MAKERS OF ERAP SUCKS PAGE SLAPPED WITH SEDITION CHARGES!!!

The makers of the Erap sucks page regret to inform you that most of the staff of this website are currently in prison awaiting trial, wherein they are accused of sedition. Not satisfied with merely banning the Erap sucks page and forcing advertisers to pull their respective ads from the site, Erap decided to take the makers of the Erap sucks page to court. Citing what he calls farce

information, biased views, unflattering pictures of my handsome face, inciting a revolt against
an elected president, and blatant lies; the president publicly berated the Erap sucks page.
The presidential spokesperson said that Erap was sick and tired of all this bullshit and that he
decided to put an end to the the lies and the campaign against his honorable self. First of all,
Erap said that the monicker "Erap sucks" is misleading. According to Erap, he does not suck
daw. Erap proudly told members of the media that he does not suck because he is the one
being sucked on most of the time. He even presented one of his mistresses to the media as
a witness. The young woman, known only as "Julie," told members of the press yesterday
makers of erap sucks page in jail!  

that Erap does not suck (according to her, the president only licks), she went on to say that the only time sucking enters their relationship is when the president asks her to do so.

The president did not stop there, he even presented to the media both his wife (Loi Ejercito) and
his son (Jinggoy Estrada), saying that they were both emotionally distraught by the filth being
posted by the Erap sucks page. Loi testified saying that she did not mind the Erap sucks page
writing all those things about about her husband frequently having oral sex with camels, drinking
beer for breakfast, having body odor which smells of sour cream and onions, doing his cronies
large favors, and being as dumb as shit. In fact, Loi said that all of these things are 100% true.

What the first lady took offense to was the story the Erap sucks page published concerning the first lady no longer giving the president sexual pleasure and satisfaction. The first lady said she spent sleepless nights crying after she read the online article which stated that "The first lady is sterile old bag of tae ng kalabaw who couldn't turn me on even if I had gulped down 6 pills of ecstacy. I wouldn't hump her even if she paid me 100,000,000,000,000 pesos and promised to put a paper bag over her head while we were having sex.

Aside from Loi testifying against the Erap sucks page, the first son, Jinggoy also had a few words for the makers of the Erap sucks page. The San Juan mayor told the media that he lost thousands of pesos in ticket sales when the Erap sucks page said that Jinggoy's films were a bunch of baduy bullshit which would lower the IQ of anyone watching it. The first son (who starred in such films as Bobocop 2, Mr. Libog, Pasukin mo sa pwet ko, and Mahal kita, galing diba?) went on to say, that his films were very intelligent and provocative and only people who dont appreciate true art would call it baduy.

The makers of the Erap sucks page are now in Bilibid prison awaiting ther trial. Check back on the Erap sucks page for more updates on this groundbreaking story.

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