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Those of you who know me, know that I have helped a great many people make the transition from BDSM to Gor. This is something I love. To see that spark of wonder when one experiences that first glimpse of the beauty that I have found in Gor. This is something I will continue to do for those who treat it with the same respect I do.
Respect. A powerful and often misused word. The BDSM rooms have rules of conduct. Rules that are to be respected and followed by everyone who enters. When you are in these rooms you are expected to follow these rules regardless of whether you are a regular visitor or a first time tourist. As it should be. BDSM is a lifestyle based on respect.
Well, Gor has it's own rules of conduct. Rules that are to be followed by not only Goreans but by visitors as well. This is respect. How can a person demand respect for their way of life and yet not respect another's right to the same consideration? To go to another's home and not follow the protocals of that person's culture is not respect. That is called hypocrisy
BDSM vs Gor has been a topic of debate for as long as I can remember. The simple truth is that neither is "better" than the other. They are just different. They are worlds apart. Two completely different lifestyles, each with their own set of beliefs and ideals. Each individual is the only one qualified to determine which lifestyle is best suited to them.
Think about this... How would you react if someone entered a BDSM room and stated, "I do not want to know about this lifestyle. I do not want to be submissive (or Dominant). I just want to watch you for a while. While you do those "Dominant/submissive" things you do. So go ahead... tie someone up. Spank somebody. I just want to watch. Oh, and could you teach me how you do that "bowing to the Worthies" thing? I don't want to BE submissive, I just think it's cute."
Would you be insulted? Sure. Angry? Absolutely. This person would be making a mockery of your lifestyle and the things you believe in. You would be offended if not outraged.
That is exactly what Goreans feel when you come into our rooms to just "watch." Gor is not the zoo. We are not trained seals performing for your entertainment. We, like you, have discovered a lifestyle that we lead with passion and respect and we come online to be with others who do the same. To come to Gor to ask how to "serve hot" is an insult to the kajirae who put their hearts in each word on the screen.
Yes, there are players in Gor, just as there are in the BDSM rooms. But for many of us, this is not a game. It is our culture. Respect that if you choose to visit Gor. Those of us who have established Gorean rooms have gone to a great deal of effort to create websites so that information is readily avialable to any who show an interest. A websearch on Gor will produce thousands of pages on the net, most with at least the basic rules of protocal for what is expected behavior in a Gorean room. Take a few minutes to read them before you enter Gor. If you were going to a foreign country, would you just go, walk into someone's home there and demand that they teach you how to speak their language? No... of course you wouldn't. You would most likely find some books or materials and at least gain a working knowledge of their culture before going. This is respect.
One does not need to "become" Gorean simply to enter a Gorean room. But showing you have taken the time to at least get a basic understanding of what is expected of you is a show of respect. And you will be treated in kind. Barge into a Gorean room demanding to be taught, or with the attitude that you are somehow "entitled" to our time or attention and you will quickly be shown the door.
BDSM is a lifestyle based on Respect. If you come to Gor... bring it with you. |
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