Kerry Record Fundraising $teals Resources From Poor, Homeless, Children

By Matt Forge

Washington (FP) -- While some liberals are applauding presumed possible Democratic presidential candidate hopeful John F. Kerry raising a record $100 million from March through May, lifting his presidential campaign to more than $140 million so far, other liberals are lamenting this very fact.

In these same months, donations to homeless shelters, soup kitchens and inner-city youth centers have dropped dramatically. "I blame Bush," said a Democrat who asked that his/her identity remain confidential. "Kerry has to keep pace with him by soliciting more and more money from donors - our donors."

It appears that liberals are focusing and concentrating all of their giving to the multi-millionaire senator to defeat Bush while neglecting the downtrodden among us. As Kerry criss-crosses high above the nation in his campaign jumbo jet, the poor are becoming poorer and the homeless are becoming even more homeless.

"We've all got sacrifices to make," responded Kerry to the revelation. "I know it hurts now, but if I have any chance of beating Bush then those people you just mentioned will have to do with a little less until I become the president. Then I'll tax the rich to make it up to them. That's been the Democratic way for as long as I can remember. It'll all be worth it - trust me."

Kerry: "We've all got sacrifices to make."