I Was A Monster Teenager (as if there's a difference?)
          Teenage Frankenstein
   Best line: "You have a civil tongue in your head.I sewed it in myself"
  This is top of the line 1950's B movie schlock.And it is
wonderful.Countless tv viewings and a recent VHS viewing confirms
this.
  Prof Frankenstein(Whit Bissel)is visiting from England on a lecture
tour.He wants to create a perfect body from a youth.As it so happens there is a
terrible auto accident outside which allows him to grab a corpse.Some guys have
all the luck.
  Of course there is the hesitant assistant to deal with. There is also the
nosy just moved in fiancee to contend with. Frankenstein manages to put
together a body but it has a severe case of morning face.The boy disobeys
his creator and goes out for a stroll. He also kills a blonde and creates a panic.
  Well the pesky bride to be stumbles upon the "monster" which angers the
mad doctor to no end. He convinces the boy that she wants to kill him. So our
boy kills her and she is dumped in the alligator pit(I'm not making this
up).The pit is used to dispose of spare parts by the way.
  Now I have never ever been able to rent (or buy) a house that has
an indoor alligator pit.Trust me, I have looked.I want one.It would be a great selling
point as a tool to get rid of salesmen, politicians stumping for votes and that $#@%^$g kid next door playing rap records too loudly.
  Anyway, the monster needs a nice face(does he ever)so he and the doctor go out in
search of one.Happily they locate one and it is grafted on.Everybody is all
smiles now.In fact, the kid can't stay away from a mirror for more than 10 seconds.
  The doctor and his assistant prepare to go to England. The boy has no passport so they plan to dissect him for easier international travel.The rousing finish is in color.
  Whit Bissel gives a great performance as the cracked to the max mad
doctor.Defintely worth watching.DVD anybody?
          
I Was A Teenage Werewolf
  Well actors have to start somewhere.Michael Landon was the star of this
flick which won him fans the world over.It would have been a hoot to see
this tied into an episode of Bonanza when he hit it big on tv:
  "Pa! Pa! Little Joe's gone all hairy and he's droolin' something fierce!".
"Hold on Hoss, I'll get ma gun!" "Hey!What's he doing on my leg!Get 'im offa
my leg Pa!"."He sure looks funny doing that Hoss.Looks like he's doing the
Tennessee Two Step.He's a goin real fast too!Hold still now!" BLAM!BLAM!Yipe yipe yipe!
  Landon plays Tony, a real short tempered rebellious teen. He's always trying to
beat on somebody.So in typical 50's fashion he is sent to a hypnotist played
as usual by Whit Bissell.The mad doctor hypnotizes Tony and turns him into a hairy,
drooling fanged monster. You know, a teenager.(And you thought pimples and
unexpected pup tents were bad enough).
  There are some effective scenes like the one in which the werewolf attacks
a gymnist in school.The drooling hairy werewolf turns the town upside down in
his lust for blood.
  This is a fun movie that needs to be on dvd.
Going cruising for the first time.Too bad it is with his "dad".
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