on the phone and would like to talk to
you."

"I don't know a Joe," Elizabeth used Pyrius' guttural vocal style. 

Duncan said, "It's Joe. Joe Dawson. Amy's father. He's getting married
today and would like to talk to you."

Elizabeth continued looking out the window and muttered, "Not my
concern."

~~~~~

COURTHOUSE

Joe and Caroline hurriedly entered the building to get out of the drenching
rain. As they were brushing themselves off, Caroline worriedly
commented, "I hope this isn't some kind of omen for our decision."

"If you're having second thoughts," Joe was surprised. "We can do this
some other time."

"Oh, get out of here," Caroline said. "I finally got you pegged down long
enough to slip a ring on your finger. The least you can do is tell me I'm
talking nonsense. The weather isn't a report on our impending life."

Joe put his arms around his lady and kissed her. "I just can't believe I
found you, that's all."

"I believe I found you."

"It's a good thing your nephew married my daughter, huh?" They kissed
again right there in the lobby in front of the metal detectors to enter the
hallways or elevator bank.

Amy walked up to them, shaking off the rain and said, "Cool off you two.
You're acting like you're getting married or something."

Caroline smiled, "Well, I can't help myself." She took a look at Amy's
ever-growing waistline and said, "Amy, you look wonderful."

"For a whale? I didn't believe the doc when he told me it's only one. It
feels like I'm carting around a whole army in here."

"Where's Kevin?"

"Finding a parking space. I told him we could just take a cab, but he needs
to leave for Boston right after the ceremony."

"Oh," Caroline said. "We were going to take you out to dinner."

Amy rubbed her tummy, "Well, I still need to eat. But I wouldn't think of
intruding on your wedding night."

"Just dinner for my daughter, my bride's matron of honor," Joe said.
"Then we're going to ditch you."

Kevin walked in and they went through the security to the elevator and the
Judge's cambers for the ceremony.

~~~~~

MAY

Duncan, Warren and Elizabeth were somewhere with a teenager with a
gun in the area. Elizabeth pickpocketed the gun. When they were alone,
Elizabeth shot Duncan and held the gun on Warren. "Don't stop me," she
warned, gun shaking. "I have to kill Methos."

He held up his hands, "I give."

She ran away. Warren waited until Duncan revived and told him. They
argue about letting her get away. He said, "If Methos has lived 5000 years,
he can take care of himself. Me on the other hand, I don't know what she
would have done with us if we were both dead."

"I have to get a hold of Methos."

"He's a big boy. And sounds like he's got it coming. Let the best man
between Pyrius and Methos win."

"How can you say that?"

"I don't know the man. I don't know how he's like now. I don't really
know what all he did then. But it's between them."

"The best man win... that would mean in your little scenario that Methos
would have to take Elizabeth's head."

"He wouldn't do that."

"Really? He swung to take mine during my dark quickening. I can't let
Pyrius destroy what they have, or had."

~~~~~

FRIDAY, JUNE 15, 2001
NEW YORK CITY
YWCA

Ha! Joe hadn't change the code to his answering machine since Elizabeth
saw him punch the numbers once at Amy's all those months ago, before
Pyrius entered their lives, and listened to his messages. It had been almost
a year, but she had a photographic memory even though, at the time, it was
useless information. Elizabeth needed to find Methos so Joe's messages
was a last hope before Pyrius could take her into letting it go and search
for holy ground. 

It seemed to Elizabeth that Joe hadn't been around for a while or he hadn't
cleared his machine because some of the messages were weeks old.
Someone from the watchers were looking for him, Blair? She didn't know
who that was, or any of them. She thought it was a dead end and was ready
to hang up when a familiar voice spoke. 

Amy had called Joe and told him the baptism was moved up to Sunday,
the 17th at 2 pm. Hearing Amy's voice after all that time shook her. She
was a great friend, one of the best she'd ever had and her voice sounded
like it came from a stranger. It was only then that she realized Amy had
her baby. She hadn't thought about Amy or Kevin or their impending
family for a very long time. Their last conversation was when Elizabeth
called her after Methos told her about her pregnancy when she came back
from LA after the burglary with Amanda. Amy had asked her during that
phone call if she'd be her child's godmother. Elizabeth told her that she'd
even insist on being with her when she went into labor. That she and her
child would want for nothing. And she wasn't there. She missed it all. 

It had been three months since she'd seen any of them. A month since she
got away from Duncan and went into Pyrius' apartments in Seacouver and
found his stash of cash, and started her search for Methos. She hadn't
found a trace of him in Sintra, London, Mexico City, all the places she saw
in her visions of the modern world. Elizabeth hung up and replayed all the
messages to hear Amy's voice once again. Three months since that phone
call after hearing of her pregnancy. It seemed like a lifetime ago. The
baptism would be the only opportunity for Elizabeth to see any of them,
and hopefully see Methos. But she didn't really expect him to be there,
that would take a feeling of friendship, humanity, loyalty... emotions
Pyrius had convinced Elizabeth that Methos didn't have, never had, never
will have. Before heading out to places unknown in her search that could
take her centuries, she would go to that baptism to try to get information
out of the others about Methos' whereabouts.

~~~~~

SUNDAY, JUNE 17, 2001
NEW YORK CITY
ST THOMAS CHURCH

When she walked in at 2:05 p.m., there were buzzes on that hold ground.
Elizabeth almost did a leap of glee when she spotted Methos actually
sitting in a pew with of all people, Amanda. Duncan was standing at the
font holding what had to be Joseph, Amy and Kevin's little boy. All eyes
were on her for interrupting the service. She covered her maniacal glee and
sat in the back pew. Pyrius was load in her head, but she quieted him as
she had been able to do on few occasions since he plunged into her head.
Amy and Kevin noticed her and seemed trepidatious that she was there.
That was all right. Elizabeth could certainly understand.

During the ceremony, she bore holes into Methos' back. And what a lovely
back it was. He wore his hair a little longer. It was starting to curl behind
the ears, saw that he kept it back off his forehead when he would quickly
turn to keep an eye on her. She'd found him. Her search was over. There
was only to formulate a plan of getting close enough to take his head. He
was nervous, shifted in his seat, but didn't let a look linger on her.
Amanda did, smiled, but when she didn't get one in return, she only
whispered to Methos.

Even though this was holy ground, she could, if she wanted, pull out her
sword and charge past the people in the way and garret the man. Just for
fun. Reenact the slaughter of Methos' village when she killed Naomi.
Suddenly, she was dizzy. That wasn't her killing those people, she had to
control her thought process. She couldn't let Pyrius take over. But he was
relentless being so close to the focus of his rage. Elizabeth stood up and
announced loudly, "Forgive her thoughts, dear Lord. She's too consumed
with revenge to think clearly."

First the priest, then the congregation, stared at her and she kept her eyes
closed and arms open wide, face to the ceiling, waiting for God's
forgiveness to wash over her. Duncan and Methos both couldn't help
staring at her as she stood in the exact position she was in during the
quickening. 

Elizabeth opened her eyes and smiled at the eyes focused on her, then sat,
only stared at Methos. The warm familiar thoughts and feelings of her time
with him flooded back to her. The love she felt in Hawaii was so strong.
His neck was so perfect, she only wanted to touch it once more. To run her
hand through the wave behind his ear. After the service, she bolted up
from her seat before the people lifted from theirs to orderly make their way
past Amy and Kevin, holding little Joseph. Elizabeth headed straight for
Methos. He moved away from her. She grabbed his arm and said, "This is
holy ground. You don't really think I'm going to try anything here, do
you? I just want to talk."

"Maybe another time," Methos stepped back, not wanting a thing to do
with her, right onto an old woman's foot. She howled. He stooped over to
tell her he was sorry. 

She slapped his hand, "I think you broke my toe!" 

Pyrius verbalized to Elizabeth, 

Elizabeth said, "Please? David? Is that still you're name?" Her voice
wasn't at all threatening. Her eyes were Elizabeth's eyes, not burning with
hatred like she had in Greece. She pointed to a door off the hallway of the
rectory. "Please? Just talk."

Methos didn't trust her one bit, but the prospect of finding out what she
was feeling or thinking would be interesting. There hadn't been one day
that he hadn't thought about her and what she must be going through. He
was only going to give her time. They were on holy ground. Duncan and
Amanda were right there. There wouldn't be any way she would try
anything, would there? "After you," he finally said.

She wondered if when she turned her back, he'd run off. Well, if he did,
that was okay. He was in the city and could be followed. As soon as he left
the church he would no longer be on holy ground. She did want to talk to
him, look into his eyes in private. Try to find the man she loved instead of
the man Pyrius needed to kill. She turned to walk into the classroom and
smiled when Methos' buzz was steady behind her. 

She shut the door after Methos walked into the room. Children's drawings
of Jesus were tacked on the corkboard. Crosses made from construction
paper, paints and glitter were taped to the chalkboard. A framed copy of
the Ten Commandments written in careful calligraphy held a prominent
place on the wall. Methos took them all in and then peered at the door after
hearing the lock click. 

Methos studied her demeanor. She moved fluidly. Gracefully, as Elizabeth
had always done, Pyrius wouldn't know how to. He guardedly asked her,
"How have you been?"

"Me?" She beamed, "Well, thank you so much for asking. I've been
peachy. How have you been, dear?"

She pulled her sword out of her coat and Methos stepped back, stopped by
the table. "Elizabeth!" He put his hands up. He talked to her only to check
out how she'd react to his questions, a challenge wasn't at all what he
expected. "This is holy ground."

"I know that. It's the only place I could get to you. Imagine my surprise
when you were actually here."

She moved the tip close to his face. He brushed it aside. In the small room,
there was no where for him to go except out the window. When she
pushed him, he went to the ground, with a child's chair on top of him. He
threw it up at her. She stopped it with her arm and got her sword to his
neck when he got to his knees and she was crouched behind him. "Doesn't
it make your skin crawl," she whispered. "To be within the confines of
goodness. You know you don't belong here." She pulled back on the
blade, making Methos fall flat on the floor, she quickly straddled him and
seethed, "Is that because you're the devil?"

Methos kept both hands on the blade to keep it off his neck, "Elizabeth.
I'm being very patient here." He no longer recognized the woman on top
of him. How could she change her appearance so quickly, in seconds,
Pyrius had once again taken over. "Put that thing away and get off me.
You don't want what will happen if you use that here. You had your
chance to take my head once and you passed on it. Too late."

"I didn't pass on it. MacLeod stopped me."

Methos flinched as her blade creased the skin on his neck. He pushed the
sword off before she could dig in and flipped her on her back.
Immediately, he was on top of her. The blade now at her neck. Methos
looked into her eyes and seemed to see himself reflected in them. The man
he was so many years before. His eyes were wild. The pressure of the
blade on her neck was strong. He eased off. When he did, she flipped them
back over with unexpected strength and once again, Methos was on his
back with the blade to his neck. 

He was livid. "Think about what you're doing! This isn't the place.
Challenge me to a fair fight and I'll gladly accept it!"

She heard the door knob wiggle, someone was trying to get in. She ignored
it, looked only at the monster under her. "Promise?"

"Yes! I can't wait!" He pushed up on her, but she straightened herself out
and added more pressure to the blade to his neck, making it impossible for
him to get leverage without allowing her behead him.

When he growled with frustration, his anger scared her. "Pyrius wants you
dead," she started crying. "More than anything in the world, he wants you
dead." A tear fell onto his face as she looked down on him. "But God save
my soul, I don't want that at all."

She kissed him, held onto the hilt when Methos tried to get it out of her
grip. She just kissed him. He returned the kiss while getting control of the
blade. He turned her onto the floor, his weight held her down as he kissed
her. Then he held down her hand, the blade was at her neck. It would be so
easy to just push down. She wasn't fighting it. She only closed her eyes
and expected it. "Look at me," he demanded of her.

When she opened her eyes, it seemed to Methos that he was looking at
someone entirely different. He was looking at the maniac who had him in
his control for three days. She lifted her chin to give him a better angle at
beheading her. A shiver went through him and he lifted the sword, this
was not the place, the person, or the situation he wanted to be in. Methos
got up, unlocked the door and walked out of the room. Out of the church.
To the airport. Never once looking back.

Elizabeth stayed on the floor with the sword to her neck. Twirled it in her
hand, making the blade flip across her jugular. When she looked up behind
her, the upside down face of Jesus peered down at her. His dignified and
pure smile registered to her as a frown from that angle. Amanda walked in
as soon as Methos left and saw her on the floor. "Liz, what in the world do
you think you're doing?"

Elizabeth's eyes didn't divert from that frown. "Does he look like he's
crying to you?"

"Who? David? No, he looked pissed. As well he should be!"

"No... Jesus," Elizabeth pointed at the picture as she sat up. The painting
of Christ suddenly looked welcoming, saintly, forgiving.

"I'm sure he's not too thrilled with you, either," Amanda spouted, moving
forward as the door opened again. 

Amy barreled into the room and stopped short to see Elizabeth with a
sword in her hand. It was the first time she saw that sight, but to see it in a
church was enough to make her hit the roof. "What do you think you're
doing?"

"Hey, Amy. How's it going?" Elizabeth set the sword on the floor and
stood up.

"How's it going? Did I hear you right? You can't pull that thing out on
holy ground! At my son's baptism! How could you do that? Dad, Kevin
and I were so happy that David showed up and you treat him like that?
What are you thinking?"

"Shut the fuck up!" Elizabeth screamed, making both Amanda and Amy
stand back. Amy didn't recognize her.

The door opened. Kevin leaned in and asked what was going on. Amy
finally tore her eyes from her former friend and took her son, not wanting
him anywhere near Elizabeth and her madness. "Nothing to do with us.
Let's go." 

After they left and closed the door, Elizabeth didn't let it affect her,
situated her coat and sheathed her sword. It was Amanda who made the
first sound. She shuffled her feet. Then she said, "Liz, I'm not sure what
all happened in Greece-."

"Methos didn't die. That's what happened. It needs to be done. Hey, I
helped you out once, do you want to help me?"

Amanda put her hands on Elizabeth's shoulders and shook her, "Wake up!
Do you realize what you're doing? You're one by one getting rid of every
friend you have in your life. Even Duncan doesn't know what to do with
you. You shot him? What are you thinking?"

Elizabeth flipped off her hands and said, "If you're not going to help me,
get out of my way. How did you finagle getting back into Duncan's life?
Does he know what you've been up to? You don't deserve him!"

"Is that Pyrius talking, or you?"

"What's the difference? It's the truth, and you know it." 

"I'll choose to ignore that because you're not yourself. If you want me to
help you, we can go somewhere and talk. I will help you get rid of that
intruder in your head and nothing more."

"How is talking going to kill Methos? Maybe I should look up Cassandra
again. Maybe she can work up a potion of some sort to make him stand
still long enough."

"Liz," Amanda said. "That's ridiculous."

"Yeah, I guess so," Elizabeth had to agree. "But Cassandra must have a lot
of hatred left over. The two of us together should be able to do him in just
fine."

Duncan, who was hovering near the door and listened, came in, shut the
door behind him, grabbed Elizabeth and sat her in the chair, then sat in her
lap for good measure to make sure she didn't get away. "We've got to take
care of this." Duncan reached into Elizabeth's coat and unsheathed her
sword, handed it to Amanda. 

"Hey!" Elizabeth fought against losing Pyrius' sword.

"Methos wouldn't listen to reason, he took off."

"That sounds reasonable to me," Amanda said. 

"She was going to take a head in a church," Duncan said. Elizabeth bit his
back and he screamed, "Enough!"

The minister came in wondering what in the world was the matter. They
were taking care of it. Their friend got sick. Amy couldn't look at her, and
didn't want anything to do with her as Duncan and Amanda pulled her
through the hallway, out of the church and into a car. Joe put his hand on
Amy's shoulder and she asked, "How did she get like that?" 

"I'm not sure I understand it myself."

Kevin asked, "Immortal stuff?"

Joe only nodded. Amy brought Joey back into the church for the dinner
that was set up and most invited were already feasting on.

~~~~~

JULY 2001
MONTANA

Duncan and Amanda were out of ideas. They thought getting Elizabeth
back to nature and peace and quiet would be good for her, so they had
brought her to the cabin. Since she had recently come face to face with the
object of her search, the first week consisted of nothing but Pyrius'
thoughts and deeds and wanting to get away. The Elizabeth they knew
wasn't there at all. Like a caged animal, both entities in her head were
pissed that they had been kidnaped and couldn't go after Methos and took
it out on the kidnappers and herself. Duncan took over as the main one
who would help her out of her psychosis. Even though he himself had two
dark quickenings in his life and thought that he would be able to reach her,
he was out of ideas.

Amanda spent time talking to her, reminding her of her own life that
Elizabeth had shared, before and after meeting Methos. Only one problem,
just the mention of Methos' name put Elizabeth under the control of the
voice that needed to kill him. She'd fall into fits, self-mutilation and
attacking anyone in the room to get away. 

After time with her, Duncan and Amanda's stamina and friendship with
Elizabeth was getting weaker and weaker. Amanda even suggested calling
in a psychiatrist. Methos had used the MacLeod ancestral sword and holy
water for Duncan's first DQ, but Duncan didn't know what was close to
Elizabeth's heart except Methos and didn't want her to get her hands on a
sword of any kind. A psychiatrist wasn't either, unless they could get their
hands on an immortal one. The thought that he butchered Sean Burns so
casually still haunted him. They could really use Sean. Duncan was quiet
the rest of the day and kept his distance from Elizabeth as she reminded
him of how he was during that dark time. When Amanda suggested Amy,
her best friend, Duncan vetoed it, not wanting Amy to witness it and worse
yet, get hurt.

One day, there was a ray of light, a break in the routine of taking care of
Elizabeth physically and Pyrius emotionally. Joe Dawson appeared. When
Amanda answered the door, he understated the obvious, "I talked to
Methos and he said there was a problem with Elizabeth and that she was
probably with you."

"A problem?" Amanda was ticked. "She has a little problem? That's how
Methos described what Liz is dealing with, because of him?"

Duncan walked in behind them from outside and shut the door, muttered,
"Amanda."

Amanda screamed, "Don't make excuses for him!"

Joe held up his hands to quiet her, "Could you just tell me what
happened?"

Duncan told Joe, "The story's the same, Joe. Liz took Pyrius' head.
There's a lot of Methos history in there. Methos when he was 'Death'."

"Oh, Christ..." Joe moaned, shaking his head. "There's not much in the
chronicles about him. Did Methos turn him or something?"

"And a whole lot more by the sound of it," Amanda spouted. "Killed him,
killed his village, turned him--."

Duncan stopped her, "Amanda!"

Amanda wouldn't be stopped, "Pyrius lived his whole life with no thought
but how to get revenge from Methos. Now Lizzie's dealing with it."

Joe took it all in, then looked around the cabin that had signs of violence
that had been cleaned up. "Where is she?"

"She's tied up," Duncan said.

Joe about fell over. "What?!"

Duncan explained, "We had to. She just had a spell."

"What kind of spell?"

Amanda said, "She tried to throw herself out the window, almost
decapitated herself." She pointed to the boarded up window behind Joe's
head. "But, to make it interesting, she plunged a knife into my hand first."

Joe still didn't know if he believed dark quickenings were a reality, but he
saw MacLeod almost take Richie's head at the dojo while he was in the
midst of it. Joe had to shoot him to stop it from happening. Then
something made Duncan take his head, while fighting against something
no one else saw. "Where is she?"

"Upstairs, in the bedroom," Duncan said.

"Can I see her?"

"I'm not sure you want to," Duncan shook his head. "She wants nothing
more than to kill, Methos, in particular, but anyone else will do in the
mean time."

"Liz?" Joe asked, like he was hit in the head. "No way."

"Way!" Amanda sat down on the couch.

"She doesn't want to kill me, so--." Joe began.

Amanda cut him off. "I wouldn't put anything past her."

Duncan said, "If you're up for it, stay on your toes."

"Funny," Joe said.

Duncan didn't mean the pun, said, "I'll run interference."

Joe walked up the stairs with Duncan ahead of him, Amanda behind him,
both of them ready to act if there was any sign of Pyrius. When they
reached the top of the stairs, they heard a soft singing. But it wasn't a song
either recognized. It wasn't even in English. After listening for a while,
Amanda finally figured out the words were Greek... Greek words for trees,
the sun, comfort, warmth. "Well," Amanda said to Duncan, "That's
encouraging."

Joe opened the door and was shocked by the sight. Elizabeth was a shell of
herself. Black and blue marks hadn't healed and were all over her body,
some remnants of dried blood. She hadn't bathed in days. Matted hair,
sweat poured off her forehead. Her arms and legs were shackled to the
arms and legs of a solid rocking chair and she moved in a slow, deliberate
rhythm singing that song. It was an exorcist look that she gave Joe when
he walked into the room, head down, eyes glaring up, the right one
twitching. Joe took a deep breath and entered the room, smiled. "Hey, Liz.
How's it going?"

When Duncan walked in, she didn't even see him, didn't care in the least.
She asked Joe, "Do you know where Methos is?"

"China."

"Why there?" Her voice was low, gravelly. 

Joe shrugged, "He's gotta be somewhere."

"He's gotta be dead." The tone of her voice and the look in her eye had
surprised him, had never seen them before. But the hostile attitude toward
the man that Joe knew she loved more than anything she'd ever loved
really caught him off guard. 

He realized he wasn't as prepared for her state of mind than he thought he
was. There had to be a spark of Liz in there somewhere, and he would try
to find her. The woman who could sit through three sets at one of his
concerts or sing his lyrics back to him as they would have a drink at Amy's
was still there, he'd just need to look. Joe took a chair and pulled it closer
to Elizabeth's. She sat back, not liking the intrusion and the bad answer to
her question. Joe leaned his cane against a leg and settled himself into the
chair next to hers, "Now, Elizabeth. I don't believe you believe that."

"You don't know me."

"Like hell. And I know you love Methos."

"Do you know all that he did?"

"I've heard."

"So did I." She smiled, but it turned Joe off, it wasn't her smile. "When I
heard, I forgave him." Her smile turned into an unnatural sneer. Blackness
overtook her green eyes. "Not anymore. He killed my mother. He raped
her first."

That was hard for Duncan and Amanda to once again hear as they hung
around the doorway. When bursts of Pyrius' visions would escape her,
they couldn't get it through their heads that it was Methos she was talking
about. Joe heard it for the first time and felt like he was punched in the
stomach. He didn't want to hear it, Methos was a friend. "Methos hasn't
done anything like that in 3000 years! People change! He didn't kill your
mother, Liz. Your mother, Sarah, died of scarlet fever."

"Get out of here!" She tried to kick out, only rocked the chair.

Joe put his hand on the arm to stop it's motion. Elizabeth growled at the
invasion of her space. He said, "No. I'm not going anywhere. You have to
let go of Pyrius. You have to remember your own life, Liz."

"This is my life! Methos ruined my life! My long, miserable life! He needs
to die!"

"Stop it! Get a hold of yourself!" 

She was pulled so hard at the restraints on her arms, she got one loose. She
swung the roped chewed wrist at Joe, who ducked before Duncan got a
hold of her and retied her down. As soon as he was finished, he stepped
back as if she carried the plague. Elizabeth sneered, "Yeah! Be scared of
me! When I got out of here, I'm coming after all of you next. Any friend of
that monster is evil and needs to be taken out!"

Joe waited for her grunts and kicks to settle before he asked, "Do you even
know who I am?"

"I don't give a shit."

"Were you lying to me before?" Joe hung back, but bent closer to her,
leaning on his cane. "You told me on many occasions that I was one of the
most talented men you ever listened to. Am I not to take anything you say
at face value? Can we trust you anymore? Do you even know where you
are and who you're with?"

She was quiet, stared at the floor, head down. Joe, once again, sat on his
chair near her. "You're safe. You are Elizabeth Bennett." When she
reacted to her name, he said, "You remember her, don't you?"

Amanda entered the room and sat on the bed. "Do you?"

Elizabeth minutely shook her head. 

Joe sighed, "That's too bad. Everyone in this house loves her and wants
nothing but the best for her. That guy is pretty overwhelming, isn't he?
Pyrius? He's a little too much to handle..."

Elizabeth half shook, half nodded her head, trying very hard to hear Joe,
not Pyrius. Pyrius was screaming for her to get free, take that jerk's cane
and beat him over the head with it. Pyrius also said, . Elizabeth for a moment had clarity. Why would Pyrius hate
Amanda? Where did that come from? Because she kept him captive, from
his quest to kill Methos? Then why didn't he react that way to Duncan? He
was scared of Duncan. Or was she, herself?

As she was trying to process it in her head, Amanda, not at all liking the
scowl on Elizabeth's face, said, "Joe... that's exactly what Duncan and I
have been doing all along. She doesn't listen."

"No, Amanda..." Joe said. "She's listening." He covered Elizabeth's hand
with his own. She looked at his hand. That was the same hand that so
eloquently plucked at his guitar. "We'll see you through this. I talked to
Methos." He didn't use Methos to get a reaction, just to talk to her. "He's
so worried about you."

Elizabeth whispered, "Then why isn't he here?"

"Because he's scared."

Elizabeth looked at him. "Of little ol' me?"

"Yes. Does that surprise you?"

"He should be," she said with bitterness.

Joe squeezed her hand. "He should be here with you. You should be
letting everyone help you, instead of fighting us."

"I'm tired."

"Of course you are. It's a lot of work to carry anger around. Drop the
anger, just talk to us. We'll listen. And we're not idiots. Maybe we'll come
up with an answer."

"God, I'd like that."

Even though Elizabeth was softening her face and body, Amanda said,
"Don't trust her, Joe. She's going to turn on you."

"No, she isn't."

"She's been like this before, then she turns... into him."

"I'm a harmless, aging, mortal man. You aren't going to do anything to
me, are you?"

Elizabeth sadly shook her head. Amanda pointed at Elizabeth's face. "I've
seen that look before." Amanda stood, moved toward the door. "She's
processing something in her head. Stand back, Joe."

"She's not going to do anything. Look at her."

Elizabeth was 'looking' completely innocent. Duncan steadied himself,
prepared for anything she might do. She did have the strength to loosen
ropes and get free. Joe looked at Elizabeth closely. Only a look of a honest
child stared back at him. For an instant in her mind, Pyrius was processing
how to use the old man to her advantage. He could be stupid enough to
untie her. He was a cripple. Getting past him would be easy. That bitch at
the door and that wall of a man at the door were another matter. She had to
make it good.  Pyrius told her. 

Amanda said, "She's ready to blow again. Joe, believe me."

"She looks fine," Joe surmised. "What do you think, Mac?"

Duncan studied her manner. Casual. Loose. Calm. "How do you feel,
Liz?"

"Fine."

"Ah," Amanda said, "See? She's never fine when she says fine. Methos
said so. And it's true."

The mere mention of Methos almost made her lose control, but Pyrius told
her to take a deep breath. She needed them to trust her.  She
looked down and took a deep, cleansing breath. Then another. Then
another. 

Suddenly, she didn't hear Pyrius anymore, only Duncan. He had knelt
down to look at her face to see what her eyes would tell him about what
was happening in her mind. They were calm, clear, tired. "Talk to us."

"About what?"

"Anything. Whatever you feel like."

She paused, wondered just what it was that she was thinking, and couldn't
come up with anything. Her mind was a blank slate. She finally said, "I'm
really tired."

"Do you want to lay down?" She nodded, not processing anything, just
thought a nap sounded good. Amanda took off out of the room and down
the stairs. She'd had one too many wounds from her and didn't want to be
the target again. Duncan lightly smiled, "Joe just got here. Are you sure
you don't want to visit with him for a while longer?"

She looked at the smiling older man and got a friendly vibe from him.
"That's okay," Joe said. "You take it easy. We have all the time in the
world to talk."

"Do I have to sleep in this chair?"

"No. Not if you behave."

"I'm not a child, Duncan."

"No, but you still have to behave."

She nodded. Watched Duncan slowly untie each of the four ropes binding
her to the chair. When she was free, Duncan stood guard, Joe backed up,
Elizabeth rubbed her wrists and ankles. They were rubbed raw from the
ropes.

Duncan said, "Did I tie them too tight?"

She remembered Methos' wrists looking much like that in that cellar when
he was Pyrius' prisoner. As she continued to rub them, she said, "You
have to make sure you're safe. I understand." For an instant, she only saw
Methos' wrists from the handcuffs. The sight sickened her. He was in so
much pain, agony. She got angry, that Methos had to go through that
torture for something he did too long ago to make a difference to modern
society, to her. She waited for Pyrius to say something about that thought.
Anything. He was rumbling around in her head, but he didn't whisper
anything. 

Duncan's face was scrutinizing her own. She said, "I'm so tired." He lifted
her to her feet. She was wobbly from sitting so long. "Joe?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for coming. It means a lot. Really."

Joe wasn't too surprised when she hugged him. He knew Amanda was
over-reacting. Duncan was ready to protect Joe in a moment's notice. "Do
you understand any of this, Joe?" she asked, each holding the other up.
"Dark quickenings?"

"Not really," he said, squeezing her around her waist.

"You're so lucky, Joe. You don't have to deal with killing people, taking
heads to survive. Hearing bastards yell at you and demand things that I'm
just too tired to obey at the moment. I just want to be normal again."

She got into bed and pulled the covers over her. Joe and Duncan watched
her and she knew it. She wasn't going to do anything. Joe was right, she
needed to remember the Elizabeth she once was. Pictures of absolute
normality of growing up as a mortal in Pennsylvania washed over her and
for the first time in months, she smiled. Then fell asleep in minutes. 

After Joe said his goodbyes and left, knowing there wasn't anything more
he could do, Duncan and Amanda conferred on what to do with Elizabeth.
Amanda brought up again what she had suggested all along, "We have to
find Methos. He has to be here."

"No," Duncan spouted. "She'll kill him."

Amanda shrugged, "Okay... what needs to be, needs to be."

Duncan looked at her, shocked at what she suggested. Amanda said, "That
woman needs to live a life, too. He's off breezing around the world while
she's sticking pins in her eyes. Is this fair? She only took that damn head
to protect Methos. What's he doing in exchange?"

"It's not time yet. I think she should be able to get through one day at least
without Pyrius talking before we bring Methos into the equation."

~~~~~

TWO DAYS LATER

Joe had told Amy what he saw in Montana and she had to see if for
herself. Amy drove up to the cabin not knowing what to expect and
worried about what she'd find, was nervous she wouldn't recognize her
friend and decide once and for all that she wanted nothing more to do with
her. She couldn't believe that what she was hearing was from the
Elizabeth she knew so well. When she got out of the car and saw Amanda
walking toward her from the lake wearing a halter and shorts, Amy rushed
to her and they hugged. Amanda was almost surprised by that as they
didn't know each other that well. Amy said, "I'm so grateful you've been
taking care of Liz. How is she?"

Amanda said, "Depends on what day it is.  I think she's getting better, but
it's still going to take time. Joe's visit really helped."

They heard shouting in the house, so they ran in. Duncan had just finished
strapping Elizabeth down on a wooden armchair as she stared at the floor.
Her shorts were bloody and was pale, but still smoldering burn marks
covered her face, arms and legs. "Good God!" Amy knelt by her but
Elizabeth didn't see her at all.

Amy wondered, "What the hell? What did you do to her?"

Duncan stood back to see if Elizabeth was secured. "I didn't do it! She
did."

"What happened this time?" Amanda asked Duncan, "Did she hurt you?"

Duncan said, "No, today she's into self mutilation. She got a hold of your
still hot curling iron."

Amanda groaned, "Oh God. I thought I turned it off."

Amy put her hand over Elizabeth's and she noticed the visitor for the first
time. Amy smiled, "It's me, Amy. Hi." She flinched back as if the woman
was a snake. Amy soothed her, "It's okay."

As if finally seeing the dawn through the haze in her mind, she said,
"Amy?" She nodded and rubbed her arm.

Amanda said, "She'd seem okay, talk to us, be coherent, remember us,
remember herself, things we did... we even laughed last night. Then she'd
get some revelation of..." she paused for an instant, remembering who was
in the room, and made sure to use his fake name in Amy's presence,
"David doing something to someone and punch herself, pound her head
against the wall, stab herself with a fork while we were eating dinner...
Pyrius must have been some piece of work."

So it was true. Meek and mild Adam Pierson, then David Sommers, was
an immortal with a past that Elizabeth couldn't handle like Joe told her.
He didn't let on that he was five millennia old or that he was of the Four
Horsemen of the Apocalypse, no details, just that David had a nasty past
that he'd come through. It seemed so odd, so wrong to Amy. The way
Adam came to her and Joe's rescue and took Walker for them didn't seem
like the same man she had begun to hear about in snatches from Joe and
couldn't fathom what would have been so terrible in his history. 

Elizabeth heard every word Amanda said, leaned close to Amy and said,
"Get me out of here, please. Take me home. I never should have left New
York after your wedding. I need my life back. Any life. Amy, please?"

Amy was apprehensive, but she slowly untied her. Amanda and Duncan
both said, "No!" when they realized what she did. As soon as Elizabeth
was free, she slammed Amy against the wall and yanked open the door to
freedom. Duncan caught her before she got outside. She clawed at him,
screaming. Amanda had rushed to Amy, but needed to help contain
Elizabeth. Where she got the strength from, they didn't know. She bit
Duncan's hand and pushed him back. When he covered the doorway,
blocking her escape, Elizabeth took off through the cabin, knocking
Amanda over as she ran into the kitchen. 

Duncan and Amanda entered as Elizabeth grabbed a knife from the rack,
turned and thrashed the knife in the air. "Get away from me!" She glared.
"No more! I'm not going to take it any more!"

Elizabeth slashed the knife, connecting with a collarbone. Amanda
screamed and fell, clasping her bloody neck. Duncan ran to stop the slices
of the knife. 

Amanda flattened herself to the floor, afraid of the knife and close call to
her neck. Given a better angle, Elizabeth would be getting her quickening.
Duncan slammed her wrist holding the knife against the cabinets. She
wouldn't loosen her grip. He yelled, "Damn it! Stop!"

"Not til that bastard's dead!"

He grabbed her hair and screamed into her ear, "Get over it!" Without
loosening his grip on her wrist, he pushed her back against the counter.
They struggled as she used her other hand to search the counter for a
weapon. There was a plate in the sink. She broke it against the edge of the
counter and plunged the shard into MacLeod's side. He dropped his grip
on the knife. She pushed him back. 

Amy appeared at the doorway. She took in the chaos and yelled,
"Elizabeth!"

She stumbled back from hearing Amy's voice. Froze. Fixed her gaze at
that woman from her past. At first, she was a stranger, but soon, all the
years being at each other's beck and call came back. Elizabeth surveyed
the damage she did to everyone in the kitchen. Amanda and Duncan were
both bleeding. Amy was bewildered by the few minutes she had with these
people, none of whom she recognized. Elizabeth was the most foreign of
all, a lunatic. She grabbed hold of her shoulders and pushed her back from
Duncan and yelled, "Stop it!" 

Elizabeth stood, looking at the knife in her hand. Shaking from the
commands in her head, and the crystal clear reality from her friend. On top
of embarrassment, Elizabeth felt like she had failed. She placed the tip of
the knife to her chest, ready to find the strength to plunge it in. Pyrius was
furious with her. He was yelling at her to get it over with, she was useless.
 he screamed. 

Before she could, Amy took the knife and plate shard out of her hands,
dropped them on the floor and hugged Elizabeth so she couldn't move.
"What is wrong with you? You've never hurt a soul in your life." She
looked at the others. "She doesn't belong here with you. You made her
into a maniac." 

Elizabeth looked at Amanda, who had settled herself in a dinette chair.
Blood dripped down her chest. The sight of the blood horrified her, "Oh,
God. Say I didn't do that."

Amanda didn't say anything. Elizabeth looked at Duncan's bloody side.
She buried herself in Amy's shoulder. "I'm sorry," she softly said. She
wrapped her arms around her. "I can't stop it. How do I stop it?"

Amy held her tight and said, "I don't know what it is. But I'm your friend
and I'm here."

She let Amy go and sat against the counter, then slid down to the floor.
Hiking her legs up to her chest, she laid her elbows on her knees and
shook. All eyes were on her as she tried to process everything she had
thought, seen and felt in the last months. She painfully admitted, "I can't
do it. I can't get rid of him."

Since those were the first really coherent words she'd said since they
brought her there, Duncan got down to her level and put his arm around
her, "That's the first step, acknowledging you have a problem. We're
going to help you through this, but you can't fight us, you can't hurt
yourself or us. Everyone here wants you well."

She looked at his bloody side, at the plate shard and knife on the floor.
Crying harder, she tried to pull away. Duncan said, "Don't think about that
right now. We're not fragile. We heal." He looked at Amanda who was
wiping the blood off her chest with a wet washcloth. "Right?"

Amanda shook her head and showed Elizabeth that there wasn't any trace
of the attack left. "See? But, I'm not going to tolerate that any longer. If
you ever deem to cut me again, I'm just going to have to cut you back."

Duncan asked, "You aren't going to hurt anyone anymore, are you?"
Elizabeth waited for Pyrius to answer for her, but there wasn't a peep from
him, so she shook her head. "Yourself?" She shook her head. He smiled.
"Hey, good news, Liz." When she looked at him, he said, "That's step
two."

"How many more steps are there?"

He said, "A couple." He was happy to see a glimpse of the woman that she
once was. "Number three is to process everything you've seen and pick out
what is real and what isn't. What you yourself needs to be stronger and
wiser... and what you can throw away."

"How do I know the difference?"

"You have to figure that out. We can't help you with that, you just have to
know that we aren't going anywhere. You can talk to us. We'll work it out
together. Then, the last step is to resume your life."

Amy wondered how taking a head could do such a thing to an immortal.
Elizabeth had told her that she'd taken many heads but didn't mention ever
having a problem with it before. "I don't understand any of this."

Amanda said, "How could you?"

"She's my best friend."

"Yes. I'm sure that's what helped bring her back. I hope she's back. I miss
her."

The blood on her clothes, how Elizabeth started to heal right in front of her
eyes, Amy knew all about immortals, but it was just too damn weird to see
it, to someone who she thought she knew for almost six years.

While Amy and Amanda took a stroll outside to gather their thoughts and
because Amanda needed air and distance from the one who almost took
her head by mistake, Duncan and Elizabeth had a calm discussion over a
cup of coffee. Elizabeth started to remember the good things Methos had
done that Pyrius showed her and Duncan was surprised that so much of
himself was there.

Elizabeth asked, "Who was that other guy?"

Duncan was confused. She was giving examples of her visions with a
random time line. "What guy?"

"You were all in a bar. You, Joe, Methos..." she paused to see how the
mere mention of his name would affect Pyrius. Happily, there wasn't a
reaction at all. "And another man were drinking in a bar. He seemed to be
friendly with you."

"Pyrius watched us in a bar?"

"Through the window, just out of sensing range."

Duncan got the creeps that he had been seen so often and for so long and
he didn't know it. Where there any others out there watching him besides
watchers, that he was oblivious of? "What did he look like?"

"Handsome. Young, or at least young looking. Well built. Short hair." She
realized she could have just as well have described Methos, so she tried to
differentiate the two men. "Lighter hair, but not blond." Then smiled when
she realized that thinking of and picturing Methos didn't awaken Pyrius.
"The man seemed to be a good friend, especially with you. He's wearing a
white t-shirt... like a... muscle shirt."

"Was it Richie?"

"Your student?"

Duncan pulled out his wallet and rummaged through, knowing he had a
picture of his student with him at all times. When he found it, he handed it
to Elizabeth. She smiled and said, "That's him. This is Richie Ryan?"

Duncan nodded, "About a year before his... death."

She wondered how Duncan got past those demons of taking your student's
head and was damn lucky he was there for her. "He looks like a good
man."

"He was."

~~~~~

NEXT MORNING

When she woke, it was bliss when she realized that she wasn't tied up.
Duncan had been in the chair when she settled down for the night, and
must have eventually left her alone when he saw that she wouldn't be a
threat. it was just her in her head. No Pyrius ordering her to be alert,
talking to her about plans to get free and hunting down that monster. There
was nothing but herself, and it actually felt foreign. 

When Elizabeth came downstairs, they were all sitting around the kitchen
table eating eggs, fruit and toast. Duncan stood and said, "Sleep well?"
She nodded. "You want something to eat?" She nodded and poured herself
a cup of coffee. She was too ashamed to look at Amanda and Amy.

Duncan started up the pan again and she asked him, "How's your side?"

"All better."

She leaned against the counter and sipped her coffee as she felt them
stared at her, tense about what she would do. She was at least showered
and changed clothes. Elizabeth didn't look at them, but knew they were
boring holes into her. After a couple of more sips of coffee, she said, "I
couldn't be more embarrassed for my behavior. I'm sorry. Amanda, I can't
believe I did that to you."

She shrugged and smiled, "Good thing your aim was off."

Elizabeth looked at her, hiked an eyebrow. "I'm not joking."

"Neither am I."

Elizabeth shrugged and smiled as she said, "Well, I wasn't aiming."

Amanda smiled in return, "Good thing." They lightly laughed. 

Duncan took his plate away from the table and replaced it with a fresh one
of eggs and toast. She looked at the plate, famished. She said to Duncan as
she rose out of the chair, "You were sitting here."

He settled her back down, saying, "Go ahead."

"You are such a gentleman. Thank you," she said to feel like she was
welcomed by them all even after what she had done. She wolfed down her
breakfast as she couldn't even remember eating anything for a very long
time. An uncomfortable silence permeated the room after she asked,
"Where's David?"

Duncan asked "Why?"

"I want to see him. I can stay away from him if you think I should, but I'd
really like to know the reaction he'd give me. I love him."

"You got a funny way of showing it," Amanda said. "Your turnaround was
that easy?"

"It wasn't easy... wasn't it about time? I don't know if Pyrius is still there
or not, but it's only me right now." Elizabeth took Amy's hand and said, "I
hope I didn't scare you away, or hurt you."

"No. Neither."

"I thank you and Joe for visiting me. It helped me realize how ridiculous
I've been acting."

Amy smiled at her, glad she helped, but didn't know what that meant
about Pyrius. It seemed she was talking to her friend, so she opened the
locket she wore and showed it to Elizabeth. "This is my little boy. Joseph."

"Oh," Elizabeth fell apart, wishing she would have been there for Amy,
and wouldn't have made a fool of herself at his christening. "He's
adorable."

"Why don't you come and see him? We'd love to have you."

Duncan didn't think it was time for that. She still had work to do. "I can't
do that yet," Elizabeth agreed. "I'm still a little shaky. Maybe some day."

"Make it soon."

Elizabeth looked at Duncan and asked, "Are we anywhere near a store?"

"A grocery store."

"No," Elizabeth smiled. "I need a Radio Shack or Circuit City or
something. I'd like to buy a laptop with my money." She looked at
Amanda, who smiled and winked. 

"What for? You can use mine."

"No. I don't want you to see what I need to do."

Duncan knelt by her, wondered if they should be nervous or not. Elizabeth
said, "I'm going to do something I think might help. That will help both of
us, David and I. I'm sorry, Duncan, but it's private."

CONTINUED in Chapter 14 - PTSD

    Source: geocities.com/enyajo/elizabeth

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