eXposed

In what can only be described as a blatant act of war, the gay community has begun recruiting forces into their growing army. 'Operation Wee-Wee In The Doo-Doo Hole' was launched secretly 4 months ago, and its success has led to the largest single military unit in the world. The mission began with the Chairmen of the High Fairies implanting recruiters and special forces units into normal society. While the recruiters drew in crowds with a

staggering benefits program and aggressive touching, the special forces units delivered fellatio attacks to unsuspecting victims. When some resisted these fellatio attacks, the special forces teams would resort to using force 'behind enemy lines' if you know what I mean. "We are exploding out of the closet and exploding in our pants. I mean, seriously, there is some major creamage going on." said Trevor Rizzuto, a spokesperson for the homosexual army.

The plan set forth by the homosexual community months ago consisted of four stages. In the first stage of the plan, the army implanted 'their kind' in the media. Ellen Degeneres got her own show where she subliminally promoted lesbian sex with dildos. Meanwhile, Carson Daly became the host of MTV's Total Request Live where he saturated the market with boy bands such as Backstreet Boys, N'Sync, 98 Degrees, O Town, and The Happy Man-O-Rific Summer Boys, whose song, "Humongous Load All Over My Face," topped the charts for 8 months.

In their current stage, they are taking over as many cities as they can and giving them gayer names. Cities like, Gayville South Dakota, or Asspound Missouri. Future plans are said to include the third stage; recruit mainstream icons such as Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, and Kurt Loder. If successful, the next Nike Air Jordan's could be rainbow colored with glitter on the laces. In the fourth stage, the capital of the United States of America will be moved to San Francisco.

Homosexual Sign Up Bonuses
* Lifetime Passes to Broadway Musicals
* Cameo Appearance in 'Will and Grace'
* Full Benefits:
    - Medical/Dental
     - 401k Plan
     - Stock Options
* Autographed Picture of Fred Durst
* Many Careers to Choose From:
    - Hair Stylist
     - Packer of Fudge
     - Boy Scout-Master
     - Elton John

The American military has changed its strategy to fight this battle with homosexuality. The front lines now consist of all-woman units. These female forces are offering up the seabass to all comers in an effort to win back the many men we have lost. When reached for comment on the current situation, Tony Danza replied, "Why are you asking me? I'm not gay." After his totally queer response, we gave him a look. "I swear I'm not gay." he continued while we sarcastically said 'ok' while miming a person giving head.

The obviously aroused Danza then claimed, "Can you people please leave my house now?" in a tone that made him sound like he was saying, "Can you people please come over here and shove something in my tight hole?" Ha ha, you are so gay Tony Danza!