As I lay here
closing my eyes
hoping to sleep my
days away
I think about my life
things gained lost and wasted
my life cut and pasted
I wonder why am I here?
Why have I waited so long
to end my pain hurt and desperation
all alone in this life
to sit and ponder what will i do next
I often feel nothing
no emotion tears or cares
given up what might be
for one second to feel like me
I hate the noises
in my head they never stop
thoughts confusing
and hard to express
I try to help I really do
but none thank me
or very few
I have feelings and emotions too
I often wonder
what it would feel like to fly
away from everything
way up high
Among the treetops
gliding instead of fighting
to spread my wings
to feel free
away from life and misery
I want to let go
from the grip people have on me
to fall, to glide, to fly
to not have to try
leave me alone
hang up the phone
let me go
to fall below
Through my life so far
I have learnt many things
In particular how much life can change
That just because you make the wrong choices doesnt mean your life is over
just means you are taking the longer way round
I have learnt that
If you really want something you can make it happen but not always the way you expected
I have learnt that there is no such thing as normal that everyone is normal to their own standards
I have learnt that having no hope doesnt mean there isnt any
I have learnt that trust takes years to build
yet only seconds to destroy
I have learnt that there arent justbad people in this world that there are also good people too
I would have to say that out of all the things i have learnt in my life Love is the only thing that lasts forever.
Some days I get so weary
I want to lay my burdens down
when carings such a struggle
when friends dont call around
but then I hear an echo from the silence of my mind if you want to walk two steps ahead i'v got to walk two steps behind
When you're all worn down
down with worry
when you regretthe wasted years
when you think you're going nowhere
with your hopes dreams and fears
remember there are options
when you're scared and running blind
If I choose to walk two steps ahead
I leave you two steps behind
But with commonsense and caring
through hearts without disguise
we can reach an understanding
touch the dreams behind our eyes
share the tears and share the laughter
share the secrets in our minds
if we walk beside each other
none need to walk two steps behind
What am I scared of
What am I concealing
why wont I tell
why am i hurting
what do i do
no one wants to listen
why is this so
why do people hate me
what have i done
I guess I will never know
In a world without love
when I needed you most
you gave me hugs
when I fell apart
When I needed you here
you always came
when I fell
you caught me
I want to always have
a special place in your heart
i know you always will in mine
All things come to an end
and so do i
but always remember
me in death as in life
waiting to see
what this life
will bring to me
I've felt pain
I've felt sorrow
wondering if it will be
different tomorrow
Days are long
Hours longer
time goes so slowly
Sometimes I cry
but never heard
sometimes I even scream
I am changing
Its a part of growing up
but can i control what i want to be
I am
and all the elements that make me
you see
I am not want i want to be
but can i change
or will it be the same tomorrow