(YF1a) parental and other advice

This folder is dedicated to parents, the world's best teachers. As of this date 05-11-09, this folder contains 14 items. ******************************************************************************************************************* ******* item 1 PARENTS REJECT "IT'S OKAY TO BE GAY" CURRICULUM ******* item 2 UGANDA'S ABSTINENCE EDUCATION REDUCES NATIONAL AIDS RATE FROM 20% TO 5% ******* item 3 THE FRAUD OF MULTICULTURALISM ******* item 4 WE THE PEOPLE ******* item 5 BOOK FOR PARENTS OF GAY CHILDREN ******* item 6 TALK TO YOUR OHIO STATE, OHIO UNIVERSITY AND OTHER COLLEGE STUDENTS ALSO ******* item 7 SUPPORT OF GAYS PUSHED IN SCHOOLS ******* item 8 PUBLIC SCHOOL BIAS ******* item 9 ONLINE DISCUSSION GROUP ******* item 10 A GOOD MENTOR ******* item 11 KINDERGARTEN FATHER ARRESTED IN MASSACHUSETTS OVER OBJECTIONS TO HOMOSEXUAL CURRICULUM ******* item 12 SUPPORT FOR SOUTHERN BAPTIST CONVENTION RESOLUTION CONTINUES TO GROW ******* item 13 SAME SEX ATTRACTION AND MENTAL HEALTH ******* item 14 INTERVIEW WITH A PARENTS' RIGHTS ACTIVIST: BRIAN CAMENKER ******************************************************************************************************************* item 1 PARENTS REJECT "IT'S OKAY TO BE GAY" CURRICULUM ******* Medical evidence supports parents' concerns ******* CAMBRIDGE, Mass., February 24, 2003 (LifeSiteNews.com) - A new Zogby poll of 1,200 parents shows that 71% of parents do not want sex education programs teaching students that homosexual relationships are as normal and acceptable as loving heterosexual relationships, WorldNetDaily reports. ******* The study reinforces evidence of serious health risks accompanying homosexuality. A Harvard Medical School study of 4,000 high school students found that "gay-lesbian-bisexual youth report disproportionate risk for a variety of health risk and problem behaviors [including] twice the mean number of risk behaviors as did the overall population." ******* The results, published in the Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry (1999, vol. 38, pp. 297-304), also show that homosexual practice is associated with "significantly increased health risks [in]mental health, sexual risk-taking, and general health risks" including increased use of cocaine and other drugs; a greater likelihood of tobacco, marijuana and cocaine use before age 13; and "sexual intercourse before 13 years of age, sexual intercourse with four or more partners and sexual contact against one's will." ******* For WorldNetDaily coverage: http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=31171 ********************************************************************************************************************** ******* item 2 UGANDA'S ABSTINENCE EDUCATION REDUCES NATIONAL AIDS RATE FROM 20% TO 5% ******* The London Free Press ******* Sunday, July 20, 2003 ******* By Rory Leishman ******* On July 8, 2003, President George W. Bush gave a remarkably eloquent address on Goree Island off the coast of Senegal. From a Dutch-built fortress on this site, an estimated 2 million African slaves were shipped to the Americas. ******* "Human beings were delivered and sorted, and weighed, and branded with the marks of commercial enterprises, and loaded as cargo on a voyage without return," Bush noted. "One of the largest migrations of history was also one of the greatest crimes of history." ******* It was not just the slaves who were degraded by this vile traffick. "Years of unpunished brutality and bullying and rape produced a dullness and hardness of conscience," Bush related. "Christian men and women became blind to the clearest commands of their faith and added hypocrisy to injustice." ******* Eventually, of course, the ruling spirit of the Bible won out. Inspired by the admonition of Paul to the Galatians that: "There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female: for you are all one in Christ Jesus," a host of devout Christians led by William Wilberforce eradicated slavery from Christendom in the 19th century. ******* Meanwhile, the Bible also had a transforming impact on the slaves. Bush recalled: "In America, enslaved Africans learned the story of the exodus from Egypt and set their own hearts on a promised land of freedom. Enslaved Africans discovered a suffering Saviour and found he was more like themselves than their masters. Enslaved Africans heard the ringing promises of the Declaration of Independence and asked the self-evident question, then why not me?" ******* Today, Christianity is rapidly expanding throughout sub-Saharan Africa. In Uganda, the impact has been especially striking. ******* Hundreds of thousands of Ugandans were slaughtered during the 1970s and 1980s, first by the anti-Christian dictator Idi Amin and then by his brutal successor, the socialist Milton Obote. The turmoil came to an end in 1986, when the current Ugandan President Yoweri Museveni seized power in a military coup. ******* Today, Museveni is universally esteemed as one of the most enlightened and compassionate leaders in Africa. Uganda, to be sure, is still not a full-fledged democracy. Yet it's one of the freest countries in Africa. In its latest assessment of Uganda, Freedom House reports that most independent observers believe Museveni enjoys majority support among the Ugandan people. ******* During a stopover in Kampala, Uganda, Bush paid particular tribute to Museveni's leadership in the fight against HIV/AIDS. "You have shown the world what is possible in terms of reducing infection rates," Bush said. "You have been honest and open about the AIDS pandemic, and therefore have led your people to seek prevention and treatment and help and love." ******* This accolade was well deserved. Museveni set out his policy on AIDS in a 1991 address. He explained: "I have been emphasizing a return to our time-tested cultural practices that emphasized fidelity and condemned premarital and extramarital sex." ******* This message might well have fallen on deaf ears, except that 33 per cent of Ugandans are Catholic, another 33 per cent Protestant and 16 per cent Muslim. Altogether, Ugandans have responded eagerly to their president's anti-AIDs leadership. According to United Nations data, while Botswana, Swaziland, Zimbabwe and Lesotho have catastrophic adult HIV infection rates of more than 30 per cent, Uganda has brought its level down to five per cent. ******* Janet Museveni, the wife of the president, has also played a leading role in Uganda's anti-Aids campaign. She is a devout Christian. And like her husband, she insists condoms are not the answer to AIDS. In an address to the United Nations last year, she observed: "The young person who has been trained to be disciplined will, in the final analysis, survive better than the one who has been instructed to wear a piece of rubber and continues with 'business as usual.' When we fail to teach our young that there are some moral absolutes and they must reckon with them or perish, then we do grievous harm to the future of the human race." ******* Someone should invite Janet Museveni on a speaking tour of Canada. There are all-too-many Canadians who stand desperately in need of her life- and soul-saving message of Christian truth. ******* Rory Leishman, 836 Wellington St., London, Ontario, Canada N6A 3S7, Home/Office Phone: 519-439-2676, Home Page: www.roryleishman.com *********************************************************************************************************************** ******* item 3 THE FRAUD OF MULTICULTURALISM ******* From: "Robert A Jason" Date: Fri, 12 March 2004 ******* Dear Friends: ******* Before digging into the illuminating article below, please keep in mind the following quotes from famous people below: ******* 1. Malcolm Muggeridge: "WE HAVE EDUCATED OURSELVES INTO IMBECILITY". ******* 2. Vladimir Lenin: "GIVE ME A CHILD FOR THE FIRST 5 YEARS OF HIS LIFE AND HE WILL BE MINE FOREVER" ******* 3. Abraham Lincoln: "THE PHILOSOPHY OF THE SCHOOLROOM IN ONE GENERATION WILL BE THE PHILOSOPHY OF GOVERNANCE IN THE NEXT". ******* By Debbie O'Hara ******* NewsWithViews.com ******* Without a doubt most people in this country would agree that the government schools are failing our children. The government's pat answer to the problem is always a lack of funds, but I hope to convince you that the true problem behind the failure of these schools is far more sinister than that. The real culprit is not a lack of money but the evil programs being advanced under the umbrella of a term called Multiculturalism, better known as diversity. ******* Unfortunately it looks as if most people have bought into the lack of funds argument that the government has set before us. They don't seem to have a problem digging ever deeper into their pockets and taking out their hard-earned cash when they hear that insatiable cry for more dollars. In fact in the recent March 2 election, my home state of California passed some bond measures that will give billions more to local schools. I personally find the money answer very hard to swallow after seeing the 2003 Condition of Education Report put out by the National Center for Education Statistics. ******* In 1991-92 the average annual U.S. cost to educate one child in the government schools was $6,729. By the 1999 -2000 school year the figure, adjusted for inflation, was $8,105. That is an over 20% increase in real dollars in less than 10 years. As we can see, even after spending exorbitant amounts of money on education, many of America's children are still graduating after 13 years of school basically illiterate. How can this be? How can schools be failing with so much money being invested in them? Is it possible that maybe the goals of the parents and the goals of government are not the same? Could it be that in the eyes of government the schools aren't failing at all but are actually reaching their hidden objectives? ******* The government objectives appear to be very light in the area of academics and heavy on brainwashing into what is termed multiculturalism or diversity. Many people probably wonder what could be wrong with that? Our children need to learn about other cultures, don't they? Certainly we should agree that learning about other cultures is important. But those who set the curriculum are not talking about learning the cultures of other peoples of the world like that of India, China, Japan and so forth. Multiculturalism is a euphemism for the myth of diversity. We have campuses full of people who look different but are programmed to think alike. While the multiculturalism being promoted in schools doesn't appear to have a clear definition, we can see a vast array of causes that are advanced under its name - AIDS awareness, homosexuality, radical feminism, sexual harassment, etc. Even teachers at the elementary grades and junior high level have been taught to give a watered-down multicultural curriculum to their students. ******* While we are told that our children are getting a values-free education because all cultures are being treated equally, we know that statement is not true because the traditional values of the West are condemned. The diversity promoting Multiculturalists have eliminated traditional male-female distinctions and tell us that sexual restraints have got to go. Our children are taught that morality is oppressive because it doesn't take into account the "alternative lifestyles" of "minorities". How can an educational system that promotes homosexuality be considered values-free? No major religion condones homosexuality. America's children are being taught values in the name of diversity that many parents spend 18 years trying to make sure that their children don't absorb. ******* A multicultural curriculum puts more emphasis on making students feel good than on academics. The teachers are not interested in facts but only on how their students feel. Teachers would never think of discussing the warlike nature of the Apaches that included ritual torture. In fact if a student was to bring up the truth, he would be considered intolerant. Teaching myth instead of fact is very important in teaching multiculture because if the real history books of non-Western cultures were being read, these other cultures would lose much of their attractiveness. To make sure that the truth is shouted down, Multiculturalism has given us "political correctness". Everybody better watch their speech or they may end up in a lawsuit. Since multiculturalism cannot be supported rationally, speech has to be suppressed to prevent people from challenging its fundamental premises. Neutrality is a pretense because we have really replaced the old values of Western civilization based on Judeo-Christian principles with a new set of values. All cultures are spoken of in a positive light except for Western culture because it believes in transcultural truth and that is the one thing that cannot be tolerated. In rejecting the values of the West, Multiculturalists obviously cannot say that they do not believe in value judgment. ******* Multiculturalism itself has become the new culture. It is a culture of blame instead of individual responsibility where the emphasis is on victims and victimhood. Dysfunction is the new standard and it appears that victims can do no wrong. We had the Menendez brothers who admitted killing their parents, but were not convicted because the jury heard they had been abused. A $2.9 million judgment against McDonalds was awarded to a woman who suffered burns when she spilled a cup of coffee that she was holding between her legs in a moving car. What insanity! ******* Multiculturalism is also a culture of radicalizing differences. Instead of uniting the American people by teaching what it means to be an American we celebrate our "differences". The local government schools in my area promote slogans like "Celebrating our Differences" and "Unity in Diversity", but I don't see unity; I see divisiveness. I thought segregation was supposed to be a bad thing, but you can go to almost any campus in America and you will find students that are celebrating their differences by choosing to segregate themselves into special clubs by race, gender or sexual preference. I hear of harassment going on at the local high school for those who don't wish to join these clubs. ******* Chronic malcontents are also bred by Multiculturalism. There is no pride instilled in these students about being American. Instead their new-found identities are based on their "victim" groups which are in search of oppressors. Oppression is the backbone of their identity; so much like a witch-hunt, oppressors must be found or their status of victimhood, and therefore their identiy, would be lost. Multiculture is causing horrendous dissension between the races, genders and among family members. More often than not the real victims are those who are singled out for reprisal through no fault of their own. These people are not morally flawed - just unlucky. No one is safe from this witch-hunt because there are not really any rules you can teach someone to tell him or her how to not give offense. Every individual acts in unpredictable ways so many people feel it is best to stick with their own group because it is not worth the trouble that you might offend someone of another group. So much for the myth of unity. Instead of the utopia promised under Multiculturalism, I think we have found ourselves back under the Medieval Inquisition. ******* Multiculturalism is a long chain of victimization and revenge that favors only certain sub-groups of people. One example is that of a growing number of American Blacks calling for reparations for slavery. Never mind that there are no American Blacks alive that were ever slaves or American Whites that were slave owners. Truth and justice are not the goal. The goal appears to be gaining preferred dominant status at the expense of others. Only a particular race, gender, sexual preference, etc. that shares the same "politically correct" ideology as the multiculturalist elites gets that special dominant status. How can multiculture possibly be thought superior to the religious tradition of the West that brought forgiveness, redemption and salvation for all classes of people? ******* Multiculturalism has caused the deconstruction of all meaning in a child's education. The West's quest for universal truth has been replaced by the emptiness of Multiculturalism. There is no framework on which our children can decide what is important and what is trivial. Without truth only the latest fads become the basis of instruction. We have a generation of children searching for meaning in what appears to be a meaningless world. Even if they don't believe in the Multicultural garbage they are being taught, they still do not have the basic tools they need to search for truth and meaning in their lives. The most important years of America's brightest children are being wasted. ******* Why are America's children being dumbed down and robbed of a real education? Why are they being taught to vie for victim status and to somehow think someone else owes them a living? Because the true objective of our Multicultural masters that run the government schools is to make good little socialists out of our children. And that is what socialists do - live at the expense of others. The purpose of the multicultural movement is to radically alter our entire culture so as to dumb down our children in order to make a One World Socialist Government acceptable to them. The intent is to wipe away all borders and to destroy nationhood. Their plans are working out well. We can see our current President, George W. Bush, carrying out his border destroying plans; following right along the same path as the last two administrations. And barely a peep from the American people! I hear the same deafening silence when Supreme Court Justices, the likes of Sandra Day O'Connor, talk about the importance of taking international law into consideration when making decisions that affect our country. Good by American Constitution. Good by American liberty. People groups are so angry with each other that they don't realize who the real oppressors are. ******* It is still possible for people to learn the truth, but they will have to do it on their own. The reason that God put parents in charge of their children's education should now be obvious and we need to take that role back. We face a tough battle because we are in the second generation of Multiculturalism. Many parents are as clueless as their children are about what is going on in our schools and in our country as a whole. I didn't have a clue myself until around ten years ago when I learned right along with my own children while homeschooling. ******* There is no doubt in my mind that the future of this country is in the hands of parents who care enough about their children's futures to make whatever sacrifices are necessary in order to give them a proper education. Children need to be taught the truth because their freedom depends on it. Someday their very lives may depend on it. Socialism was responsible for the deaths of tens of millions of hapless victims in the 20th century alone. ******* There is no space for the individual in this new multicultural political order. We need to get back to teaching our children the responsibility they have as individuals before God because the very cornerstone of civilization, as He created it, is based on the concept of the individual, with rights that transcend any particular cultural system. ******* © 2004 Debbie O'Hara - All Rights Reserved ******* Sign Up For Free E-Mail Alerts ******* Finally, Easy and Affordable Health Insurance -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Debbie O'Hara is a homemaker, wife and mother of eight children. During her business career she held a position in management in the aerospace industry in Southern California. She left the business world to become a full time mother. She is an avid reader, and did the necessary research to provide a comprehensive homeschool curriculum for her children. This led her to closely examine the political direction our country has been following. Debbie and her children are now active in the political process both locally and nationally. ******* Debbie is a contributing writer to www.NewsWithViews.com. ******* E-Mail: ohara9@cox.net ********************************************************************************************************************** ******* item 4 WE THE PEOPLE ******* From: "PFOX" ******* Date: Mon, 26 Jul 2004 ******* We The People http://www.exodus.to/news_2004_0702.shtml ******* By Nancy Brown of LifeGuard Ministries ******* I believe that public school systems that allow pro gay presentations in their schools without rebuttal by ex-gays or Christians are violating the civil rights laws of this country. In the name of separation of church and state, my straight children are not allowed to proclaim their orientation or faith based moral decisions but gay students are. I pay taxes to support the schools but my beliefs on gay issues are denied and ignored and misinformation on the subject is presented with funds I provide. That is discrimination and takes democracy back to the original atrocity that started our revolution from England: taxation without representation. ******* Unless I can afford private schooling I have no choice but to place my children in the public school system. I am required by law to do so. School systems are supported by tax dollars. Dollars taken from taxes paid on property owned by individuals. Taxes, which I am required by law to pay. In my community those over 65 do not pay property taxes so that means those with school age children bear the burden of paying for the schools needs. The government subsidizes school systems. However, since the government is supposed to be "for the people" and since I am one of the "people" who pays taxes any money the government sends actually comes from me as well. So why does the government get to decide who gets heard and who is silenced on moral issues? Has the government now become an entity unto itself? ******* As things stand now, I do not get to choose what goes into the textbooks my children read. These textbooks usually list pro gay resources for students who are confused about their sexuality, but not ex-gay or Christian resources as well. I do not get a voice in what is spoken or taught in health classes concerning homosexuality. The only review of statistics concerning homosexuality provided to youth in these courses or textbooks is completely biased. Statistics such as the percentage of homosexuals in the populace, the myth that homosexuality is a genetic trait, the representation of those youth with suppressed same sex attractions as having a high percentage of suicides: all of these politically motivated claims lack rigorous critical review. I have found these statistics to be blatant lies or at least greatly exaggerated. ******* PFOX -- Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays & Gays, Box 561, Fort Belvoir VA 22060, 703-360-2225, pfox_exgays@hotmail.com, www.pfox.org ******* To subscribe to this list, send a blank email to: PFOX-subscribe@topica.com ******************************************************************************************************************** ******* item 5 BOOK FOR PARENTS OF GAY CHILDREN ******* From: "PFOX" ******* Date: Fri, 22 Oct 2004 21:43:36 +0000 ******* The book Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan For Family Healing by ex-gay therapist Richard Cohen provides a 21-Step Treatment Plan for parents whose children experience same-sex attraction (SSA). The book is especially geared toward those children who have embraced a "gay" identity; however, it is also beneficial for those who choose to change and come out straight. ******* If you yourself experience unwanted SSA and wish to change, this is a perfect gift for your parents, mentors and/or loved ones. It will teach them how they may better understand you and more specifically, what you need in order to heal. Together you may work through the steps and exercises, thus creating a more intimate and loving relationship. ******* If you know someone who has a child who experiences SSA, this is an excellent book to give them. Instead of just embracing their child and his or her homosexuality, they will find alternatives to promote lasting change. It is also an excellent tool for clergy, therapists, or anyone working with family members whose loved one has same-sex attraction. ******* If you have children who are living the "gay" lifestyle, or experimenting with it, this book is for you. It will provide you with valuable insights into your children ¨C how they think, why they think the way they do, and most of all, what you can do to help them and the entire family heal. ******* The treatment plan is summarized in six stages: 1) Educate yourself about the causes of SSA; 2) Educate yourself about the homosexual movement and what your child has learned; 3) Realize that you are now entering his or her world; 4) Learn more about your child, this is a battle of love; 5) Establish trust, do things together; and 6) Seek professional help, attend seminars, and participate in family healing sessions. ******* The 21-Step Treatment Plan is all about understanding SSA and then creating secure attachment between parents, siblings, relatives and the child who experiences same-sex attraction. All homosexual feelings are based upon: 1) childhood wounds that have not healed, and 2) unmet needs for love and acceptance. That's it. If one focuses on those two things, then radical healing and transformation will occur. This plan is all about creating an environment of BELONGING within the family system. It's about bonding with ones same-sex parent, same-sex siblings, same-sex relatives and same-sex peers: the more bonding the better. It's also about healing relationships with the opposite sex parent and perhaps others of the opposite sex. ******* THIS IS A BATTLE OF LOVE. Whoever loves the most and longest, wins! It's either going to be the homosexual community or the family. The choice is yours. The choice is ours. If we work together to bring greater understanding in our communities, then will certainly create a more loving environment where our children may heal and grow into the fullness of their true gender identity. We must spread the truth that: No one is born with SSA and change is possible. We need to fight for the lives of those who experience SSA. We cannot "fix" them, we can only love them to life. And in the process, we too will be healed and transformed. ******* BOOK FOREWORD EXCERPTS BY ARTHUR GOLDBERG: ******* The book Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan For Family Healing fills a void. The literature concerning same-sex attraction (SSA) is generally geared either toward the individual struggling to heal from homosexuality, or to therapists who assist individuals seeking change. Almost nothing has been targeted to parents who potentially have the greatest influence on whether their child will experience SSA or not. Neither has much been written about what, if anything, parents can do to reverse those feelings and actions. This book sets forth teachings for parents to reorient their family structure and help their child resume his/her journey into a mature gender identity. ******* Richard Cohen's book, Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan For Family Healing, clearly addresses the walls of detachment that the individual struggling with SSA erected as a child in their effort to protect his/her vulnerable self from emotional pain. Understanding that these seeds of homosexuality began in family relationships, Richard lays out a treatment plan to re-establish healthy family dynamics. He emphasizes that it is never too late for someone to change from gay to straight. However, to do so, Richard explains how the process of reattachment can and needs to take place. ******* Thus, it is with gratitude to Richard for filling so many voids in the world of healing same-sex attraction, and for his continuing leadership and distinctive insights, that I highly recommend this long awaited text. ******* Arthur Goldberg Co-Director, JONAH (Jews Offering New Alternatives to Homosexuality) at www.jonahweb.org ******* BOOK FOREWORD EXCERPTS BY REGINA GRIGGS: ******* Richard Cohen's new book, Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan For Family Healing, is easy to read and follow. He provides you with a step-by-step program to implement, and offers simple tools to help you and your child heal. This book encourages parents and families to grow closer, and gives us permission to have a life outside of our child's struggles with same sex attraction. ******* Seven years ago, when I found out that my son was struggling with homosexuality, I felt completely alone and believed I was a failure as mom. There was no place for me to turn for help and information. All I could find were gay affirming literature and organizations. I visited numerous bookstores and went to local libraries. All the information was pro-homosexual, but nothing about how to overcome SSA or how to reach out to your child without affirming his or her homosexuality. ******* I ordered PFLAG's (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) booklets and information, but there was nothing about how one develops SSA. After reading pro-homosexual information and the possibility of a gay gene, it became clear to me that no one was dealing with the real issue, that homosexuality is about feelings, not genetics. The pro-homosexual culture had no interest or concern in helping my child or my family to understand how to overcome same-sex attraction. Instead, they encouraged all of us to embrace, approve of and advocate for them. ******* I knew I was not alone. I knew there must be thousands of parents and families like mine in need of support, whose lives had been affected by a loved one's SSA. I became involved in developing PFOX (Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays and Gays) into a national organization in order to help keep families together through unconditional love and mutual respect. PFOX has developed an online support group and local chapters so that no one needs to feel alone. ******* We all want the best for our children. Please read, Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan For Family Healing, and follow Richard's suggestions for building a healthy parent-child relationship, one based on unconditional love and mutual respect. We can only change the heart and mind of those we love by taking the risk of sharing our feelings, and working diligently toward building a more solid, loving relationship. What started in the family must be healed in the family. ******* Regina Griggs, National Director, PFOX (Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays and Gays) at www.pfox.org ******* NEW BOOK RELEASE ******* Gay Children, Straight Parents: A Plan For Family Healing ******* A 21-Step Treatment Plan for family members whose loved ones experience same-sex attraction (SSA). The solution to healing SSA is love and understanding. The goal of this treatment plan is to create intimacy and secure attachment between parents and children. By using these practical tools and skills, lasting change can and will occur. It works if you work it! ******* Perfect for parents with children who experience SSA, perfect for SSA strugglers who wish to teach their family members and mentors, perfect for therapists / clergy assisting family members, perfect gift for those whose loved ones are dealing with SSA ******* Now available for sale at www.comingoutstraight.com (Resource Materials page) or call the IHF office at (301) 805-6111 to order a copy. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - To subscribe to this list of ex-gay news and views, send a blank email to: PFOX-subscribe@topica.com ******************************************************************************************************************* ******* item 6 TALK TO YOUR OHIO STATE, OHIO UNIVERSITY AND OTHER COLLEGE STUDENTS ALSO ******* Date: Fri, 29 Oct 2004 ******* From: "Mission America" ******* A wise reader just reminded me that we should also ask parents and grandparents of students who attend Ohio State to have a "teaching moment" about Issue One, and the issue of homosexuality. The president of OSU has been an outspoken opponent of traditional marriage. ******* Ditto for students who attend other Ohio colleges and other colleges across this country. I am regularly pelted with e-mails from young people who are very badly informed on this subject and have bought the "civil rights" platform hook, line and sinker. If you ask your student the questions below, and you find he/she has a pro-homosexual viewpoint, it is highly likely that the student has doubts about his/her Christian faith as well.They go hand in hand. ******* Here is an outline of what you might address with them (again, consult our web site at www.missionamerica.com and the Links on that page, for resources): ******* 1. Do you believe homosexuality is inborn? (No evidence of this) ******* 2. Do you believe the behaviors involved in homosexuality involve no greater risks than heterosexuality? ******* 3. Do you believe sex should be confined to a marriage between one man and one woman? ******* 4. Do you believe that God created each of us? ******* 5. Is it a "hate crime" to object to homosexuality? ******* 6. Do young people have the right to hear about people who have left the homosexual lifestyle? ******* 7.Should school children be required to have a positive viewpoint about homosexuality? ******* Godspeed in your discussions. Please consult our website --there are lots of ideas, facts and resources there. ******* Linda Harvey ------------------------ Mail service for Mission America provided by American Family Online www.afo.net ******* Mission America www.missionamerica.com ******************************************************************************************************************* ******* item 7 SUPPORT OF GAYS PUSHED IN SCHOOLS ******* Date: Fri, 3 Dec 2004 ******* From: "Mission America" ******* By George Archibald, The Washington Times, Wed., Dec. 1, 2004, Page A3 http://www.washtimes.com/national/20041130-102740-4303r.htm ******* Civil liberties and homosexual rights advocates have renewed their push for community programs to bolster support in schools for homosexual youths, just weeks after voters repudiated same-sex unions in 11 state referendums. But in northeastern Kentucky, parents and students have defied the Ashland-Boyd County school district's "mandatory anti-harassment workshops," part of an agreement with the American Civil Liberties Union to allow the Gay-Straight Alliances student group to meet in school buildings. Hundreds of students opted out of the tolerance training video, and another 324 students did not show up for school the day it was shown. The ACLU has threatened to file for a court order to enforce attendance. ******* Joseph Platt, a Cincinnati lawyer representing parents, said "mandatory training on tolerance for homosexuals violates the right of conscience of parents and students who believe such behavior immoral." In Charlotte-Mecklenburg County, N.C., a lengthy cover feature in Charlotte Parent, a widely circulated shopper magazine, has brought indignant protests from churches and private schools associated with the Greater Charlotte Association of Christian Schools. Titled "Parenting a Gay Child," the feature offered a sympathetic account of youngsters with "same-sex attraction" and advocated community "support services and education" on behalf of homosexual children. The article supported the view of homosexual interest groups that same-sex unions are comparable to heterosexual marriage. ******* Van Wade, president of Christian schools association and headmaster of Carmel Christian School in Charlotte, said, "The article was very one-sided and accommodating" toward homosexuality. "No one ever said, 'Let's talk about the moral issues that are involved.' " Mr. Wade said the 55,000-circulation magazine should have given alternatives to support parents "who want to help children live godly lives and pursue sexual abstinence." The feature listed only names, addresses, telephone numbers and Web sites of a half-dozen pro-homosexual support groups. ******* Thomas K. Crowe, executive pastor of Charlotte's First Baptist Church, told the magazine in a letter he provided to The Washington Times that he believed sexual preference is "an unhealthy choice/preference.. that can be corrected. There are organizations and helpers available to teens and adults to live healthy lives in tune with God's plan for men and women." ******* Charlotte Parent is distributed free of charge at 800 locations. Christian leaders have said they would withdraw their advertising and ask that the magazine not be delivered again. Church criticism was not unanimous. David Hains, spokesman for the Catholic Diocese of Charlotte, told the Charlotte World that the diocese "doesn't find the article objectionable." ******* Karen E. Conroy, the magazine's editor and author of the feature, declined to comment but said she would address criticisms in the December issue. ******* William J. Maier, vice president and psychologist in residence for Focus on the Family in Boulder, Colo., said, "There is no proof that homosexuals are 'born gay' or that homosexuality is a 'fixed,' unchangeable condition," according to the American Psychiatric Association. "No child is 'born gay'; the notion is scientifically absurd." ******* Ron Schlittler, executive director of Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, said such positions perpetuate "baseless fears and misguided claims about [homosexuals], such as the tired notion that they must 'recruit.' " Such fears are "exploited by those who wish to portray our family members and friends as some sort of danger." ******* Charlotte-Mecklenburg public schools do not permit counselors to discuss sexuality with their students. Also, groups that encourage and support youths who embrace homosexuality are prohibited from advertising their activities on school property. As a result, three years ago one such group, Time Out Youth, listed by Charlotte Parent, started a "We Are Your Gay Youth" billboard campaign along busy Charlotte streets with contact details for further information. ******* Copyright © 2004 News World Communications, Inc. All rights reserved. ******* Mail service for Mission America provided by American Family Online www.afo.net ******* Mission America, www.missionamerica.com *********************************************************************************************************************** ******* item 8 PUBLIC SCHOOL BIAS ******* Date: Wed, 8 Dec 2004 ******* Public Schools Often Use Sex-Ed to Promote Bias Agendas Regarding Homosexuality New Report Available to Counter Abuses and Misinformation Regarding Homosexuality ******* News Advisory for Dec. 7 /Christian Wire Service/ --Health education has become a battleground in many locations due to the inclusion of sexuality education within the overall mission of health education. Sexuality education in any context is controversial. Issues of parental control, educator responsibility, morality, and health consequences for students all converge to make consensus difficult. ******* Numerous school districts have included various types of sexuality education in their health curricula. In recent years, advocates for students who experience same sex attraction have had significant impact in the schools. Many who are generally considered gay activists believe schools should discuss sexual variations. Some groups, such as those involved in the Gay Lesbian Straight Educators Network believe such teaching should begin in kindergarten and proceed through graduation. ******* How should health education be approached in relation to the problems of disease and pregnancy prevention? How should sexual variations be discussed in the middle school and high school classrooms, if at all? These questions demand serious attention from parents and educators. ******* This white paper, available online at http://www.drthrockmorton.com/montgomery.pdf, is a response to the effort of the Montgomery County Public Schools to address disease, pregnancy and confusion concerning personal sexuality via health education among middle school and high school aged students. While this report is directed toward the Montgomery County Public Schools, the research and conclusions are applicable across the country. ******* "If the sex-ed material used by many public schools were presented as part of a debate class it would be understood that it was just one point of view. But when schools use a biased approach to teach children about sexual behavior, children assume that this is scientific and balanced. ******* "Restricting children’s information to a biased point of view interferes with their full knowledge of what options are available to them in setting their life goals and managing their personal behavior to reach those goals. The constant refusal to abandon this bias demonstrates that some schools and school teachers hope to steer students toward a specific view of human sexuality. At this point the instructor is no longer educating, but rather participating in social advocacy." --Dr. Warren Throckmorton ******* Report is available online at: http://www.drthrockmorton.com/montgomery.pdf ******* Contact: Dr. Warren Throckmorton, (724) 458-3787, (724) 967-5644 cell, ewthrockmorton@gcc.edu ******* To subscribe to this list of ex-gay news and views, send a blank email to: PFOX-subscribe@topica.com *********************************************************************************************************************** ******* item 9 ONLINE DISCUSSION GROUP ******* Date: Tue, 21 Dec 2004 ******* From: "PFOX" ******* PFOX sponsors an e-mail discussion group at Yahoo Groups. It is comprised of parents and spouses of strugglers, and we also have ex-gays on the list. We support each other daily via e-mail. You can just read the postings or join in the discussion at any time with your particular day to day hopes and struggles. ******* If you would like to join send a blank e-mail to: ex-gay-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ******* To subscribe to this list of ex-gay news and views, send a blank email to: PFOX-subscribe@topica.com ********************************************************************************************************************* ******* item 10 A GOOD MENTOR ******* From: "PFOX" ******* Date: Tue, 28 Dec 2004 ******* THE CHARACTERISTICS OF A GOOD MENTOR ******* Men struggling with same sex attraction need good male mentors ******* by Steven Donaldson M.A. L.P.C. and Del Thornton, M.S.W. L.C.S.W. of Mosaic Counseling Associates, Portland Oregon ******* To be effective, a mentor must have several characteristics. No one can be the perfect embodiment of these characteristics. A good mentor must demonstrate self-confidence and good moral character. That is, he must have achieved a sense of masculine competence of his own. ******* A good mentor must have strong gender identity. That is, he must feel good about himself as a man. This does not mean being super macho. Being super macho is actually a sign of weak gender identification. Evidence of sound gender security includes the lack of defensiveness or the need to prove anything to anyone, and active participation in his masculine roles, e.g. father, husband, provider, ecclesiastical leader, male friendships, and male-typical activities. In addition, a male with good gender identification relate respectfully and well to women. He respects and likes women and it shows. In essence, he should enjoy every aspect of being a man. ******* A good mentor will have good ego-strength. What this means is that he does not get his feelings hurt easily and has no problem saying 'no." Mentoring can be very trying, and requires tenacity for the long haul. Same sex attraction (SSA) does not form overnight and even with motivated clients it does not go away overnight. The mentor's self-esteem cannot depend on the success of his mentee. He must remain positive, loving, and encouraging, no matter how badly his mentee fails. ******* Men who struggle with SSA can be at the same time emotionally needy and defensively detached. This means they long for emotional contact with men but fear being hurt. At the first sign of abandonment they can become defensive and even reactive which may be interpreted as condescendence. The mentor can never take the defensiveness personally and must be able to set limits on the emotional neediness. ******* A good mentor must be emotionally available. He must be comfortable with his own feelings and able to share these with the mentee. He must be comfortable with his own weaknesses, failures, embarrassments, and fears and be able to share these with the mentee at times when this type of disclosure would be helpful. He must be able to hear the mentee talk about his fears, anger, feelings of inadequacy, and pain without becoming anxious or needing to minimize or fix them. It is not the job of the mentor to know what the mentee should do or to fix them. This very important. The mentor's job is to be present over the long haul and emotionally supportive. The mentor is neither the mentee's moral authority or therapist and does not need to take responsibility for or direct him in these ways. Men who struggle with SSA badly need both spiritual direction and therapeutic help, but this not the role of the mentor. ******* While the mentor must be emotionally available, the mentor should not lean on the mentee for emotional support. The mentor relationship mirrors the relationship of a healthy father-son dynamic. In this dynamic, the father provides for the son but the son does not provide for the father. Fathers get their needs met in the adult world while children seek their emotional support from their parents. ******* A good mentor must be physically affectionate. Many people believe that being physically affectionate with men who struggle with SSA will exacerbate their symptoms. Nothing could be further from the truth. Men who struggle with SSA are afraid of male affection. It is precisely this fear that makes male affection so intensely sexually interesting. As long as the mentor has a strong gender identity, there is no chance of the encounter becoming sexual. This is exactly the kind of safety the mentee needs to experiment with allowing himself to genuinely love and need non-sexual male affection. The deepest longing of the man who struggles with SSA is not for sex. It is for love and affirmation. ******* Finally, a mentor must pursue the relationship with the mentee. The mentee at the core does not rust that the mentor could ever be genuinely interested in him and at the same time, need nothing from him. This is a continuation of the father-child injury. For this reason the mentee will not be the initiator in the relationship. This will be re-enacted in the mentoring relationship. In addition, when there is any confusion or conflict the mentee is very likely to assume he did something wrong and withdraw or devalue the relationship. The mentor is very likely to assume he did something wrong and withdraw or devalue the relationship. The mentor must remember that the withdrawal from or devaluing of the relationship is a defense (usually unconscious) against the intense need and longing for the love and affirmation of an idealized male. The mentor must not take anything personally and continue to gently but actively pursue the mentee. ******* Men who struggle with SSA long for a non-anxious connection with men. The mentor needs to take initiative in identifying activities that will be fun for both and yet not too anxiety provoking for the mentee. The mentor should explore common interest such as art, music, theater, cars, or sports. Both can introduce each other to the things they individually enjoy. Over time, the relationship will develop that will allow more risks to be taken with the fear of humiliation. ******* Some men who struggle with SSA have defensively detached from masculinity so extensively that almost any male-typical activity will trigger a fear/inadequacy response. In the beginning, even watching a basketball game may be too much. Defensive detachment seldom is expressed as fear. A mentee will probably never say, "I'm afraid of appearing stupid if I watch a game with you." They are much more likely to express disinterest such as, "I have never seen the point of football. It is nothing but egotistical male aggression.!!" The mentor must see through this defense and slowly encourage his mentee to be a part of the world of men. This can only happen over time and when trust is established. It is not necessary for all men who struggle with SSA to become NFL fans. They must however develop to the point that they can attend a Super Bowl party or a church softball game without feeling overwhelmed with anxiety and inadequacy. ******* Learning to play and be competitive at team sports may often be a problem for men who struggle with SSA. They should be encouraged to do so; however, this should be approached with extreme caution. Even encouragement in this area can trigger significant fear, which leads to compulsions to act out. This is often an area of significant childhood injury and avoidance is well established. It is typical for these men to gravitate toward individual sports such as track, swimming, diving, and ice-skating to avoid being a member of a team. They feel inadequate to perform in a situation where other men rely on them in competition. Even minor failures in a team sport can be experienced as devastating inadequacy and overwhelming humiliation. It may be wise to consult the mentee's therapist before approaching this issue. ******* It is important to include the mentee in your family events. Many men who struggle with SSA come from families with poor dynamics and so have a distorted view of family. ******* Encourage church-based activities, but go slowly. Church attendance can increase anxiety, which in turn can led to increased sexual compulsion. Seek feedback from your mentee. They know what they need. Be open to their suggestions and trust them. If at any point you hurt or disappoint your mentee, sincerely apologize without making excuses. It may be their first experience of humility from an authority figure. This can be very healing. ******* Use their talents. Never evaluate their talents in terms of the masculinity of the activity. All men are created by God, completely masculine. Their preferences, talents, and feelings are completely masculine. Everything about them is completely masculine. The thing men who struggle with SSA lack is an internalized sense (feeling) of masculine adequacy. There is no objective thing that he is lacking. The last thing they need is to have a man they respect infer, even indirectly, that they are in some way less than completely male. ******* Copyright by Steven Donaldson M.A. L.P.C. and Del Thornton, M.S.W. L.C.S.W. of Mosaic Counseling Associates, Portland Oregon - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - To subscribe to this list of ex-gay news and views, send a blank email to: PFOX-subscribe@topica.com ********************************************************************************************************************** ******* item 11 KINDERGARTEN FATHER ARRESTED IN MASSACHUSETTS OVER OBJECTIONS TO HOMOSEXUAL CURRICULUM ******* Date: Thu, 28 Apr 2005 ******* From: "Mission America" ******* Lexington, Mass., father of 6-year-old arrested and taken to jail over objections to homosexual curriculum in son’s kindergarten class. ******* Demanded that school inform him and allow child to opt-out; superintendent refused. ******* LEXINGTON, MASSACHUSETTS, APRIL 27. Lexington parent, David Parker, was arrested today by the Lexington Police for “trespassing” at his son’s elementary school during a scheduled meeting with the principal and the city’s Director of Education over his objections to homosexual curriculum materials and discussions in his son’s kindergarten class. ******* At the meeting, Parker demanded that the school inform him when homosexual subjects are to be discussed with his son, and allow his son not to be included in such activities. He said he would not leave until his request was granted. The Principal and the city’s Director of Education both refused his request. They then telephoned the Superintendent of Schools who also refused. Police were called, who told Parker that unless he left the school he would be arrested. ******* Statement by David Parker(April 27, 2005): “I, David Parker, am the father of a kindergarten student at Estabrook Elementary School in Lexington, Massachusetts. Since the beginning of this school year, my wife and I have learned that school materials and discussions about gay-headed households/same-sex union issues have been exposed to the children. There are definitive plans to increase the teacher/staff/adult mediated discussions of these subjects. ******* “We have officially stated on many occasions—to the Lexington school administration—a request that we be notified when these discussions are planned, and want our 6-year-old opted out of such situations when arising “spontaneously”. ******* “Our parental requests for our own child were flat-out denied with no effort at accommodation. In our meeting on April 27, I, insisted that such accommodation be made and refused to leave the meeting room. I was informed that I would be arrested.” ******* Parker will be arraigned on Thursday, April 28, in Concord District Court at 9 am. “This is an unbelievable outrage,” said Brian Camenker, a friend and Newton, Mass. parent. “It’s where last year’s same-sex ‘marriage’ ruling has brought us.” ******* For more background information, see www.Article8.org. ******* Contact: Brian Camenker, Article 8 Alliance 781-899-4905 ----------------------------- Mail service for Mission America provided by American Family Online www.afo.net ******* Mission America www.missionamerica.com ********************************************************************************************************************* ******* item 12 SUPPORT FOR SOUTHERN BAPTIST CONVENTION RESOLUTION CONTINUES TO GROW ******* From: American Family Association of Pennsylvania www.afaofpa.org via Mission America and Robert A. Jason Sent: Friday, June 17, 2005 ******* CONTACT: Diane Gramley 1.814.437.5355 or 1.814.271.9078 ******* (Washington, D.C.) -- Support for the Southern Baptist Convention "Resolution on Homosexuality in Public Schools" continues to grow. The initial letter to Dr. Gene Mims had the names of almost fifty Christian and pro-family groups. The list of organizations which support the resolution has grown to 58 with an addition of sixteen organizations since June 14. ******* "These grass roots leaders are concerned about what is happening to our children in the public school setting -- how homosexual activists are using the schools as an avenue to desensitize our kids and normalize this abhorrent behavior. The overwhelming support has been phenomenal and I am very grateful to be able to work with such a great group of concerned grassroots leaders in this effort to protect our most precious legacy, our children," Diane Gramley, president of the American Family Association of Pennsylvania and one of the original signatories on the letter to Dr. Mims said today. ******* The increase in support now involves the leadership of ten state affiliates of the American Family Association, eleven state affiliates of Concerned Women for America, eight state affiliates of Eagle Forum, sixteen state affiliates of Focus on the Family, home education groups (including the Southern Baptist Church and Home Education Association) and other independent statewide pro-family groups. ******* E. Ray Moore, Director of Exodus Mandate, remarked, "We are deeply grateful to Diane Gramley for her efforts to recruit and rally pro-family and Christian organizations in support of the resolution to investigate homosexuality in public schools co-sponsored by Drs. Voddie Baucham and Bruce Shortt. This wide spread support shows that there is a rising tide of concern about homosexuality in our public schools and growing support for Christian schools and homeschooling." ******* The new signatories are as follows: ******* Kevin McCoy, Executive Director West Virginia Family Foundation, Inc. ******* Tammy Bellinger, State Director Concerned Women for America of Arizona ******* Jane Carron, State Director Concerned Women for America of Florida ******* Kathy Valente, State Director Concerned Women for America of Illinois ******* Tammy Mosher, State Director Concerned Women for America of Massachusetts ******* Pat Hanson, Director Concerned Women For America, Texas-South ******* Orlean Koehle, State President Eagle Forum of California ******* Violet Vestevich, President Eagle Forum of Michigan ******* Fran Bevan, President Eagle Forum of Pennsylvania ******* Joe Glover, President Family Policy Network (Virginia) ******* Ron Shank, State Director Tennessee Family Policy Network ******* Michael S. Heath, Executive Director Christian Civic League of Maine ******* Brian Camenker, President Article 8 Alliance of Massachusetts ******* Mark Forton, Chairman Michigan Conservative Union ******* Brannon Howse, President & Founder Worldview Weekends of America ******* Denise Kanter Considering Homeschooling Ministry # # # Mail service for Mission America provided by American Family Online www.afo.net # # # Mission America www.missionamerica.com ********************************************************************************************************************* ******* item 13 SAME SEX ATTRACTION AND MENTAL HEALTH ******* From: "+Marty" via "elva prepchuk" ******* Date: Sat, 23 Jul 2005 ******* I received this in an email from an organization I'm licensed under. I hope you find it helpful' ******* Blessings, Elva ******* Reply-To: IMDHA_hypnosismentor@yahoogroups.com ******* The interview below is enlightening to those of us who deal with same sex relationship problems. It appeared in today's ZENIT, which is a news service in Rome. While Catholic in tone, Dr. Fitzgibbon's thinking pattern is similar to moral teachings of Judaism, Fundamentalists and some Bible-belt areas. Please read this from the background of a counselor. American Psychiatric Association's (APA's) acceptance of the state of SSA and "Marriage" in IMHO is a make work program of a serious mental health issue. ******* Blessings, +Marty ******* For the Greater Glory of God ******* Same-Sex "Marriage" and Mental Health ******* Interview With Dr. Rick Fitzgibbons of Catholic Medical Association ******* WEST CONSHOHOCKEN, Pennsylvania, JULY 20, 2005 (Zenit.org ) ******* A recent meeting of the American Psychiatric Association calling for the legalization of same-sex marriage shows a political agenda that disregards scientific data, says a psychiatrist. ******* Dr. Rick Fitzgibbons was a major contributor to "Homosexuality and Hope," an essay by the Catholic Medical Association, and co-author of "Helping Clients Forgive: An Empirical Guide for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope" (American Psychological Association Books, 2000). ******* Fitzgibbons shared his views with ZENIT about the APA's definition of same-sex marriage as a mental health "need" for the stability of the partners and the children they adopt. ******* Q: Is the opinion of the APA on same-sex unions and adoption consistent with the research on the medical and psychiatric difficulties in those with same-sex attractions and on the developmental needs of children? ******* Fitzgibbons: No. The APA has chosen to ignore the significant medical research which has documented serious psychiatric and medical illnesses associated with those same-sex attractions and behaviors. ******* This research and that on the needs of children for a father and a mother have been reviewed in several important recent papers from the University of South Carolina School of Medicine and the University of Utah School of Medicine . ******* The peer-reviewed literature demonstrates that an inability to maintain committed relationships and rampant promiscuity are the norm in the homosexual lifestyle. To illustrate this, one recent study in Amsterdam, by Xiridou, demonstrated that 86% of the new cases of AIDS came from those in committed relationships, and that those in casual relationships averaged between 16-28 sexual partners per year. ******* Q: What else does the research show in regards to psychiatric and medical health risks for those living the homosexual lifestyle? ******* Fitzgibbons: Well-designed research studies have shown that many psychiatric disorders are far more prevalent, three to five times, in teen-agers and adults with same-sex attraction [SSA]. These include major depression, suicidal ideation and attempts, anxiety disorders, substance abuse, conduct disorder, low self-esteem in males and sexual promiscuity with an inability to maintain committed relationships. ******* It is important to note that "homophobia" is not the cause of these disorders, as many of these studies were done in cultures in which homosexuality is widely accepted. ******* Another recent study has shown that a high percentage, 32%, of males with same sex attraction (SSA) have been abused by other males with SSA. ******* In addition, those with SSA have a shortened life expectancy. The sexual practices in the lifestyle, particularly sodomy, are associated with numerous serious medical illnesses. All this research was ignored by the APA. ******* Q: What do the social and medical perspectives of scientific research indicate about the needs of a child for a father and a mother? ******* Fitzgibbons: Dr. Reekers and Dr. Byrd's summary of some of the vast literature on child development demonstrates the vital importance of a father and a mother for the developmental needs of a child. ******* In effect, the social science research supports the recent statement of the Vatican that to deliberately deprive a child of a father or a mother through adoption by those in the homosexual lifestyle would inflict severe harm onto those children. ******* The APA's statement ignores the vast scholarship on the needs of children such as Henry Biller's "Fathers and Families: Paternal Factors in Child Development," which includes a bibliography of almost 1,000 separate articles or books on the positive effects of fathers on children. ******* These studies were not done as part of a political campaign, but as serious scholarship to increase our knowledge of child development. The literature on the needs of a child for a mother is even more extensive, and was equally ignored. ******* Q: If the opinion of the APA in support of same-sex unions and adoption is not based on medical, psychiatric and social science research, then what do you think it is based upon? ******* Fitzgibbons: I believe that the decision is an ideological and a political one, not one based in medical science or on the protection of the health of adults or of children. ******* The unscientific position of the APA brings to mind the warning of Pope Benedict XVI in regards to the dictatorship of relativism in the West. ******* In my professional experience as a psychiatrist with expertise on the nature and treatment of excessive anger, the APA's decision is strongly influenced by a long standing bias toward Judeo-Christian and, particularly, Catholic morality. The recent legal recognition of same sex unions by Canada and Spain which is not based on medical science or on the well-being of adults and children is another illustration of this bias. ******* This bias has led to the experience of not a small number of Catholics with mental health professionals in which their faith and morality have been blamed for either their emotional struggles or those in their child, or in which attempts were made to change their moral code in regard to sexuality. ******* Q: What advice would you give to other psychiatrists, psychologists and counselors, faced with this ideological trend in their fields? ******* Fitzgibbons: A number of colleagues have told me that they plan to leave the APA because of its abandonment of medical science and its caving in to an ideological and political agenda. ******* Personally, in this struggle I have been encouraged by, and have encouraged some of my colleagues, with the words of John Paul II, "Prayer joined to sacrifice constitutes the most powerful force in human history." ******* Catholic mental health professionals need to trust that the Lord will act to protect the sacrament of marriage, but we need to do our part. ******* Also, regardless of the APA's unscientific statement, doctors have a responsibility to inform their patients of the dangers of the homosexual lifestyle. ******* In his study "The Health Risks of Gay Sex," an internist and colleague, Dr. John R. Diggs Jr., wrote, "As a physician, it is my duty to assess behaviors for their impact on health and well-being. When something is beneficial, such as exercise, good nutrition or adequate sleep, it is my duty to recommend it. Likewise, when something is harmful, such as smoking, overeating, alcohol or drug abuse, it is my duty to discourage it. As a physician, it is my duty to inform patients of the health risks of homosexual sex, and to discourage them from indulging in harmful behaviors." ******* Q: What advice would you offer Catholic parents in regard to the attempt to redefine marriage and establish same-sex civil unions and adoption? ******* Fitzgibbons: Catholic parents today need an understanding of homosexuality in view of both the attempts to redefine marriage and of the crisis in the Church. ******* This knowledge is available in the updated brochure of the Catholic Medical Association , and at the Web site of the National Association for Research and Treatment of Homosexuality . ******* Contrary to the media and professional organizations' political propaganda, same-sex attractions are not genetically determined and are preventable and treatable. ******* Parents would be helped by reading Pope Benedict's recent statement on marriage and civil unions when he headed the Congregation for Doctrine and Faith. He wrote, "The marital union of man and woman has been elevated by Christ to the dignity of a sacrament. The Church teaches that Christian marriage is an efficacious sign of the covenant between Christ and the Church." ******* Other excellent family resources which can help parents present to their children the beauty of God's plan for marriage and for human sexuality are "The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality," from the Pontifical Council for the Family; "Humanae Vitae"; "Love and Responsibility"; John Paul II's "Theology of the Body"; and the Catechism of the Catholic Church. ******* In response to the recent APA statement, Catholic parents need to monitor more carefully their children's education, because many educators will now intensify their present efforts to initiate required curriculum on homosexuality from grades 1-12. ******* These programs fail to present the truth about the homosexual lifestyle, including the inability to maintain commitment, the rampant promiscuity, the medical and psychiatric illnesses and damage done to children who are denied their right to a father and a mother. ******* Instead, these biased efforts attempt to falsely portray homosexuality as a healthy alternative lifestyle. Parents should request that the truth be presented to their children. ******* Many of these educational programs attempt to mask their true goals by the use of names such as diversity, tolerance or "no name-calling weeks" when, in fact, they attempt to undermine the Church's teaching on marriage, human sexuality and, now child-rearing. ******* Catholics should also act in the political arena to influence elected officials to learn the truth about homosexuality and to support the basic unit of society upon which the well-being of a society is founded, the family, based on a marriage between a man and a woman. ******* ZE05072023 **************************************************************************************************************** ******* item 14 INTERVIEW WITH A PARENTS' RIGHTS ACTIVIST: BRIAN CAMENKER ******* by Joseph Nicolosi, Ph.D. ******* Updated: 20 September 2004 ******* This article can be found on line at http://www.narth.com/docs/camenker.html ******* In cooperation with gay groups such as GLSEN and GLAAD, the state of Massachusetts has recently instituted a broad range of gay-affirming Health and Human Sexuality programs. Some of these programs have caught the attention of parents, who are disturbed at the programs' one-sided approach, and also their tendency to override the values of many parents. Here, NARTH interviews Massachusetts parent-activist Brian Camenker. ******* JN: Tell us, Brian, what is the Parents' Rights Coalition? And what motivated you to get started? ******* BC: It's an organization focusing mainly on the gay-affirming and sex-education programs in the state of Massachusetts. ******* JN: You're a computer programmer with two children in the public school system in that state. What problems did you see in those programs? ******* BC: In my hometown of Newton in 1992, a group of parents became very concerned about the homosexual agenda and the general approach to sexuality being introduced into the community schools by those programs. ******* When we first went to the local school committee to discuss our concerns, we were rebuffed. They called us some very unflattering names, and said that the community should avoid people like me because I was a Christian fundamentalist. Even though I'm Jewish! We basically got nowhere. Then the newspapers contacted me. ******* Later that year the Catholic Archbishop of Boston called a meeting of intellectuals, academics, and others from different ethnic backgrounds and religious faiths to talk about the issues troubling them in our culture. One of those issues of concern was Massachusetts' new sex-education programs. This group became The Interfaith Coalition of Massachusetts, and I was elected chairman. ******* JN: And then what happened? ******* BC: The first thing we wanted to do was create the "Parents' Rights Bill," which we wrote and presented to the State Legislature. Essentially, it said that parents have to be told when their children are being put into these courses. They should have the option to remove their kids if they wished; schools could not take retribution on the kids that had opted out; and parents had the right to see the course material. ******* Over a period of time, The Interfaith Coalition became the Parents' Rights Coalition. In short order our work began to generate a lot of controversy, and then a lot of the clergy involved didn't want to take the heat, and they stepped back. ******* What was left of our group then solidified, and it became less of a group of academics and community leaders, and more of a group of thousands of parents. ******* JN: It seems that many religious leaders tend to avoid conflict, doesn't it? ******* BC: Oh, yes, there was a great reticence about controversy. Eventually we had to forget about the religious leaders and rely on the parents instead. They were the ones who carried us through. ******* What happened next, was that we presented this bill in the State Legislature. It got tremendous hostility from the Teachers' Unions and the homosexual groups. Tremendous, tremendous hostility. However, we battled on, we got thousands of parents involved, and it took a couple of years--but we got it passed by both Houses, and then signed into law by Governor Bill Weld. ******* Now during that process, unfortunately it got watered down a lot, but still, it was a great victory for us and a great defeat for them because they put a tremendous amount of effort into killing it. ******* One of the interesting things was when it came down to the very last afternoon of the legislative session, we were outside the chambers of the House of Representatives, and the activists had a dozen of their key lobbyists there. They were polling every single member of the legislature as they came in and went out, as to how they were going to vote. In that same room, we had 120 parents! These activists were very upset because for the first time, they were being challenged. ******* These little mothers, some had come in 100 miles from Worcester, saying to the legislators, "Why won't you let us have these rights, why are you doing this to our children?" And the legislators had no answers. ******* JN: They weren't expecting such resistance. ******* BC: They're used to being the intimidators. They're used to holding the moral high ground against people they had been painting as bad guys, and they were in shock at who they actually had to answer to. They had to answer to a group of dedicated mothers. ******* JN: So much of the success of the gay agenda has always been because the victims take the moral high ground. The fact they tend to blur, is that while gay-bashing is morally objectionable to everyone, people are entitled to voice legitimate, principled objection. There are some reasonable distinctions to be made between homosexuality and heterosexuality, and that of course is not "hatred" of a group of people. ******* BC: Indeed it is not. But the Legislature did not want to pass this bill, so we essentially had to show them that we had the support to get it through, and now it is state law. ******* Since then, we've had some other minor victories too. In my own situation with my then 11-year-old daughter in the sixth grade, she was put in a Health course whose goal, among other things, was to help each child understand his race, class, ethnicity, and sexual orientation. This was a course they had in place for an 11-year-old. ******* The principal would not let me take her out. He said the Massachusetts court curriculum guidelines required Health, and so I presented all of this to the State Board of Education. ******* A few months later, the state Board of Education removed Health from the curriculum guidelines. ******* But that victory stirred up a new controversy. Making my experience as an example of what's wrong in Massachusetts, The Boston Globe was livid, and they published a story that was very unflattering about me. But the controversy settled down again because parents and a lot of other people got involved. What I've found is that's what it takes--parents getting involved. ******* JN: Why is it so hard to mobilize parents? ******* BC: The other side is tremendously well organized. But mostly, parents have their own lives to live and don't have the time to get involved in activism to defend the issues that are important to them. On the other hand, our opposition on this issue can invest a great deal of time, energy and passion in what they believe in. ******* Also, many people are simply unaware of what is happening. When we show them these school curriculums, they don't believe us. ******* I have a close friend, an older guy who was in interned in Nazi concentration camps in Word War II. He was a Holocaust survivor, and he "gets it"...he understands the problem of denial and how it can paralyze a whole society. When people don't believe something is actually going on, they go about their lives as if nothing is happening. ******* So because people can't imagine it is that extreme, we've very carefully documented all of what we talk about. ******* In fact, we had an article about us in the National Review, in September 1995, that documented a lot of this. We still get calls from that article. ******* JN: Where can people reach you? ******* BC: Our address is The Parents Rights Coalition, P.O. Box 175, Newton, MA 02466. We have a voice mail at (781) 433-7106. We finally were able to get an office with an Executive Director--we've been able to raise enough money from concerned citizens to establish ourselves. ******* Our tape has been heard by thousands of people by now. In fact when the Speaker of the Massachusetts House of Representatives heard it, he called me into his office while the House was in session to talk about his concerns about the school system. But that time, the lawmakers didn't have the guts to follow through and actually do something. ******* JN: They were intimidated. ******* BC: They didn't want to offend anyone. So our job in this next year is to make them more afraid of the voters than they are of the gay agenda. What I think is their Achilles' heel, is the recovery movement. ******* JN: Absolutely. ******* BC: That is their Achilles' heel, and that's what we have to nurture in Massachusetts. ******* JN: Where do you plan to go from here? ******* BC: What our latest objective is to de-fund the million and half dollars that Republican Governor Celucci gives every year to the Gay/Straight Alliance out of the state budget. We think that should be a private enterprise, like our group--not a cause promoted by tax dollars. As our audiotape reveals, this group has been incredibly destructive in the public schools. ******* Another thing we've done is to documented the educational abuses we talk about. I can cite the location of every one I've mentioned--"chapter and verse." ******* Another thing we did here in Newton is to support candidates for the school committee. Recently we almost won several seats, so the school committee is worried about us. ******* JN: What do they say about your tape? ******* BC: One of the committee members called me up and we went to lunch this past Friday. I pulled out documentation of all of these things that are going on in the public schools. She didn't believe what I'd said--until I showed her the papers and handouts. ******* JN: What is your strategy in approaching the schools? ******* BC: We used to just say to the school committees, "We hope that this is something you won't do, because of this-and-that reason." But we've changed. You need to confront these people directly. ******* Our stand now is, "You do not have the right or the authority to do this to our children." That is a different perspective that takes them a little off-guard, and it is much more effective. Because in these programs, nobody is standing up and admitting to the kids, "This is a self-destructive lifestyle that could kill you." ******* Someone who believes in what we're doing once came here and spoke to a Parents' Rights gathering. At first he was arguing whether or not these programs that support kids in getting into a gay lifestyle are a civil right or not. I believe that when you argue on that level, you've lost. I believe you have to get right to the heart of it, right to the behavior, right to what a gay lifestyle really is...the whole way it tears apart your soul. ******* One of the reasons that I feel more comfortable than others in discussing this is that in my own life I've had many close friends who are homosexual. I've seen close-up what this does to them...the inner turmoil they're going through. ******* I may not be a psychologist, but I can see very clearly--I'd say, intuitively--that homosexuality has got to be a symptom of something deeper going on in the individual. ******* JN: I agree. It's about a deep desire to be acceptable within the company of members of one's own sex, and to experience their affirmation, attention and affection. Homosexuality is not, fundamentally, about sex. It's a search for identity and a sense of belonging. ******* BC: Yes, that's exactly how I see it. They take these fragile, confused kids and say to them: "Well, you may feel unsure of who you are, but from what you've told us, we've decided that what you really are is homosexual, so come on downtown and meet these other guys." ******* The superintendent of the schools at Newton actually had a public meeting, where he introduced a 16-year-old who talked about his love for men. The superintendent was proud of this! This is how the schools' Gay/Straight Alliances are helping kids. ******* George Orwell once said that "There's no idea so bizarre that it will not be accepted by an intellectual." It seems that the smarter people are, the more willing they are to accept nonsense that simply contradicts common sense. ******* I live in Newton, which has several Nobel Prize winners, and... ******* JN: ...And I bet they're all paralyzed when it comes to thinking clearly and decisively about these issues. ******* BC: You're right. ******* JN: Because the intellectual says, "Well, I don't know...maybe it's true, who can say, who can judge? Maybe that's his truth, even if it's not my truth." When you talk about something that you passionately believe to be true, and offer reasonable arguments, their eyes just glaze over. ******* In fact--I still laugh when I remember this--The New York Times ran an article in 1998 called "Analysts Get Together for a Synthesis." It was a report on a psychoanalytic conference at Mt. Sinai Hospital in Manhattan. ******* Analysts now tend to avoid the attempt to get to the truth in their patients' histories--"abandoning certainty in favor of a reasonable myth the patient can believe in." ******* "The discussion of true versus false is a false issue," one analyst said. Another conceded, "We're all anxious to show what we don't know." ******* "During the meeting," said The Times, "only a few analysts claimed to know anything." ******* BC: Yet they all believe that homosexuality is normal and healthy, and a gay lifestyle is good. That, they seem to have no doubt about. ******* The root of this problem--and so many other people around me find to be true also--is that when you give up believing in a transcendent moral order reflected in human nature, with laws that mankind cannot change by popular vote, then anything's possible. Anything at all is possible when you say there is no objective truth. That's a big problem, particularly among intellectuals, who are much smarter than God. ******* One of the things for which I've looked to NARTH, is help in getting the scientific facts together. I really enjoyed a book by one of your Scientific Advisory Board members, Jeffrey Satinover. His Homosexuality and the Politics of Truth has been very important to us. I also liked both of Scott Lively's books...very good. That's what I find is very powerful--when you confront people with the truth. ******* JN: People who in their gut feel there's something not quite right about homosexuality. That's what I call "natural homophobia." I'm not talking about the kind of homophobia that leads to gay-bashing or scapegoating...we all know, without question, that's wrong. I'm talking about the gut feeling people have that there is something not really quite normal about two men or two women falling in love. ******* The average person just knows there is something missing there. There is--as a very prominent member of the American Psychiatric Association, Dr. Robert Spitzer, recently admitted--something that is just "not working" when a person has no capacity for heterosexual arousal. ******* But when the layman thinks this way, he is hit with so-called scientific information that disproves his intuition about homosexuality, and then he feels guilty and embarrassed about having had that intuition. The gay movement says that his idea is the same as racial hatred--a feeling all of us know is reprehensible. So at that point, the average person just throws up his hands. After all, if science is against him, then his feelings must represent nothing more than ignorance and prejudice. ******* But the fact is, science supports his gut reaction. ******* BC: And NARTH is clarifying that for us--that there's scientific information on the other side of this issue. ******* JN: I'm glad we've been able to get the information out there. ******* BC: By the way, I've discovered that when I deal with the media, it's actually better to say it exactly as it is; don't sugar-coat it. ******* I had an interesting situation on WGBH-TV,, the public television center in Boston. They had me there on a talk show last year. I was on on Emily Rooney's show--she's Andy Rooney's daughter--along with a woman who's the head of The New England Gay and Lesbian Advocacy. ******* Emily Rooney's first question was, "Well Mr. Camenker, what is it about homosexuality that seems to bother you so much?" ******* And I said, "Well Emily, for one thing it's a public-health problem. A lifetime of anal sex does not do great things for the body." ******* Nobody had ever said that on public television. ******* JN: So you got right to it. ******* BC: The place erupted. They started screaming at me. ******* JN: Because as troubling as that statement sounds, there is no logical argument against it. ******* BC: So then she said, "Well, what about lesbians?" And I mentioned something about the lesbian sexual practices that happened to be described in detail to kids in my daughter's "Living and Learning" health class--a particular practice which happens to be especially gross. ******* She said, "What do you know about what I do with my sexuality--what do you know?" ******* I said, "Emily, that's the whole point, we don't want to know. Nobody wants to know." And neither do our children need to be taught these things in junior high school. ******* She apparently is heterosexual, but she just lost it. ******* I must have gotten letters and phone calls from people for two months saying, "Boy, you were wonderful!" ******* JN: Sometimes you have to get right down to the bottom line and just say it. Because the paradox is that many people who support the full affirmation of homosexuality in our society do not even want to consider what the actual behavior is. ******* BC: No, they don't. ******* JN: They like to think, as someone once commented, "that gay men just hug." ******* BC: In fact, I've found that the truth is a very powerful thing. I think it was Pope Paul who was quoted in the Wall Street Journal, of all places saying essentially, "The main thing that brought about freedom in Eastern Europe and destabilized the totalitarian movement was people's refusal to lie." That is what we have to learn. ******* JN: And your audiotape has been pretty clear in delivering the facts about what's been happening in the schools. ******* BC: We've gotten out that one-hour tape to thousands of people by now. In fact, when the Speaker of the Massachusetts House of Representatives heard it, he called me into his office while the House was in session to talk about his concerns about the school system. Of course, he didn't have the guts to do anything. But our job in this next year is to make them more afraid of the voters than they are of the gay agenda. ******* What I think is their Achilles' heel, is the recovery movement. ******* JN: Absolutely. And that's where NARTH comes in. ******* BC: Right. That is their Achilles' heel, and that's what we have to nurture here in Massachusetts. ******* JN: This is really where the solution lies--reparative therapy, the healing of homosexuality. When we show a person who was once gay and now is no longer gay, that pulls the rug out from under the entire notion that there are two distinct groups of people, different from birth--gay people and straight people. ******* BC: I don't think we're really going to get anywhere until we can get the recovery movement off the ground. ******* JN: That's what NARTH is trying to do. ******* BC: It must be extremely difficult. I can imagine that it is one of the most difficult things for a person to get free from--harder, I would think, than alcoholism. ******* JN: Yes it is, because there's not just an addictive behavior involved, but it's more than that--the basic issue goes back to identity. The only solution for many men seems to be an annihilation of the self, and an identification with an idealized male who it seems must be "out there" somewhere, if only he can find him. The issue is about a struggle with self-hatred, and about the search for identity. ******* BC: You know, I personally have known dozens of such men. I've had many as close friends who I deeply cared about, and I've seen this torment and watched it in their lives. And I hope to persuade the Massachusetts schools that they aren't helping our kids by opening up the door into a destructive lifestyle. ******* JN: NARTH's position is that the teenage years are not the time to make a decision about sexual identity. This is a decision to be made by a mature person in adulthood, when all the facts are available, and when the options can be carefully considered, and he has the benefit of a few more years of life experience. ******* Thanks very much, Brian, for a most interesting description of what's happening in Massachusetts. ******* In our next issue, we'll publish a transcript of your audiotape describing those Massachusetts school programs in detail. **************************************************************************************************************** ****************************************************************************************************************

Links to other sites on the Web

(YF1a1) purity of your soul
(YF1a2) children of same sex parents
(YF1a3) Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays web site
(YF1a4) (American) National Educators Association Ex-Gay Caucus
(YF1a5) Citizens for Parents' Rights
(YF1a6) (YF) home page

Who are your true friends: those who tell you what you want to hear or those who tell you what they really think? ***************************************************************** The following warning is a prophetic message given to me (Frank Wagner) in November of 1974. ******* LISTEN TO THE CRY OF THE ABORTED CHILDREN. THEIR CRY IS NO. THEIR CRY IS A CRY OF TERROR. HEED THEIR CRY. ******* This prophecy is now being fulfilled. ******* For details about the source, meaning and fulfillment of this prophetic message go to ******* http://www.oocities.org/abortedchildren/index.html ***************************************************************** Check out some of my other sites: ******* http://www.oocities.org/fwagner12/index.html (Vancouver Youth Alliance) ******* http://www.oocities.org/fwagner6/index.htm (Vancouver ex-gay alternatives club) ***************************************************************** email me (Frank Wagner) at friendsofexgays@yahoo.ca