Snakes on a plane.

Muthafucking snakes on a muthafucking plane.

Mutha. Fucking. Snakes. On. A. Mutha. Fucking. Plane.

GET THESE MUTHAFUCKING SNAKES OFF THIS MUTHAFUCKING PLANE!!!!!

The idea was promising. It could be made into the greatest movie ever. Samuel L. Jackson called you on your phone and told you to see it or he'd kick your ass. He said it would be the best movie ever. The calls may have been recorded, but that didn't mean it was a lie. We all thought it would be so bad that it's good. So bad that it's AWESOME!!

Unfortunately, it was not bad enough. It was only mildly bad. It didn't reach the mark. It never made it to "so bad it's awesome" status. It got stuck partway on "just plain bad" status and stayed there. It made me cry to watch such a mildly bad horror movie. In a manly way, of course. It did not join Attack of the Killer Tomatoes as an awesomely bad horror film.

Just take your seven bucks and use it to rent a movie or two. Rent Army of Darkness and watch Bruce Campbell kick undead ass. Just don't see Snakes on a Plane for your sake. You will be sad. You will cry. You will attempt to commit suicide, but more than likely fail, leaving you to just write a review on the web warning people to not see it. So take my advice: Don't see Snakes on a Plane.

It's too late for the idea to be saved. Snakes on a Plane is dead to me. I'm going to cry. In a manly way.