What are spoilers? For those who may not know, I'm going to inform you. Dictionary.com offers very good definitions: Something that causes spoilage; a post to a newsgroup that divulges information intended to be a surprise, such as a plot twist in a movie; a remark which reveals important plot elements from books or movies/shows, thus denying the reader of the article the proper suspense when reading the book or watching the movie/show.
That is a spoiler. But why am I ranting about spoilers? After all Gabs, you say, spoilers are perfectly fine for those people who are happy to be spoiler hos. And I agree- if you make the conscious decision to become a SpoHo, that's fine. I myself was once a very ardent SpoHo. As recently as a month ago, I read every Alias spoiler I could find, and I was happy. Until a certain episode (The Getaway, I believe it was) when I didn't know about something big that happened at the end- Sloane's wife is alive and well! At that point, I realized something: VanDam, it woulda sucked if I had known that she'd been kicking it in the Phillipines, and not six feet under. In that very instant, I solemnly swore that I would reform my spoiler slut ways, and fight for the rights of the unspoiled!
Unfortunately, by that point I had already been largely spoiled on the next three episodes (though I managed to avoid total spoilage on the big Super Bowl ep- I didn't know about the S/V stuff or Francie! Go me!) and I had seen all the promo pics for them as well. So that kinda sucked.
But since then, I have studiously avoided all spoilers. Last Sunday's episode (A Free Agent), I was totally unspoiled for. I had seen some promo pics, but those didn't ruin anything for me- all they did was show the big guest star, Christian Slater. I was very proud to have been unspoiled, and the excitement of not knowing what was going to happen reaffirmed my devotion to my new mantra of 'spoiler free is the way to be.' So, if my SpoHo ways have been reformed and reaffirmed, why on Earth would I need to rant about spoilers? I mean, hey- they're harmless fun for the SpoHos who love them. They don't hurt me, right? Usually, I'd say right! I'm staying away from them, and away from any areas where I know spoilers lurk. I happily hang out at the Spoiler Support group boards, and chat with my fellow reformed SpoHo's. Sounds safe enough, and I've never had a problem there.
Until now.
A spoiler was posted there! At the thread for those of us who want desperately to stay AWAY from spoilers! Our one safe haven has been desecrated. And there wasn't even a warning- no spoiler tag, no spoiler space, nothing. It was just... there. Having seen what I saw, I am devastated. It was just three words, and it didn't truly give anything away. But just the endless possibilities behind this, it's driving me crazy. It makes me want to go see other spoilers, and maybe connect the dots until THIS one spoiler makes sense. That's how spoilers work, you see- they're connected. They work together in a well-oiled, cohesive unit, bringing evil wherever they go.
And that is why I had to rant about spoilers. Now, I feel better (to some extent) and as such, I am going to continue my blissfully (torturously) unspoiled existence. Spoiler free is the way to be. ~The Dictator Herself, Gabs Hardy