Inglorious Bastards (1977)
Directed by Enzo Castellari.  Starring Bo Svenson, and Fred Williamson.
This Italian made war movie is kind of a cross between The Dirty Dozen, and Kellys' Heroes. It's directed by Enzo Castellari, master of the slo-mo action sequence. It's about a bunch of murderers, thieves, and other law-breaking G.I's who are being transported to the stockade to be courtmartialed. The sergeant who's in charge of this operation is the guy who played 'Ice' in 1990: The Bronx Warriors, and the mayor in Great White, and he's just
as power hungry in this role too ( I've worked with a few guys just like him). For some reason the convoy has to go through enemy lines to get to the stockade. This puzzled me, because naturally it should be in allied territory. Naturally, the Germans don't take kindly to this at all, and it isn't long before a Focke Wulf with a bad attitude decides to turn the truck into something resembling a tea strainer. This is a good excuse for director Castellari to treat us to some great slo-mo action. The M.P's run for cover, ordering the prisoners to stay put like sitting ducks. Most of them wisely make a break for it. Between getting strafed by the enemy, and shot at by their own men, most of them die in slow motion glory. However a few prisoners, with the aid of Fred Williamsons incredibly laboured looking jiu-jitsu are able to overpower the gaurds. Only five prisoners  survive . They are Bo Svenson ( Bigfoot), Fred Williamson( Boss Nigger), a Judge Reinhold lookalike, a Tom Savini lookalike, and a guy who you just know will cause trouble. To cut a long story short, the fugitives go on the run, accidentally kill some commandos disguised as Germans, and then feeling guilty about killing them, decide to complete the commando's mission which is blowing up a train. The good points about Inglorious Bastards are many. The uniforms, weapons, and machines are incredibly authentic ( It always annoys me when I watch a war movie where the Germans are riding round in Sherman tanks), and the action sequences for the most part are very well done, especially the whole train sequence. Some of the model buildings,the train etc. look pretty cheap , but are still curiously likeable and still more realistic than todays overused CGI.
One scene where Fred Williamson throws a grenade at a German, and he is clearly hoisted towards the roof by a rope to simulate the force of the explosion had me in stitches. I also laughed at the scene where our heroes are cavorting with a bunch of young, naked, German women at a waterhole who chase after them ( still naked ) with sub-machine guns when they find out that they're Americans. Also, keep a look-out for a German prisoner that our heroes capture. He's the spitting image of Al Cliver! All in all, if you're sick of watching Apocalypse Now, and Platoon, check out Inglorious Bastards, one of the first gritty war films....there are no John Waynes here.
Entertainment: 3 out of 4
Watchability: 2 out of 4
Overall : 2.5 out of 4
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The Big Red One.
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aka. Counterfeit Commandos aka.G.I. Bro
Reviewed by Blake.
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