This is the first E-mail I received about Earwigs. It's from my not so understanding wife.
This is the second E-mail I received. It's from my heartless sister-in-law Jen.
(parental guidance is suggested)
EARWIGS ARE OBNOXIOUS, FILTHY, AND ANNOYING.
They are the menace - they destroy flowers and plants, carrying viruses and disease.
EARWIGS ARE EVIL CREATURES.
They are always lurking in the dark. They only emerge at night to spread mass destruction. The earwigs I encounter never eat anything beneficially. They target my most prized flowers and eat them right off the plants. As if this wasn't bad enough, they then burrow into the soil and go after the root of the plant, cutting of its life. How can you see these pests as anything positive? They certainly don't make this world a better place.
EARWIGS ARE PERVERTED LITTLE CREATURES.
This has been proven time and time again at our house as they sneak into the shower and try to join you. However, I am bigger and stronger. They are no match for a powerful stream of water which washes them to their watery grave. (Smothering them in shampoo also works & inflicts more pain)
I do have to give them one thing, the crunching, squashing noise they make when you step on them is music to my ears. HA HA HA!
Entry number three comes from more of my relatives, my nephews, Travis and Adam.
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