Object:

Description:

Accommodation Spell:

Packaged by a magician named Yin-Yang to make the two who use it compatible in every way physically necessary for interbreeding. It is continually invokable, and does not dissipate after being used once. It is the size and shape of a grain of rice, most suitable for facilitating weddings.

Address:

Where the Good Magician Humfrey can be found, if you can figure it out.

Adult Conspiracy:

Its full name is the Adult Conspiracy to Keep Interesting Things From Children. It's really annoying.

Age Springs:

A trap for the unwary, as water drunk from this spring hastens old age, for what reason no adults will say.

Agony Column:

Tall pillar of marble upon which sufferers lie to cause their pain to abate.

Apology:

In the gourd, one apologises by giving a passionate kiss to the person whom one has offended. This pleasant custom has spread out into Xanth.

Beachcomber:

Giant comb that sweeps all the debris out of the sand of a beach, then piles it up to be moved to a dumping site.

Babbling Brook:

Freshwater stream that can talk. And talk it does.

Blue Agony Fungus:

Glows blue and has a dry, pleasant odour, but it turns the body of its agonised victims blue and melts them into a puddle that kills all the vegetation where it soaks in. It used to be used for executions during the early Waves of Colonisation.

Book of Answers:

Humfrey's gigantic personal tome of Information, which is the ultimate authority on every subject in Xanth.

BootRear:

A drink that tastes like RootBeer but with an impacting effect that makes a strong impression.

Bottomless Pith:

Fibre used to make bags with nearly infinite capacity.

Castor Oil:

A vile substance which adults make children eat because it tastes dreadful. It leaks from castors when they roll too far.

Chocolithic Rock:

Veins of tasty brown rock from which chocolate chips are mined.

Cloudstones:

Stepping stones made of cloud that one can use to cross the sky.

Conniptions:

Nasty little things that aggravate folks to the point of rage, especially when there is already a problem.

Coral Sponges:

The remains of migratory sponges, they absorb pain and spread healing comfort.

Cottage Cheese:

Large cheese that, when hollowed out, hardens and is quite suitable as a domicile. They grow, but are not plants.

Crewel Lye:

A mixture used to clean the magic tapestry in Castle Roogna.

D-Tails:

The hinder parts of bulls and bears, to which Mundanes pay close attention.

D-Tour:

An illusion that can be planted on an enchanted path to cause a traveller to change direction.

Dark Lantern:

This lamp spreads a beam of darkness.

Darning Egg:

Ovid stone which nice girls use to rid themselves of curse burrs.

Deathstone:

A rare rock which radiates an aura of death. One was adapted and used as the Shieldstone to protect Xanth from invaders for many centuries.

Dime:

Tiny silver object that causes things passing over it to stop. It can only be used twelve times before it wears out, hence the term "dime a dozen."

Drying Stone:

This flat rock generates warm radiation to soothe anything near it that is cold or wet.

Ectoplasm:

A squishy cloud of formless matter in the gourd. It trails pale, sticky white streamers from its mass, and can stretch just like taffy. It is hard to detach from anything it touches.

Enchanted Mountain:

A replica of aspects of Xanth in the dream realm, in the form of a towering mountain, Accessed by the Frankinmint plant.

Enchanted Paths:

These trails abound throughout Xanth. They can defy gravity, carrying their passengers high through the air in a loop-de-loop, submerge them underwater without drowning or carry them under the earth. Evil magic can't exist on a charmed magical path, so pedestrians are protected while they remain on one. Some exist in only one direction.

Evil Eye:

Shoots a beam of light that can blind, stun or kill.

Eye Scream, Eye Smilk:

The eyes of these birds are rich and delicious. They may be served frozen as a special dessert treat. Scream birds are skinny and bony. All they eat goes to add size and richness to their great yellow eyes. They feed on eye plants, like eyebright, eye-rises, eye-o'-the-day flowers, and the like. (Demons eat and imitation of this treat, which is made from the toe of the fo bird, but frozen toe-fo is inferior in flavor to eye-scream.) Eye scream tastes very good served in crunchy pine cones.

Fan Club:

A length of wood with which a fan can place itself in the middle of fandom.

Fantasy Fan:

A bamboo fan that has a magic picture on it when it is spread open. It makes the wielder think he is cooler than he is, especially when the picture is of a snowscape. Periodically, the fans gather together from all over Xanth for a convention where they shoot the breeze and blow a lot of hot air, and decide who is the secret master of fandom.

Fan-Tom:

An image of a fantasy fan that lacks substance.

Figment:

An illusionary figure. Gina Giantess started out as one, but Girard's love made her a regular dream figure.

Firewater Opal:

Mela Merwoman's prize, which she needed to gain a husband. She enlists Prince Dolph's aid to recover it, because Draco Dragon "acquired" it from her now late husband.

Fire, Water, Sand:

A gambling game popular in Xanth, played by simultaneously offering a hand sign indicating one of the three elements: a closed fist means sand, a flat hand means water, and the first two fingers forked means fire. Depending on who is playing, fire evaporates water, water covers sand, and sand smothers fire; or water douses fire, sand displaces water, and fire melts sand. If both players offer the same symbol, the round is a tie, and play continues. The rules should be discussed before play begins.

Firecracker:

Flaming cracker that explodes in pretty sparkles when crunched.

Firewater:

Streams, pools or fountains of orange water which cascade and steam naturally. Firewater is used for cooking, but is too hot for bathing.

Fish River:

A stream that turns all that drink from it to fish.

Fog Horns:

Tall, treelike horns which blast out columns of fog to obscure the forest paths.

Foot-Ball:

Every kind of extremity that there is, hooves, feet, claws, talons, paws, insect legs, growing on the outside of a sphere which rolls by itself all over Xanth.

Forget-Whorl:

Piece that has broken off from the Gap's Forget Spell. These wander randomly across the land, causing memory lapses.

Freshman English:

A fate worse than death, in Mundania.

Golden Fleas:

The fabulous metallic fleas of a dragon, sought by Ja-son, a foolish Mundane.

Gorgon-Zola:

A delicious, half-petrified cheese made by the Gorgon by staring at milk through her veil.

Hand-Ball:

Related to the football, a sphere of hands, paws, wings, and claws that roll around Xanth. Frequently used for games by ogres.

Handkerchoo:

Delicate square of cloth used for containing sneezes.

Hate Spring:

Makes anyone who touches its water hate the next person seen. Used by the Goblinate of the Golden Horde to torment captives.

Hayberry Longcake:

A delicacy. There is an inferior substitute in Mundania, using short straw instead of long clay.

Headstone:

Magic rock, which takes on the appearance of whoever is buried nearby.

Healing Spring:

Heals completely all wounds, rashes, diseases, bruises, amputations(deliberate or accidental) except for beheading. It may lay a geis on any user to protect the pool in exchange for its benefits.

Heaven Cent:

A penny piece that sends the wearer to the place most needed; it can be charged only by Electra.

Hem Lock:

A border plant that can be set at the hem of a dress. Once locked, it will never slip off.

Honey Comb:

B's use this to comb honey from honeysuckle and honeymoons.

Honeymoon:

The far side of the moon, which remains as sweet as honey, and is popular with the newly married. The near side of the moon, of course, has long since been corrupted to green cheese because of the horrible sights it sees below.

Hope Chest:

A special box that grows on cedar-chest trees. It can safely contain insubstantial magic like hope or love.

Hot Cross Buns:

Similar to patti cakes, these inflict warm stripes across the same part of the body that patti cakes pat.

Icicle:

This sickle is made of the purest white non-melting ice. It has a cutting edge on its inside curve, which can be sharpened by honing it over a torch.

Infinate Decimal:

A tiny dot which precisely and impersonally judges the fairness of matters to the smallest degree.

Jigsaw Puzzle:

No two pieces fit together unless requested by the correctly worded plea, which is different for each match. The portions of the picture that show, unlike Mundane puzzles, keep changing.

Ladder, Enchanted:

A useful device that anchors permanently to any wall until someone calls out "weigh anchor!" which causes it to kick loose violently.

Lemon Harangue Pie:

A sour little pastry that throws insults all around.

Lepermud:

This dead white liquid clay infects all it touches with leprosy.

Lexicon:

All the properly forgotten things of Xanth, compiled into a list by three curious Mundanes.

Life Clay:

It can be moulded into the semblance of any living creature. It will then behave as such, except that it will not die when cut into pieces ; it will merely reform as several small models of the original creature.

Lightning Bolts:

Bolts which fall from the sky during storms. They do a lot of damage if they strike too close to anything. When they cool they are good for bolting things together.

Lines and Boxes:

A popular game of strategy in Xanth.

Living Room:

A room, which wanders about on its own legs, seeking to find itself a home.

Lost Path:

The path along which all lost things lie, from artefacts to people.

Love Spring:

This natural pool causes any two species that drink wish to mate (including plant life). This is chiefly how new conglomerate species are engendered.

Lunatic Fringe:

A protective illusion of madness woven out of the light of the full moon to scare off intruders.

Magic Mirrors:

Very rare. Humfrey uses them for a variety of purposes; divination of questions that can be answered yes or no, long-distance communication, and magical observation of distant scenes. Others are used by the Royal Family to keep in touch with one another.

Magic Stones:

Have varied types of magic proper to stones, such as to divert streams over them or to cause damage to humans.

Magic Wand:

A stick that holds a powerful spell that anyone can use. Gwendolyn Goblin has one that levitates objects or people. It can be attuned to a person by spelling out your initials with it.

Magnifying Glass:

A Mundane device that in Xanth makes things bigger.

Memory Crystal:

A huge cut crystal resting in a sunny grove where it can pick up the best sunlight. Each of the crystals many facets reveal a different memory to anyone who looks into it.

Midnight Sunstone:

The rarest of all gems, it glows as brightly as the sun when there is no other light.

Milkshakes:

Milkweed pods which, when opened, quake and shiver, spilling half their contents.

Mocolate Chilk:

Tasty brown fluid that comes from mocolate choo-cows.

Monster Cheese:

A delicious cheese that makes a human act like a monster. On real monsters, it has no side affects. The more ladylike version is monsterella. Variants exist in Mundania: muenster and mozzarella. (Sorry, we're not responsible for crazy Mundane spelling!!) See also Gorgon-zola.

Moonstones:

Little pocked globes that shine silvery green with the light of the moon. Their outline reflects the quarter of the moon showing in the sky.

Mouth Organ:

Big plant made up of mouths of all sizes and shapes, plays music. Little ones can be picked and played by hand. They are part animal, vegetable, and mineral. The organ pipe cactus is a related species.

Mussels:

Clam-like things that pull shells closed.

Oil Slicks:

These puddles lie on the surface of the ground, the products of tanker trees that have inadequately disposed of their wastes. The oil is slipperier than almost any other substance in Xanth, and can propel a walker headlong into obstacles. They have sentience to a limited degree, and a mean sense of humour.

Opposite Sex:

By the order of the Adult Conspiracy, this definition has been censored. What would happen if children found out which one it was?

Panties:

Object of much speculation in Xanth: exactly what colour are they? Boys under the Age of Consent are not permitted to speculate. It is part of the Adult Conspiracy.

Post Orifice:

A delivery system that gums everything up.

Patti Cake:

You should eat this sitting down, or it will pat you. Fresh patti cakes give pretty fresh pats, so you should protect any part you don't want patted.

Pennies:

Round bits of metal that fall from the sky. Single penny bits have one delicious perfume scent. Twopenny bits have two scents, sixpenny bits have six scents, and so on. Not to be confused with the Heaven Cent.

Pied-Piper Flute:

Once begun, this flute will play itself and attract any creature into following it.

Purple Bouillon:

A delicacy in Xanth, wrung from purple wood by ogres.

Quicksand:

It speeds you up.

Rainbow:

A banded arc of colour in the sky containing every colour in the spectrum. Between the bands of visible colour are the translucent colours, and some hues lie in patterns, such as polkadot, plaid, and checkerboard. Some of the colours have never been imagined by man, such as Fortissimo, Charm, Phon, and Torque. The rainbow is fussy about where and under what conditions it appears in the sky, and it works on a very tight schedule, so it never remains anywhere very long. It keeps a set distance from those viewing it, so that it is fixed as long as one keeps looking at it. The rainbow is one of the most fabulous sights in Xanth or Mundania, for this is one of the only types of magic which appears in both lands.

Red Tape:

Festoons of red ribbon that prevent movement by tying things up and presenting physical impediment.

Revised Simplified Tax Manual:

A source of limitless gibberish, used by Mae Meanad for oracles and by Mundanes for annual aggravation in the month of Apull.

Rolling Hills:

Topographical features that can be a hazard to travelers because they really roll.

Sad Sacks:

Gloomy-colored but strong fiber bags that grow on low bushes.

Sand Dune:

A heap of sand that moves on to beaches and takes them over; it rolls over prey and smothers them to eat at leisure. It believes that it is preserving fossils for posterity. It doesn't attack at night.

Seaweed Soup:

Wholesome and nutritious, therefore a torment to children. Mela Merwoman feeds it to Prince Dolph. See Adult Conspiracy.

Shadow Of A Doubt:

A deep, dark gloom which dissipates when ignored.

Sharpening Stone:

Casts keen edges on any knife or axe brought into contact with it.

Shoefly Pie:

Filled with shoes, boots, slurpy leathery juices, delicious laces and soles, this huge pastry is a treat fit for an ogre.

Shower Cap:

From this useful hat, water rushes down your person to the ground and back up again, magically washing you clean without spilling the water.

Sign Language:

Understood by animals in Xanth, if people have the wit to approach them with it, and by a select group of Mundanes.

Skeleton Key:

Needed to find the Heaven Cent. At first thought to be an isle, it turns out to be a rib Grace'l posesses, which sounds the Grace note in the key of G. Female skeletons have one more rib than male skeletons, because the missing rib was used by the Demon X(A/N)th to form the first female skeleton for the fist male skeleton, who was lonely.

Skinflint:

Small brass scales from the City of Brassies used for covering and protecting wounds (or dents) until they heal. Can be used on human flesh as well.

Slowsand:

Prevents one from getting through the region by slowing their progress to a crawl. One can die of starvation wading through slowsand. Even a jump over it can take forever.

Soda Water Springs:

Natural effervescent springs that come in several flavors, such as lime, strawberry, cream soda, celery, or orange.

Soapstones:

These scented or unscented balls of rock lather up nicely when rubbed in the hands with water.

Summersalt:

A seasonal wandering white globe made of salt that explodes into powder if struck.

Spec-Tackles:

Ghostly creatures with glassy eyes and big shoulders.

Sponge:

Natural cushions that soothes pain and spreads healing comfort.

Stares:

A means of attaining the next level in the Bookworm's cavern. By meeting the gaze of each successively higher statue, one is lifted magically through the air.

Stepping Stone:

Stone which expands in water to provide a broad but not steady step. The top protrudes just above the water.

Sugar Sand:

Found in patches throughout Xanth, it is one of the nicest additions to a meal. Unlike the Mundane equivalent, sugar sand does not cause cavities. Naturally sweet things grow in it.

Tail-Lights:

Fluffy little animals that hop which have glowing cottony tails.

Tangles:

They start out as tiny snarls in children's hair or horses tails, but grow into huge tangle trees.

Technicolor Hailstorms:

Puffy and light stones made of magic dust that fall out of the sky that sting when they strike.

There Restorer:

Potion used to re-embody ghosts.

Tire Iron:

This mace-shaped weapon tires anyone it strikes so much they go to sleep.

Twister:

Deadly storm, much like those in Mundania, but these twist houses and trees into corkscrews. Tangle trees are braided, and wheatfields are cornrowed, by these fearful spiraling winds.

Two Minute Replay:

A gift to Onda and Max from the Time Being which enables them to replay two minutes of time.

Typewriter:

Mundane philosophical device used for generating wisdom.

Uroborus:

A legend in Xanth about a giant serpent who was so large it encircled the Mundane world and grasped its own tail.

Vomit Fungus:

Found in only the Region of Madness or anywhere a monster wants to liven up his abode with appropriate decoration. It hangs in disgustingly greasy streamers, and looks distressingly real.

Vitamin F:

Which puts the F in F-ect if you put forth the right F-ort, and has been lost in the gourd for centuries along the Lost Path. Not to be confused with Vitamin X, which is for X-perts.

Washing Powder:

A useful spell to get clothes clean, but it has to be kept in a sealed container because it is always running out. When it is poured into water, it makes the water wash up and down against the sides of its container.

Watch:

Magic amulet of Mundanian design which can find things. It is called a watch because it watches things with its single eye.

Wild Fruitcakes:

Dangerous when cornered, kinda crazy, but delicious.

Wood Wind:

A living plant that can be played as a musical instrument. It is long and hollow, with holes along its stem. It blows out much more wind than it takes in.

Worm:

A computer game nominally put out by Vaporware Limited. It promises a lot, if you wait long enough. It installed Com-Pewter's Sending in Grey Murphy's computer. It was sent to Mundania by Com-Pewter as part of a nefarious plot. However it has ideas of its own on what it plans to do in the future, which has nothing to do with Com-Pewter's instructions. If the computer containing the Worm is running, Xanthians in the vicinity can understand Mundane speech.

Worry Wart:

A wart you may get on your head. When you scratch it, you become worried. Sometimes they are impossible to ignore.