Once upon a time in the kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days.
Michael the Archangel found him resting on the seventh day.
He inquired of God, "Where have you been?"
God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael, look what I've made."
Archangel Michael looked puzzled and asked, "What is it?"
"It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."
"Balance?" inquired Michael.
God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth, "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while Southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hotspot, while the poles will be covered in ice; Over there I've placed a continent of white people," God continued, pointing at different countries, "This one will be extremely hot and arid, while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."
The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a large land mass in the top corner and asked, "What's that one?"
"Ah," said God, "That's Canada, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful mountains, lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coast line. The people from Canada are going to be modest, intelligent and humourous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely socialable, hard-working and high-achieving, and they'll be known throughtout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace. I'm also going to give them super-human, undefeatable ice hocky players who will be admired anf feared by all who come across them."
Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there would be BALANCE!"
God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the loud-mouth bastards I'm putting next to them."
