Horror stories for the day

No matter how much you try to avoid it, no matter how tightly you close your eyes and wish it away, sooner or later, you have to face the moment of truth - swimsuits! .....

Whale of a time

I'm getting really nervous (and really BIG) the closer I get to my due date. I waddle when I walk now! Although my weight gain has been good, I still feel really huge.

Not only are you eating for two, you are sweating for two. I even risked being mistaken for a lost whale by donning a lovely maternity swimsuit and trying to beat the heat

*****

Speaking of beached, you should have seen me at the beach over the fourth. I actually strutted my stuff in my maternity bikini! Who would have ever thought, huh? Unless you've ever been pregnant, there is NO way to understand the feelings I've had. I'm scared, excited, miserable, happy, sad, impatient and a whole lot more!!

Viva Las Vegas?

I have tried and tried to find an attractive maternity bathing suit, both in stores and online. And, you know what? One doesn't exist!! They are all horrifically ugly! Why can't someone make an attractive maternity bathing suit? How hard can it be?! So, I guess we won't be doing any swimming in Vegas...unless it's in our hotel room Jacuzzi.....

Our hotel is lovely and we have a private terrace and pool. This is a blessing, since I look like a boat in the only costume I could find.

Theres also a hot tub, I know I’m not supposed to– there’s the risk of turning my baby into a ‘boil-in-bag’ chicken – but temptation takes over and I decide to go for it. Blame the lovely a spa attendant Millie.

Angry!

I too was appalled at the lack of choice in maternity clothes during my two pregnancies. I'm not exactly a stylish hipster, but even I could not abide wearing ruffled jumpers with teddy bears on them. There seemed to be just two choices -- power maternity clothes (way too expensive, but stylish), or teddy bear jumpers and tent tops embroidered with Minnie Mouse (affordable, but tacky). Being tall made the situation worse; most of the reasonable-looking maternity items that I did find were too short in the sleeves and legs. And although all of my pregnancy books endorsed swimming as an excellent way to exercise while pregnant, it was very difficult to find a maternity bathing suit that could actually be used for swimming laps.

I did manage to pull together maternity outfits that expressed my sense of style. I found some simple jean overalls and black stretch overalls at a used maternity-clothing shop (no embroidery, no bunnies, no ruffles). I bought some stretchy tunics (which I can still wear tucked into my pants) and vests (which I also still wear). I wore extra-large men's turtlenecks. I picked up a few items at plus size shops. It took me days to locate a maternity swimsuit that didn't have a drag-inducing ruffled skirt or a design that prohibited freedom of movement; although the one I finally bought had a lurid floral pattern, it was actually simple and functional.

A pregnant woman must improvise to preserve her sense of self -- even if it's in a trivial arena like fashion.

Waiting game

When you're pregnant you may not be as comfortable showing your body in a swimsuit, but perhaps you still want to go to the pool for some exercise and kill those days to the birth.

To pass the time I swim laps.. Think about the sperm and how they need to swim to your egg. Imagine that you are a sperm, the end of the pool is the egg, then GO, GO, GO! Don't wear a tail or anything. Just imagine it quietly.

Tent effect

I looked good in my floral maternity bathing suit. That bathing suit, along with the horizontally striped dresses I wore belong in my "What Was I Thinking?" Hall of Fame, even surpassing the lace-up hip-huggers I wore in the '70s. The pink-and-white suit covered my thighs, so I thought all was well. The photos suggest otherwise: I looked like a carousel with feet. We were able to recycle it, however. We used the top as a tarp for our house when we took the roof off of our kitchen for a renovation.

*****

I found my swimsuit! It took a little while and I tell you, it isn't easy finding a maternity swimsuit that doesn't make you look like a boat. But the clever designer has inserted a dress which makes me look real slim. Tomorrow I'm going swimming!

D*I*S*C*O

Catalina also told me to go swimming so not having a maternity costume I duly trotted off to Mothercare and bought one! As I was still at work I had to go swimming at night and the first night I went it was an under 14 years disco party in the
pool! Even better the next night was a scouts night. That night was the Tuesday and after swimming I got down to some serious strumming (the usual nightly ritual!)

Show off

The day before I bought myself a maternity bathing suit. I thought 'what the heck, I won't know anybody and how often will I be pregnant at the beach anyway?'

I got loads of real nice compliments whilst warming up for a swim, It was pretty fun wearing it too, (it wasn't so fun after developing the picture and actually seeing it!).

Hugh stomach

....How depressing in a bathing suit. Huge rounded pig stomach- bad hair- and reflective legs!!!!! But when October comes we'll have such fabulous compensation!!!!!! I just can't wait to hold that little someone in my arms.....

and finally.......

I also bought a maternity bathing suit online. Ugh! As if buying a regular swimming suit isn't depressing enough!