Behold! 
The mighty "Ely-phunt"! 
'Got phour legs down 
and one up phrunt.

In phact - it's a phat, 
phunny, phunctional nose 
Phor picking up peanuts, 
or used as a hose.

I can't phigger out 
why his nose is his "trunk"; 
Any phool would agree 
that's "pholderol bunk"!

Phor on each other creature, 
and even a tree 
It's "trunk" is its body - 
just like you and me.

In a phamous pholk phable 
phrom phar ophph Bizerte, 
A phool "peppered" the phood 
of an Ely-phunt, "Gertie"!

Her phollowing "Kerchoo"! 
phlattened halph of Peru - 
'Smashed Cebu, Katmandu, 
and Timbuctu, too!

An Ely-phunt's pregnancy 
is two years in duration. 
Why! It takes phiphteen months 
just to lay the phoundation!

But the mother must have 
the most PHEE-rocious phears 
Oph "phoaling" an ophphspring 
with phour phoot ears!

Oph all land-based creatures, 
we all know phor sure - 
The Ely-phunt manuphactures 
the most tons of manure.

While phar up above, 
he devours leaphy tree-things, 
Phiercely pheeding below 
are phat phishworms and seedlings.

He ain't got no phingers, 
and just little, round "toeses", 
But he can tear down a house 
with his powerphul proboscis!

You say he looks sad? 
Well he should! It's disgracephul! 
To have only his nose 
to help pheed him a phace-phull!

And there's no phluphphy phur 
on his phlabby outside 
To spare us the sight 
of his phrightphul bare hide!

So I always pheel phunny 
and look sorta askance 
When I spy an Ely-phunt 
with no skirt or pants!

But phor all his dephiciencies 
of phine phorm and grace - 
With that phunny, phat nose 
sticking out of his phace - 

Despite two tons of power, 
and phierce ivory tusks, 
He's inphinitely more gentle 
and loving than us!

We may lauph in disdain 
at his unrephined pheatures, 
But he phorages in harmony 
with all other creatures.

He eats "phorests" phor breakphast, 
this huge vegetarian, 
But "Man" kills just phor phun!- 
the phiendish barbarian!

So . . . Behold the phat Ely-phunt, 
with his phunny exterior, 
Who restrains his phierce power, 
unlike Man, his superior.

But iph OUR brains phinish ophph 
our own war-pharing race, 
May the Ely-phunt remain . . . 
"Plain as the NOSE on his PHACE"!

Old Magoo