I must stress, this page is not for the weak hearted.

The newly awarded Best Quote in the Entire World:


"Jamie, you've humped Dustin, now go hump Leo!" -Liz
"No, one boy a night!" -Jamie
"That's all she can take...she needs to walk tomorrow." -Leo

*And then, Winston, I just ejaculated. -Jamie
*There are other things that are "bang bang choo choo train" that does not include the insertion of a penis into a vagina and thrusting. -Jana
*I kept trying to sit down and you just wanted to shove your creamsicle in my mouth. -Jana
*I am thoroughly convinced I want a penis tattooed on my face. -Jana
*If you do it with a hologram, is it considered masturbation? -Marlow

Have you ever been to a party with, like, only really corny music?
-Jamie
Yeah, it was called prom.
-Dustin

*Something just flew down my pants and died. -Jamie
*It's a one-cent penny! -Erica

If Captain Picard told me "Nicely done," I think I'd piss myself.
-Liz
I'd just go back to my quarters and masturbate.
-Jana

*I've gotta go before I start making puddles. -Meera
*Have you ever seen a guy's hanky-panky-baby-spank-me-giggle stick? (Be honest, now.) -The Question Game
*I just thought we had little crustaceans running around dying all over the place. -Jamie
Ha ha, this cell phone is so small, I'd lose it! I'd swallow it!
-Liz
Don't worry, it's titanium, it'd come out the other end.
-Leo
*When rape is inevitable, sit back and enjoy! -Jenny
*Don't ever do that again, but do it one more time. -Jamie
*Look, clitoris antennae. -Jana
*Fuck you and your cuteness. -Dustin

What? You climbed out of your coffin and wept?
-Jamie
I said, I microwaved my coffee and left.
-Liz

*Yeah, these pants, not so good. Why? Because they give me a penis. -Jamie
*That was a fixed-action response. I sent out a stimulus and she proceeded to mount me. -Meera
*I'm gonna name my kid Blip Blop Hicks. -Marlow
*I don't want your dirty juice. -Jamie
*I don't do the hoochie-coochie, like... -Katie
*You want a soft taco or my hard taco? -Naveed
*My world is spinning. -Marlow
*Let's study natural selection. I'll select you. -Jamie
*Oh my god I'm being attacked by women. There's mad humping going on. -Andrew
*What a bastard-hole-ass. -Liz
*Erica, you're much better than poop. -Jamie
*If I were old and dying, I would have sex a lot. -Liz

*It's like I'm living in China. -Jamie
What? You're a vagina? -Erica
*Excuse me, how'd you like to stick a thing with wings up your cooch? -Jessica
*See what I mean? Two bricks with one throwing of a brick. -Jamie
*Meera, I don't want to have sex with you until we're married. -Jamie
*I want some pussy. -Erica
*Look out of my pants. Is there still shit? -Jamie and Liz
*Fuck this shit. -Jamie
Fuck this shit. -Ian
*I'd rather be half a piece of plankton than a Chia Pet raped by Jonny Lang. -Liz
*I don't really have boobs. -Andrew
*Erica's the man of the house. That's why she's on top. -Liz
*I wish my ass smelled like this perfume. That would be nice. -Liz
*The piss, like, builds up inside me, and makes me weird. -Jamie
*They should make ice cream flavored like your mama's sweet ass! -Jamie

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Oh, and ha!
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