| Game Review Archive, Part Eight |
| December 18, 2001 vs Columbus BJs Marian Gaborik picked up a goal and assist Friday night agianst expansion brother Columbus. A fellow Czechoslovakian called him in Columbus to offer encouragement. Winger Ziggy Palffy of LA felt a phone call would be necessary to comfort the heartbreak and injustice that Marian and the rest of the Wild squad recently had withstood. "It should be (you) going to Los Angeles (for the All-Star game), not me", Ziggy said to Marian via satelite phone from New York, "I am soooo sorry about this, I wish I could give my spot to you, you deserve it more than I do", he continued, "After all, I only had 10 goals and 10 assists (at the time of selection), you had 16 goals and 26 assists." "It's ok, don't worrry about it, dawg", Marian replied, "At least I get to participate in the festivities. That YoungStars game presented by Topps should be fun for the whole family" "Kick some ass in Ohio tonight", Ziggy concluded. We here at SirMarian are not sure what the criteria is for all-star selection, but we think Marian should be on the World team, not Palffy. No disrespect to Palffy, but Marian has had more of a "star" season this year so far. January 19th, 2001 vs Ottawa Senators Marian scored 0 goals and had 0 assists for a combined total of 0 points Saturday vs. the Senators. His +/- was -2, he had 1 shot on goal, 0 penalty minutes, 0 hits, and was on the ice for 13 minutes and 6 seconds. "Dude, I am dissapointed with myself tonight", Marian said to a reporter, "I usually play well when I play against Marian (Hossa), heh, we have the same first names too." Wild commentator Barry Buetel summed it up best when he said at the end of the game, "Let's see here, the Wild had 1 goal on, um, 23 shots? (pause) That's it? 23 goddamn shots?" Play-by-play commentator Bob Kurtz quickly pointed out to his partner that you can't say "goddamn" on the air. "Don't worry, nobody is listening anyway", Barry concluded. The Wild lost 4-1. January 23rd, 2001 vs Mighty Ducks of Anaheim The Wild lost in overtime to Anaheim, 3-2, the first ever loss for the Wild in Southern California (I think, don't quote me on this...ever). This did not stop Marian from playing well in his second favorite state. The Man showed one of his moves late in the game (3 seconds left) to help the Wild gain a point in the standings. He deked left while moving right and passed the puck to himself via Ducks defensemen Ruslan Salei (he lost his stick), I thought this move was only possible in EA Sports NHL 2002! Oh yeah, and after the deke he scored to tie the game at 2-2. Marian was "sort of" at fault for giving up the Ducks game-winning goal, but lets not get into that just yet. LA is next. January 24th, 2002 vs LA Kings Umm, Marian didn't really do much in this game, just like the rest of the Wild. We'll assume that Marian was distracted by the Kournikova-Hingis-Hantuchova doubles tennis match which was airing on the Wild's bench TV. "I always knew we should have left that damned (TV) at the hotel", Wild coach Jaques Lemaire said after the game, "I always knew it would bring distraction, whose crazy idea was it to bring that thing to the game?" No one in the locker room answered, but forward Richard Park looked nervous after the group question was asked. "What?!", Park said defensively as his teammates all looked at him at the same time. The Wild lost 4-1 and Manny Fernandez had a roughing penalty. January 26th, 2002 vs New Jersey Devils Marian had a solid game against the defending Eastern Conference champs in the 2-2 tie. He picked up his 45th point of the season with an assist on Stacy Roest's second period goal. The goal was originally credited to Marian. "Oh well", Marian probably said, "at least I got a point." Marian also had five shots on goal and +1 rating. He will be preparing for his national TV appearance on Friday, February 1st in Los Angeles (which is America's second most populous metropolitan area, for you trivia buffs). "I hope there will be a lot of movie producers watching in the stands, I want to be in an action movie," Marian said, "I want to play a rookie cop who gets teamed up with a veteran cop played by someone like Robert Redford or Kevin Spacey," he continued, "My partner will show me the ropes as I make a name for myself...then maybe he gets killed and I have to avenge his death or something." Don't forget to watch ESPN on Friday. January 28th, 2002 vs Calgary Flames "You suck Iginla!!!" was the general consensus at the Xcel Enerrgy Center tonight. Even the refs got into the action, as one was overheard during a break in the action. At least I think it was a ref. Yeah, I'm sure of it. Just as sure as I am that Jarome Iginla should change his name to the correct spelling: Jerome. Anyways, that Wild killer broke a 7 game pointless streak with a tip in 57 seconds into overtime as the Minnesota Wild continued their horrid play in overtime games. As the Flames team showered Iginla with praise near the goal, Dick Park was seen skating by quickly, shouting "I disagree!!" With one game left until the all-star break, the Wild which are winless in its last five games and just 1-4-3-1 in the last nine, really need to get their act together. The only spark in an otherwise dreary performance in front of the home crowd was the play of Andrew Brunette, who netted a goal and an assist and actually ended with a Plus 1. The Man played pretty well, getting a team high 6 shots, while narrowly missing on many of them. After a first period interview with Clay Matvik, the Wild announcer, Andrew Brunette was seen taking the gift certificate he recieved from Continental diamond (home of the eight sided diamond) and ripping it to shreds, muttering "I sat through a half-assed interview from some two-bit amateur reporter for this chump change? Do they know who I am?" (not really) Wow and I thought Jerome, oh...I'm sorry, JAROME, had a big head. Same time, same place on Wed. I think many fans and players alike are looking forward to the All-star break. One more thing, make sure to check out Marian in the young stars game on Friday night. I predict 3 points, and 1 fight with that pansy Heatley. "Losing...is a disease, as contagious as the Bobonic Plauge. Losing...is a disease, as contagious as Syphilis. But oh...there is a cure." Guess the quote, win a prize... February 10th, 2002 vs NY Islanders It's nice to get back into the groove of things...however, I am leery at best in describing the Wild's win today against the Islanders a gaze at things to come in the second half of the season. Albeit the Wild's victory against a very tough New York line-up consisting of Alexi Yashin, Roman Hamrlik, Michael Peca and hometown hero Mark Parrish left the sellout crowd with a glimmer of hope, the Wild must continue to dominate the puck and keep the momentum in their favor on a game to game basis. OK, Enough of the serious stuff. Lemaire finally got his marbles organized and let the dogs run Wild. And when I say dogs, I mean the Three Wise Men. Marian Gaborik and his immortals took the ice together once again. For the first time since, oh, I'd say the Wild started their anemic offensive farce, the offense looked as rejuvenated as a 60 year old with a facelift. Although the three accounted for only 2 assists, the other players looked at them as the saviors that they are. Sergei Zholtok, the captain of the Latvian Olympic team, polished his goal scoring techniques by netting two third period goals to secure the victory, 4-3. By the way, the Latvian team, sans Zholtok, dismantled Slovakia's chances of an Olympic birth by tying them 6-6 tonight. Bastards. March 7th, 2002 vs St. Louis Blues Hallelujah!!! I awake from my sorrowing hibernation/hunger strike to the sweet sounds of Marian's shots slapping the back of the net. The Wild completed one of their best road games EVER as they dismantled the Blues of St. Louis (or just NellyLand if you will) 3-0. Marian Gaborik (AKA The Man) scored two goals (Andrew Brunette assisted on both), and Dwayne (don't call me Wayne) Roloson shut out the second highest payroll in the NHL by stoping a shitkickin' 28 shots. The Three Wise Men finished with 2 goals and 3 assists for 5 points, AND a combined +5 rating. Pardon my language, but holy shit. Oh, and I almost forgot the most coveted play in all of hockey; Marian Gaborik from Andrew Brunette and Jim Dowd. Kinda gives you goosebumps, doesn't it. The likes of Al MacInnis, Keith Tkachuk and Chris Pronger were reduced to nothing but a stain on the lockerroom floor as fellow Slovakian Pavol Demitra was seen in the fetal position near the corner of the training room, mumbling: "...I mean...I'm from his country, but I just don't understand it...(explitive)...who is this guy...and why am I... (explitive)...drooling at the site of his amazing skill...I'm cold...can someone bring me a (explitive) blanket and a copy of Oprah magazine? I think I am going to take up knitting..." Stay tuned for The Wild's rejuvinized play as they take on the Stars in Dallas tomorrow night at 7:30. March 17th, 2002 vs Phoenix Coyotes One goal, two goals, it doesn't really matter. Any way you look at it, its another two points tallied to The Man's already impressive numbers. The Wild recieved a much impresive 2-2 tie against a playoff bound team who is on fire at the moment. Marian Gaborik's second goal of the game, with less than three minutes left in the third period evened the score at 2. The goal was originally given the Jimmy Dowd, but later changed to The Man. The 2 goals by Phoenix were scored by fellow Slovak Ladislav Nagy, making it an all Slovakian fanfare. Oh, and by the way, the assists on the goals by Marian came from Brunette and Dowd...FOR BOTH. In The Man's last 5 games, he has 8 goals and 2 assists and is a +5, and in his last 7 games, he has 9 goals and 3 assists. Damn fine numbers. He recieved player of the week last week for his spectacular play, could the next award we hear possibly be player of the month? If he keeps this up, I have no reason to doubt it. By the way, Andrew Brunette has 10 points in his last 5 games and is +6, while Jimmy Dowd has 10 points and is a +4 with a 7 game assist streak, a record for the Wild. Add that all up and The Three Wise Men have combined for 30 points and a +/- of 15 in their past 5 games. Not bad for a line of guys who were split up earlier this year due to lack of defence. 11 of the 18 goals over the past 5 games have come by one of these three, and 30 of a possible 51 points. So all this boils down to is that The Three Wise Men are Gods, and they contributed to 59% of the Wild's points in the last 5 games. March 18th, 2002 vs Calgary Flames Marian Gaborik continued his torrid point production with another multi-point game, the third in his last 5 games, as his two assist helped tear apart any hope of the Flames playoff chances. God I love being the spoiler. Gabby now has 12 points in his last 6 games. Dick Park had the first two goal game of his career, while Gaborik and Brunette assisted on both. Dammit Brunette...slow down a bit, you know Gabby deserves the point lead for the Wild. However many points Gaborik has, Brunette does the same. Its not a contest, Brunette! Well..actually I guess it is. Said Marian after the game, "yeah, I mean uh, I score so many goals, I thought it would be nice to give someone else a shot, ya know, to boost their confidence. I instantly thought of Dick, he is a mighty fine player, so I gave him two sweet passes, which he burried both of. I wasn't going to since Brunette passed to me first, because he keeps stealing my points, but hey, I just wanna help the team, ya know, it's a team game..." and on and on. Way to go Wild. Too bad there's no hope for the playoffs. But keep it up and next year, your season will expand past April. Next up, the Blue Jackets, who actually won a game last night, and against the Flames, holy crap. The Blue Jackets are kind to Marian, since he scored a hat trick against them last week. What an exciting game this will be, don't miss it. Especially because Marian will get his 60th point of the season. Only 5 more points 'til 100 in his first two years. Simply amazing. March 26th, 2002 vs. St. Louis Blues This Wild team confuses the hell out of me, just like many other people. They play their best hockey against the best teams...ON THE ROAD, and can't beat lowly Columbus...AT HOME. Anyways, the Wild did pull out this nail biter, as Antti Laaksonan scored on a penalty shot in the 3rd period...final score: 2-1. The Wild now are 6-3-1-2 since the Olympic Break...and against some very good teams I might add. Marian continued his recent stellar play by adding an assist and playing overall a great physical game, ending with a +1. He is now a +1 for the whole year...AND, he reached 60 points tonight. Way to go Marian! |
| Back to SirMarian. |