enter

So you want to be Gorean...

It is said that there are two ways to enter Gor. One way insures while perhaps not an easy time on Gor, a chance. The other... well, it almost guarantees your days are numbered. I suggest you choose wisely which way you will enter Gor... You only get one chance.

Scenario #1

You have read all of the websites. Done a thorough search of Gor and absorbed every bit of Gorean trivia your brain can possibly hold. You haven't read the books, but that's ok... why bother to read 25 books when you can do the Cliff Notes version and learn it faster? Besides, what is on the sites must be true. I mean... they wouldn't make it up, would they?

So, armed with your Gorean Dictionary printed from some website, you log on and head for Gor. First, choose a name. Hmmmmm... Not having read any of the books, you're at a bit of a loss here, but any old generic name will do. Let's see. Oh I know, "Warrior_of_GOR" (insert Scribe, Panther Girl, Assassin or kajira in place of Warrior as applicable.) Ok, now you're good to go. You enter the room and immediately spam the screen with that canned macro you worked so hard on.

Warrior_of_GORSwoooooooops into the tavern, leaps from the saddle of his trusty TARN and strides into the tavern, leading his faithful LARL on it's leash. With a "Tal!" to the Free, and "greetings" to the sluts, he swaggers to a table, pulls out a chair and parks it, throwing his THARLARION skin booted feet up on the table. With one hand on the head of his "pet" LARL, his steel gray eyes pierce the dark room.... The sluts quiver in fright as his deep voice booms out, "PAGA with a KA-LA-NA chaser... And this Warrior is starving... Bring some BOSK steaks, and LARMA with a side order of TABUK ribs. And some KAL-DA to wash it down...HAR-TAR!!!"(It is important to CAP the Gorean terms so that everyone knows you have done your homework.)

If the Goreans in the room are in a particularly good mood, one might ask you where you are from.

Warrior_of_GOR replies,"I am from GOR!"

Ok, so our Goreans are bored and decide to play just a bit. Now they want to know what caste you are. Hmmm... think fast... Oh, saw that on a website... no problem.

Warrior_of_Gor replies,"I am from the Castle of the Dragons!"

"CLICK!"

As you go from room to room, you will hear that sound repeatedly. You will become more and more frustrated that no one appreciates your vast knowledge of things Gorean. You might get lucky and drop into one of the silly gamer rooms, in which case you may just find a home and live happily ever after. However, if you continue to enter mainstream Gorean rooms this way, you will find the warm welcome you expected never comes. You will be labeled a fool and ignored on sight. You could change your name, re-write the canned entrance, but the result will be the same.

Or, you could choose another path into Gor. A bit slower, and more work perhaps, but the odds of you actually reaching your destination are considerably higher.

Scenario #2

You enter Gor quietly. A simple "Tal and greetings" as you enter the room and then you simply state respectfully that you are new to Gor and wish to learn more. You ask for advice. Not as splashy as Scenario #1, but the results will be vastly different. There is bound to be at least one Gorean in the room who has not forgotten what it is like to be new. They will encourage you to find and read the books. They will steer you to the websites which contain valuable (and true) information. And they will patiently answer your endless questions, reminded of they days when they first discovered their Gorean heart. And while you are studying and learning, you will continue to visit Gorean rooms. Quietly watching and observing the way Goreans interact with each other. You will not become Gorean overnight. Instead, you will slowly "evolve." Each day learning more, feeling a bit more comfortable in the presence of Goreans. Until finally one day... perhaps in a room outside of Gor, someone will ask you, "Who are you?"

Without hesitating, you will reply, "I am Gorean."

You'll stop for a moment, while the words wash over you. Then, you will smile, knowing those words to be true.

You are indeed, Gorean.

Whichever path you choose, I wish you well,

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